


The Book of Noxaura - High Priestess of Skyrim

by BrenPaidhi



Category: Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Genre: 4e213, Adult Children, Eventual Romance, F/M, Falling In Love, Heimdall Aric Belrud Aamutähti (the Dovahkiin), Noxaura - Priestess of Potema, Revelations
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-14 00:00:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 33
Words: 131,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29659308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrenPaidhi/pseuds/BrenPaidhi
Summary: Was Potema unfairly maligned, just another strong woman who fell victim to a male dominated society?That is the view of Noxaura, Priestess of Potema. Nox has spent her entire adult life as a Necromancer and Priestess working with the other members of her Order towards the rebirth of the Wolf Queen, and what they believe will be the dawn of the Golden Age of Skyrim.But Noxaura is attacked and almost killed in the Rift while on a mission to Darklight Tower. She only survives because of the intervention of a mysterious man who is on his own mission investigating clandestine Thalmor activities in Skyrim. She will soon discover that this man also ended her Wolf Queen’s rebirth shortly after her mission began, and that not everything in Skyrim is what she believed it to be, especially the role that the Divines have chosen for her; the role that will eventually lead her to her destiny as Noxaura – High Priestess of Skyrim.Copyright © 2021Inspired by Noxaura - The Wolf Queen Priestess by Falmerbane.
Relationships: Lucia (Skyrim)/Vilkas (Elder Scrolls), Male Dovahkiin | Dragonborn/Elisif the Fair, Male Dovahkiin | Dragonborn/Jordis the Sword-Maiden, Male Dovahkiin | Dragonborn/Lydia, Male Dovahkiin | Dragonborn/Serana, Runa Fair-Shield & Farkas
Kudos: 3
Collections: Skyrim Fan Fiction





	1. We are definitely being followed

**Author's Note:**

> Preface
> 
> Each of us resides in our own Skyrim universe.  
> We are all Dragon Born; that much we have in common. But we are men or women, Nord or Imperial or Elf or a member of any number of custom races. We are fighters or thieves or mages, or a combination of the three.  
> Those of us who choose to write about our universe must begin somewhere, either in a cart on our way to the executioner’s block, or many years after that noteworthy day.  
> The Skyrim inhabited by Heimdall Aric Belrud Aamutähti, Dragon Born, Archmage, Companion, Thane of Haafingar, Eastmarch, the Pale, Whiterun and the Reach, is introduced to you in the two-hundred-thirteenth year of the Forth Era. Alduin is defeated, as is Harkon and Miraak. The Civil War rages on. Aric has long since scoffed at any attempt to limit him to adopting only two children. Now, at the not-so-ripe-old-age of forty-four, many of his adopted children are adults themselves, and actively assist him in bringing and maintaining peace to Skyrim, while still finding time for their own adventures. Some familiar faces have aged alongside Aric, others seem to be frozen in time. You may ask yourself “merciful Gods, how long have those two Redguard warriors been standing at the Whiterun gate asking about that woman?” It is a fair question.  
> As with all parallel universes, this one will diverge from your own in certain aspects. Please allow it to do so. It has a life of its own, as I discovered as I was documenting it.  
> We all ultimately have an appointment with the executioner’s block. It is what we do with the time we have while we inhabit this universe that matters. Use the time well.
> 
>   
> Acknowledgements
> 
> A Modder named FalmerBane wrote a small follower mod Noxaura – The Wolf Queen Priestess which introduced Noxaura to the Skyrim universe. She came equipped with a diary. It was during my most recent playthrough that I became acquainted with Nox and, after reading her diary, I thought it would be interesting to continue to add to it. Little remains of that original diary. What started out as a fun little idea grew into what you are about to read and, I hope, enjoy. In the process you may recognize incidents from the Amorous Adventures mod produced by Foxfingers, and from the Fight Against the Thalmor series by Dreifeis, female housecarls where there should be male, a twin sister that did not exist in game, an elimination of the cap on adoptable children, travel times that are longer than those experienced in normal game play, characters and language that will remind you of North American First Nations Peoples, an occasional word in Sanskrit, and magical spells and abilities that are not found anywhere in the Elder Scrolls universe. In my attempt to at least make a passing nod to lore friendliness I spent much time googling “Female Nord Names” and “Maps of Tamriel” and “Skyrim Travel Distances” and, my personal favorite, “How long did Serana spend entombed?”  
> A separate, and well deserved, thank you to the Skyrim modding community, who have kept Skyrim alive, and allowed it to thrive, for so long.
> 
> The Elder Scrolls® or Skyrim® names, logos, branding elements, artwork, etc. are the intellectual property of Bethesda Softworks.  
> This is a work of non-commercial fan fiction and not intended for, or to be used for, commercial purposes.
> 
> Note: I include a detail in Chapter 7 about an early life experience of Vilkas and Farkas that was written by another author, but I cannot for the life of me find it online again to give it the attribution it deserves. If someone recognizes it, please drop me a note and a link so I can include the author's name in my acknowledgements.

**2nd of Evening Star**

Traveling from Solitude to Morthal today Railius and I noticed a pair of Vampires watching us as we approached Dragon’s Bridge after nightfall. They were no threat to us, these being the minor variety and rather pathetic creatures, a danger only to cattle and small children. I suppose they should be allowed to exist. At any rate, they are Dragon Bridge’s responsibility to ignore or address as they see fit. We have business of our own. Eventually they will serve Potema, as will Railius and I, when her resurrection is complete.

Railius seemed restless tonight. I'm not sure why, but it concerns me.

"What is it that bothers you?" I asked him

"Nothing." he replied. As he turned to look at the road behind us. "Just a feeling."

"The Divines give us feelings for a reason." I said

"The Divines give us intellect to interpret those feelings." he replied. "That it what I am doing."

“I can take the reins if you require the full capacity of your intellect.” I said

“I can do both, and it is too early in our journey to risk damage to the cart. Oof! If you continue to abuse your servants you will develop a reputation, and no one will work for you in future.” He said, as my elbow found his ribs unprotected.

“Please do not call yourself a servant, you know that it upsets me.” I reminded him.

“Yes, mistress. Oof!”

* * *

We departed Dragon's Bridge in the early morning. Our journey to Darklight Tower will take many days. Our progress is slow, but steady. "The Gods teach us patience." I could hear Mother Pevel's voice. "In the boiling of a kettle or the movement of a grindstone." She may as well have added "In the journey from Morthal to Darklight Tower to deliver a message to a small Necromancer cult."

The timing of this trip is odd. I objected when Reverend Mother Catilia told me of it, and that the task was being given to me; but she put up a hand to stop me. We all felt that we were close to Potema’s return, and the excitement was growing. "Now is not the time for anyone to be away. And there are other groups of Necromancers much closer than the Rift. This journey will take me many days just to arrive there. Twice as long to return." I said, but I was not given a choice. "Do as you are ordered. Pray on your lack of Faith." she said. "I do not lack Faith” I said, “I lack understanding."

I still do not understand. Potema herself will draw converts by the thousands when she is reborn, and the Golden Age of Skyrim begins. Where is the logic in sending me halfway across Skyrim to recruit a handful of Necromancers?

“It doesn’t make sense.” Railius said afterward. “And it’s not right. You worked as hard as anyone.”

“And yet I have not been allowed to learn the final mysteries. I have not been included in the final preparations. She does not trust me.” I said

“She doesn’t like you, is what it is. She’s always had it in for you.” He said.

“What have I done to deserve this treatment?” I asked for the one-thousandth time.

“You’re smarter than her. She doesn’t like that.” He said

“There are others smarter than I am that are included in the mysteries.” I reminded him.

“They aren’t young and beautiful.” He said. “You are my daughter in all but blood. Listen to an old solider. Don’t go back. They don’t deserve you. We can find a place to start a new life.”

“You are my father in all but blood. I love you.” I told him, again, for the one-thousandth time. “But I am a Priestess of Potema. That is my life. You know that.”

“I know.” He said. “I just don’t want to travel to the Rift and back.”

His laughter lightened my heart.

We arrived in Morthal late in the day. It feels like we are being followed. It is just a feeling, but it makes me uneasy. I told Railius.

"The Divines give us feelings for a reason." he said with a smile.

"Your wit is very sharp. Do not cut yourself upon it." I answered, matching his tone and smile. Our common, comfortable banter, but it did not conceal the tension.

"I suspected it since Dragon’s Bridge." he said.

That is why he has been so tense. 

We were not the only ones who seemed tense. The villagers in Dragon’s Bridge as we were leaving seemed tense as well. We saw several villagers having private, whispered conversations that would cease when we drew near and resume only after we have moved away. 

“They are not usually this wary of strangers.” I said at the time.

“Villagers are superstitious by nature” Railius said. “It’s part of living this close to the land.”

“I begin to think that we are not the only strangers in Dragon’s Bridge.” I said.

“There do seem to be more people, more horses, more mismatched armor.” He said. “I don’t like the look of some of them.”

“They cannot all be bandits.” I said. “There is nothing in Dragon’s Bridge to attract this may brigands.” I said.

“Nothing I know of.” Railius said as we left Dragon’s Bridge.

* * *

"Who would follow us for so long? We have nothing of value." I said as we continued our journey, the feeling of foreboding continued.

"We have you." he said.

"If their plan is to capture me and enslave or sell me, they will die disappointed." I said,

"Does not everyone who dies die disappointed?" he asked.

"Do not read books on Philosophy while the cart is moving. You know it makes you ill." I said. 

“It is not the motion that makes me ill, it is the philosophy." he said.

* * *

We departed Morthal yesterday and continued east, leaving the road yesterday just north of Labyrinthian, taking a path heading southeast that Railius says leads to a path through the mountains.

“It takes us all the way to Hamvir’s Rest.” He said confidently. “We pick up the main road again there, and then on to Whiterun.”

However, his confidence seemed to dwindle today. We had navigated the southern slope heading down out of the mountains and approached a clearing dotted with trees.

“Have you forgotten the path?” I asked him. 

“I think it is that way.” He said in too loud a voice as he walked back towards me. Something was not right.

“What good is a shorter route if you cannot remember it?” I said in too loud a voice as well.

“We got company.” He said when he was close enough to speak quietly.

I knew better than to doubt him

“Where?” I asked

“That stand of trees down there, on the left. It is the only way out, unless we want to go back the way we came.” He said.

Are there others?” I asked.

“There may be.” He answered.

“These are not the ones that were following us. They could not have arrived so far ahead of us.” I asked

“No, these are different men. Maybe the same group, but different men.”

“What do you suggest?” I asked.

“It’s just the two of us, riding in a cart. We make a poor cavalry charge.” He said. “We have to draw them out to gauge their numbers. Once we know that we will have to decide quick what we will do.”

“I will wait until they reveal themselves until I drink a potion. Can you reach your bow and quiver?” I asked him

“Quick as I need to lass.” He said. 

“How will we know that there are not more still hiding in the trees?” I asked him

“We won’t.” he said.

More time would not make us more ready, so we started off again. We had covered three quarters of the distance when four men stepped out from behind the trees.

“Four is not so bad.” I said quietly.

“Four is the minimum.” Railius reminded me.

“None of them have bows.” I said.

“The bows will be in the trees if there are any.” He said.

We were now within bow range of the trees.

“Stand to one side or the other lads! You block the path and my lady has business in Whiterun.” Railius shouted.

“You have business here first, old man!” The center most brigand shouted back.

“That wasn’t very nice.” Railius whispered to me.

“And they seemed so friendly at first.” I whispered back.

“we don’t wish no trouble lads!” he shouted, “Let us pass and we can all live another day!”

There laughter was the only answer I required, so I sent a fireball into the stand of trees. The four men turned for a moment to watch its path, and so the center most brigand died never seeing the arrow that killed him. I killed the man next to him with an ice spear as he was turning back, and then raised both the dead brigands so they could engage their recent partners, who were still stunned by the turn of events. Railius jumped off the cart with his sword as I drank a potion.

The two men who had been hiding in the now burning trees had emerged. Bows in hand and stopped to notch arrows.

 _Too slow, I think._ I thought to myself and I paralyzed them both as Railius ran up to them.

It was over quickly for them after that.

* * *

We arrived in Whiterun finally, an opportunity to stop, buy more supplies, and sleep under a roof, in a bed, and to have a meal we did not cook ourselves. I also found some bargains on books. There was a Khajiit caravan at the gate and I was able to buy a very nice hand-crafted rug and an obscure tome on enchanting that may be quite useful in my research. Railius spent more than his usual amount of time admiring the work of the local blacksmiths. Whiterun is home to what is reportedly the finest blacksmith and forge in Skyrim; the only forge that produces Sky Steel. The look of envy in Railius’ eyes as he admired the swords on display was reason enough for the giant of a blacksmith to keep Railius in his sight at all times. 

“He is watching you like you are a thief.” I said.

“He is a poor judge of men if he thinks I am young enough or fast enough to outpace him with an armload of stolen weapons and armor.” He replied. “I can barely run carrying the weapons and armor I am wearing.”

“You did well enough in the mountains.” I reminded him. 

“That don’t count.” He said

“Why not?” I asked

“You had paralyzed them before I got to them.” He said.

“Your pride is not wounded, surely.” I said. “They attacked both of us. Should I not play my part in our defense?”

“You played more than your part. And at my age I have little pride left that doesn’t reside in you lass.” He said.

“You spoil me. All men must suffer in comparison. I shall never find a husband to compare to you.” I said after I had kissed his cheek.

“You shall certainly find one younger, and better looking.” He said. “But for the rest, if he don’t spoil you, or open his thoughts and his heart for you to see, good and bad, in the bright light of day, if he don’t love you more than life itself, he is not for you.

“You set a high bar for me father.” I said my voice growing thin.

“You’re my daughter. I set a high bar for any man who would take you from me.” He said, his eyes shining.

Railius signals that we are ready, and it is time to leave. He checks our horse’s hooves once again, speaks a quiet word in his ear, and climbs onto the cart.

Whiterun is a beautiful city. Neither ornate nor opulent, but filled with children playing, warriors of every stamp, and beautiful woman, some in just as beautiful armor.

“I wish we had more time.” I said. “I would spend a week there and take my ease. Visit the farms, the meadery, sit under the Gildergreen and read.”

“You can’t read under the Gildergreen with that priest of Talos bellowing all day.” Railius said. “But I would sit there all day and watch that Priestess come and go from the temple.”

“I am outraged sir! She is a Priestess, as I am!” I said, the effect ruined by my laughter.

“If she is a Priestess like you then she can defend herself without your help.” He said

“It seems to be a very happy city.” I said

“I didn’t like the look of them two standing at the gate.” He said, “They was up to no good, stopping everyone who passed.”

“They were looking for a woman.” I said

“So am I. but I don’t go accosting strangers going about their business.” He said.

“You have women on your mind today is seems.” I said playfully.

“I have been thinking of Vila.” He said. “We would celebrate her birthday during the North Wind’s Prayer Festival. That’s in a few days.”

“I am sorry. I have not kept a good account of the passing days.” I said.

“You have other matters to consider. I can keep the calendar well enough for both of us.” He said.

We rode in silence for some time, each of us consumed by our own thoughts. _It is time to end this spell._ I finally thought.

“It cannot be true that Khajiit are banned from entering any city in Skyrim, can it?” I asked

“Only the caravans are banned, lass.” He answered, his back straightening as he wiped his face. “But it might as well be an outright ban. Most of the Khajiit in Skyrim are in them caravans. They don’t like the weather. Too cold.”

“I cannot say I am a great fan of the weather either, though I have lived here most of my life.” I replied

The road was bumpy. Our cart had seen too many winters and would benefit from new springs. I mention it to him as we return to the main road.

“The cart isn’t the only thing that could use new springs, and that has seen too many winters.” He said.

“Such a fuss. If complaining keeps one young you will not age another day.” I said.

“My knee is stiff in the morning. Injured it in a battle a long time ago.” He said.

It was one of his favorite stories, and I did not have the heart to rob him.

“Was it a battle with Dominion soldiers?” I asked, my face as blank as I could manage.

“It was a battle with Vila.” He said.

His laughter was more than enough reward, and a balm for my heart.

* * *

We are definitely being followed. Railius thinks they are the same bandits, but would simple bandits follow two travelers with little of value for this long?

“They don’t always have good cover. That’s the only reason we have any idea of their numbers.” He said

“They must certainly know we have seen them.” I said

“They know.” He answered. “It’s a bad sign that they don’t seem to care.”

We entered the mountains again, taking the pass east of Helgen known as Haemar's Pass.

“They do not seem to be in a rush. They are keeping the interval between us.” I said.

“If they are going to attack, they will do it before the bitter temperatures and driving winds we will find at the higher elevations.” He answered.

“Those conditions will surely disadvantage them.” I said.

“They will disadvantage all of us.” He replied.

“There is a cave on this route that was home to a nest of vampires before an apprentice of the Greybeards sent them all to Oblivion.” I said. “We can shelter there if we are desperate.”

“We would be trapped inside. They could collapse the entrance.” He said.

“But it would be a more defensible position.” I said.

“Not a lot of traffic on this road, bad conditions near the top. Better for bandit hide outs than for bandit attacks. It doesn’t make sense they would follow us this long. There were easier places to attack us.” He said

“unless they do not want us to be found. We start up into the pass and disappear.” I said. “Ample places to hide two bodies.”

“If so, then they definitely aren’t simple bandits.” He said. 

“Nothing about this journey makes sense to me.” I said

* * *

They attacked as we were coming down the East side of the mountain. Our horse was struck by an arrow and the cart lost control and we skidded off the road and the cart overturned. I am bruised and sore, and if not for the snow drift I would be in worse condition. Railius was able to kill most of the bandits before he succumbed to his wounds, I was able to finish the rest. 

I held him while I cried, and sobbed, and wailed my grief at the sky while my tears washed his face, his head on my shoulder, my arms around him.

“Railius? Father? Please. Father, please get up. Don’t leave me.”

I began to rock him slowly then, while I sang a song to him. A mirror image of the two of us when I was a child and had a bad dream. He would hold me and rock me back to sleep while he sang to me. My turn, now, to rock him to the eternal sleep that awaits us all.

I picked a peaceful spot under a tree and then raised two of the bandits and had them dig a grave while I cleaned Railius’ face and smoothed his hair. I only had to fill in the last bit of the grave after the bandits turned to dust.

He was the only Father I had known. For over twenty years it was Railius I would turn to when I was in need, be it a sprained ankle or a broken heart or a wounded ego. “You’re my good lass.” He would say. “You will be a high Priestess one day. Be fair. Be just. Be honest. Be the Nox that I know.” I could hear his voice in my head, as the tears and sobbing started again. 

Did the Divines send me here to punish me, to rob me of that which I held most dear? Do the Divines even know I exist? This pointless journey has taken my father from me and stranded me in the wilderness. He would still be alive, but for Mother Catilia’s animus towards me. If I am somehow able to return home before her rebirth, Potema will have one fewer servant when she is reborn. I swore it, looking at Railius’ grave before realizing: two fewer servants.


	2. Divines do not let me die in this shack

**25th of Evening Star**

There is an abandoned shack a short distance from our crashed cart. It is certainly better than the makeshift shelter I had to improvise last night under our crashed cart, when I had to resort to burning some of my books to keep warm. The shack needs work. It is filthy and infested with spiders. While they make fine ingredients for potions, I don't want them crawling on me in my sleep. I raised the remaining dead bandits and used them to move anything still of use to the shack and to construct a patio. I was able to get most of the larger pieces moved before their bodies turned to dust. I burned most the furniture but was able to save an end table, a chair, and an old alchemy station left by the previous owner.

I realized that my map to Darklight tower was inside one of the books I burned. I have no idea where it is other than a day or two's ride East of this shack. Even if I knew the way I would not be able tr travel there on foot with only what supplies I could carry. I will have to find someone that knows the way and that can take me there. I have no idea how I will return to Solitude.

* * *

Railius would laugh if he saw me repairing the roof of the shack.

“That’s not the right tool for that.” He would say

“It is the only tool I have.” I would answer

“You have no future in carpentry.” He would laugh

“I am not certain I have a future of any type.” I would answer

“You’re my smart lass. This is just another problem. You have solved harder ones. Remember, one step at a time.” He would remind me.

“Yes, Father.” I would answer.

It began to rain as I continued to repair the roof, my tears mixing with the raindrops.

I discovered another grave near the shack. The final resting place of Konrad Volsgaard. It seems that I am not the first person to mourn a loss here. I cannot decide whether this shack is lucky or unlucky. Two graves near a forlorn shack in the wilderness is two graves too many. But with the roof repaired it is much drier than any other option I have. 

I found the remaining ingredients I needed and brewed a batch of healing potion. It is not my best work, but it is good enough that most of my wounds and injuries are healing quickly. The batch was enough to fill two bottles, but I should look for ingredients to brew more as a precaution.

I am running low on some supplies. There is a small village to the north east of me. It is my only choice for buying supplies. Possibly someone could point me to Darklight Tower, but I will have to be careful that they do not grow suspicious about why I ask. Necromancers are uniformly mistrusted if not outright hated. Potema may not be well known in a small village this far from Solitude, but what reputation the Wolf Queen does have in Skyrim is not good. Quite the opposite.

I had no choice but to travel to the nearby village yesterday for supplies. I was not the only visitor, but it seems I was still out of place, and the looks I received convinced me that asking about the tower was a mistake. However, their mood brightened somewhat at the amount of supplies I bought, which included two chickens and more potion ingredients. 

“Where can I purchase ingredients for healing potions?” I asked loud enough for others to hear, Healers having a much better reputation than Necromancers. 

I paid a boy and his pack animal to transport my supplies back to my shack. He was talkative on the journey back; banal, comfortable talk about local gossip as well as the civil war. It required only an occasional “Is that so?” on my part. I did not realize how I had missed the sound of another voice. 

I completed the Blue Moons forge this evening, using parts from the old forge near the shack. My third attempt to spark the flame succeeded, but the enchantment is still not working as well as I would like. At least I can work on my blades and bound weapons again. I will study my texts and work on improving the enchantment.

* * *

I planted a garden last week that has been overrun by rabbits. I killed one for dinner this evening, but I cannot bear to kill the mother and her two kits. I suppose there is enough food for all of us and they seem very friendly. They are certainly better companions than the spiders.

Still not one soul has passed by the shack. I may have to travel back to the village again. They surely asked the boy where he brought me, but on one has been curious enough to venture out to see for themselves. I am not surprised. They did not strike me as inquisitive; more likely to murmur amongst themselves while casting me furtive glances than to ask me a direct question. I am sure small villages separated from their neighbors learn to keep to themselves and not get involved in the affairs of others.

I have been repairing the Dwemer bath that someone built on the remains of an imperial tower close to my shack. I started working on it as a distraction, never thinking I could get it working. I need oil for the heater to be sure, but I believe it is ready to test. I will buy oil tomorrow when I return to the village for supplies.

I have become quite the expert on rebuilding and repairing old equipment. The forge, the bath. If I could repair my cart and my horse I could be away from here.

* * *

Thank the Divines! The bath is working. I cannot count how many trips it took me to carry enough water up those steps to fill it, but it does not appear to leak, and the heater is burning, and the water is heating. 

However, I am sure that the villagers believe I have gone mad from my isolation in the wilderness. They had no idea what to make of my request.

“Oil, miss?”

“Yes, good sir. I wish to purchase oil. Two gallons should suffice.”

“Two gallons, miss? What are you cooking?”

“It is not for cooking, sir, it is for the heater for my bath. To heat the water.”

“Bath, miss? Bath’s make you foul sick, miss. Everyone knows that.”

“Do you have two gallons of oil for my heater, or no, sir?”

“It be Dwemer oil, miss. We use it on cart axles, and the grindstone shaft in the mill.”

“If it is not thick, or heavy, it should do well.”

I paid the boy with the pack animal to help me carry the oil up the stairs and fill the heater, but he would not help with the water.

“That will take forever, miss, and I have chores to attend.”

“I understand, young sir. Thank you for your assistance.” I said.

After that is was a long blur of stairs, but the bath is full and heating, and I intend to lounge in my first hot bath in quite some time with a cup of wine and one of my books, even if I have to wait until midnight for the water to be hot, and read by candle light.

I look around and think that this shack has become a bit like home, and that I shall be sad to leave it.

Upon further consideration, I shall not be the least bit sad to leave it.

I saw another bear today. there seems to be no end to them. Or wolves. I lost one of my chickens before I could scare it away. 

I cannot continue in this manner forever. Eventually I will run out of gold. I must be away while I still have the means to do so. There is no regular transportation that stops at the village. The closest city or village where I can hire transportation back to Solitude is Riften, to the south and east. I will have to hire someone from the village to take me to Riften. Then Riften to Solitude. Mother Catilia will not be happy, but neither will I be. I will tell her what happened and how I have lost the only Father I have known for over twenty years. If all she does is chastise me for failing my mission, I will most certainly kill her. 

Someone is coming.

* * *

They approached on foot, and they were much quieter than their size suggested. They had already separated and were almost on opposite sides of my shack when I stepped out. The one on the left had a shield. 

And they had been forewarned. The one on the right had a ward spell ready, the one on the left’s shield was warded as well.

 _Not good._ I thought. “These are not simple brigands, and this is no chance encounter. They came with protections.”

I had very few options. 

“They are too far apart.” I realized, almost hearing Railius voice.

“They didn’t want to give you an easy target, and that gives you a chance.” He would say.

It was a Frost Atrinoch for the shield man as I cast my bound sword spell and charged towards the man with the ward. He had not expected a series of strikes and ripostes. He kept his ward ready, fighting one handed. He would have to make a choice eventually whether to keep the ward at the ready, but that was time I did not have. My Frost Atrinoch would not delay the shield man much longer, and this one was a better swordsman than me, which he demonstrated on his next parry when he stuck me hard with his shoulder throwing me off balance before spinning and catching my side with the tip of his blade.

I could see it in his face. If he had simply retreated, deflected my spells with his ward, and waited for his companion, I was dead. But he wanted to finish me himself. He attacked with a flourish I could not follow and struck my shoulder next and, as I stumbled, spun behind me to strike my back. He attacked again, but my parry was slower, and his sword slashed my thigh.

I stepped back and cast iron-flesh as he followed me. My wounds were not too serious but would need tending to very soon. I would not survive much longer in this fashion.

“He likes that spinning attack too much.” Railius’ voice said in my mind. “for a moment in the middle of his attack he is facing away from you.”

I needed to make my attempt while I could. I copied my attack from earlier and, as he began to ram his shoulder into me and begin his spin I pivoted and stepped back and cut him across the backs of his knees while his back was turned towards me. His legs failed and, as he fell face down an ice spear from my left hand finished him.

I cast a spell to close my wounds, but it was not having much affect.

The shield man had taken longer with my Frost Atrinoch that I had expected, or my battle with the other man had taken less time that I realized. He still had his shield. _He does not seem to like my Atrinoch_ I thought, as I raised his former companion to help me. It was then three against one long enough for me to get behind him. His shield was occupied defending him from his companion. I paralyzed him from behind and his companion finished him just as my Atrinoch disappeared.

I raised the second assassin and while they were digging graves for themselves, I took a healing potion and attempted to close my wounds again. It was then that I realized the seriousness of my situation.

 _Something is wrong._ I thought. _I am not healing properly._

And I was beginning to feel decidedly unwell.

By the time I had filled in the second grave I knew that something was seriously wrong with me.

 _It seems they were not only equipped with wards._ I thought, as I removed my bloody clothing and lay on my bed and took my final healing potion. It wasn’t working. Whatever poison it was, it was resisting my spells and potions.

 _Divines do not let me die in this shack._ I prayed before my mind grew dark.

* * *

“You are a mess.” Railius said.

“I look better than the two that attacked me.” I said.

“Thank you for not burying them next to me. I don’t want them for neighbors.” He said.

“I would not have buried them at all except that I already have trouble with scavengers.” I said. “You deserve more than a grave in the wilderness.”

“A grave in the wilderness is exactly what an old soldier expects.” He said.

“You are not an old soldier, you are my father, and I would build a monument for you if I could.” He said.

“Too much for me. Give me a stone that says, ‘Here lies an honest soldier and man’ and it will be plenty.”

“This bed is likely to be my final resting place. No stone for either of us. But at least we will be close to each other.” I said.

“I will always be close to you, even if you can’t see me.” He said.

“If I die here, we can be together again.” I said, my voice cracking as my tears started.

“We will be together again, never you fret lass. But don’t be in too much of a rush. You have a whole life to live. It was never going to be with me, even if I died in my bed at a ripe old age. You have many more years in your future. A family. Children. A man that deserves you, not that many do.” He said.

“I cannot imagine a future like that.” I said.

“You don’t have to imagine it.” He said with a smile. “I just described it to you.”


	3. You have no idea what I am

**23rd of Morning Star**

It was the daughters face that I saw first, as she knelt by my bed. A young mage in training, not used to finding wounded and dying women in the wilderness. The shock on her face was clear. She stood up as I closed my eyes.

“She is in desperate condition.” I heard her say. “She has many wounds, and fever. She will certainly die unless we do something.”

Someone replied but I could not hear clearly. A hand was placed on my head, the covers lifted briefly from me, the cold air started a bout of shivering through my whole body.

 _Please just let me die to stop this retched shaking._ I thought.

“That’s no way to talk lass. Here’s good people to help you.” Railius said

“How do you know they are good?” I asked him.

“Because they stopped. He doesn’t give much away, but those young ones are worried sick about you.” He answered. 

“If I continue to shake in this manner, I will loosen all my teeth.”

“What did you say?” a young voice asked.

“I was talking to Railius.” I answered.

“It is the fever.” I heard another voice say. “Give her the potion. After that another blanket. And build up the fire. We should brew more.”

“Are we staying?” someone asked.

“Yes. We will not leave her alone. Set the tents close to the shack. Sara may sleep next to her patient if she chooses. I will make sure the horses do not eat her garden.”

“I am not prepared for visitors.” I said to the wilderness in general.

“Father, help me prop her up so she can drink this.”

“Miss. Miss! Please concentrate. You need to drink this. All of it. Then you can rest, I promise. Open your eyes.”

“Open your eyes lass. A short time and then you can rest.”

“Father, a bear killed one of my chickens.” I told him

“There is no shortage of chickens, lass. We can buy more. Be my good girl now and open your eyes and drink.”

I drank the potion, but whether I opened my eyes I do not remember.

* * *

I knew I was much better when I became conscious of the fact that I was not wearing anything under the covers of my bed. His son did not fail to notice either. A young warrior, and attractive in his young way; but still a boy where it came to women, especially naked ones. Sara (the daughter) was the one that seemed most concerned for my well-being, at least she was the one who showed it.

But is seems she had not chosen Restoration as her school of training and asked her Father to look at me. 

“She is much better.” I heard her say “But some of her wounds are healing slower than others, and there may be some lingering fever.”

“It is almost certainly poison. A resistant variety. Start making more ointment.” He said in a mid-range voice with low undertones. “I will check on her.”

He had the gift of Restoration. He placed his hand on the side of my face and looked into my eyes. 

“I need to look at your wounds.” He said. “Sara does not have enough experience with wounds of this nature. It is a violation of your privacy, I know. I apologize.”

He was speaking, but I barely heard it. It was like I was standing next to a waterfall. I felt energy, almost a vibration. I feeling that is also a sound, drowning out his words. It took me a moment to recover before I could speak.

“I would be dead but for your assistance.” I said. “Under the circumstances, a sacrifice of my privacy is a small price to pay.”

“I promise I will be brief.” He said. “It may make you more comfortable if you were to close your eyes. I will ask Sara be present.”

“You are very kind sir, but that is not necessary.” I said. “I am covered in wounds, dirt, and dried blood. I am as unappetizing as week old mutton. And I am in no danger of swooning at the thought of a man seeing me unclothed. You may proceed.”

He did not require Sara’s help, but he pretended that he did to have an excuse for her to be present as he looked at each of my wounds; his eyes lingering over the ones that she had mentioned, that had not made the same progress in healing as the others. He said, "you should recover completely in a few days. The poison that is stopping you from healing is resistant to magic and potions. But, as with many things, to make something stronger in one respect weakens it in others. We will attack this poison the way it attacked you: through the wounds on your body. We are finishing an ointment that we will apply directly to your wounds that should work well." He stood. “Sara will help you.”

His visit had indeed been brief. He left the shack and continued finishing the ointment, as Sara sat on the edge of my bed.

"My father made the potion you drank last night.” She said. “He will finish making the ointment. He is very skilled. His potions and ointments always work. Do you want to try and wash off some of the dirt and dried blood?"

There was nothing I would have like more, but for some reason I asked, “Is the water in the bath still warm?”

“Let me check.” She said. I watched her as she walked up the steps to the bath and test the water with her hand. The it seemed that she placed her other hand in the water and cast a spell. Steam began to drift up from the bath.

“It is just the right temperature now.” She said. “At least, it is the temperature I like for my own bath.”

“How did you heat up the water?” I asked

“It is an alteration spell my father taught me.” She said, “It causes my hand and arm to get very hot and then I place it in the water.”

I have never heard of that type of spell, and I said as much.

“It’s meant as a defensive spell.” She said. “You can cast it so that if someone touches you your skin will burn them.” Then she started to laugh. “My father jokes that he casts that spell on all his daughters when they become old enough to be interested in boys.”

“How many daughters does your father have?” I asked, smiling against my will.

“Six.” She said

“I can understand why he might consider such a spell.” I said. “I am glad my father did not know that spell.”

She helped me up, wrapped me in her cloak and helped me to the steam bath. The Father and son must have taken their ointment making elsewhere because they were nowhere in sight.

“Father thought you would like some privacy.” Sara said.

“He expressed his concerned with my privacy when he was checking my injuries.” I reminded her, the memory of him lifting the covers from my naked body to look at my wounds still fresh.

“He would never do anything that was improper. You are his responsibility. “she said. “besides” she added with a laugh “he already has more than enough opportunities to view naked women.”

“I hope all his opportunities do not involve women who are wounded and covered in dirt and blood.” I said.

“I suspect not.” She said laughingly.

The bath was bliss. “Thank you for your help.” I said, easing into the excellent water. “I compliment you on the water temperature.”

“Rest a time. I will be back soon.” She answered.

I felt much better coming back down the steps, which is good because the shock of seeing a vampire standing by my shack offering me clean clothes was a shock indeed. She noticed, of course she did; but she said nothing, she handed me the cloths and left without a word. Someone had placed a clean bedroll, bandages, and a small container of ointment on my mattress. Sara dressed and bandaged my wounds and helped me dress. When I lay down, she gave me a smaller potion, and as I drifted off, she said "don't worry. You're all right. I will stay with you."

* * *

The vampire found the two graves. Of course, she found the two graves. Leave it to a vampire to find fresh graves. She was probably looking for a place to sleep for herself. At least she waited until I had finished the first meal I had eaten in days before asking about them. It was the first chance I had to explain how I came to be in the state they found me in. 

“I am so sorry about Your father.” Sara said. “I cannot imagine how terrible that must have been for you.” She had been brushing my hair when I started to tell the story but stopped when I recounted the bandit attack. I thought she was about to cry when I mentioned Railius, but instead she held my hand and moved closer to me so that our shoulders were touching. She may not have trained as a healer, but she had the empathy of one. She adjusted the blanket around me and waited for me to complete my story.

“And you have been living here alone ever since?” She asked

“Yes.” I answered “I did not have the means to go any great length on my own. I had hoped that someone who come by that could take me to a city and I could arrange transportation. I had planned to ask one of the villagers to take me to Riften, but the bandits found me first.”

“We have a former companion that makes poisons like the one you mentioned.” The vampire said. “You are lucky to be alive.”

Her eyes glowed slightly, and her lips never quite closed. I imagined that she was looking at me in much the same manner that I looked at that poor rabbit before it became my dinner.

“What type of alchemist makes that type of poison?” I asked. I had never heard of a poison that was resistant to magic or healing potions.

“An alchemist that is also a recovering Hagraven.” She answered.

Sara had resumed brushing my hair. “Well, you are in our care now. It will take a few days before you can travel safely, and my father has said that we will not leave you hear alone, so you are more than welcome to travel with us.” She said

“You do not have enough horses for all of us.” I said.

“We will manage.” She said. “You can ride double with Samuel. He will not mind.”

Samuel had been paying discreet but total attention to our conversation, and his look said everything. The prospect of our riding double seemed equal parts exciting and terrifying to him. Definitely, not much experience with women. 

I could hear Railius’ voice in my mind: “those children do their parents’ credit. That lads a proper warrior. He can probably recite the whole code. He barely knows you and already he would defend you with his life and expect nothing in return. And that lass there. She has already adopted you as her sister. Bairns don’t get that way by accident. Lita would have turned out like them if she had had the time. She would have turned out like you.”

“Because you would have taught her, and she would have wanted to make you proud.” I said, “Like you taught me. And like I wanted you to be proud of me.”

“You made me proud. There aren’t enough stars in the sky to count how proud I am of you. You’re my good lass.”

A sob escaped my throat as my tears fell unfettered. Sara stopped brushing my hair to put her head on my shoulder and wrap her around me. Her head and arm found some of my wounds, but I did not care.

“They will take me away and you will be alone.” I said to him in my mind.

“I’m not staying here once you’re gone. There’s nothing for me here, though the weather seems to agree with my knee. It hasn’t hurt since we got here” He said, the smile I know so well shining from his face.

* * *

He found me while I was visiting Railius' grave. There were wildflowers nearby and I picked some and placed them by his head.

“I love you.” I said to him as I patted the earth above his head; that head of grey hair that only I was allowed to trim. 

“I like the way you cut it.” He would say.

He kept his distance and waited for me to begin walking back to the shack. My heartbeat quicker as I walked closer to him, repeating its behavior in the shack.

 _Why does he affect me so?_ I thought.

“How are you feeling?” he asked me.

“I feel healed, and clean, and fed, which is better than I have felt in quite some time.” I answered. “And for that, I have you to thank.”

“I am glad to hear it, for we must leave soon.” He said, “And I think you will agree that the next time someone is sent to visit you there will be more than two, and it will end badly.”

“I am perfectly capable of looking after myself.” I answered. It was a silly thing to say. The only reason I survived the last attack was because of him and his family.

“Of that I have no doubt.” He said, “But perhaps it is best if you look after yourself somewhere else.”

“I had never intended to make this my home.” I said, “I was only waiting for the means to leave.”

“Please allow us to be those means. We will escort you to whatever destination you chose.” He said, “You are healing well, but it will be several days before you have regained your strength.”

“The head of my order had given me a task to complete to the southwest of Riften, but I burned my map accidentally while I was trying to stay warm.” I told him

“Is that where you wish to go?” he asked me. I was sure his manner changed slightly when he asked me.

“I was given the task, and it is not completed.” I said, “It is near enough to Riften, so if your generosity extends that far you could escort me there afterwards and I can hire transportation back to Solitude.” 

For a moment his look changed. His eyes seemed to lose focus, almost like all his mind was directed elsewhere. 

We were back at the shack.

“May we sit?” he asked I sat on my bed and he sat in the only chair within a mile.

“We discovered your diary on your nightstand when we discovered you.” He said and my heart lurched. “we had not meant to pry. We did not know what it was. We sought only clues to who you were and why you were living in so remote a location, and how you came to be in the state we found you.”

My face became hot and my heart felt like it would leap from my chest.

“You certainly accomplished your mission of finding out more about me.” I said bitterly “How much did you read?”

“almost nothing. Enough to see it was a personal diary, at which point I lay it back down, and made sure no one disturbed it. But also, enough to know of the task you were given.”

“Do you then refuse to assist me?” I asked. He had already known when he offered to escort me somewhere else. When he had saved my life. 

“No. I will assist you. But I must give you news you will find very disturbing.” He said. “A journey to Darklight Tower would be for naught. Your Wolf Queen’s rebirth is ended. I ended it myself shortly after your journey began. Her remains have been sanctified and laid to rest in Solitude. She was given all rites befitting a queen, but she will never rise again.”

It was like someone had cast a spell and paralyzed me.

 _Dead. She is truly dead._ I thought. And then: _The man who had just saved my life had killed my queen._

"I'm sorry" he said.

"I don't want your pity." I snapped. If I had been stronger, I would have killed him.

"It isn't pity.” He said “I'm sorry for the pain I caused you. I would have spared you the pain, especially since you have lost so much on this journey, but I thought it dishonest not to tell you, and I did not want you to be in our company for so long without knowing.”

I looked at his children, sitting and throwing twigs into the fire.

“They were not involved.” He said, reading my mind. “They know nothing of it.”

“The vampire?” I asked him

“Yes. She was there.” He answered

“Others?” I asked

“Yes.” He said

“The Hagraven?” the thought revolted me.

“No.” he answered

“Did any survive?” I asked

“None that opposed us survived.” He said “But we did not search afterwards. It is certainly possible that some survived.”

“You are certain that she will never rise?” I asked

“What we interrupted was not just a summoning, but also a binding.” He said. “They were trying to summon her but also control her. They failed. Failed partly in the summoning, and completely in the binding. She escaped them and us. It was several days later that the final battle took place in the catacombs of Solitude where her remains had laid since her death. The battle was epic. That we survived at all is proof that she was defeated. She is finally at peace. The peace we all will eventually enjoy.”

 _I would gladly give you yours now if I could_ I thought. But anger quickly gave way to grief.

"I am a Priestess of Potema. I was a Priestess of Potema. I dedicated my entire adult life to the return of my Queen. What am I now? I am nothing without her."

"You are not nothing. You are most definitely something. You are young. You are strong. You are attractive, and intelligent, and skilled. That is not nothing"

 _You have no idea what I am._ I thought.

"My life has had one purpose since I was eight years old." I said. “What am I without that?”

"You are still a Priestess." he replied. 

“A Priestess of what?” I asked

“The answer to that question lies within you.” He said. “Give yourself sufficient time to search for it.”

I walked off. 

The vampire found me later as I was sitting by the bath, reviewing in my mind different ways to kill him. I watched her as she slowly walked up the steps, knowing what she had helped him do. She is nothing if not direct.

"My mother entombed me for seven-hundred years to keep me safe from my father. When Aric released me, the world was completely changed. Your world has just completely changed, but at least you were spared the seven-hundred years."

Now at least I know his name.

“You were there with him, when he ended my Queen’s rebirth.” I said it as an accusation rather than a question.

“Yes.” She said it as a plain fact, as if I had asked her if she was right-handed. Did I expect guilt from a vampire?

“What will I find if I return there?” I asked her

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“What did you do to them?” I asked my anger rising. I had never considered them to be family. Only Railius had been that. But I had known them for most of my life, and the thought of them as night walkers horrified me.

“I understand now.” She said. “In answer to your first question, I will tell you that you will not find a den of vampires wearing the faces of your former colleagues. Not by my actions. That I participated in their deaths I freely admit. I have done much worse, for much less cause, In my life, but not on that day. Death came quickly, and permanently, to anyone who stood against us.” 

“I appreciate your honesty.” I said.

“It may occur sometime hence that you feel that you owe someone an answer for what occurred on that day. In that event, I beg the honor of being that someone.” She said, as if she was asking a great favor of me. “He would not hesitate to kill you if it were necessary, but it would haunt him afterwards. He is powerful. Too powerful in some ways. But he can also be fragile. He would take your death as a failing on his part, a sin for which he must atone. It would put him into a melancholy that pains me to watch. I would kill you and feel nothing afterwards.”

Sara was next.

"My father just told us. I'm sorry about your queen, and your friends. My father would not have done it if it had not been necessary. You don't know him, so you don't believe that, but it's true."

She was correct, I did not believe it. But there was nothing to say, so I said nothing.

“You have lost so much recently.” She said. “I cannot imagine what it is to lose your entire family.” She sat on the topmost step and placed a hand on my ankle as I lay by the bath. She seems to value physical contact highly. What is she studying if not Restoration?

“Is there anything I can do, anything we can do?” she asked “We could light lamps for them. We could make a small shrine here, and we could say prayers for them. All of us. You are a Priestess; you could tell us what to say.”

The contrast between Serana and Sara was enough to make my head spin. 

“You are very kind. My mind is too filled with grief and confusion to contemplate anything else.” I answered. 

"We are going home, to Solitude. Your queen’s remains are interred there. You could come with us, and visit her once we get there, to say goodbye to her and your friends. Please come. You could stay at our home. We have room. Samuel would like it. We all would."

I have no idea what I am feeling. Live in the house of the man who ended my queen? I do not know what to think, or what to believe.

There was no point continuing my journey to Darklight Tower. Potema's rebirth is ended. Mother Catilia is almost certainly dead, and the mission she gave me suffered the same fate. Did I even have a home to go back to? Do I have any earthly belongings that are not here scattered in and around this shack? Where else would I go, and what would I do once I got there?

In the end, it is better to have a destination, even for the short term, than to have nothing. A trip to Solitude, the Rites of Passage, this time for my queen and, in some ways, for myself. After that is another problem for another time.

“If Your father agrees to what you suggest I will accept your invitation.” I said.

Her smile returned. “He already has.” She said.


	4. How could anyone stand?

**28th of Morning Star**

I packed everything that I did not want to abandon, and we were off through Haemar's Pass towards Helgen, back the way Railius and I had come. Riding double with Samuel. He is so nervous being this close to me it would have been comical if I had not spent most of the ride plotting to kill his father. The novelty wore off eventually, which was a good thing because I had not slept well. I have no idea how long I had been asleep when I woke to realize I was nuzzled in the crook of his arm which he had made into a sort of nest. When I stirred and sat up, he reverted to his no-contact rule, but I could tell he was sitting easier. When we stopped briefly for a quick meal and a call of nature, I thanked him. 

"I am honored to help milady.” He said.

He smiled and gave his attention to checking his saddle girth, and I could tell that he would not want for attention when he was grown. 

When it was time to resume our journey, he got up into the saddle first and helped me as I placed my foot into the stirrup. My wounds were healing well, but even with his help I still felt twinges.

We were riding single file, Aric in front, Serana riding last, Sara riding ahead of us. I missed Railius and our combination of friendly banter and comfortable silence. My emotions were still raw, and I needed a distraction if I was to avoid breaking down again.

“May I ask you a question?” I asked him.

“Certainly milady.” He answered.

Milady. Gods help me.

“You seem young for a warrior.” I said. I could almost feel him smiling as he sat behind me.

“That is a statement, milady, not a question.” He answered, the smile clear in his voice.

“You seem young for a magistrate as well.” I said, my own smile growing. “How old are you?” I asked.

“Seventeen years milady.” He answered.

“You do not need to call me milady.” I said. “My name is Noxaura.”

“You are a Priestess. You are under my protection. You are my elder. I owe you all deference.” He said “milady.”

“As you will young sir.” I said. “How long have you trained as a warrior?” I asked him.

“I started training when I was seven.” He said

“Seven? Who would train a boy so young?” I asked

“My Father and Mother were my primary teacher. He is the finest warrior with sword or Warhammer in Tamriel.”

“Are your brothers also warriors?” I asked.

“My brothers are younger than I am, and not yet ready. Two of my sisters are warriors, Rangers, trained in sword, mace, shield, and bow. They are twins.” He said.

“Your father trains all his children?” I asked

“Yes, though he also hires others to provide us specialized training. He trains Sara and my other sisters as well. Sara also trained at the College in Winterhold. My sister Delphine is training there now. For musical training we attend classes at the Bard College.”

“Your father values education I see.” I said. Music lessons. Specialized training. The College of Winterhold. So many children. What kind of family is this?

“He expects us to be ‘well rounded citizens’.” He replied

“Did none of you ever consider the religious life?” I asked him

“I considered a priesthood. I still consider it. And my brother Alesan wishes to be a monk. My brother Blaise wishes to be a Bard” he said.

“You still consider the priesthood?” I asked him

“Yes. Is there such a thing as a warrior priest?” he asked.

“If you chose that as your calling, then the answer to your question is ‘yes’.” I answered him. “You will fare much better than I did as a warrior Priestess.” I said.

“You fared well enough.” He said “You are alive, and they are dead. That is the mark of success for any warrior.”

“You are very kind.” I said. “You would be an excellent priest.”

“Thank you.” He said, then “milady.”

Sara turned around at the sound of my laughter.

* * *

The day was growing late when Aric made the decision that we would stop rather than continue to Helgen.

“We are well equipped. It will be a comfortable camp.” He said.

“Do not worry on my account, sir.” I said. “Railius and I shared many a camp on our journey.” Just saying his name made me sad.

“I meant no disrespect, lady.” He replied. “You are still recovering from serious injuries. That was foremost in my mind. Please take extra care.”

“You are too kind sir.” I said, my plans of murder temporarily deserting me.

We made camp a safe distance from a Stormcloak camp we passed a short time earlier. Sara and Samuel made a competition of setting up tents, both displaying skill well past their years. Aric cared for the horses, spending time with each and speaking softly to them. 

_Can this be the same man who defeated the Wolf Queen and killed my brethren?_ I thought

“You are lost in thought.” Sara said.

Serana was nowhere in sight. The last I recalled seeing her was when she dismounted. I imagined the Stormcloak camp nearby and fought the shudder that was building inside me. Samuel was seeing to the fire, and dinner. Sara and I were alone by our tent.

“Your father takes great care of the horses. He shows them great tenderness.” I said. “Serana mentioned earlier that he could be fragile. I did not understand it at the time, but perhaps this is what she meant.”

It was the wrong thing to say. I knew it immediately by the look on her face. I had forgotten how young she really was until her eyes became damp. 

It was my turn to hug her. “I am sorry. I had not meant to upset you. I thought it a harmless comment, but obviously I was mistaken.”

“It is not your fault.” She said, wiping her eyes. “It was difficult to watch, and it was recent. My heart is still broken from it.”

“Sweet child.” I said, smoothing her hair. “What distresses you?”

“It was a bandit attack.” She said after a moment “We garner more than our share, seeming by all appearances to be an easy target; a Father traveling with his two children. These bandits sent four men to attack us while three archers stayed behind cover. I will spare you the details of the battle, but it was brief. It was afterwards while Father and Samuel were cleaning weapons that we heard it. Crying. It was one of the bandits. He was younger than I am, and he knew he was dying. There was nothing anyone could do, not even Father. He was crying ‘Mama. Mama.’” She began to cry in earnest then. “My father knelt beside him. ‘what is your name lad?’ he asked him. Caedal was his name. ‘Caedal, I am here. I will not leave you. My father said. ‘I want to go home.’ Caedal said. And then he died.”

She was quiet for a few moments. “My father knelt there with him for some time. He was crying, I could tell. Caedal was one of the bandits my father had struck down. There were other bandits almost as young, but this was the bandit that had cried for his mother. When he finally stood, he walked like a false step would shatter him. He walked to where Serana stood and spoke to her and then stood by his horse talking softly to her while Serana raised two of the dead bandits to dig a grave for Caedal. We tried to convince him afterwards that it was not his fault. He did not make them bandits. He did not invite their attack. But it was like he was deaf to our words. My sister Lucia reminds him regularly that not all the sins in the world rest on his shoulders, but he does not seem to hear. Seeing him like that was almost more than I could bear. I should have gone to comfort him, but I just stood there, like a fence post in the wilderness. Useless.” Another moment of pause and a shuddered breath. “That is what Serana meant.”

“Child, I beg your pardon most earnestly. I had no idea the affect my words would have on you. I regret the pain I have caused you.”

She returned my hug, finding many of my wounds again; but again, I did not care.

“I know you meant no harm.” She said. “You do not know him. You have not seen him in battle. You have not seen him care for a fawn whose mother has been killed. I am his daughter, and I do not yet know the limits of his power or his compassion. Very few know him to his depth. Those that do are blessed, as I am blessed to have him for my father.”

I clearly did not know him, not even slightly. Not the man she described. The man who would kneel by a dead bandit and shed tears could not be the man that I am planning to murder, the man that took my Queen and my brothers and sisters from me.

Sara and I sat together while we ate our meal, sharing our recently formed bond. The family talked about unimportant things. When it was time to retire Sara insisted on brushing my hair before we crawled into our tent and our bedrolls.

Serana had still not returned.

* * *

We arrived at Helgen well before midday and turned north. Serana had rejoined us as Sara and Samuel were reversing their competition and taking down and packing the tents. No one asked her where she had been. 

Helgen was a beehive of activity, reconstruction progressing at an impressive rate. We stopped only briefly for Aric, Sara, and Samuel to pay their respects to a family acquaintance and purchase supplies. Serana and I stretched our legs. 

“You seem easier in your mind this morning.” She said.

“Somewhat.” I answered. “I am still likely to fly between grief and anger, but I begin to find a middle ground of general anxiety when I contemplate my place in this changed landscape.”

“I am well acquainted with the view from the edge of that cliff.” She said. 

* * *

Heading through the pass from Ivarstead to Helgen we had not seen a soul. Not unusual, since the elevation brings driving snow and biting winds. Turning west to continue to Rorikstead the road was busier. Several times we were observed by small groups of men and women that seemed to be discussing how easy a target we were. Sara was correct: at first glance we should have been a prime target for attack. Youngsters, and one of our horses carrying double. But we passed unmolested.

I was not as familiar with this region as I was with those farther north, but they obviously were, and as we traveled further towards Rorikstead they were becoming more tense. I was about to ask when Aric signaled to stop and dismount. He came and helped Samuel hand me down and said, "Come with me" and took me down the road a small distance until he could point out a small outpost crossing the road.

"Bandits" he said. "It's not always manned. It is now. It is an obligation all holds share, to clear bandit nests like this one. We clear them and destroy the outpost. The smarter bandits do not rebuild them. These are not the smarter bandits. There are only six. Sara will stay here with you and the horses. It will not take long."

I felt the need to inflict pain on something. My something of preference was him. But these bandits would do.

"I can help" I said.

"You could accomplish it on your own were you fully healed; I have no doubt. But you were seriously injured and sick recently. And there could be more of them waiting for us to attack the compound so they could take the horses. I would be indebted to you if you would stay here with Sara. Protect each other and the horses if the outpost is a diversion."

I agreed, praying to my dead queen that they would attack us.

It was over quickly. A short burst of noise, some screams that I would prefer not to remember, and six dead bandits on a funeral pyre that had recently been their outpost. Walking back from the fire to the horses the vampire was the happiest I had seen her. A shudder went through me and I focused hard on the Prayer of Faith to avoid thinking about what had made her so happy, and the screams I had heard. A short time to clean weapons and armor and we were back on our journey, giving the fire a wide birth. I watched it before it became a strain on my neck. “Look at it burn.” I thought. It looked like it would burn forever, burn a hole in the earth. I had seen him start it. I did not know he knew destruction magic. He certainly does not dress like a mage. But that fire was so intense I expected it to burn the rock as well. 

* * *

We made camp off the main road, finding an idyllic spot near the lake. The usual competition to erect tents occurred, the less raucous tasks completed. Aric had produced a fishing rod from somewhere and we enjoyed fried fish for our dinner. We had stopped earlier than usual, and Serana had not yet disappeared as was her custom when It became dark. I took the opportunity when conversation lagged to ask a question that had been on my mind for some time.

“May I ask a question?” I asked

“Certainly.” Aric answered.

“The recovering Hagraven?” I asked

"Morryn." Sara answered

"Would someone please explain that to me?" I asked

"Morryn was a mage and alchemist living in Eastmarch.” Serana began "She was a normal woman, living a normal life. But she wanted more than to be just an unimportant, undistinguished mage, mixing potions to cure stomach aches. She began to experiment with stronger potions, stronger magics. She discovered a manuscript somewhere that described elixirs and poisons that required mastery and power that she did not yet possess. She met someone who convinced her that she could give Morryn what she sought. She neglected to mention how. Morryn realized too late the cost of her desire. By then the ritual to turn her into a Hagraven was complete. She had the power she had sought. All it cost her was her humanity. She killed the woman who had tricked her and fled.”

“But she had no home to return to.” Sara said “She terrified anyone who saw her. She was still mostly Morryn, but she felt herself changing. Father, Serana, Sophie and Collette found her half-starved in the wilderness near Windhelm. She was fortunate that day. They brought her to a small shack on the eastern bank of the White River. They fed her, made repairs to the shack, and gave her enough supplies so that she would comfortable, but Father did not know how to reverse the ritual.”

“But her description of the ritual, and her description of how it was continuing to affect and change her was similar to a totem curse.” Serana said.

“What is a totem curse?” I asked

“A totem can be any object combined with something from the target of the curse, usually hair or fingernails. It requires a witch or mage of some knowledge and power to infuse the object with the energy required for it to work as a totem. Once the totem is completed then the witch places a curse on the totem and the curse is delivered to the target.” She answered.

“In Morryn’s case, the totem was a dead bird.” Sara said. “The woman took some of Morryn’s hair and used it and the bird and created a totem, and then cursed the totem. That is how she became a Hagraven.”

“Neither of us knew how to lift a totem curse, but Aric had the idea to simply try the same ritual with one change. Once the totem was completed it would be blessed instead of cursed.” Serana said. “luckily, we were near Kynesgrove, which at that time had a Priestess of Kynareth making a pilgrimage to a sacred forest nearby.”

“Sophie went to Kynesgrove and brought her to the shack. She agreed to help. Sophie brought down a bird with her bow. The Priestess was more than powerful enough to create the totem. Once it was ready, she blessed it in the name of Kyne. Blessed it three times, she said, because things summoned three times are very powerful.”

“And it worked.” Serana said. “Morryn began to regain her humanity.”

“She is almost completely cured.” Sara said, “But she retained the power she had gained.”

“And some feathers.” Serana added.

“That is an amazing story.” I said. “What became of Morryn?” I asked.

“The curse was lifted, the ritual was reversed, but it would take some time for her to fully regain her humanity. And she continued to suffer from the effects of the trauma she endured. She had nightmares frequently. Certain smells would affect her, as would certain sounds.” Aric said. “We brought her to Markath. The Priestesses in the temple of Dibella are skilled in treating trauma. They helped her greatly. Morryn is still there. She continues to visit the temple. They continue to guide her through her trauma, but also to help her to understand and control the power that she gained.”

“And they collect the feathers she sheds.” Sara said with a smile.

Evening arrived, stars appeared, and Serana departed. It was a restful time, the crackling of the fire, the comfortable purring sounds from the horses, and the slow, steady sound of Aric and Samuel sharpening their swords. Sara and I had made a nest of furs against a log. The hairbrush eventually appeared, and she talked about the college in Winterhold, about missing her sisters, about where she may live when she ‘is old enough’. I realized suddenly that I have never heard Samuel or Sara speak of their mother, or Aric speak of a wife. Could Serana be his wife? I see how she looks at him. I am not an innocent. I know that look well enough. But could a vampire be his wife? Could a vampire be their mother? My curiosity was piqued, but my recent misstep with Sara made me cautious about what questions I asked.

“Here.” I said, “give me the hairbrush, and I will brush your hair.”

* * *

“I tried to keep the count of his children, but I wandered off the path.” Railius said.

“It is surely no less than nine.” I said.

“That’s a lot of children.” He said.

“And no mention of a mother or wife.” I said.

“Nine children is more than most women can bear safely.” He replied

“Sara and Samuel do not closely resemble each other.” I said

“Different mothers, possibly.” Railius said. “He’s got your interest I see.”

“I do not understand him.” I said. “Who is this man whose painful demise I am plotting? The longer I spend with this family the less sure I am of the answer.”

“You aren’t any murder, lass, you have too kind a heart.” He said. “You are just grieving is all. You are in pain and looking for someone to blame.”

“If he is not to blame who is?” I asked, “It was he who ended my Queen’s rebirth, and took the lives of my brethren.”

“It was his hand surely.” Railius said. 

“Then why does my anger towards him diminish?” I asked, “Why am I now ambivalent?”

“Because you begin to understand that he is also not a murdered either.” He answered.

“He rescues orphaned fawns. He saves Hagravens. He saved me.” I said.

“That he did.” He replied

“He mourned a dead bandit who cried for his mother.” I said

“He’s a father. He has children that age. It’s easy to look at a boy like that and see your own kin.” He said. “I know that well enough.”

“His daughter speaks of him as almost a deity.” I said. “His son does also. They are at least partly correct. He is a powerful healer.”

“Give yourself time lass. This is a question with no need of a quick answer.”

“Time, it seems, is something I have in abundance.” I answered.

* * *

“What are they doing?” I asked Samuel.

The days of our journey began to blend together. Samuel had lost any trace of awkwardness in sharing his saddle with me, and our silences began to resemble the comfortable variety I had shared with Railius. Samuel’s ‘Milady’s’ and my ‘young sir’s’ became much less frequent.

It was nearing midday when I saw them. Two wolves. Yearlings, or a bit older. 

“They do not appear to be doing anything.” Samuel said.

“That is my point.” I said. “They are standing there just off the side of the road. They do not attack; they do not flee. Every wolf I have ever seen on my journey’s with Railius has done one or the other. These seem not the least concerned by our presence. They treat us with disinterest.”

“Wolves are common about these parts.” Samuel said. “We will continue to encounter them, usually in pairs like these two.”

“But their behavior. Do you not find it odd?” I asked

“I cannot say that I do.” He answered. “Father, Sara, and I see wolves regularly. More so and closer at hand when we travel off the roads, which we do quite often. The horses do not like them. They investigate us but quickly loose interest, as these two seem to be doing.”

He was correct. The pair of wolves had chosen to lay down on their sunny patch of grass and enjoy the warming weather.

“It is the oddest behavior I have ever seen.” I said.

I mentioned the wolves to Aric during a rest stop.

“It is because we are together.” was all he said, “They will act very differently if you are alone.”

I was about to ask further when I heard a sound, a sound of rushing air combined with a sound like the snapping of a rug as it hung to dry in a strong breeze. Everyone else heard it and began to scan the sky.

It was to our left, and behind us. His roar as he announced himself was clear for anything with ears to hear, but still distant. The sound of his wings and the air rushing around them grew louder as he flew closer.

“Keep good hold of your horses.” Aric said.

“There is no concealment in sight.” I said. 

“He has seen us already.” Sara said. “They have excellent vision.”

“What can we do?” I asked

“Nothing.” Samuel said. “He will attack us, or he will not.”

The dragon continued to approach.

“Gods.” I said. “It is so big, even at this distance. 

“It is a frost dragon.” Samuel said. “They are larger than other species of dragon.”

Aric was by my side.

“If he attacks it is for me to deal with.” He said. “Listen to Samuel and do exactly what he says without hesitation. I will do what needs to be done.”

“You will not fight it alone.” I said it as a statement, not a question.

“I will.” He answered. “This is not our first encounter with a dragon. Trust my judgement in this.”

The dragon had doubled in size in just the time we had been talking. I had never seen anything as large as it that was not made from brick and stone. I did not expect emotion from a vampire, and she showed none; but I was surprised at the calm seriousness on the faces of Sara and Samuel. If my face did not display outright terror, then my shaking legs must certainly have.

“Stay with us no matter what happens, no matter what you see or hear.” Sara said. “Samuel and I will not let anything happen to you, and Serana will protect the three of us, but only if you stay with us.”

Aric unfastened his war hammer from his saddle and walked away from us and toward the approaching behemoth.

“I understand.” I answered.

The dragon would be upon us in a moment.

Its roar was deafening as it flew over us. I instinctively covered my ears. Thought was not possible. Sara and Samuel did not let go of their horses. Serana had her horse and Aric’s. The horses were not happy but did not bolt. I had thought a moment earlier that I could not be more terrified. I was mistaken.

Aric returned and stored his war hammer behind his saddle as the dragon continued on its way, is size dwindling as the distance grew.

“It appears that we are not an interesting enough target.” Aric said calmly.

“You will forgive me, but I believe I need to sit and rest for a moment.” I said, as my legs began to fail me.

He had scooped me up before I knew. “You have had a shock. It is understandable.” He said as his eyes found mine and he smiled slightly, his eyes bright and his arms strong. We had never been this close before, and my heart responded accordingly, his effect on me unchanged. “We are all due a rest after that excitement.”

* * *

It was a makeshift camp, two tents and poles combined into an awning that was just large enough to provide shade for all of us. A quick meal of wine bread and cheese.

“You all appeared so calm.” I said, a portion of my composure restored by a cup of wine. “You are both so young.” I said to Sara and Samuel. “And yet Your father tells me you have encountered dragons before.”

“More than once.” Samuel said sitting taller and pulling his shoulders back. “Father thinks we are still too young to assist him in driving them off or killing them. We disagree.”

“You disagree.” Sara said. “My opinion is somewhat different.”

“I think it because it is true.” Aric said. “Do not be so quick to wish to fight a dragon, son of mine. Your wish will be granted one day, and on that day, you will regret that you did not wish for something else.”

“You have killed dragons without any assistance.” I said, a statement in place of a question again.

“Yes. Fewer now, with Alduin defeated, and dragon attacks less frequent.

 _Who is Alduin?_ I thought.

“How many?” I asked.

“Too many.” He said, staring into his cup.

It was too alien an idea for my head to encompass. How could one man drive off something so immense, let alone kill it. It was too much to be believed.

“My first encounter with a dragon was much worse.” Sara said with a laugh.

“It would have gone better for both of us if you had done as I had asked.” Aric said as he looked up and at his young daughter.

“I thought it was going to kill you.” Sara said.

“What happened?” I asked

“Unless you wish to camp her for the night it is a story for another time.” Aric said. “But I promise if you wish it you will hear it in its entirety.”

“I will hold you to that promise sir.” I said.

Samuel pack our shelter and supplies and we resumed our Journey.

* * *

It was a quiet evening camp. It seemed the dragon encounter had robbed all of us of energy. Except Serana. She disappeared as usual.

“Where does she go?” I asked Sara.

“I have learned to neither ask about it, nor think about it.” She said. 

“That is very wise.” I answered.

“She is what she is.” Aric said. “None of us know what she has endured in her long life, not even I. She has told me much, but not all. I am not qualified to judge her, and I do not have the right in any case.”

“I do not wish to pass judgement on her, or anyone.” I said, not being entirely honest since I had passed judgement on him some time ago. “I was only curious.”

“She would tell you if you asked her.” He replied. “Be sure you are prepared to hear the answer before asking.”

“She mentioned the lengths her mother took to protect her from her father.” I said.

“Yes, and her mother paid dearly for it.” He replied.

“She travels freely, making no attempt to conceal herself, so she seems to be in little danger now.” I said.

“That is because her father is dead.” He replied

“And her mother?” I asked

“Her mother has returned to her study in their family home and resumed her research. She is a gifted Alchemist.” He said.

An entire family of vampires. I was not sure what to make of that.

A giant yawn escaped me. It seemed to be contagious since Sara copied me moments later.

“The two of you should retire.” Aric said. “Samuel will see to the fire and I will visit the horses. It has been a long day and we should all rest well.”

“I will happily crawl into my bedroll and go to sleep immediately.” Sara said. “Right after I brush Noxaura’s hair.”

We stopped in Rorikstead mid morning to rest and purchase supplies. Aric spoke briefly to the alderman who came out to meet him. Our stay was short, and we continued our journey. The road turned more north running parallel the river and its series of waterfalls. I had learned my lesson the previous day and swore I would never again accuse the days of our journey of becoming mundane. I mentioned this to Samuel, and he laughed.

“Yes, the Divines have either a sense of humor, or a sense of irony when they wish to teach us a lesson on perspective.” He said

“You sound as if you are a priest already.” I said

“It is very kind of you to say milady.” He said

“Are we not past ‘milady’?” I asked

“I would say that it is well to our rear, yet still visible with good eyesight and favorable lighting.” He said

It was my turn to laugh now. “Do they also teach jesting at the Bard College?” I asked.

“I am not sure.” He answered with a chuckle of his own. “I will ask.”

* * *

“Will I finally be allowed to hear the story I was promised?” I asked that evening.

Sara rested her head in her hands and made a groaning noise as Samuel smiled and said, “A promise was made, and it should be kept.”

“Bear in mind that it was several years ago, and I have matured and learned much in that time.” Sara said, preempting her defense.

“I will remember.” I said.

“As Sara said, it was several years ago.” Aric started. “She had already had considerable training, but she had not yet attended the College in Winterhold.” He paused for a moment. “It was not meant as an adventure, not like Lucia’s first adventure. We had only meant to visit the statue of Merid-Nunda.”

Merid-Nunda. No one has called Meridia that in hundreds of years.

“Father told us stories of it, and I wanted to see it for myself.” Sara added.

“It is not too far west of Solitude; we could be there and back again before dark. Aric continued. “I requested the loan of four guardsman to deter bandits. We had turned north onto the road that led to the statue.”

He was describing it as if It was unfamiliar to me, but he knew better. His eyes met mine at that moment. The road north they had turned onto lead almost to the entrance of Wolfskull cave, where my brothers and sisters had died. Where he had killed them.

“It was upon us without warning. It had been sleeping nearby, hidden from our view by a small hill.” He said. “We had just dismounted and were preparing to walk up the steps to the statue when it lifted off. It came into view and immediately dove to attack.”

Samuel was no longer smiling. He must have heard this story many times, and still his look was serious. Sara was quiet sitting next to me, her arms wrapped around her knees.

“I ordered the guards to protect Sara with their lives and to retreat down the road as I drew my Warhammer and charged the dragon.” Aric said.

I realized that I was clasping my hands together so hard that they were growing numb.

“Dragons do not like to be challenged.” Samuel said. “Charging a dragon will always draw his attention.”

“That was my intention. It gave the guards time to move Sara away and hide in the cover of the statue.” Aric said.

“I was hysterical.” Sara said. “I was crying so hard I could not speak. I could only scream ‘Papa’ and ‘No’ over and over.”

“Fighting a dragon is difficult.” Aric said

“That must certainly be the greatest understatement in the last four eras.” I said

He smiled. “You must avoid it’s head or it will surely kill you with its breath.

“This one breathed fire.” Sara said.

“You must avoid its tail, or it will dash you to pieces with it.” Aric continued. “Its wings can produce a wind that can hurl you a great distance, or they can strike you hard enough to stun you. Constant motion is critical. Unpredictable motion.”

“And an enchanted Warhammer.” Samuel said. 

“It is a dance that I know well, having lived long enough to learn it.” Aric said looking at Samuel to make his point. “So, it was dodge and strike, and dodge and strike. My blows were taking a toll; a war hammer is a fearsome weapon, even against something as large as a dragon, and I was wielding it with all my strength to stop it from taking flight and attacking Sara.”

“But I did not know that.” Sara said. “I thought I was about to lose my father. There began to be a pressure building inside me. I broke away from the guard that was holding me. I was only wearing robes. He was armored and could not keep up. I ran back up the road as the pressure inside me grew.”

“I was certain that the dragon was spent. I was mistaken, and careless.” Aric said, again with a look to Samuel. “His tail struck me squarely. If he had been stronger, he would have killed me, but his blow was more than enough to knock me down.”

“That was when I saw them.” Sara said. “That was when the pressure inside me burst forth.”

“I was lying on my back, looking up at the dragon when the lightening started.” Aric said “I could see it forming. I could see the bolts as they started to strike all around the dragon.”

“It was not something I had intended. I thought I was watching my father die. I did not cast a spell.” Sara said. “I was not in control of myself. All I remember is screaming as loud as I have ever screamed.”

“But Father was too close.” Samuel said. “The lightening was striking where he was laying.

“It was an impressive lightning storm.” Aric said. “I had only a moment to roll over and cover myself with my cloak. It was chaos after that. Barely enough air to draw breath. It seemed to last forever, but in reality, it was quite short, ten seconds at most. When it was over, and I emerged from under my cloak, the dragon was dead.”

“I was still crying so hard I couldn’t speak.” Sara said.

“She gave me a hug that nearly squeezed the life from me.” Aric said, smiling at his daughter.

“It is amazing you were not struck.” I said.

“He was struck.” Samuel said, “several times.”

“Yet you survived.” I said astonished. 

“He was wearing a very special cloak.” Sara said.

“It is this cloak.” Aric said, adjusting the cloak he was wearing.

“It is enchanted.” I said

“Very much so.” He replied. 

“And afterwards” Sara began

“And afterwards” Aric interrupted her “We decided we had had enough excitement for one day and left the visit to the statue for another time.”

“So, you see that my first experience with a dragon could have gone better.” Sara said.

“It was a colossal blunder on my part. Meridia protected us that day.” Aric said. “Otherwise we would not have been so fortunate.”

“I had not realized that Daedra watch over men.” I said.

“Not all men.” Samuel said.

A look past between Father and children that stopped further conversation.

“it is a lesson that even I continue to learn.” Aric said to his children. “Dragons are not to be sought out. They are not a test of strength or courage. And they have flown in these skies before man existed. They deserve your respect. Do not treat them as prey. You are the prey, not they.”

“Yes Father.” Samuel said.

Aric looked at Sara.

“Why do you look to me for an answer?” She asked, “You know full well I shall die happy if I never see another dragon.”

“I know.” He said, kissing the top of her head. “but you ease my mind by reminding me.”

“I am entirely of your mind.” I said to Sara. “Once was certainly enough.”

“Unless you are Lucia.” Samuel said.

“Lucia is your sister?” I asked him.

“Yes. She is oldest.” He answered.

“That is a story for another time.” Aric said. “Noxaura will surely grow bored with our company if she hears all our family’s stories at once.”

“There are several words I might use to describe this family.” I said, “but boring will never be one of them.”

* * *

“We were there in the cave the day of the attack.” I said to Railius. “We were surely there.”

“It seems likely.” He answered

We were in the wilderness near my borrowed shack. The afternoon was warm as we lay on the grass in the shade of a large tree.

“But for chance, we may have met them.” I said

“But for chance, we may have been killed by a dragon.” Railius said.

“It was terrifying watching it approach. The sound it made drove all thought from my mind.” I said. “I cannot imagine fighting one. He fought one alone. He has fought them before and killed them.”

“It is the stuff of the old legends, however light he makes it sound.” Railius said. “He doesn’t make much of it at all.”

“But we have not yet heard the whole tale.” I said. “Twice he stopped the children from speaking. Did you notice?” It was a silly question to ask a phantasm that only existed in my dreams.

“I agree that this song is still half sung.” He answered. “I know that anyone or anything that threatens his children will be sent to Oblivion before they know what is happening.”

“I cannot blot the vision from my mind, the memory of him calmly walking towards the dragon as it approached us on the road.” I said. “My legs were shaking so that if it came to running, I would have fallen; but he walked as if he were on a morning stroll.”

“That was your first dragon.” Railius reminded me. “Don’t compare yourself to him.”

“Samuel would do well to heed his father’s advice.” I said. “It blotted out the sun. My mind still cannot accept what my eyes saw. Only a madman would wish to encounter one up close, let alone fight one.”

“That war hammer doesn’t look pleasant. I would not want to be on the wrong end of that when he was swinging it.” Railius said.

“How could anyone stand against a man who could do that?” I asked. “Potema herself could not. What chance did my brethren have? Their deaths were written once he stepped into that cave.”

“You don’t know that lass.” He said. “He said himself they didn’t search afterwards. There may well be survivors.”

“Would we have survived, do you think?” I asked him “Would we have survived if we had been there?”

“I would have thrown you over my shoulder and run us to safety.” He said. “I would never have let you sacrifice your life for Catilia. Not for her and not for the Queen she worshiped.”

“She was my queen as well.” I reminded him. “And you said yourself that you do not run as well as you used to.”

“Allow a dead man a fantasy or two, lass.” He said. “In my mind I see myself carrying you to safety through fire and frost, my sword deflecting all blows.”

“You are my tower of strength. You have been since I met you.” I said. “But I would have wished to stay and defend my queen.”

“Potema was not your queen.” He said “Pevel was not a Priestess of Potema. You were pledged to Cybele. It is Catilia I blame. She was never right in the head.”

“She was devout.” I said. “Whatever else she was.”

“That don’t excuse what she did to you.” He answered.

“I had thought I understood the world or, at least, my place in it.” I said. “I believed I would see Potema’s rebirth. I believed I was one of the chosen few. Then I believed it was my place to avenge my queen and my brethren. Is anything I have ever believed true?”

“I can’t answer that lass.” He said.

“I thought spirits could answer all questions.” I said playfully.

“I’m not a spirit.” He reminded me with a grin. “I’m a figment of your sleeping imagination.”

“I am mistaken in that as well then.” I said. “I seem to have been mistaken about a whole list of things.”

“The list does seem to grow long.” He said, his beautiful face smiling at me. “Perhaps we should start to write it down?”


	5. By the Gods, who is he?

**3rd of Sun's Dawn**

We have finally arrived at Dragon's Bridge, the final stop in our journey before Solitude, and something is not right. Everyone in the Inn is on edge. There are Thalmor everywhere. Even Serana seems anxious. 

“Things were unsettled when Railius and I were here last, but not like this.” I said

“Were there this many Thalmor here Then?” Aric asked.

“There were no Thalmor here then.” I said. “There were many more strangers than usual, but they were all either brigands or poor warriors. Railius did not like their look. We assumed that the bandits that followed and attacked us started following us here.”

“If so, they followed you a very long way.” Aric said.

“This is larger and more overt than anything we have encountered before.” Sara said. 

“The White-Gold Concordat only gives them rights in Skyrim to seek out Talos worship. How can they justify this number of troops?” Samuel asked

“You have encountered Thalmor solders before?” I asked

“Yes.” Aric answered. “They have been very active.”

“Secret outposts in Eastmarch and Haafingar.” Serana said. “They erected a checkpoint at the crossing into Cyrodiil and searched anyone who attempted to pass.”

“They activities on the roads have significantly increased.” Aric said. “It is not only those suspected of Talos worship, but now they are detaining elves, including Altmer.”

“And they are keeping an eye on Imperial troops. Two of their outposts were positioned to observe Imperial camps without being observed.” Sara said.

“You seem familiar with their activities.” I said.

“We have been investigating their activities for several weeks.” Aric said.

“Investigating?” I asked.

“Our investigations led to the destruction of two of their secret outposts and their Cyrodiil checkpoint.” Serana said.

“Do I interpret your use of the word ‘destruction’ correctly?” I asked

“If you interpret it to mean that we killed every Thalmor we discovered then yes, you interpret correctly.” Serana replied.

“We found evidence that they were searching for an Altmer mage, as well as evidence of a plot in the Summerset Isles.” Sara said.

“This number of soldiers seems excessive for one mage.” I said.

“It is possible that they have expanded their list of fugitives.” Aric said.

“You believe they are searching for those that destroyed their outposts and killed their soldiers.” Serana said.

“It is possible, but for this number of soldiers to be in Dragon’s Bridge it would mean that they believe their fugitives to be here.” He answered.

“On this day at least, they are correct.” Serana said.

“No.” he answered. “Something else is occurring here, and I mean to uncover what it is.”

“What can we do?” Samuel asked. 

“Are you comfortable riding straight through to Solitude and informing the Jarl of what we have discovered?” Aric asked him.

I could have predicted his reaction having known him only a fraction as well as I did. His back straightened, his shoulders went back.

“I will not stop until the message is delivered. Nothing will prevent me.” He said.

“You will be alone.” His Father reminded him. “The Thalmor are out in force. Remember my lessons on dragons. This is a dragon of a different sort. Use your wits before your sword.”

“I understand.” Samuel answered.

Aric turned to me. “This is a nest we disturbed. It is for us to investigate. Take Sara’s horse and ride to the Blue Palace with Samuel. You may account for yourself however you chose. But I will vouch for you if you simply say you are a Priestess instructing Samuel in divinity. Stay in my home in Solitude with Samuel until we return.”

It was in that moment that I understood what Sara described. I began to sense an up-welling of grief and pain looking for release. If this investigation ended as their past ones did then my outlet was here.

“I will do no such thing.” I said. “Skyrim is my home as much as yours. If we are being invaded by Thalmor I have as much right to investigate and resist as you do.”

Aric looked at me for a moment before turning to Samuel.

“Purchase your supper for the road.” Aric said to him.

* * *

“Be careful young sir.” I said to him at our parting. “I lose my saddle mate only for the moment. I expect to see you healthy once we are reunited in Solitude.”

I could see the infatuation beginning in his face. At his age it was to be expected. “Milady.” He said. “I will take great care, not wishing to miss our reunion.”

“He is an exceptional young man.” I said as he rode away. 

“He certainly is.” Aric said.

“Your children do you credit.” I said, quoting Railius. “Your love for them is plain to anyone with eyes and ears.”

“He is the eldest of my sons.” Aric said. “And as such he believes he has a reputation to uphold.”

“Your reputation?” I asked.

“Dear Gods, I hope not.” He answered.

* * *

“She is in her element now.” Aric said. “Rest assured, she is in no danger. She will be invisible to them, and she will do nothing to alert anyone to her presence.”

Darkness had fallen an hour earlier, just as Serana had stood up and left the Inn. We were now a party of three. 

“The Inn is almost full, but almost silent.” I said. “everyone keeps to himself. No one looks around. Conversations are hushed.”

“Better for us if no one looks around.” Aric said.

“Father is known in Haafingar.” Sara said. “It is better if he is not recognized.”

“Better if none of us are recognized.” Aric said.

“They do not know me.” I said. “I am entirely nondescript.” I said.

“You are a beautiful woman.” Aric said. “That is the very opposite of nondescript.”

I could feel my face growing hot and my heart quicken.

“You flatter me sir.” I said.

“In this case, madam, it is a simple statement of fact.” He said. “I do certainly compliment you on your beauty, but truth is not flattery.”

It is not right that I should react this way to his compliments. He is certainly beautiful in his own right, but my recent plans to murder him should have afforded me some protection. Why do I blush like a maid?

“In that case, sir, I thank you for your truth.” I said

Ours was not the only table whose occupants sat with cloaks and hoods shrouding their identities.

“The Imperial troops keep to their barracks.” Sara said. “There is not one Imperial solider here.”

“Few Thalmor as well.” Aric said, “That they do not take their leisure is not a good sign.”

We sat in our corner of the Inn until Serana returned a short time later.

“Their activity is concentrated on a mine a short distance west of the main road.” She said. “It is on the south bank of the river.

“Mines dot the entire landscape.” Aric said. “What about this mine has their interest piqued?”

“It seems unremarkable.” Serana said. They have a guard at the entrance, but they do not patrol the road leading to it. They do not patrol the hills above it, or the wood on the opposite side of the river.

“They are trying not to draw attention to it.” Aric said.

“The Thalmor would not travel to Skyrim to work a mine, surely.” I said

“I agree.” Aric said. “Is there evidence of them removing ore from the mine?”

“No.” Serana said. No stocks of ore outside the mine, no equipment to move ore. They guard the entrance, that is all. Barely any touches. They earnestly wish their activity to be hidden.

“A large presence in the town center would distract from their activity in the mine and discourage villagers from venturing out.” Aric said.

“There are no patrols along the river leading to the entrance?” Aric asked

“None.” Serana answered. “But they have a guard posted at the gate that keeps watch in that direction. We cannot simply walk down the road. We will be seen.”

“Not if we are invisible.” Aric said.

* * *

“These look like the brigands that Railius and I saw the day we departed Dragon’s Bridge.” I said.

Aric’s spell kept the three of us invisible long enough for us to be hidden from the guard. Serana needed no spell of Aric’s to move unseen.

“You will reach a point in the road where it bends to the left around a large boulder.” Serana said. “To the right is a felled tree that spans the river. Stop there and wait. Stay behind the boulder or you will be seen.”

“Where will you be?” Sara asked.

“I will not be far from you.” Serana answered.

“How shall we signal you?” I asked

“You will not.” She said. “I will be watching you the entire time. I will wait for you to be in position before I act.”

“Act?” I asked.

“We cannot risk the guards calling an alarm.” She said. “They must be silenced quickly.”

“Silenced.” I said.

Serana looked at me with a cold gaze. “Once we begin to ford this river there is no turning back. We do not yet know its depths and currents. If you are not sure this path is for you, stay here.”

“I thank you for your advice, madam.” I said equally as cold. “If I may borrow your watery analogy, this is not the first river I have crossed. I only wish to understand you accurately so my assistance can be proportioned appropriately.”

“I thank your grace for the offer” she said, “but there are only four guards. It will be midnight. They have intentionally kept their presence as dark as they dare. I require no assistance. It will be inside that our task becomes much more difficult.”

 _What am I getting myself into?_ I thought. 

“Sara, I do not question your ability or your bravery” I Said, “but you are still so young.”

Sara smiled, and would have hugged me I am sure if it would not have drawn attention. “You are very kind, but this battle started for me over a month ago. Rest assured that my father would forbid me from coming if he did not have confidence in my training and ability.”

“I would also tie you to a post for good measure.” Aric said to his daughter.

* * *

It was a short walk until we came upon the bounder, marked by the tree across the river. We stopped and waited.

“How will we know when it is time to move again?” I asked

“We will know.” Was all Aric said.

The dim light of the few torches lighting the mine entrance suddenly vanished, followed by sounds that I wish to never hear again or remember. The beginnings of screams cut short. Other sounds half formed and then ended. And the unmistakable sounds of weapons rending flesh. It lasted only a very short time before silence resumed.

“We can move.” Aric said.

“What should we do with the bodies?” Serana asked.

“It depends on what is on the other side of this door.” Aric said.

“No light shines through the cracks.” Serana said. “There is dark on the other side of the door.

“Search farther down.” He said.

Serana opened the door a crack and peered inside then stepped through the door and closed it.

“Is there a chance that she will be seen?” I asked.

“No.” Aric said.

Serana opened the door a moment later. “There are several dead bandits, but no Thalmor near the entrance.”

It was while we were hiding the bodies of the guards that I saw the brigands.

“Are you certain?” Aric asked

“No.” I answered. “But they resemble the type we saw. Unkept, mismatched armor in poor condition.” We were in a small vault near the entrance which was being used as a storage room. It now stored two dead brigands and four dead Thalmor.

“There are more here.” Sara said from a matching room on the other side of the corridor, standing in the doorway, her staff in her right hand.

“What lies farther down?” Aric asked Serana

“There is a set of stairs leading down to a larger excavation.” She said.

“I do not hear any miners.” I said, “No one is working the mine.”

We made our way to the stairs and looked down into the large chamber.

“Is that what I think it is?” Sara asked.

“Gold.” Aric said. “It is a gold mine.”

There was no question. Gold ore. Gold ingots stacked near a smelter and a pile of molds for turning the one into the other.

“They went to this much effort for a gold mine?” Sara asked

“If they were interested in the gold there would be a beehive of activity.” Aric said. “Noxaura is correct, no one is working this mine.”

“I believe I begin to understand why.” Serana said from a room adjacent to the cavern and connected by a short corridor.

“More dead brigands.” She said. “All have a coating of gold dust on their clothing.”

IT took me a moment. “The brigands are the workers.” I said

“That explains their presence in Dragon’s Bridge.” Aric said.

“Why would the Thalmor kill the workers if not to take control of the mine and the gold?” Sara asked.

“It is a fair question.” Serana said.

Aric walked across the chamber to inspect a matching room and corridor. He was about to enter the corridor when he suddenly stopped and spun around quickly, as two arrows struck his cloak and shattered. He crossed his arms as he cast two spells and spun back around as he extended his arms and flung six shining projectiles down the corridor, drawing his sword in one quick motion before running into the corridor.

I was closest to him as I cast my bound sword spell with my right hand and held a ward ready in my left.

This was no copy of the small room on the other side of the larger chamber, it was a large chamber in its own right, and there were enough Thalmor still alive that I could not count them all. Their two dead comrades were even now rising to attack their living brethren. I cast my ward as a Thalmor solider engaged me. I emulated the bandit I fought near my shack and took the opportunity when it was presented to ram my shoulder into his. I had not nearly the weight of my former opponent, but my attempt was successful enough to give me time to pivot on my left foot, reverse my attack, and remove his head.

Fireballs were traversing the length of the chamber as Sara employed her staff, and a blur of motion preceded dead or dying Thalmor as Serana enter the fray.

Aric had cleared a space around him where he stood in the center of the chamber facing six Thalmor. My bound sword spell had ended, and I was about to switch to destruction magic when Aric cast a spell with his left hand. I could not see the affect it had. Then a thunderclap of sound came from a source I could not identify. It flung the six Thalmor backwards. They struck the wall of the cavern, which should have stunned them all. But the wall seemed to be made of something other than rock and earth. It flowed and as they struck, the six Thalmor appeared to be consumed by it. In a moment the cave wall was solid rock again, portions of armored covered limbs protruding from the rock.

 _By the Gods._ I thought _Who is he?_

Sara was still plying her staff. The remaining Thalmor seemed to be just as distracted by what they saw as I was. I raised two more of the dead Thalmor and reduced the number of living Thalmor with ice spikes.

“I believe we have lost the advantage of stealth.” Serana said.

“This chamber has even more gold that the one above.” Sara said.

“And they did not bother to move the dead bandits.” Aric said. “They left them where they fell.”

“They had no right to do this.” Sara said. “even to bandits. The Concordat does not give them the right to murder.”

“Unless they think this mine is manned entirely by Talos worshipers.” Serana said humorously.

“Can you truly joke now?” Sara asked

“Yes, wildflower.” Serana said. “If we continue it will be worse, with no opportunity to jokes. Now is the time for jokes if you wish to contribute.”

“We have met no Justiciars yet.” Aric said. “That luck cannot last. Sara, distribute these.” He said, handing her the satchel he had slung on his back.

“Here.” Sara said handing me three bottles. “My father’s special potion. Healing, plus regeneration, plus protection. Have you fought a Justiciar before?”

“No.” I answered.

“They are powerful. But the Thalmor will win no prizes for creativity. Most Justiciars will use paralyzing spells, or fear spells, or mayhem spells combined with destruction magic.” She explained.

“How have you dealt with them?” I asked

“I would drink the potion first. It will protect you from their first spells. A ward or ebony skin to protect from their direct attacks. Then whatever attack of your own you prefer.” She said. “I quite like your bound weapon spell.” She said.

“Thank you.” I answered. “I pray to the Divines that it is up to the challenge before us.”

“There are men approaching from the passage leading further down.” Aric said.

“I believe you will discover very soon if your prayer is answered.” Sara said to me.

“Good.” I said. “I dislike long waits.”

* * *

I stopped counting at one hundred. Serana says she continued to count until over two hundred. Two-hundred fewer Thalmor in Dragon's Bridge, in Skyrim, than there were yesterday. Or was it the day before? We were in the mine for what seemed like forever. We found our way back out by following the trail of dead bodies and empty potion flasks. I must have a small fortune of gold dust in my hair, my pockets, my boots. I was looking for an outlet for my anger and my pain and I found it. Now I just feel numb, physically, and emotionally.

Was it wrong? They had a choice, and they chose to attack us. After that it had a life of its own, until that life was spent, in two-hundred small pieces. They gave us no choice. What choice did we give them? Their deaths were written as soon as we stepped into the mine. 

What choice did my brothers and sisters give Aric, what choice did my queen give him before he ended them, ended her? Potema and Aric. Bound together forever now in my mind. 

Will some Thalmor judge me, the way I judged Aric? Will they pass the same sentence on me?

Do I even have the right to judge him anymore, after what I did in the mine, what we all did. I had a choice. I could have stayed in the Inn.

Do the Gods give any of us a choice, or are we puppets? Is our destiny written the day we are born?

Any doubts I had about my weapons spells evaporated quickly. And my surrogate little sister is not the innocent girl I thought she was. I expect stone faced, workmanlike death from a vampire, but not from the young woman that helped me to the bath. 

A long blur of noise, motion, pain, blood, death. 

We left the mine exhausted, hungry, blood spattered, crossing the river on the downed tree, and taking a path back to our horses that would not be observed.

My daydreams of revenge and murder seem silly and childish now, after the mine; after what I saw him do. He could crush me with a thought. He could bend the will of the earth and have it swallow me alive. Those that he killed with the sword should consider it a mercy. 

Who is he? What is he? I have never seen magic like what I saw in the mine.

“ _You do not know him_.” Sara had said. “ _You have not seen him in battle_.”

The mine had certainly corrected that deficiency. 

We were well into our slow ride to Solitude, Sara’s horse carrying double now, before I realized that my pain and grief and anger were… not gone… lagging behind. Possibly they were still searching for the exit from the gold mine. We had collected quite a few empty potion bottles on the way out, so the path out was not as well marked. 

The sun was already climbing the morning sky when we passed the road that turned north to Wolfskull cave.

“What will they do when they discover what transpired in the mine?” I asked Aric as he rode directly ahead of Sara and Me.

“They will do nothing openly. To do so would not serve them.” He said. “It is what they will do secretly that is a concern. They will find another excuse to act. I fear an escalation.”

“What will they think when they see so many dead men and elves?” Sara asked.

“That is a very good question.” Aric said. “We may not have long to wait for the answer.”

“Good.” Sara said. “Noxaura does not like waiting.”


	6. His titles are many

**4 th of Sun's Dawn**

His house in Solitude has an excellent bath. I could have sat in it forever. Excellent wine as well. Wine and a hot bath can cure a great deal. I am so sore and exhausted I cannot find the strength to move.

We were not a reputable sight when we arrived in Solitude at midday. Fortunately, they recognized Aric.

“Honor to you Thane.” The guards said.

“Thane?” I asked.

“Papa is Thane of Haafingar.” Sara said.

I looked at him. “You are one of the Thanes in Solitude?” I asked

“I am.” He said.

“You did not mention this earlier.” I said.

“It seemed unimportant.” He answered.

“Papa is Thane of other holds as well.” Sara said.

“How many others?” I asked.

It took Sara a moment to count.

“Five, including Haafingar.” She said.

“Five?” I asked

“Yes.” She said, slowly reciting the list. “Haafingar, Eastmarch, the Pale, Whiterun and the Reach.”

“You collect Thaneships like trophies sir.” I said to him.

“I do not collect trophies madam.” He answered, “They were offered to me in recognition of a service, and it would have been impolite to refuse.”

It took no gift of true sight to know for what service to Solitude he was made Thane of Haafingar. 

“You must own property to be granted a Thaneship, is that not so?” I asked him

“You are correct madam.” He said

“Do I therefore understand correctly that you own five houses?” I asked

“You count well madam.” He answered.

“Is that not an overabundance of houses?” I asked

“None of my homes sits empty madam.” He replied. “Two of my daughters live in my home in Whiterun, two live in Windhelm.”

“Morryn lives in Markath.” Sara said

His rescued recovering Hagraven lives in his home in Markath.

“My excellent counting skill informs me that is only four homes sir.” I said

“Samuel resides in our home in the Pale while he is learning the art of managing a business.” He answered.

“Samuel is learning business?” I asked “His interests are diverse. But is he not young to be alone so far from home?”

“The Pale is where our businesses lie.” Aric said. “And he is not alone. My steward, the farmer and his wife look after him when they are not instructing him on the finer points of business or swordsmanship.”

Passing through the market square it became apparent quickly that news of the Thane’s return was a point of interest. Of particular interest, it appeared, to the Bard from the Inn, and the high elf who emerged from the clothing merchant’s shop. Very specific interest by the looks on their faces.

* * *

“Honor to you Thane.” His housecarl greeted him as we entered his home in Solitude, through the lower door, given our disheveled state.

 _Dear Gods_. I thought, as she looked at him in a manner that I had recently seem in the market square.

“Is Samuel here?” he asked her.

“Yes.” She answered “He returned very early this morning. He has a message from the Jarl. He is still asleep.”

“It is very good to see you.” He said to her.

“It will be better to see you once you have bathed.” She said with a smile, and a look that did not bode well for his chances of rest.

“Jordis, this is a Noxaura. She will be our guest during her stay in Solitude. Your grace, this is Jordis, my Housecarl.” He said.

“Welcome, lady.” Jordis said. 

“Divines bless you and keep you safe, Housecarl.” I said, not able to remember accurately when I last greeted anyone in that manner.

“We have had a long road, and are in desperate need of food and rest, but our most immediate need is the bath.” He said

“Samuel said to anticipate your return, Thane. The bath is hot.” She said.

“Sara and Noxaura have priority. Serana and I will wait our turn.” He said.

Serana’s face said all that needed saying. Divines give me strength.

“You will find several very heavy sacks and satchels at the entrance. Treat them accordingly.” He said.

“Shield Sister!” Sara said as she and Jordis embraced.

“You are not injured?” Jordis asked her, her affection plain for all to see.

“Nothing worth mentioning.” Sara said.

“Your answer would not change if you were missing a limb.” Jordis said. “I will see your injuries before I let you go to bed.”

“Do not fuss.” Sara said. “Noxaura was wounded as well and would also benefit from your care.”

“I am a stranger to her grace, and she may be more comfortable having your assistance.” Jordis said. 

“Will someone, out of common courtesy at least, show some concern for my injuries?” Aric asked.

“You will not want for attention, beloved Thane.” Jordis said. “Rest assured.”

Gods.

Any food would have been welcome after so long a time drinking only healing potions. I should ask Sara what ingredients went into making those potions. Surely it cannot be wise to have drank as many as we did, but circumstance dictated our actions in the mine.

Circumstances being different today, we enjoyed a wonderful small meal of barley soup and bread, prepared by an excellent cook; our damp hair drying in the warmth of his Solitude home. 

Aric’s bath and meal did not leave time for relaxation. His effect on my heart rate, which had been drown out by the mayhem of battle during our stay in the mine, had returned. Now, cleaned and dressed in city finery I was forced to admit that he was a very attractive figure, and that my criticisms of all the amorous looks he is receiving may be out of place. His current appearance was not helping my heart rate.

My heart had not long to suffer though, as he ate a quick meal and left to consult with the Jarl. His chair was not cold for long.

“Milady, our reunion is at hand.” Samuel said as he came down the stairs.

“Young sir” I said, standing to greet him “You have kept your promise. I am happy to see you well and whole.”

“It was an uneventful journey.” He said, “I rode as fast as I dared and saw no one else the entire time until They town guards as I neared the stables.”

“Papa is with the Jarl.” Sara said to her brother “He read the message you brought from her.”

“Will you leave me in suspense forever?” he asked, “What transpired after I left Dragon’s Bridge?”

“Too much for us to recount now. We are exhausted and are off to bed.” Sara said. “Father or Serana can inform you, but do not press them for too much detail. They are both in need of rest also”

“That does not bode well.” He said

“We are all alive, our injuries are minor, our involvement still undiscovered.” Sara said to her younger brother “but for the rest, you are correct. We stirred something that I fear will boil over before long.”

“Where is Serana?” Samuel Asked

“I had thought she had gone to bed.” Sara said

“Father’s bed was empty a moment ago when I came down.” He answered.

Father’s bed. The sleeping arrangements began to become clear to me.

“Speaking of bed.” I said

“Yes.” Sara said, “It is past time we were both in bed.”

* * *

I know who he is now.

It was mid afternoon when, wearing borrowed finery, I paid last homage to my Wolf Queen. Aric had returned from the Blue Palace and accompanied me but only to the temple door, where a priest of Arkay met me and brought me to the final resting place of my Wolf Queen, Potema Septim, Queen of Solitude. I was glad of the privacy he afforded me. We spoke afterwards. He pointed out that he was a priest of Arkay, and that this was not diminished by the fact that he would never in life see Arkay. His message to me was not subtle, but I thought it was kind of him to comfort a Priestess of his former nemesis, the former queen of Solitude. I thanked him. His last statement before we parted left me speechless: 

"The Dragonborn and Potema formed a connection when he interrupted her summoning.” He said, “That is why it had to be him to finally vanquish her." 

I just stood there for a moment like a sheriff’s post. 

“The Dragonborn?” I asked

“Yes.” He answered. “Thane Aric is Dragonborn.”

I had no idea what ‘Dragonborn’ meant, but it was not foremost in my mind.

“He shared a connection with Potema?” I asked.

“Yes.” He said, “It persisted afterwards. She knew of his approach in the catacombs. She could have prevented him, but she did not.”

“She allowed her rebirth to be ended?” I asked. It was more than I could believe.

“No one can know her motivations.” He said. “Ask the Thane if you would know what transpired.” 

Aric and Potema. Bound together forever. 

I had felt it already. I knew it long before this priest had opened his mouth. I am still a Priestess of Potema, and Aric is my last connection to her. Is that what I feel when I am near him?

Serana was with him when I left the temple. Neither one questioned me about my visit. We walked slowly back to his house. I kept glancing at him. Then a guard stopped him.

“You have rid the land of a great evil, Thane.” He said, “we are all in your debt.”

My face became hot immediately. I pressed my lips together to stop from screaming at this guard that the great evil included my brothers and sisters. Serana must have noticed my reaction.

“May we speak privately?” she asked

“Certainly.” I said through a clenched jaw.

“Let us sit on the porch.” She said.

“I was difficult not to notice your reaction to the guard.” She said once we were seated.

“I would have been just as difficult to not notice yours if it had been your family that was killed.” I answered.

“It was my family that was killed.” She said plainly.

“I do not understand.” I said. “Your family resides inside as we speak.”

“No.” she answered. “Aric’s family resides inside. My family is dead.”

“I am very sorry.” I said, “I misunderstood your relationship.”

“Do not be sorry.” She said. “It was Aric that killed my family, with my help.”

It was beyond my comprehension.

“You assumed that the evil the guard mentioned was Potema. It is much more likely that the evil he mentioned was my father.” She said. “Few knew of Potema’s rebirth but vampire attacks in the cities and towns were widespread. My father was Vampire Lord. He was the source of those attacks.”

“Your father was Lord of all vampires?” I asked. Aric had said that her Father was dead. He did not mention how.

“Those who did not acknowledge his title and pay him homage died painfully.” She said. “The guard may also have referred to Alduin.”

“Alduin?” I asked. “That is the second time I have heard that name.” I was clearly lacking in parts of my education.

“Alduin was considered the first among dragons.” She said, “He is referred to as ‘World Eater’ and ‘Harbinger of the Apocalypse’. In parts of Tamriel ‘Alduin’ is used in place of ‘Akatosh’. The prophesy foretelling Alduin’s return is written on a wall that bears his name in Skyhaven Temple. His return would coincide with the return of the Dragonborn. They will meet in battle. If Alduin prevails the world will end. But Alduin did not prevail. He was defeated. Aric defeated him. So, you see, the world has recently had many evils.”

“All of them ended by Aric, Dragonborn, Thane of Solitude.” I said

“His titles are many.” She said, “You have learned but a few.”

“May I speak plainly?” I asked

“I would prefer it.” She said.

“he killed your family, and you help him.” I said. “But I see the way you look at him; the way so many women look at him. You share his bed. After he killed your family.”

She smiled. “You confuse my family with your own.” She said. “You mourn your family. Shall I tell you something of my own family?”

“If you wish.” I said.

“My father pledged himself to Molag Bal.” she said. “and in his name sacrificed thousands of innocents. For this, Molag Bal granted him and his family immortality by turning all of us into pure-blood vampires. The ceremony was conducted my Molag Bal himself. It was horrible. Violent. Demeaning. Molag Bal violated each of us in every way possible. Physically, mentally, spiritually. I trust you take my meaning.”

I felt like I would be sick. 

“I see by your face that you do.” She said. “My father believed a prophecy that he could plunge the world into eternal darkness so vampires would no longer need fear the sun. One of the things that was required was my ritual sacrifice.”

I was certain I would be sick

“This is why my mother hid me.” She said, “And why my father, and any of my family that followed him, had to die. My mother and I are the last of our line. The last Daughters of Coldharbor.”

“I beg your pardon Lady.” I said. “I did not know what we had in common.”

“You mourn your family as you saw them last.” She said. “I morn my family as they were one-thousand years ago. It is difficult for me to remember them as they were then. You are blessed with more recent memories. Hold those memories close, particularly your memories of your father. They are a treasure you cannot replace.”

“You are very kind, lady, and wise.” I said.

“If you ask for wisdom, the Gods will give it generously without finding fault.” Serana said.

“That is beautiful.” I said

“My father said that to me a very long time ago.” She answered.

* * *

I sat by myself on the poach while the sun set.

Who is it that has given me a place to stay while I pay my last respects and homages to my queen? 

Who is this that has twice now save the world from destruction without my noticing?

Why does he make my heart race?

On the ride from my tiny shack to Dragon's Bridge I had tried to keep my anger and dreams of revenge alive, but they were too damp for the spark to take hold. 

How can a man who shows such tenderness to his children and his horses, who mourns a dead bandit, do what I saw him do in the mine? How can any man defeat a dragon in single combat? He defeated the first of dragons. He defeated the first of Vampire Lords. He defeated Potema. It is no longer a question whether I have judged him wrongly, it is whether I am qualified to judge him at all.

I do not understand what is happening.

What do I feel when I am near him?

What did he put in those potions? 

What is wrong with me?

* * *

It was a quiet evening; everyone taking the opportunity to rest and relax. Samuel played the lute while Sara sang.

Relaxed was not the word to describe Samuel later, when he realized that I was sharing a bedroom with him and Sara and their younger brothers. He is very sweet, the way he tries not to look, and the way he acts. Sara just rolls her eyes, but Blaise asked him once: “Are you alright?” 

Sara said goodnight to each of her younger brothers, adjusting their blankets, and kissing each of them in turn. The hairbrush appeared, and we spent a few quiet minutes together.

“May I ask you about your visit to the temple?” she asked.

“The priest was very kind.” I said. “And informative. He and Serana together helped me gain perspective.”

“Serana mentioned her family?” Sara asked

“Yes.” I said. “I was certain I would be ill when she described what she endured. May we speak of more pleasant things? I will not sleep otherwise. “

“Certainly.” She said. “We should go shopping tomorrow. You will need clothes that fit properly.”

“I would like that.” I said, “I would also like to spend time in your impressive library.”

“And we should definitely visit the palace. Sara said.

* * *

“I do not know what I expected.” I said, “A wife, at least, since he has children. Not all these women looking at him the way they do.”

“Not all men have wives.” Railius said. “I didn’t have a wife when I met you.”

“You had lost your wife and daughter by then.” I reminded him. “It is possible that he has lost his wife as well.”

“By the look of things there is no shortage of willing replacements in Solitude.” He said. “No woman ever looked at me like that, not even Vila.”

“He is a prettily wrapped package.” I said “It is what is under the wrapping that is important. You are the most valuable gift the Divines could ever have given me.”

“You’re my good lass.” He said. “The Divines gave me you to fill my heart after Vila and Lita. It was years after they died before I prayed again. It was a prayer of thanks for you.”

“I wish you were here.” I said, the tears starting down my face.

“The house of a Thane is no place for an old soldier.” He said. 

“His housecarl is a soldier or at least has been at some time, judging by her manner.” I said.

“I like the look of her.” He said with a smile.

“She is younger than I am!” I laughed

“I would have to be deader than I am to not find her attractive.” He said, his smile persisting. “Besides, what else is there for me to do now besides dream? Don’t cry lass. I had a good life. I family I loved. Two families, since I met you. That is enough treasure for any man.”

“I don’t want you to go. Stay with me.” I said

“I never left you. I never will.” He said.

“I do not know what to do.” I admitted.

“Go home. To Cyrodiil. Skyrim was never your home. It was Catilia brought you here. You did not have a choice. Pevel was a good woman, but I never warmed to Catilia, her with her strange ideas and strange ways. Go to Bruma. Petition the Mother Superior. She will give you a place. You were too young to choose when Catilia took you away. She won’t blame you. Rejoin the Communities. Above all, don’t go back to that cave.” He said.

“I know you never liked it.” I said

“It was too damp. My knee always ached.” He said. “Did I ever tell you how I hurt my knee?” he asked me.

It may have been my laughter that woke me, or the dawn just beginning to lighten the windows of our shared bedroom, or the distant noises from the kitchen. Everyone else was still asleep. I lay in my borrowed bed and thought about Railius’ advice. 

* * *

Blaise took me down to the stables where he used to work, and from where he was adopted. 

All of Aric’s children are adopted. It never occurred to me. Sara obviously looks nothing like Aric. Likewise, for Samuel, which would be easier to spot but for the mop of hair on his head. 

He has adopted Nords, and Bretons, and Redguards and Imperials. 

But what race is he? 

No race currently native to Tamriel. 

Reanimating the dead is a lesson in history, or archeology. 

His is one of the old races that came to Tamriel, crossing the sea from the frozen North long, long ago. He taps an innate magic, and practices a Sorcery that he was born with, that he never had to learn, not like men must learn it. Not like I learned it. 

Coming back after spending time with the horses Blaise was in a good mood, and talkative. He said his older sisters and brother lived in Whiterun before moving to Solitude. He misses them. His sister Delphine and his brother Hroar still live in Solitude but are away.

Ten children. 

He adopted ten children. 

I asked him who took care of him while his Father was away and he said Jordis mostly, but his Father would hire nurses, and someone cook for them, and clean for them, and teach them. He says the Jarls of Whiterun, and Solitude are good friends with his father, and always made sure they were looked after. I asked him if he missed having a mother and he said he always has women looking after him, so it's not so bad. When they visit Whiterun the head Priestess Danica stops by to visit almost every day. And in Solitude Jarl Elisif comes by the house a to visit quite a lot.

The Jarl. Elisif the Fair. Future High Queen of Skyrim. Comes to the house. To visit. A lot. And I can guess how she looks at Aric when he is home for those visits. Blessed Divines.

* * *

“Have you considered what you wish to do for the coming season?” he asked me.

It was evening, as we walked slowly towards the palace. It was cool, and my newly purchased plain cloak was welcome. A cloak, a new robe, gloves, and boots to replace the borrowed wardrobe I had been wearing.

“You have been very generous.” I said. “I have abused your hospitality. I will consider my options, but I will not trouble you longer.”

“You misinterpret me madam.” He said “I apologize if I gave you the impression that you were not welcome; nothing could be further from the truth. You are welcome to stay as long as you wish.”

“You are much too kind sir, but I cannot impose on you indefinitely.” I said

“You are no imposition madam.” He said, “I ask because we will depart for our home in the Pale to deliver Samuel to his teachers and then continue on to Whiterun so I may confer with Jarl Balgruf. If you have no immediate plans, we would be pleased to continue enjoying your company.”

What plans could I possibly have? I have the items I retrieved from my shack. I have the clothing I just purchased from that insufferable high elf I noticed when we arrived in Solitude. I have what gold is left in my purse.

“You flatter me sir, and you are excessive in your generosity.” I said.

“We leave in three days. Please consider my offer or, if you prefer, stay here while we are away.”

“I will consider your offer sir. Thank you.” I said

It is always best in these situations to not seem too eager.


	7. I do not want it to fade

**10th of Sun's Dawn**

When he mentioned his house in the Pale, I had not pictured this. Not just a house, but also a farm. And a mine. An apiary. An outdoor bath and sauna. His steward and Housecarl met us at the stable.

“Noxaura, this is Freya my steward. We were companions for many years. Freya, this is Noxaura, a Priestess from Solitude and a friend of our family.”

“Welcome to Heljarchen Hall Lady.” She said. She was somewhat older than I but still younger than Aric. Classically Imperial, with a swords-woman’s arms that looked as it they were very familiar with the imperial leaf blade she wore on her back.

“Divines protect you and your household, Steward.”

“This is Nora, my Housecarl.” Aric said

We exchanged greetings. The Dark Elf Housecarl was not many years older than Samuel but already a beautiful woman. A beautiful woman who looked often at Samuel. Aric and his steward would do well to watch that pair.

* * *

The ride from Solitude to the Pale was uneventful. We passed several sets of wolves, but they did not give us a second glance. I had noticed it before, on the ride to Dragon's Bridge. I thought, "They must have just stuffed themselves", though they were not acting like it. I have never seen wolves act that way when people were around.

Aric and Samuel spent time visiting the mine and farm and the apiary, Samuel's lessons on business beginning shortly after our arrival. Sara mentioned that it is Freya who trains Samuel in the art of the sword.

I had recently had my fill of mines, so I skipped the mine and Sara and I dangled out feet in the outdoor hot pool before we went on with the remainder of the tour. 

In the evening, we made the strangest visit I have ever seen. There is a small grotto very close by where a giant keeps his mammoths. In the evening the huge bonfire there can be seen for miles. I would not have gotten within a mile of it on my own. Aric and Sara walked right up to it. The mammoths came over for the expected attention and made that low vibrating sound they make when they are happy. I swear the giant nodded his head at them and went about his patrol, keeping an eye open for threats.

Wolves, mammoths, giants. Women. Is there any creature not under his spell?

* * *

**11th of Sun's Dawn**

Spiders are not under his spell. 

* * *

Arriving in Whiterun we were met on the road by guards that seemed well acquainted with Aric and Sara. After exchanging pleasantries, and introductions Sara said, "this is my friend Nox, a Priestess visiting from Solitude". 

The guards smile and make gestures of reverence or bowed slightly. I have not felt like a Priestess in quite some time. It has seemed recently that my life as a Necromancer has dominated, but I smiled and bowed in return and said, "blessing of the Divines be upon you good sirs." which seems to please everyone. 

Then one of the guards cocks his thumb at Aric and says "Did he tell you how he captured a dragon in Dragon's Reach and then let it go?

It took me a moment to find my words and to convince myself that I had heard him properly. All I could do was slowly turn and look at Aric and say "No, he did not".

"It's a long story" he said

"It would have to be" I replied.

* * *

The house was much smaller, but the daughters were just as beautiful. As was the housecarl Lydia. Of course. It was not hard to hear them both upstairs.

"Spend some time with me. I've missed you." she said quietly.

"I know." he said. "I'm sorry. Something is going on with The Thalmor. I don't know what, but it may be bad. We have been chasing it for weeks. I need to consult Jarl Balgruuf."

"You already have so many responsibilities.” She said. “Must this also be yours to deal with? Have Balgruf or Elisif write to the Emperor.”

“I do not yet know who to trust.” He answered. “The Thalmor are dispersed across Skyrim in force. They could not do so much without assistance. We found Penitus Oculatus forces assisting the Thalmor at a clandestine outpost in Haafingar. They attacked us without parlay or warning. No on survived, man or elf. Elisif knows all; Balgruf is about to. 

“They are the personal forces of the Emperor. They cannot possibly have been genuine.” Lydia said.

“They were men, and their armor was certainly genuine.” Aric said

“This makes no sense.” Lydia said.

“I am not confident that a message can be delivered safety to the Emperor, and I am not confident what the Emperor would do if he were to receive it.” Aric said.

“What choice do we have?” she asked

“Skyrim must guard and defend itself.” Aric said, “That is our only choice until we know better whom to trust.”

“I am ashamed to have whined like a maid from lack of attention when you are taking on so much.” She said. “I am your sword and shield, beloved.”

"You are much more than my sword and my shield, and your Thane forbids you from feeling ashamed. We have been together too long for shame or misunderstanding. You know I do not doubt your love, and I know you do not doubt mine. I wish we had more time. We are riding to Windhelm tomorrow." he said.

“You do not trust Ulfric so much to tell all.” She said, “Not after all we have learned about his history with the Thalmor. It would be quicker if you traveled to the Thalmor embassy and told Elenwen directly.”

“I am not sure. We have evidence that part of this is aimed at Elenwen. It may be that informing her is a good idea. But you are correct, my trust in Ulfric is uneven.” He answered. “Self interest is the key that unlocks action with him. This matter is still too mixed to see the true path. I will speak of strange matters in Skyrim, mention rumors of a secret base, hint, if necessary, of possible Thalmor involvement. He does not know the extend of our knowledge regarding his work for the Thalmor. I will speak and then interpret his response.”

“There is one who would require no interpretation. She would know all quickly.” Lydia said.

“I will not risk her.” He answered. “This is my task alone.”

“If you do not come back to me, I will rampage through Skyrim until everyone involved in this is in Oblivion.” She said.

“Do not.” He answered. “It would be your end as well. It would not be right to deprive our children of their Father and Mother in such a fashion.”

“In that event beloved, you must promise me you will return.” Lydia said. “A most solemn promise.”

“I promise on the heads of our children that if return is possible, I will return. That is the best I can do, heart of my heart.” He said.

So, he has a wife, and his children have a mother after all.

* * *

Whiterun was preparing for the celebration of Heart's Day later that evening. I am still acting the religious Priestess during my stay in Whiterun, reacquainting myself with my earlier life, before Mother Catilia, before our small cloister called Solitude home, to be closer to Potema. 

You can get quite far on "blessings of the Divines be upon you", a nondescript hooded cloak and a downward, contemplative gaze. Lucia was my guide around Whiterun, where she says she was born, and from where she was adopted. The first of Aric's children. It seems she knows everyone, and everyone knows her. Tall, statuesque; trained in spell and staff. I liked her immediately. 

“To what Order do you belong?” she asked me.

“It is a small sect, local mostly to Solitude.” I answered. “You will not be familiar with it. Not many are.”

Not a lie exactly. I am from Solitude and it is a small sect, certainly local, and not many have heard of it. I am not even sure it matters at this point. The deity I worshiped is just like the rest now. Consigned to Oblivion, and history. 

The deity whom I accompanied to Whiterun, and what oblations I owe to him, that is yet to be seen. But his sect seems to be larger than mine was. I saw how the blacksmith looked at him, and the merchant, and the trader.

“The guards that met us told an outlandish story of Your father capturing a dragon in Dragon’s Reach and then releasing it.” I said as we stared up at Dragon’s Reach from beneath the Gildergreen. 

“You find the story hard to accept?” she asked me.

“I would have found it impossible to accept before hearing of Sara’s first encounter with a Dragon.” I said, “And before my own.”

“You encountered a dragon?” she asked

“Yes. On your journey here.” I answered. “It flew directly overhear but paid us little attention. I will die happy never seeing another.”

“The are not so bad.” Lucia replied. “Once you make their acquaintance.”

“Samuel made a comment regarding you and dragons, but Your father did not let him finish.” I told her. “’She will grow bored with us if she hears all of our family’s stories’ he said.”

“There is not much to tell.” She replied, as she looked at me and smiled. “And my farther is correct. We must maintain an air of mystery or you will surely tire of us.”

I felt it was time to change the direction of my attack.

“This is a lovely tree.” I said.

“It is.” she replied. “It was dying until my father helped bring it back to life.”

“He did so?” I asked

“Yes.” She said. “As a favor to Danica, the high Priestess in the temple of Kynareth.”

“That was very generous of him.” I said

“They are very old friends.” She said. “And she was like a mother to us when we were young.”

“Forgive me, but I thought Lydia was your mother.” I said

Lucia smiled. “Lydia raised us, those of us who grew up in Whiterun.” She said. “My father was away for long periods of time, and so it was Lydia who took care of us. She became our mother as much as papa became our father. She and Danica made sure we were loved and cared for. “

“You do not call her Mother.” I said

“She would not allow it.” Lucia said. “’I love you like you are children from my body’ she would say. ‘But I do not have the right to call myself your mother. Call me Lydia. It will not diminish the love between us.’”

“You will make me cry if you continue in this fashion.” I said truthfully.

“Those of us who learned the sword had Lydia as our first teacher.” She said.

I stopped as we passed the blacksmith that Railius and I had visited. I stared at the forge for a moment, remembering our visit.

“My father and I visited this forge when we were in Whiterun last.” I said. “He had been a solider, and never lost his love for fine weapons and armor.”

“where is Your father now?” she asked.

“In a grave in the Rift.” I said as my eyes grew damp.

“I am very sorry.” She said.

“My final resting place would be very close to his if not for Your father.” I said. “I was fortunate that he found me when he did.”

“’The Gods chose whom they guide and whom they lead astray.’” She said.

I looked at her with a new respect.

“It is something my father says from time to time.” She said

“That is a fatalistic point of view.” I said.

“Very much so.” She said.

* * *

“Vilkas this is Noxaura, a Priestess from Solitude and a friend of my father’s.” Lucia said.

“Your grace.” He said. “welcome to Jorrvaskr, the hall of the Companions.”

“Divines protect you and keep you safe Companion.” I said.

I had heard of the Companions but had never met one. There were several others present, an equal number of men and women, but no one else showed any interest in greeting Lucia. It required only a casual glance at Vilkas’ face to understand his interest; and Lucia was not immune to his interest, changing went from casual, relaxed guide to proper lady, noble and mannered. She was being gracious, but obviously enjoying the attention. He was completely smitten. 

“How is my brother in arms?” Vilkas asked. “He has been absent for some time.”

“He is well.” She answered. “He arrived in Whiterun just now. He has a matter to discuss with the Jarl.”

I had kept my hood up to remain invisible, as most religious are in public, but Lucia was still able to see the expression on my face as I turned and looked at her.

“My father is one of the Companions.” She said.

 _He has many titles indeed._ I thought.

“He is a worthy addition to our number.” Vilkas said. “As would other members of his family if there were any justice in Skyrim.”

“We sorted that matter long ago dear friend.” She said, her manner quickly reverting to warm friendship, with a hint of something more. “It is not important. We are Companions to each other in our hearts, whether we all reside in Jorrvaskr or no.”

I began to feel that I should afford them some privacy, but Vilkas broke toe spell.

“Ask you Father to visit his brothers and sisters. We miss tales of his exploits.” He said.

“I will.” She said. “How is Farkas?” she asked.

“Well enough.” He answered. “How is Runa?” he asked

“Well enough.” She said as they both smiled

* * *

"Invisible" did not describe the head Priestess of Kynareth in the temple by the Gildergreen. She was beautiful, and not hiding anything. No nondescript hooded cloak. Elegance. She greeted Lucia like a daughter and asked about Aric.

“Danica, this is Noxaura, a Priestess from Solitude traveling with my father.” She said.

“Kyne’s blessing nurture and guide you sister.” She said.

“Blessings of the Divines guide and protect you sister.” I answered her

Her voice was melodic, a true Nord voice, wrapped in a natural grace. So, this was Danica.

The temple had supplicants but seemed more to be a house of healing, and there were many here who were in need, and too few healers. I did not have Aric's gift, but I did have my own.

“Sister you have so many seeking your attention.” I said

“Yes.” She said, “It has been a difficult season.”

“My first training as a novitiate of Cybele was Healing.” I said, “Please allow me to offer my assistance.”

“If you are in earnest, sister your help would be most welcome.” She said, “It is only myself and Acolyte Jenssen tending the sick and wounded.”

“I am ready to begin at once.” I said as I removed my cloak.

“I will inform Sara and Father why you are delayed.” Lucia said. “Shall I return for you later?”

“I will return her to you.” Danica said. “It will be my pleasure.”

Afternoon had become evening by the time we walked slowly back to Aric’s home. 

“Lucia tells me that you and Lydia were mothers to them when they were young.” I said.

“Lydia was their true mother.” Danica said. “I would visit every day and sit with them or play games. I would stay for dinner often or return once they were in bed to give Lidia the opportunity for adult conversation. But Lydia was with them virtually every second of the day.”

“She must have been very young.” I said. “It is so much responsibility for a young Housecarl.”

  
“it is much responsibility for anyone.” She answered. “But she was not overwhelmed. She and Lucia have a special bond since Lucia was first adopted and for a short time it was just Lucia and Lydia.”

“Aric was away often?” I asked.

“Aric was always away.” Danica said. “In the early days.”

“I have known him only a short time, but I cannot imagine him being away from his children for so long.” I said. “He dotes on them. He and Lydia and you have much to be proud of in them.”

“How did you and Aric meet?” she asked

“I was dying in the wilderness.” I said. “I would have died but for him. He and Sara and Samuel are why I am alive today.”

“The Divines guided him to you.” She said.

“The Gods decide whom they guide and whom they lead astray.” I said, quoting Lucia.

The smile on Danica’s face needed no explanation.

Sara and her sister Runa had reverted to being nine years old, sitting on the floor of their bedroom laughing and shrieking and talking nonstop. No one seeing that would believe what Sara had just done in the mine. Sara and Lucia had both mentioned that, like Lucia before her and Sara after her, Runa had trained in Winterhold; but as a Spell-sword. Unlike Sara, both Lucia and Runa wore armor. Armor I had just recently seen on scores of dead elves in the mine: gilded and glass elven armor. Thank the Divines they were not in the mine with us. In the chaos we would never have been able to tell them apart. 

They had all inherited that easy humor and camaraderie. Not inherited. Learned. From Lydia, from Aric and the others that helped raise them. They learned the skills needed to survive the mine, and the skills to be brothers and sisters that could tease and laugh and be tender. 

Could that have ever been me? Lucia and I are about the same age. I am no orphan. My mother may yet still live. But I did not have this relationship with anyone in our order besides Railius. Would it have been different if I had stayed in Bruma?

Dinner, courtesy of the Jarl, brought in and served by the Jarl's servants. I would not have believed you could have fit that many people in that small a space. We sat shoulder to shoulder, the seven of us. We were not quite as loud as the battle in the mine, but we were close. Talking, laughing, bumping shoulders. Lucia recounted the story about the first time her farther took here on an adventure, when she was barely a teenager. 

Even the Jarl's servants were red faced with laughter. 

"It wasn't that bad." he said.

Lydia was laughing so hard she could barely talk "One side of you head was completely singed!"

"You are exaggerating." he replied.

"It took two months for the hair on that side of your head to grow out!" Runa screamed.

"I was young, and it was my first real fight." Lucia said. "I was nervous, and I hadn't perfected my aim yet."

"You had better tell Vilkas to keep behind you if the two of you go out walking tonight with the rest of the couples." Runa said

Everyone laughed as Lucia said "Vilkas and I are not going to go out walking anywhere tonight or any night."

"Don't let him hear you say that, he will throw himself off Dragon's Reach." Lydia said.

I look at Lucia and raised an eyebrow and she explained "Vilkas is one of the Companions you met today. The courteous one."

I remember him. Courteous is one way to describe it, but it was not the word I chose.

"He and Farkas have survived much worse than not going walking with me on Heart's Day" Lucia said.

It was Runa's turn to explain. "Vilkas and his brother Farkas were rescued from a Necromancer cult when they were little."

Sara's hand found mine under the table.

I tried to make it sound like a perfectly bland question: "Why did they need rescuing?"

"Their parents were killed by Necromancers and they were kidnapped. The Necromancers did terrible things to them." Lucia said

"Terrible things?" I asked

"One day Farkas would not stop crying, so the used an Alteration spell on him, and for a week he did not have a mouth. He was three years old. He did not start talking again until he was eight".

Sara had a death grip on my hand, but I barely noticed. I knew that Necromancers had a bad reputation; that was why I was hiding it. But this. Even I could not comprehend this.

Lucia saw that I was upset and reached over the table for my other hand and said, "It was a long time ago." She let go my hand. "It is how Vilkas and I came to be friends. We are both orphans, we are both adopted. He is a few years older than me and used to see me begging under the Gildergreen. He and Farkas would bring me food sometimes. Their Father Jergen was a Companion so they have lived in Jorrvaskr most of their lives.

Sara's hand relaxed. Everyone was quiet. Just the sounds of eating and drinking. I looked at Sara, and she looked back and smiled. How could she look at me like that, after that story? That story that she knew when she met me and found out what I was. I looked at Aric, and he looked back. It went on just a bit too long, so he covered it by reaching for the bottle and refilling my glass. Runa glanced at each of us, and Sara whispered to her "The story upset her. She is not used to that sort of thing."

I excused myself and went downstairs and sat on one of the beds. Who were those people? I had never heard of spells like that. On a three-year-old. No wonder they hate us all.

Sara sat next to me and said in my ear very quietly "That is not you. You are a good person. I am lucky to know you."

"How can you say that. I have done terrible things. Some of them quite recently." I said

"We both have" she replied.

"But no one in Whiterun tells stories about how horrible the Thane's children are and the horrible things they do. A Necromancer cult. How do I know it was not mine?" I asked.

"Because no group that could do that to a three-year-old boy could produce a person as good as you". she answered.

I felt sick, and I said so; just as Lucia came in with a mug of tea. She handed it to me with a smile and sat down on another bed. She must think me the innocent religious, incapacitated by the horrors I had just heard. I took a deep breath, slipped back into my role and said "Thank you. Blessings for your kindness."

"Rest" was all she said. Then to Sara "Papa wants to talk to us."

On their way upstairs I could hear them talking

"Your friend is quite sensitive. She must be a good healer." 

"She is tougher than she looks"

Everyone was settling down for bed. Normal nighttime routines for a normal family. Lucia had inherited the master bedroom when she moved back to Whiterun. Lydia was getting her wish and Aric was sharing her small bed, close enough to us that they probably should use a muffle spell. I am sure he knows several. He would need to in a house this small. 

Serana had still not returned. She had missed diner. How did she fit into normal family life? I know they shared a bed in Solitude, and while I saw her drink, I could not remember ever seeing her eat. I realized how little I knew about vampires. 

Sara and I had our baths together, and she wanted to braid my hair. She said she likes to braid Delphine's hair, but since she had been away at school, she had not done it in a while, and she missed it. While she was braiding, I asked her about her father.

"Your father adopted ten children and raised you all on his own?

"Not all at once, and not really by himself. As some of us grew up and moved to other cities he would adopt more children. Sadly, there is no shortage of orphans. And we always had friends of my father stop by and cook, or clean, or teach us, or train us. But all of us who are ready for advanced training go somewhere else for that. That is why you did not meet Delphine or Hroar in Solitude."

"Blaise mentioned that Jarl Elisif was a frequent visitor in Solitude."

"Yes, she would visit quite often. We all like her. And she is another orphan, so we have something in common."

The orphan Jarl. I would never have guessed.

"Something in common besides Your father" I said.

Sara laughed. "Yes, I suppose"

"Does Jarl Balgruuf visit here quite often?"

"No, but Vilkas regularly pays us a visit" said Runa as she walked in from the bath.

"Shut up!" said Lucia right behind her, laughing.

"My father asked to talk you before you retired, if you are willing." Lucia said to me.

My heart, ever predictable, began to race. "Do you know why?" I asked.

"Yes. Please don't be concerned. It is nothing bad. It's about tomorrow"

Runa gave me a house robe to wear and I went upstairs, passing a very happy Lydia on the way.

"Our journey will run from Whiterun to Wildhelm to Riften to Markath and back to Solitude with stops in between. It's a long journey and Sara would just follow on her own if I ordered her to stay. But there is no need for you to make that long a ride. Danica mentioned the work you did today, and she was very appreciative of the help, and she would certainly give you work at the temple if you chose to stay here. You can also come with us to any hold you choose, build a life anywhere you choose. 

And you will not be short of resources. I was not so crazed with blood-lust that I did not stop and collect as much gold ore and ingots as I could carry. Serana carried even more than I did. A share of that is yours and it is a considerable amount. No more shack in the woods, unless that is what you want.

"This is the second time I have gotten the impression that you wish to be rid of me" I said

"Not at all. I just want you to know that you have choices"

"Why? Do you feel a debt to me because of..." I stopped talking. Had it always been this warm? 

"No. May I ask you...are you well?" he asked

"There is a buzzing in my head, and my heart is racing" Then I just said it "Why do I feel this way when I am near you? What did you put in those potions? What is happening to me?"

"There was nothing in those potions that we did not all drink. All the ingredients would be familiar to you. The potions are not the cause."

"Then what is?" I asked, “What is wrong with me?”

"As to that I have a theory. When I said earlier that Potema has finally been laid to rest, I was telling you the truth, but it seems not the entire truth."

I stopped breathing. He was going to tell me what I already knew.

"Potema made a connection with me in Wolfskull Cave. That connection did not end when she was defeated in the catacombs and laid to rest. Something remains."

I threw off the bathrobe and began the Prayer of Faith. He stopped me gently. "Please don't."

I was on my knees, looking up at him sitting there, holding my hands in his in front of the fireplace.

"It is not like." he said as he let go of my hands. "I am not her. I do not hear her voice. I do not feel her influence. Priestesses of Dibella describe having a small part of Dibella within them that they can feel, and access. In my case this small part of Potema is the barest of whispers. I can sense it. I acknowledge it. I cannot access it. It does not influence me. That may be what you feel, a connection to that part of her. In that sense we feel the same thing. I felt the connection with you when we met, in the same manner I felt the connection to Potema Septim as soon as it was made in the cave. You also have a small part, a whisper, of Potema."

"There is a part of Potema within me? You can sense it?" I asked

"Yes. When I said that Potema does not influence me, that may also not be the entire truth. I do not think it was an accident that I chose a route home that took us past your shack."

I had suddenly gone from too warm to too cold. Still covered in sweat, and shivering. He knelt and retrieved the bath robe and wrapped it around be. He stayed there, on the floor in front of me.

"I felt the connection with Potema as it was happening. When it persisted, I thought it was just an after-affect, that it was temporary. It was not until our second meeting, when she demonstrated her ability to Shout that I realized our connection was stronger than that, and no accident."

"Shout?" I asked

"A talent of those referred to as Dragonborn. Men who share a dragon's ability to shout, to speak the language of the Dov, _Dovahzul_. The greybeards dedicate their lives to its study."

"Potema was Dragonborn?" I asked

"Possibly. Ulfric was also able to shout. That is how he killed King Torygg. And Ulfric was not Dragonborn. The grey beards are not Dragonborn, but they can shout because they have spent their lives studying and perfecting their ability. I somehow doubt that the Wolf Queen dedicated that much time to study. She may have chosen me because I am Dragonborn; she certainly thought that she could convince me to join with her or bend me to her will. At that time, I had already made a connection with Merid-Nunda and with Azura, as well as others, and I misinterpreted what I was feeling, and let down my guard. I was not alarmed immediately, since the connections with the Daedra, while intense, were brief, and faded quickly. I was mistaken. This connection may yet fade."

He makes connections with Daedra. Merid-Nunda again. Most do not even know that name for Meridia. And Azura. Potema chose him. Other Daedra have chosen him. He is some sort of conduit. A revenant. I do not have the words to describe what he is. He has access to a plane I cannot describe. He is kneeling right next to me, holding a bath robe around me. 

He is too close. 

I cannot talk. 

I cannot breathe. 

I cannot take my eyes off him.

"I do not want it to fade." I managed to say, almost a plea, in the barest whisper of voice I could manage as I held his gaze with mine.

He smiled, squeezed my shoulders, and gazed back. "All things ultimately fade." 

"I do not know what to do." I said

"Ask your heart what to do. Then ask your head. The two, consulted together, are usually trustworthy."

We got to our feet. He adjusted the bath robe around me. "Rest" he said, "We can talk in the morning".

Lydia was waiting as I went downstairs. She must have wondered what was taking so long. How much had she heard? I prepared myself for a harsh look, or a harsh word. But the look and the word were neither. 

"Goodnight." was all she said.


	8. Heimdall Aric Belrud Aamutähti

**23rd of Sun's Dawn**

From Whiterun to Riverwood to Helgen, retracing our journey from there through Haemar's Pass and past my adopted shack, where we stopped briefly. The chickens where nowhere to be seen. Probably ending up as a meal for wolves. And the rabbits had decimated my garden. Aside from that, everything else seemed the same. I visited Railius and sat with him for a short time. Sara picked some flowers and laid them on his grave. Aric found a stone and used a spell to cut runes that I did not recognize into it, then stood the stone at the head of the grave. "What does those symbols mean?" I asked. "They mean 'Beloved Father'" he said. "Thank you. I don't recognize the language" I said. "Not many would" was all he said.

I collected a few more things from the shack, took a final look around and then we continued. Passing through Ivarstead, on our way to Riften, I thought I recognized a face. Two faces. Most of the villagers were not paying us any attention. They were used to pilgrims arriving to climb the seven-thousand steps. These two were giving us their undivided attention. The vampire rode up next to Aric and said something and he nodded as he casually glanced in their direction. So, it was not just me. She had noticed as well.

Sometime later during a brief rest stop I noticed that she was missing. She had not taken her horse. I mentioned it to Sara, and we went together to talk to her father. "She will be back before long. We don't want to tarry here."

"They are keeping out of sight, but they are definitely there, the two from Ivarstead, and three friends." Serana said when she returned.

Aric asked me "Could they belong to the group that attacked you?"

"Anyone could be part of the group that attacked me." I replied.

"They are not vampire hunters" Serana said "so it's not me they are after."

"I have not traveled the Rift enough to make the kind of acquaintance that would follow us like this." Aric said

"So, it must be me they are after." Sara joked

"You are at the age where you like the attention of boys." her Father joked back

"Papa!" she objected.

"We need to question them to find out if they are employed by anyone, or just opportunists." Aric said

"I could go back and kill two of them before they ever saw me. The remaining three would run. It would be simple." Serana said

"They can't answer your questions if they are dead." I replied.

"I have nothing to ask them. They would be your questions." Serana said

"I can raise them, but neither of them would be able to speak, let alone answer questions. Can you do that?" I asked

"Not reliably." she answered “And we would only get the one attempt. I could try with one, but if I fail, we will need a better practitioner to try with the other."

"Morryn could do it." Aric said.

"My mother could do it." Serana replied.

Serana had mentioned her family. My skin crawled thinking of being anywhere near her mother.

"Your mother is in the Soul Cairn. Morryn is in Markath. Which would you prefer to visit?" Aric asked

I am not a novitiate. I had excellent instructors. I had never seen or heard of anyone who could raise the dead and ask them questions and expect answers back. This was beyond mastery of Necromancy. 

"If we killed them now would she be willing and able to get here in time? Does time matter?" I asked

"We have time, but it would be faster if we brought them to her." Serana said

"Traveling from Riften to Markath with a cart containing two bodies would not go unnoticed." Aric said

"You can talk your way out of anything." Serana said

"We can't count on everyone that asks being a woman." Sara said with a smile

"Remember that you are not too big for me to put across my knee." her Father replied

"We could kill them all and then you could practice more." Sara said to Serana with a smirk.

Serana gave her a look. Then her look changed. "It's not the worst idea." she said to Aric

"We need to make them think they have the upper hand, so they attack us." I said. "Then none of them will escape."

"Can't you just fly to Markath and bring Morryn back?" Sara asked Serana

"Where do you get these ideas?" Serana asked her

"If Nox were to just ride up to them on her own and ask them what they want it would certainly confuse them." Sara suggested “That might give us an advantage.”

"It would confuse all of us." Serana replied

"They would fill her with arrows from a safe distance. I am not risking her." Aric said

"Not her." Sara replied.

He was about to speak but stopped himself before saying "I am not risking you either."

"Not me." she said

You could see it dawn on him "I do not want to become a woman."

"It's just an illusion!" Sara said

"No, it's not! It's more than that, and afterwards it takes a day before my clothes feel like they fit correctly!"

"I will give you all the gold in my purse if you will sleep with me as a woman." Serana almost whispered

"You are not helping!" he said to her.

"If we keep standing here talking about it, they are going to get bored and leave." She said

"What can they possible think we are doing? They can see us, can't they?" Sara asked

"All they can see right now are the horses, which are between us and them. When the horses start to move so will they." Serana answered.

"I know what we are going to do" Aric said. 

* * *

In the end it was not that difficult. A mirror imaging spell sent five illusions of us off on horseback. They would not stand up to scrutiny, and they would not last long, but they were enough. Aric used a mass invisibility spell and we picked a place where the distorted sunlight would not alert them to our presence. The closer they got the more convinced I became that they were part of the same group. The same look, the same smell, the same weapons.

Serana went through the rearmost two like a scythe, but she did not kill them immediately. Sara paralyzed the front two whom I quickly killed. Aric dispatched the one in the middle. No large wounds above the chest was the instruction.

I tried not to pay attention to what Serana was doing, but the screams were hard to ignore.

No _large_ wounds above the chest was the instruction.

* * *

"Your third attempt was so much better than your second." Sara was saying to Serana after we had resumed our ride. "It took less practice than you thought".

"It was a good idea you had, even though I know you meant it as a joke." Serana replied.

"You know I would not joke with you if I did not care about you." Sara said.

"I know. And you know I care about you; and I would eat the heart of anyone who hurt you." Serana said

Anyone who did not know her, or what she was, would take that for a figure of speech.

I knew she was in deadly earnest and I shuddered, which of course she noticed. She smiled at me, which did not help.

"What do you think they will do when they get your message?" Sara asked her Father.

"They will recognize their dilemma. They cannot deny the attack occurred, we have too much evidence. They will have to deny any involvement, and say that their men acted without orders, or acknowledge the attack but claim that I was not the intended target. That will require an explanation that they will not want to provide. They will have to choose between Jarl's Justice or Guild Justice, or Justice I deliver personally." he replied

"Guild?" Sara asked

"Assassins Guild" Aric answered.

"Really?" she asked

"Yes. I know someone in the Guild. Technically speaking, I am in the guild myself." he said

"You are an assassin?" I asked him. It ran counter to everything I thought I knew about him.

"No. It's complicated. I am an initiate only. I have never been given a contract. I would never accept one if offered. They will not press the issue, since I know where they are located, and they know what would happen if we became enemies. But they would certainly take my gold if I contracted them to avenge this attack, whoever the intended target was. They will accept a contract on anyone if the price is right."

The message was not subtle, attached to the remaining two bandits with an arrow. 

_"Aric, Thane of Haafingar, Eastmarch, the Pale, Whiterun and the Reach, in response to an unprovoked and cowardly attack on his person and his family, invokes his Right to Lex Talionis, either by his own hand, by proxy, or by Jarl's Justice. The identified perpetrator responsible for this attack, having been delivered a token marking him for retribution, will have a sennight to deliver himself to the Jarl of any hold aforementioned and present this charge, make a full voluntary confession and submit to Jarl's Justice. After that time, retribution will be delivered by other means._

_Executed by my hand this twenty-third day of Sun's Dawn in the two-hundred-thirteenth year of the Forth Era._

_Heimdall Aric Belrud Aamutähti"_

"That's whole thing is your name?" Serana asked

"Yes" he replied

"It takes half an hour to say all of that." she said

"What if he just runs?" Sara asked.

"Then we post a bounty for his live capture and return." Aric replied. "A bounty large enough that his own men will turn him in".

Two corpses tied to their own horses. Two messages attached. Five horses sent on their way. He did not even need to use a spell. 

I had seen his way with horses on every ride, but I had not realized how far it went.

He didn't need to use words when he simply told them "Go home", but he seemed to like talking to them and they seemed to like listening. 

They walked off in one direction and we rode off in the other.

Heimdall Aric Belrud Aamutähti

Aric

What fantasy world have I been living in? 

We were a small order. 

We were not criminals. 

We were not cruel.

We gave alms to the poor and fed the hungry.

We performed good works.

But we worshiped someone who the rest of Skyrim thought was completely evil.

So, we hid who we were while we waited for our Queen's return. 

We thought we were righteous. 

We thought we were powerful. 

We thought we were the chosen, that our ascendancy would begin a new age in Skyrim, a better age for all men. 

Are all cloisters so naive? 

I have witnessed Necromancy so far advanced from anything I know that it should be called something else. 

I have witnessed Innate ability and power that I do not have the words to describe.

The return of Dragons, and a " _Man_ " that captures them. That speaks to them. That can kill them single handed.

A Man that has connected to Daedra and to my dead Queen. And to me.

We were children playing with burning twigs compared to this firestorm. 

We ride quietly. I do not know what I feel towards him. I do not know what he feels towards me, but as I think of him, he turns and looks at me and my face becomes hot. 

I am in company of him

I am in awe of him

I am scared to death of him

He turns back, removes a gauntlet, and caresses his horses' neck, leans forward, and speaks softly to her. His horse's ears prick up, her tail swishes. 

I begin to know how she feels.

* * *

He was the largest person I had ever seen. He was like a mountain with legs. His name was Maul, and I am not sure if he and Aric were friends, but they talked for some time in low tones that could not be overheard, assisted by the look that Maul gave anyone who approached them. We found Mjoll, known as the Lioness, next. I could see why. A Nord. Tall. Warrior. The Look. Gods’ blood. Another conversation in low tones. Maul and Mjoll. Aric rejoined us mere mortals. "They represent two completely different Riftens. If they cannot uncover information on what the Thalmor are doing it is because that information does not exist."

He owed a visit to the Jarl of Riften. I had not been to Riften since the Empire took possession, but I knew Maven Black-Briar's reputation and I wanted to stay as far away from her as possible. 

We took two rooms in the local Inn and waited for Aric to return. He was not gone long, though long enough for several men to offer to buy us drinks. It seems that the Jarl was only able to spare him a few minutes. I did not think he would be allowed to escape that easily, but when the summons came it was not from Maven Black-Briar, but her daughter Ingun, and it was made in person. She was not much older than Sara, and one look at her told you what she had on her mind. Gods give me strength. Mjoll, Ingun, that women standing there leaning against the wall who was almost certainly a member of the thieves’ guild and looking like she would knife Ingun Black-Briar with pleasure. I am not a prude. I enjoy physical pleasure as much as the next person. 

Unless, apparently, the next person is Heimdall Aric Belrud Aamutähti.

* * *

The first half of the ride to Windhelm it rained. The second half it snowed. Typical Skyrim weather. We would have been wet and miserable except for the Alteration spell Aric used on our cloaks to repel water and to keep them warm. I mentioned to Sara that I would like to learn those spells (he used a combined spell, but that was him) and she offered to teach them to me if I taught her my bound weapons spells.

The weather meant that there was not much traffic, and the local bandits apparently do not know any spells to stay dry and warm, and we encountered none. A long ride with plenty of time to talk so I took the opportunity to ride next to him. You would think after yesterday that I would want to talk about the man who had ordered me killed and my head brought to him, but:

"So. Ingun Black-Briar." I started

"Yes" was all he said

"She is young" I continued

"She is" he answered

"Ingun, not Maven?"

"It's complicated"

"If you keep starting your explanations with 'it's complicated' it is going to lose its affect"

He laughs. "She mixed a love potion for a man in Riften. He took it to the Hagravens in Darklight Tower and they corrupted it. He was giving it to women in Riften. We met an imperial mage at the tower that gave us the antidote recipe, a crucial ingredient of which was uncorrupted physical love. Ingun was one of the women. It was to free her."

Darklight Tower. It should not have made my heart jump, that bit of my old life appearing, but it did. But I continued: 

"You said women. Plural."

"Yes."

"The Lioness?"

"Yes"

"The thief in the Inn?"

"Sapphire, yes".

"No one else?"

"Not that I am aware. If there are, Ingun or one of the others will tell them what they need to do. Uncorrupted physical love and a visit to the Temple of Mara for her blessing."

I changed direction. "You said Darklight Tower"

"I did. The imperial mage we met was trying to save her mother from a Hagraven ritual. We tried to help, but her mother was too far gone. She killed her mother. Helping her was the condition for her giving us the cure."

"Morryn was able to be saved" I said.

"Morryn wanted to be saved. Illia's mother did not." he explained.

"When I asked you to take me there you did not mention this." I said

"True. I thought it a moot point compared to my news about the Wolf Queen."

"So, my mission was pointless. If I had arrived at the tower beforehand, you would not have been able to tell us apart, and I would have died. If I had arrived afterwards, there would have been no one to receive my message, and no point in delivering it".

"I remember what you wrote. They were a Hagraven cult, and they would have killed you or died in the attempt. They would never have joined you and believe me when I say you would not have wanted them. " he said

He was silent for a moment, and then said "I did not have the opportunity to know the other members of your order. They were defending their Queen, and did so bravely, buying time with their lives in hope, I am sure, that the ritual could be completed before we could stop it. They gave me no choice. I did not grieve for them at the time. But I do now, knowing you. If they were anything like you then their deaths are a great loss and a great waste. I barely know you and already the thought of losing you sickens me. Their loss, and my part in it, leaves me with a bitter taste in my mouth. I beg your pardon, and I ask your forgiveness. But I believe that Potema knew of my existence well before we met in Wolfskull Cave. The ritual had not yet been completed, but she had already become very strong. Serana can tell you the details of the final battle in the Catacombs, how we were a hair's breadth from failing. She called me to that cave. She called me to the catacombs. She called me to you. And she sent you away, on a mission that was already pointless, to keep you from harm, so we could meet. What her purpose was, that will reveal itself in time."

At some point I realized I was crying, that my face was wet, and not from the rain. If I attempted to speak, I was afraid it would be to wail. We rode silently, listening to the rain, and the sound of the wind. It was some time before I was confident enough to say "I pardon you readily, but there is nothing to forgive. It seems we have all been actors in a play written and staged by powers greater than us. We had no choice but to play our parts."

"Thank you." he said Then after a moment "Blessings of the Divines for your kindness." 

I smiled and laughed as he reminded me of another part I had recently begun to play, and we rode on in silence.

We arrived in Windhelm too late for him to visit the Jarl. I asked him how he knew Jarl Ulfric and he gave me a look and we both said at the same time "It's complicated". Which made him smile and me laugh. His daughters Sophie and Collette were asleep when we arrived, as was his Housecarl who, to my surprise, seemed immune to his charms when she came out at the sound of our arrival. Are Wood Elves immune? His daughters were not far behind, and it was greetings and hugs and introductions and "Blessing of the Divines for your hospitality" which got me a look from Aric and the barest smile.

We were all tired but not too tired for a bath and a small meal before everyone found their beds and very welcome sleep.


	9. The token begins it's journey

**4th of First Seed**

A late rise on a sunny, brisk day. Sara and I were the last two to rise. Aric and Serana were gone, Aric to confer with Jarl Ulfric, Serana to wherever Serana goes when she disappears without a word. Collette and Sophie were enjoying the comfortable silence only available to sisters or very old friends; the remains of their breakfast not yet cleared away. The sound of hammering was a constant background noise. A plump, happy Nord woman was removing fresh bread from the oven as we were walking into the kitchen. "Niina, this is Noxaura, a friend of mine from Solitude" Sara said. Niina smiled as she wiped flower from her apron. "Milady" she said to me, then to Sara "I will bring your breakfast out to the dining room, Miss, if you will carry the teapot". Fresh bread, butter, snowberry preserves, and tea. Sophie and Collette did not seem to have the same relationship with Sara that Lucia and Runa did. Not unusual in a family that large, with large gaps in age between groups of children. They naturally form smaller groups. 

After breakfast Sara and I bundled up and wandered around Windhelm. It was the first time we had been alone in a while, and Sara's first chance to ask, "How are you?".

"It is too early to tell." I said. "I have much to sort out, and to consider once the sorting is completed."

"Your conversation with Father yesterday upset you. I could see that". she said.

"I think it upset him just as much though, of course, he didn't cry as I did."

"Why 'of course'?" she asked, with a bit of a tone to her words.

"I meant no offense. I should have said 'naturally' rather than 'of course'."

"You think it is not in his nature to cry?" She asked me.

“You described him mourning the dying brigand.” I said. “So, I know he is capable of shedding tears. “

"Do you think less of him for it?" she asked.

"What are we talking about?" I asked

"We are talking about my father. I don't want you to misunderstand him." Sara said.

I had no idea how I stumble into this quagmire. 

"I do not know him well enough to understand him, let alone misunderstand him." We were both quiet for a moment before I asked,

"Is my opinion important?"

"It is to me and, I think, to him." she said

"Then I should speak plainly and tell you that I spent most of the ride to Dragon's Bridge planning how to kill Your father." I told her.

She kept walking and said "That is understandable considering the news he gave you, and his role in it. Every one of us that Papa adopted began our journey with pain and grief and ended it with falling in love with him; As did Jarl Elisif."

"Jarl Elisif?" I asked, feigning ignorance about her frequent visits.

"She started by giving him a task as she mourned her dead husband. She ended by giving him her wedding ring, which he wears on a chain around his neck."

I had seen the chain, and the ring. "Your father and the Jarl are married?" I asked, my heartbeat pounding in my ears.

"No. She is a Nord and the rightful High Queen of Skyrim. She cannot claim that title if she marries a non-Nord. The people would never support her claim, and the Empire relies on the support she has from the Nords. She and Papa both understand their responsibilities." She looked at me and smiled as she said, "And that is why I do not get to live in a palace."

I did not know what to say to that, nor why I felt such a sense of relief.

“But Your father and Lydia clearly love each other.” I said.

She laughed. "Yes. At the risk of sounding like my father, 'it's complicated'."

"I think we have worn that phrase out. We are going to have to find another." I said

Sara laughed, then stopped. She wrapped her arms around me, and gave me a hug, pressing her cheek against mine. "You could become my sister, and we could love him together." she said

I hugged her back, and we continued our walk.

"Your father is friends with quite a few Jarls." I finally said

"Father is not really friends with Jarl Ulfric. They know each other from a long time ago, before he adopted any of us. But he never talks about him, and only visits him on official matters." Sara answered.

"Would you care to guess what he said when I asked him how he knows Jarl Ulfric?" I asked

She laughed and bumped my shoulder with hers.

When we returned home, Aric was back. Serana was still away. After lunch, Aric mentioned that he was going to buy ingredients from the Apothecary and asked me to go with him. Along the way he said he wished to arrange a memorial service for the members of my order who died in Wolfskull Cave and asked if I objected. I said I did not, and he asked if I could provide a list of names of those who died. We were not a large sect, and I knew everyone so it would not be difficult. 

I told him I could if he wished it. He said he did. That afternoon I wrote the list and he took it to the Hall of the Dead. When he came back, he said the service was arranged for tomorrow evening. The local head Priest was aware that our sect did not worship Talos and was happy to provide the traditional memorial service of Talos, but requested that I be present as a Priestess of my order to read the names and offer our own traditional prayer for the dead. He asked me if that would be a problem, and I told him I could do it. But then I said

"This is very kind of you. I know it is not for me that you are doing this but thank you all the same."

"It is true, that it is not only for you that I do this, but you are part of why I am doing it." 

"The memorial service will be tomorrow night, and every year on the 5th of First Seed, and every year on the anniversary of their deaths. I could not recall that date exactly, but it was some time during the beginning of the month of Evening Star, so I chose the 1st of Evening Star. Your Order will be remembered, their names read, and the rites you chose to celebrate tomorrow offered on that date every year for one-hundred years." he said

My mouth hung open for a moment. "One-hundred years" was all I could say.

"Yes. I had to choose a number of years, and it was the first one to occur to me. "

I looked at him, and he looked back and smiled warmly, then looked down at his hands. I took that as a sign that it was time to go and write a memorial that would stand the test of time. I thanked him and left. As I walked down the hall and rounded the corner to walk down the stairs, I glanced back at him, and he was looking back.

There were two men waiting when I returned downstairs, seated in a small nook. Each had a goblet. Each ignored the other. Each as different from the other as it is possible for two men to be. One was a tradesman. The other was a walking shadow in dress and manner. The tradesman was clearly not comfortable being this close to the shadow. The shadow sat so still he could have been carved from stone. The housecarl made no effort to hide the fact that she was watching the shadow like a hawk watching a falcon. Aric walked slowly down the stairs, casually greeted the tradesman as "master goldsmith". The goldsmith returned the greeting "Honored Thane. As you requested. They turned out better than I expected." and handed Aric two gold coins. Aric inspected them and said "Excellent craftsmanship. Thank you for producing them so quickly". The craftsman thanked him for his generosity and left. Aric inspected the coins further before handing one to the shadow, together with a slip of parchment. Without any form of acknowledgement, the shadow left.

The housecarl finally relaxed. Sara walked out of the kitchen. It seems that there was more than one shadow present; I never noticed her presence.

"The Token begins its journey" Aric said and tossed the other coin to Sara who inspected it and then tossed it to me. On one side was the likeness of a dragon. On the other was a glyph I did not recognize.

He did not wait for me to ask. "The dragon symbol resembles the dragon symbol present in Sky Haven Temple. There is almost no one alive who has seen that symbol. The other symbol represents my name. While I appeared to be choosing which token to send, I placed an enchantment on one token. I will know when it touches the hand that hired the men that attacked you."

"I have never heard of a spell or enchantment like that" I said.

"That is because it is neither. I refer to it as an enchantment for simplicity. There is no word in any language you would know that would describe what it truly is." he answered.

He was a revenant. Any doubt I had vanished in that moment. Who are you? Who were you?

"Who was that who took the token with him?" Sara asked.

He cocked his head as he looked at her in a manner that caused her to roll her eyes and say, "forget I asked".

The door opened as Serena reappeared and said, "I just passed someone who seemed to be coming from this direction. I did not like the look of him at all."

* * *

Windhelm to Winterhold, with a stop at the Shrine of Azura for Aric to pay his respects to one of his patron Daedra, and her Priestess who kept watch at her temple. She greeted me as a fellow Priestess and was pleased when I asked if I could pay homage to Azura and if she could teach me the ritual. Then on to Winterhold and a conference with the Jarl before the long walk up to the College, after which it was "Archmage this" and "Archmage that" and "Archmage please approve my research" and "Archmage she is undermining my authority" until it was "Papa!", which was how I met Delphine, Aric's youngest daughter. Hugs and screaming between the two sisters. Greetings to Sara from her former instructors, and from students she knew. But as senior instructors gathered the tone turned serious. 

"Under no circumstances allow any Thalmor onto college grounds. Ward the entire perimeter." Aric said. 

Stunned silence, broken finally. "That will take considerable strength and energy" one instructor wearing the robes of a Master said.

"We have enough of both." Aric replied.

There were several high elves present. Their looks of concern were plain, as were the glances they were receiving from others. Aric raised his voice so all present could hear.

"We are all members of this college; this is our family.” He said. “Anyone who attempts to harm a member of this family will deeply regret it." 

There were several sets of wide eyes and serious expressions, but also several nods of agreement. 

"This is only a precaution.” He said. “Classes are cancelled for the remainder of the day. We will prepare, and then place our wards. This is an excellent opportunity for junior students to receive instruction and ample practice. Senior staff will instruct and inspect all wards afterwards. When we have finished, we will have a communal meal in the great hall."

Archmage. He is Archmage of the College of Winterhold. I should not have been surprised, but I was. 

Archmage, Companion, Dragonborn, Thane. 

During the meal, once the tension had been broken, there was laughing and joking and the Camaraderie of the Chosen that I recognized so well, and that made my throat tighten as I remembered reading twelve names. Names of mem and women with whom I had shared laughs and jokes, sure of our ascendancy, our supremacy. Would someone walk in here and silence these laughs and jokes? Would someone read the names of those assembled here on some evening in the future, for the next one-hundred years? I looked across the table at Sara and Delphine holding court with other students, at Aric, talking to a High Elf wearing Adept Restoration robes, and his words echoed in my mind: 

"Anyone who attempts to harm a member of this family will deeply regret it." I pitied anyone who tried.

* * *

It was on the road to Dawnstar when he stopped and waited for the rest of us to catch up before saying "Our Token is delivered".

We all just sat on our horses, not saying anything. We were all surely thinking the same thing, but it was Aric who spoke the words.

"Seven Days."


	10. We commit the keeping of their souls

**10th of First Seed**

I began to question Aric's choice of route yesterday. I am sure that Serana had started the day before. Winterhold to Dawnstar is bad enough, but for us it had been Windhelm to Winterhold to Dawnstar, the coldest route that could be chosen in Skyrim, and we had chosen it in Winter. It seemed to me that no amount of Alteration spells could keep me warm enough. We persisted though, and arrived, late again, and no bath to warm us up; but welcome, and food and wine by a warm fire in a warm Inn and the pleasant noise of meaningless local gossip. Absolutely nothing about the Thalmor. Dawnstar to Morthal, and no surprise that Morthal was also devoid of news of any Thalmor activity, given their isolated location deep in the marsh, and their dense shroud of fog. We were all happy though, anticipating our arrival in Solitude once again, and a break of several days before the journey continued again: a long ride to Markath before heading back to Whiterun. Serana had not accompanied us from Dawnstar. Morthal had recent vampire problems, and she did not want to cause trouble or, I am sure, endure the inevitable looks and glances. She set off on her own directly for Solitude. You would have thought she was a child the way Sara acted the morning our paths diverged.

"Do you have everything you need? Will you be safe on your own? You won't be lonely on the road by yourself?" Sara fussed

"I have traveled Skyrim alone before, you know. I will be fine." Serana reassured her with a smile.

"I am just worried for you. I know you can take care of yourself." Sara said.

"We will meet again soon enough." Serana answered as the two hugged.

Just the three of us then, from Dawnstar to Morthal. No one seemed to want to talk about anything more serious than the weather, which had certainly improved. Where we could we rode three abreast, with Aric in the middle. I stole glances at him when I thought it was safe. It was not always, and occasionally he would catch me. But he would just smile, as his eyes caught mine. The first time it happened I felt embarrassed. The second time, I held his gaze for longer, and he did not look away, and his smile became something else. Something that made me forget the cold. 

It seemed that Sara had adopted me to be a surrogate sister. We would braid each other's hair before climbing into our shared bed; to talk in whispers about whatever came to mind before we fell asleep. Sara would invariably fall asleep first, as my mind tried to process what was happening to me, and to predict what the future would hold. When I slept my dreams were filled with my lost brothers and sisters, my shack, the mine, and Aric. Sara was blessed with the gift of youth and slept like the dead. It seemed like nothing affected her sleep. She had been in the same mine as I had. She had ambushed the same bandits I had, heard the same screams that I had. 

But she still had her family. Her deity was alive and well and asleep in the next room; by himself tonight, which seemed a rare occurrence. What would he do if I slipped out of my bed and into his room, and under his blankets? He would act kindly, and speak kindly, and cuddle me like he would one of his daughters, talking to me in that warm, reassuring tone that I have come to associate with him about how cold my feet were, and that I needed my rest, and then eventually send me back to my own shared bed. "Big girls have to learn to sleep in their own beds". It would kill something inside of me that had just begun to grow. Or would he choose another path? I remember his words, and the sound of his voice, and how it caught when he said, "The thought of losing you makes me sick." I remember how he had held my gaze, and the way he looked at me. Would he really treat me like a child, like one of his daughters? I fell asleep imagining a different reaction. When I finally slept, my dreams were of Aric. Sara never stirred. Really, she can sleep through anything. 

* * *

It was not quite midday when we saw them. Bandits, looting a cart. Dead horse, dead man, dead woman. Four of them against three of us, and one of us a teenage girl. They looked at us, calculated their odds of success, and charged at us. Unfortunately for them, none of them had a head for mathematics. When it was over some of them had no heads at all. Aric checked the man and woman. At least it had been quick for both. None of the additional horror that is so common in Skyrim now, with the civil war raging, and all veneer of civilization stripped away. Neither of them was much older than Lucia. A young couple with all their possessions in a cart, heading off to their new life. A life cut short by these three men and one woman, of various age. He stood over the young woman for a few moments, possible picturing one of his daughters in place of this nameless victim. I walked up next to him and placed my hand on his arm. He put his hand over mine, and them we both heard it, the sound from just over there, behind a fallen tree. A rustling, and a sob. Sara was closer, and quicker than we were. 

She was there in a moment, at the ready. But she quickly lay down her staff and speaking softly with her hands outstretch said. "Don't be scared. I won't hurt you. Those men cannot hurt you anymore. No one will hurt you." by then Aric and I were with her, looking at a little girl whose was hiding behind the fallen tree. 

"My name is Sara. This is my friend Noxaura, and this is my father. Can you tell me your name?" 

The little girl was clearly in shock, but "Gwendolen" was her answer in a clear, questioning voice. She kept her eyes locked on Aric, and the question in her voice was clear: are you going to hurt me like those men hurt my mother and father? Aric knelt and removed his gauntlets. 

He said "Hello Gwendolen, my name is Aric. Are you hurt?" Gwendolen shook her head, eyes wide, never looking away. 

"Gwendolen, is this your mother and father, and your cart and horse?" 

A quick nod, then she said "Our horse is named Petre. She likes apples. Papa lets me feed her and pet her nose." 

She could not have been much more than six or seven years old. "I want my Mama and Papa." she said. "I want to go home."

"I will bring you to your Mama and Papa. Would you wait with Sara and Noxaura for a moment?" he asked.

Another quick nod, and he got up as Sara said "Gwendolen, may I brush the twigs out of your hair?" She seemed to always be armed with a hairbrush. She brushed Gwendolen's hair slowly and spoke to her about her favorite horses while Aric arranged her parents, so they looked like they were simply sleeping, covering their wounds, and cleaning their faces. The bandits he left like they were. When he had finished Sara picked Gwendolen up and brought her to see her parents. She was young, but there was no need to explain that her parents would never wake from this long sleep. 

"Gwendolen, do you have anyone who can take care of you?" Aric asked. A shake of her head, and tears were enough of an answer. 

"Gwendolen, would you ride with Sara on her horse? His name is Pan, and he likes carrots and oats." A nod and Sara took Gwendolen to meet Pan and they talked about horses as Aric raised two of the dead bandits to dig graves for these young parents. 

"Would you please say some words for them?" Aric asked me. He had killed more than his share in the mine and afterwards, and I had not seen it affect him the way these two deaths did. 

"Of course." I said, "Would you stay with me?" I asked. He knelt, and his vision seemed to unfocus as I recited the Rite of Passage; the same rite I had recited for my lost Queen. 

I glanced at him as I was speaking the words "we commit the keeping of their souls unto the Creators" and I could see the tears dropping onto the ground, an offering to these two departed souls. He stood when I had finished but did not wipe the tears from his face. His vision focused once again as he looked at the graves, his face a mask once again. 

I walked up to him and caught his hands in mine. The Priestess comforting the grieving. "Thank you." was all he said.

The bandits we left where they had fallen, for the carrion eaters and predators.

* * *

Progress was slower with Sara and Gwendolen riding double. Sara kept up a constant patter talking to her, meaningless, comfortable talk. An occasional question that would illicit a "yes" or "no" answer from Gwendolen, Sara's arms, and cloak around her. "Eleven children now" I thought. He was going to need a larger house. When Delphine and Hroar returned home Every bed in their house in Solitude would be filled once again. The silence broke me out of my thoughts. The constant patter had stopped. Aric was looking at the small bundle in Sara's arms. He said something quietly and Sara nodded.

I felt a tension building in me as we approached Dragon's Bridge. It was our first visit back after the mine and the barracks. Our handiwork had surely been discovered by now, a search conducted for the culprits. Thalmor retribution was widely, and justly, known and feared. They relied on their reputation as much as their strength to maintain their position in Tamriel. This would be a bitter defeat indeed for them. But from what Sara and Samuel had said it was not the first, they had been defeated over the length and breadth of Skyrim. This loss was certainly the largest, but it was a part of a larger whole. Their revenge would not be limited to Dragon's Bridge. 

But no one would ever suspect our role in what happened. A man, a woman, a teen-aged girl, and a child. We could be a simple family on its way home. The locals know him, but the Thalmor do not. Aric debated whether to stop or ride through. When the time finally came Gwendolen was awake again, so we enjoyed the briefest of stops while Aric went into the Empires outpost to report the attack on the small family, and Sara, Gwendolen and I visited the Inn. They were not too busy. Thalmor, yes; but only two, talking quietly and ignoring everyone else, especially three women looking for rest and food. We agreed to keep our rest short and meet Aric at the horses. 

"I reported the attack to the commanding officer. We know each other since they garrison this outpost from Solitude. I told him about the bandits and described them and how they were armed. He and the sergeant exchanged a look as I was describing them. I asked if something was amiss. They said that a group of bandits and a group of Thalmor had killed each other in a nearby mine."

"All the bandits in the mine were dead when we arrived. The Thalmor had seen to that themselves." Sara said.

"That does not seem to be common knowledge." Aric said. "The Empire, at least, is attributing the Thalmor deaths to a large bandit attack on the gold mine. There is some logic to drawing that conclusion. It is a target that would draw a large group of bandits. And from the documents we found on the Thalmor officers, they were keeping every detail of their operations a secret from the Empire. It is possible that they consider this matter closed, that everyone involved is dead."

"Did they reach their conclusion themselves, or did the Thalmor provide it for them?" Sara asked

"Do you want me to go back and ask?" Aric asked with a smile

"Absolutely not" she replied.

"Can I pet Pan's neck?" Gwendolen asked.

"Of course, chick." Sara said. She held and steadied her as Gwendolen leaned forward and lay on Pan's neck, stroked his neck, and sang him a child's song about farm animals.

We rode quietly, listening to Gwendolen sing.


	11. The obvious requires no explanation

**13th of First Seed**

_Petition for Custodianship -_

_Aric, Thane of Haafingar, petitions Elisif, Jarl of Solitude, to be appointed Custodian of Gwendolen, a minor Breton female child, who was orphaned as a result of a bandit attack on the 11th day of First Seed on the main road from Morthal to Dragon's Bridge. Since this attack was perpetrated in Haafingar proper, Jarl Elisif is the authority having jurisdiction, and it is to her we submit our petition. Said Custodianship to continue until a blood relative is identified that is willing to assume responsibility for the proper care and upbringing of said minor child, and who can demonstrate sufficient means._

_Submitted by my hand this 13th day of First Seed, in the two-hundred- thirteenth year of the Forth Era._

_Heimdall Aric Belrud Aamutähti, Thane of Haafingar_

It was only a formality we were assured. Assured by the Jarl herself who, rather than responding to the quickly written note that Aric sent upon our arrival, arrived in person to see the newly orphaned girl. The Orphan Jarl meeting someone with who she shared much.

"Elisif the Fair." "Elisif the Beautiful" was more appropriate. She arrived with no fanfare. Jordis bent the knee, Sara curtsied and received and returned a hug, a kiss, a smile, and an 'are you well?'. I had changed out of my Priestess disguise, wearing something that had belonged to Lucia, which could not help but be too long. My curtsy was not as practiced as Sara's, who made introductions. The Jarl was very gracious and welcomed me to Solitude. "Thank you, your grace." was my only response, though I had been to Solitude many times. No feigned blessings to this Jarl, who seemed to have genuine blessings in abundance; one of which was descending the stairs, holding Gwendolen's hand, followed by Blaise and Alesan.

"So, this is our poor waif." the Jarl said. She removed her gloves as she knelt on the floor in her court finery. "Hello. My name is Elisif. What is your name?"

A short conversation between the two orphans. "Do you know where they came from, or where they were going?" she asked Aric.

"No. They certainly had not started their journey in Morthal. And their destination could have been anywhere. We delayed long enough to bury her parents, but not to search their cart for clues. It would have upset her." 

"The bandits?" she asked.

"Dead." he answered.

"Good." she said, her voice like flint. "I will light candles and pray for the souls of her parents." She stood and put on her gloves. "Gwendolen, it was a pleasure meeting you. I hope you will visit me in the palace. Have you ever visited a palace?" she asked. Wide eyes, and a shake of her head. "Well" said the Jarl "we shall have to remedy that." She turned to Aric and stood very close, placing a hand on his arm. "Send your petition tomorrow." she said softly. Her voice was music. Everything about her was regal. Except her manner with Gwendolen, and with Sara. And with Aric. There seemed to be a special form of gravity between the two that they both had to resist if they were not to end up pressed together.

"You will have it tomorrow morning. It has been some time since I have written one, but I think I can remember the form." he answered, their eyes never parting.

"The form is not important, so long as your name is affixed to it." she said. "I will approve whatever petition you send me immediately."

"Best to read it first. You do not know what I may ask." he said with a smile

"There is nothing I would deny you if you asked. Nothing." she said, as her hand moved to his chest and her face closer to his. But gravity did not prevail, and they parted; Elisif back to her duties, Aric to arrange for care for Gwendolen, and to write his petition.

I would have had to be stone deaf to not hear the yearning in her words. My face was hot, and I there was a constriction in my throat. "I am not jealous. I have no right to be jealous." It was like a mantra, a prayer, repeated silently in my mind.

Why could the Jarl of Solitude not have been a man?

**14th of First Seed**

_Order Granting Custodianship-_

_Elisif, Jarl of Solitude, by my hand and by my Right as Jarl having Authority of Jurisdiction in Haafingar, grants Custody of Gwendolen, a minor female child, to Aric, Thane of Haafingar, until such time a blood relative is identified that is willing to assume responsibility for the proper care and upbringing of said minor child, and who can demonstrate sufficient means._

_So ordered this 13th day of First Seed, in the two-hundred- thirteenth year of the Forth Era._

_Elisif Kirste Morgana Asgansen, Jarl of Solitude_

We were surprised upon arriving in Solitude to not find Serana's horse. Katia said she had not seen Serana since our departure. Our concern grew when the day of our departure arrived and still, she had not returned. "She is no babe-in-the-woods." Aric said to Sara. "She will find us when she wishes to."

Sara was staying in Solitude. No surprise that she and Gwendolen had bonded. It was Sara's nature to be caring, and Gwendolen had not left her side on the trip here. Blaise and Alesen's old nurse arrived with her young daughter: Sille the older and Sille the younger. It was the younger who would care for Gwendolen, once they came to know each other. Until then, it seemed that Sara and Gwendolen were joined, right hand to left. 

"You have a responsibility to her, greater than you have to me or any other presently. Once she is comfortable with Sille you may consider other responsibilities." Aric instructed her.

"I understand Papa." Sara replied. Gwendolen and Sille were nearby, getting acquainted. Aric hugged Sara, kissing the top of her head. "It was not too long ago that it was you clinging to Lucia."

His home in Solitude was a popular destination for couriers.

 _Idgrod Ravencrone, Jarl of Morthal, Governing Authority of Hjaalmarch, in recognition of his services to both my person and my village and villagers, hereby appoints Aric Thane of Hjaalmarch, authorizing him to purchase property, build an Estate, and hire Retainer_ s.

"At this rate Skyrim will experience a shortage of Thaneships before long." Jordis said dramatically. “And of couriers.”

"Have you been to Morthal?" Sara asked her.

"No. The southern and southwest frontiers I know very well, but not the marshes." Jordis replied.

"You did not miss much." Sara said.

"Will you actually buy property there?" Jordis asked.

"Yes. Their economy needs the trade, and their tradesmen need the employment. I will buy as much local material and hire as many local workmen as possible. Everyone will benefit." 

Jordis and Sara were clearly skeptical, and with good reason. Fog covered marshland was not prime real estate.

"If you have a moment, I would like to speak to you" Aric said, interrupting my thoughts.

"Will this be your third attempt to be rid of me?" I asked, not completely joking.

"No, this will not be my third attempt to be rid of you, because there was never a first or second attempt." he replied, also not completely joking.

We took the opportunity to walk outside.

"The southern part of my journey begins tomorrow. Jordis will accompany me. She knows the region very well as you heard. She would never have let me set out on my own in any case, and it would have been wrong of me to place her in a position to have to violate my order to stay." He was quiet for a moment. "You, however, have no such obligation to me."

 _How can you say that?_ I thought _Are you that blind that you do not know how I feel?_

"This issue with the Thalmor is also not your responsibility." he continued. "You are free to go wherever you wish, do whatever you wish, build whatever life you wish. Any city, hold, or village in Tamriel would be fortunate to have you as a resident. And as I mentioned in Whiterun, your resources are considerable." He handed me a scroll, with a broken seal of the Jarl of Solitude. "This was delivered together with the order of custodianship.

_Jarl Elisif acknowledges receipt of a strong box which was opened and inventoried in the presence of the Jarl, her Steward, and Mage, and which contained gold coin, bullion, jewels, and gems valued at approximately 20,000 imperial gold coins. This strongbox will be held in the palace strong room as the sole personal property of the person presented to me at the home of Aric, Thane of Solitude, as Priestess Noxaura Jarnesus, an Imperial Adult Woman._

At some point I had stopped walking. This proved lucky when my legs suddenly felt weak. "Gods." was all I managed before saying "This is a royal ransom. This cannot possibly be correct."

"I assure you it is quite correct. It is one-quarter of the value of what Serana and I carried away from the mine. We have, in part, Serana's much greater strength to thank for our bounty; she carried twice what I did, even though she was adamant that she made no claim to any of it. If you saw her home, you would understand why. Sara's and my portion are added to the family wealth, in which all my family share."

"I feel like I am going to be sick." I said

"Let us sit for a moment." Aric suggested

There was a bench nearby. When I was able to speak again, I said, "It cannot be right that I should benefit for the deaths I caused, certainly not to this degree."

"It was certainly not right what the Thalmor did, attacking a legally owned mine, and killing everyone they found; even if the owner was a thief and brigand, and employed thieves and brigands to work the mine."

"I know what you must think of my order, but we were not thieves, or criminals or murderers."

"You do not know what I think of your order. I never thought you were thieves, or criminals, or murderers. I see in you the heart and soul of your order. Every moment I know you my opinion of your order grows. The worst that I can say about your order is that it was misguided. Except that something guided me to you, and you to me, so even in that I may be mistaken."

For the second time in as many minutes my legs became weak, and my ability to speak had fled. His words, the sound of his voice, affected me as much as any spell. It cannot be possible to fall in love from one second to the next, between heartbeats. Can it? I have no right to fall in love with him. He does not love me. He does not tell me so. He loves Lydia; they have raised a family together. He clearly loves Elisif. If I attempt to speak, I will say the wrong thing. If I look at him, I will do the wrong thing. I focus on my hands and say, "You are too kind, but thank you."

"There is no rush for you to decide what is right. A more urgent matter we should discuss is tomorrow. Jordis and I will depart for Markath, stopping at Karthwasten along the way. I urge you to remain here. Consider your future. You are now a very wealthy woman, with no need to risk your safety. You would most certainly be appointed Thane in any city or hold you choose as your home. Or if you wish to live more humbly and purchase land and build a home upon it as I have done, and will do again, you can enjoy a quieter life. Or open an orphanage, or a school, or a temple. You have many gifts, any of which when employed would only grow your fortune. Stay. Consider the future, and what you want most from it."

Which of my gifts would keep us together forever? I thought, indeed the wrong thing to say.

"Once again, you are too kind. But I do not need any time to decide that what I want most is to accompany you." I realized too late what tone had leaked through my words and tried to repair the damage as best I could. "I detest unfinished business. We started this journey together; we should finish it together." 

"In that case" he said with a smile "we have purchases to make." He said

* * *

**16th of First Seed**

He paid them extra, but it still took some time to finishes the dresses. No more borrowed clothes. Radiant raiment indeed, courtesy of the two sisters, one of whom I had already met, who had stood outside her shop when first we arrived and given Aric that look that I had come to know so well. The look the three of then gave each other. The three of them. Well, how...open minded... of them all. However, they make exquisite dresses, as well as very comfortable, practical travel attire. Still Radiant. Aric and Jordis had discussed what would be safer: travel the main roads as a noble couple under protection of a well-armed guard, or travel as something less refined, using the trails and paths. Jordis assured him that she could guide us to Karthwasten using mostly trails, but that we should certainly encounter bandits or foresworn. Also, if the Thalmor believed that it was bandits responsible for the attack on the mine they would certainly be scouring the countryside, looking for groups of bandits to question.

In the end, he decided on the camouflage of finery and nobility. So, a traveling dress, but a brocaded one, with gloves. And a hooded cloak that Aric warded himself.

"Endarie makes this fabric herself. How she does it she keeps a closely guarded secret. On its own, it is a simple cloak, though beautiful. But it holds an enchantment much longer and amplifies it. The one I have has not lost strength in the ten years I have owned it." Aric said

"That is impressive." I answered. "What enchantment did you use?"

"It is not an enchantment." He answered.

"Like the token?" I asked.

"Somewhat. The closest word you would understand to describe it is a 'Shaping'". He answered.

"That is not the first time you have referred to a language I would not know. You are aware that I have an education?" I asked

 _"_ _Hið augljósa þarfnast engra skýringa_ _."_ He said 

Even though he had told me, and I had believed him, it was still a shock to hear the words, the inflection, the mysterious language that almost certainly predated Tamriel.

"What did you just say?" I asked.

" _The obvious requires no explanation_."

Even in an ancient, foreign language he makes my heart race.

"Keep this cloak on at all times. There are few weapons that can penetrate it. No projectile produced by man can do so. Any spells that strike it will, up to a point, strengthen and recharge it. It is a very powerful protection."

"Where did you learn to...I do not even know how to refer to it."

"I learned to work a Shaping from my Mother." Aric answered

Aric as a child. Aric has a mother. My mind could not wrap itself around the concept of Aric being anything other than he was right now, could not picture him as any sort of child, at his mother's knee, learning anything.

"She sounds like an extraordinary woman." I said

"She was, as her mother before her was. And her father."

He became quiet afterwards, and contemplative. I took my cue, and my recent purchases, to my shared bedroom to pack for our journey. I had purchased two plain gold rings, though technically it was Aric who purchased them - purchased everything. I spent the next hour at the enchanting station that sat between the two bedrooms, enchanting each ring with a trigger spell that would trigger my bound sword spell. The affect would be immediate and endure much longer, and allow me to cast another spell simultaneously. I had used trigger spells before, but this application was inspired by watch Serana in combat. I was confident that I could do it but had not had time to practice. 

* * *

**17th of First Seed**

Even from a distance it was clear the Thalmor had called for reinforcements. They avoided the Stormcloak camp that sat just south of the main road, but their numbers increased the further we traveled; some stationary at intervals on the road, but more traveling back and forth, leaving the main road occasionally, no discernible pattern.

"There are more of them than I expected." Jordis said.

"There were not this many during our last visit." I said

"They are searching the countryside but trying to not be obvious. They are avoiding the Stormcloak camp." Aric said, "And more of them are Justiciars, not just soldiers."

"We always knew they would respond. At least they have not sacked the town." I said.

"Not with Imperial troops stationed in the town, and Stormcloaks nearby. And they understand the townsfolk did not have the means to kill two-hundred Thalmor." Aric said.

"Was it really so many?" Jordis asked him.

"Yes." he replied

"When you told me earlier, I thought you were exaggerating."

"No." he said.

"You killed two-hundred. The four of you?"

"Yes."

"That is fifty Thalmor each." she said

"Your math is unimpeachable." he said with a smile

"I'm serious." She said

"I was angry and need an outlet." I said

" I was also angry. And I was protecting Sara." Aric said

"What about Sara?" Jordis asked

"Sara was protecting all of us." Aric said

"And Serana?"

"Serana was being Serana." was all he said.

We rode through Dragon's Bridge, a noble couple with its armor-clad protection. Aric sat his horse and made his face a mask. Jordis stared down every Thalmor that made eye contact. I adopted a look and demeanor of scorn and superiority that I had recently seen up close, in abundance, while being fit for my new clothes. 

If the effect is any indication, I did a passable impression.


	12. I die here

There were fewer Thalmor as we continued south. They were almost certainly concentrating on the paths and hills around and above the gold mine. If they were not careful, they would have more than one unpleasant encounter with the Foresworn.

We had just crossed the bridge between Dragon's Bridge Overlook and Forebears' Holdout when there was a scrambling noise to our right, and a young girl about Sara's age came out from behind a small stand of trees. She was wet and crying, barely able to speak:

"Please help us. She is too heavy for me to lift." 

We had stopped at her approach, Jordis with her hand on her sword, but this soaking wet, hysterical young girl was no threat. However, in a flash Jordis had drawn her sword and was wheeling her horse, scanning both sides of the road, in a complete circle, for threat, for Thalmor, for ambush. 

"Stay with Jordis." Aric said to me as he dismounted and followed the girl up the slope to the trees. 

He was just about to disappear into the trees when I said to Jordis:

"Stay with the horses" and dismounted, following Aric's path up the slope and into the trees to find a hasty shelter made from a fallen tree and Aric kneeling by a young woman.

She did not move, and her breathing was labored. 

The young girl was saying "They kept accusing us of being bandits. We told they we were not bandits. Do we look like bandits? We hunt to help feed our family. They tried to take us with them. One of them grabbed me and Jyte killed him. Then we ran, but they chased us. She told me to keep running while she stayed behind, firing arrows at them. I climbed down the cliff edge and waited. It took a long time for her to appear, but she was already wounded, and she fell when she was trying to climb down." 

Her crying came back as a swell. I hugged her and tried to calm her as Aric looked at Jyte. 

"What is your name, child?" Aric asked her. 

"Kirsta" she said, the swell receding. "And I'm not a child." She said.

"I apologize. You remind me of my daughter. She is about your age." he said. 

Then "Kirsta, I need your help. We need to remove her cuirass and tunic so I can treat her wound. Would you help me?" 

"What can I do?" I asked.

"Bring my small apothecary satchel." He said

I ran and slid back down the slope to Aric's horse. Jordis had dismounted and was still scanning for threat. I found the satchel and was just turning to head back towards the slope when I heard it, and Jordis said "Thalmor."

I did not stop to look but raced up the slope with the satchel in hand and said to Aric "Thalmor." Aric stood up and simply said: "Stay here."

The fear on Krista's face was plain. 

"Don't worry, I said. No one will hurt you." 

Aric must have used a healing spell because the wound in Jyte's side had stopped bleeding and appeared to be healing. Her shoulder and the side of her face were bruised from when she fell but did not seem serious. From behind the trees I could hear their conversation.

"This road is not safe. Bandit attacks are frequent." One of the Thalmor said.

"The lady is indisposed. Our stop will be as short as possible, but the only others we have seen are Thalmor troops, no one else." Aric replied

"State your name and your business traveling this road." The Thalmor said.

"I am a nobleman of Hjaalmarch, and I do not answer to anonymous Justiciars" was Aric's reply.

"I am Justiciar Cyreron, and you do not resemble any nobleman I have met in Tamriel."

"Then you should keep better company, Justiciar Cyreron." he replied.

"Search the wood." the Thalmor said to someone.

"Kirsta lie down next to your sister. Quickly." I said as she hesitated. She lay down next to Jyte. I covered them with my cloak. "Do not come out under any circumstances, not matter what you hear. Do you understand?" She nodded.

"You will not disturb my lady" Aric said.

The wood ran a short distance north, ending at a slight protrusion of rock. It was from that point I would launch my attack.

"We will do as we wish." the Thalmor said.

"As will I." Aric responded, as chaos erupted. 

The calm, damp spring day was suddenly consumed by a fierce, swirling blizzard. The water that had moments ago been soaking the road and hills quickly turned to small shards of ice projectiles. An Atrinoch appeared and lightening stuck just as I launched.

I cast the levitation spell and triggered my rings as I cleared the trees and used all the strength of my legs to launch myself from the rock protrusion at the Thalmor directly in front of me. Practice would have helped, but for first attempts it was more than I had hoped. My bound swords were like wings outstretched as my legs uncoiled and the levitation spell kept me airborne. Six Thalmor down before my momentum carried me to the far side of the road where I landed only to pivot and spring forward again, changing to a whirlwind pattern, mirroring the powerful blizzard that had Aric and Jordis at its center, delivering death side by side. As they moved the blizzard would engulf more Thalmor, who were no match for the pair at the center. Archers were useless until the whirlwind ended. 

_There are too many_ I thought. 

It is an entire company concentrated here in this small stretch of road. In the mine they were dispersed, and we were fighting smaller groups. There were enough here that they could overwhelm us. We needed help, and I knew where to get it. I had ten new recruits at hand but had never raised that many at once. I would have to raise them in batches. 

_Like dough rising on the sideboard in batches_ I thought. 

_Where did that thought come from?_ I wondered as I raised the first group of five. It was the largest number I had ever raised at once, and it took more energy that I had anticipated. I had landed on the side of the road with the stand of trees, so I ducked down behind a tree and took a potion. I could feel it working when a Thalmor appeared. It took him too long to spot me, and so he died. I had one more potion. After that it would be difficult, but not impossible to raise more than one or two at a time. Now it was destruction magic, target and target and target as Aric cut down Thalmor with his sword. A soldier and a Justiciar were suddenly hurled aside and dashed against the rocks. The blizzard had ended, and the archers were about to take a toll. But a group of them were placed side-by-side in the road, facing away from me, and an easy target. As they burned, I took my last potion, raised the next group of Thalmor and sent them to keep the remaining archers busy, just as a lightning bolt struck the rock outcropping I had launched my attack from, spraying me with shards of rock. He had taken me entirely by surprise. It was blind luck I was not killed. I cast a ward with my left hand and paralyzed him with my right, and had just cut his throat with my dagger when the three Thalmor closest to Aric and Jordis, and the small section of road they were standing on suddenly shot high up into the air. I lost sight of them just as the next two suddenly stopped and, as I watched them lift off the ground, seemed to distort and crumple, as if a giant hand had crushed them. As they collapsed, I glanced at Aric, who must have used an Alteration spell because he looked like he was carved from Ebony as he reverted to his sword. A space began to clear around him as Thalmor fell and none were brave enough to take their place. Jordis was next to him. She had used her last arrows and had also reverted to her sword and shield when, with a sweep of Aric's left hand, a wall of liquid fire appeared on the ground in front of him and began to move towards the Thalmor. 

I could not help but marvel at him. He was powerful, wielding magic and weapon like both were nothing. He had donned his masked helm, so I could not see his face, but I knew what those spells were costing him. I knew if I could see his face, I would see the sweat and the strain.

_There are still too many, and we are all tiring_ I thought, just as three Thalmor turned to face me. 

I had not recovered from my last spells. I had no trigger spells left. The vision in my right eye was obscured by blood running down my face from the rock shards. A gash in my leg limited my mobility. My cloak was protecting the sisters. I still held my dagger. I could have parried one, biding time while I regained enough strength to cast another spell, but not three.

 _I die here_ I thought to myself, with a calm I had not expected.

A white-hot ball of fire passed my shoulder from behind, incinerating the Thalmor who were charging at me. It consumed them and continued, striking the next group of Thalmor who were retreating from Aric and the dying firewall and exploded just as two riders charged past me, following the fireball’s path. The first rider, tall and statuesque, wearing gilded armor. The second, not quite as tall, but strong, wearing glass armor. They cleaved a path through the remaining Thalmor, leaving dead in their wake. 

They separated as they passed Aric and Jordis before turning. Lucia's horse reared as it began its charge again, Lucia using spell and staff, Runa spell and sword. All hands occupied; no hands free to hold the reins. I was amazed that my mind had the capacity to marvel at the horsemanship I was seeing. Jordis, joy plain on her shining face, gave a battle cry that could be heard in Dragon's Bridge as she charged the remaining Thalmor.

We gathered afterwards to view the carnage. The crushed, broken bodies. The burned corpses, and those that were frozen like blocks of ice. Those that Aric had flung high into the air and had landed a distance away. Those he had dashed against the rocky outcropping were closer, but just as broken. And in groups clustered where Aric and Jordis had stood the many dead that had fallen to their swords. An entire company. Four Justiciars. Eighty dead Thalmor littered the road. 

We needed to be away from here as soon as possible. Even without Jordis' battle cry the sounds of battle were impossible to miss. Any remaining Thalmor within hearing distance should be converging here.

"One side of you face is red" Runa said.

"What?" I asked

"The left side of your face is red. "She inspected my face closer. "Your hair is singed. So is your eyebrow." she said.

"I will be fine." I said, relieved to be alive.

"She really needs to work on her aim." Runa said.

I laughed just as Aric asked, "Where is your cloak?"

"The girls" I said as I started to run up the embankment.

They had not moved. They were still under my cloak. Nothing seemed to have touched them. "Kirsta" I said to let her know it was me. She pulled to cloak away. "You can come out. it is over." I said.

"Are they gone?" she asked.

"In a manner of speaking" Runa said dryly. Then "You look like my sister Sara." and after a moment looking at Jyte, "And she looks a bit like you." she said to me.

"Krista, these are two of my daughters. They are going to take very good care of you. I have a potion for Jyte to drink if she can, then we should be on our way as quickly as possible." Aric said.

It was no longer safe to keep to the road. We crossed at a shallow point in the river by a fisherman's campsite, following Jordis who was using the hunting trails and leading us up into the mountains, putting as much distance between us and the carnage below as possible without endangering Jyte. Lucia had Jyte in her arms, wrapped in Aric's cloak, Runa had Kirsta in front of her, wrapped in mine. Both girls were still wet, but the cloaks and an Alteration spell were keeping them warm.

Aric had hugged his daughters. A troika of hugs. I was surprised when Lucia hugged me as well. She looked at the burned side of my head, shrugged and we both laughed. Lucia did not wait for the inevitable question. "The Jarl's steward delivered this personally. I thought you would want to see it as soon as possible." She said. With so many Thaneships attached to his name, it was a valid question to which Jarl she was referring. But I knew which one she meant.

_To Aric, Thane of Whiterun. Balgruuf, Jarl of Whiterun is pleased to inform you Bajald Eraldsen is taken by armed men and brought to Whiterun, together with a written charge signed by your hand and a golden token. He will be held under your authority as Thane until such time as you may appear to present charges and evidence in person. The men who delivered him requested the payment of a bounty. However, no written bounty signed by you was presented. You may advise us at your convenience what bounty, if any, you are willing to pay._

_By my hand,_

_Balgruuf._

_Regarding the other matter, stay safe my friend. These are unsettled times._

"Welcome news." Aric said "And welcome couriers. You arrived just in time."

"We would have been here sooner, but someone wanted to be introduced to the new member of our family." Runa said, looking directly at Lucia.

"It appears that the more intelligent of Bajald's men showed initiative." Aric said.

"Where is Serana?" Lucia asked

"We do not know." Jordis said "How is Vilkas?"

"Shut up." Lucia said with a smile.

I recognized the look on Kirsta's face.

"This is normal for them." I said.

* * *

Four battles. Six, if I counted the two bandit attacks before I opened my eyes and saw Sara's face above me in my small shack. Two of them large.

My life before this had not been a violent one. Yes, I had training; and I considered myself trained. But I had never had to use that training on this scale. So, my physical reaction on the ride to Solitude after the gold mine took me by surprise. Now, riding into the hills of The Reach, when the shaking began, I knew what it was. It took a moment for Aric to notice my reaction as we rode slowly, side by side. 

"Have you ever cast a calming spell on yourself?" he asked me. 

"No." I said, feeling embarrassed by my reaction. "Have you?" I asked. 

"Many times." he replied with a smile. "Courage spells as well."

I had seen his tears fall upon the ground at the graves of a young couple, had seen the grief plain upon his face. 

I had more than enough evidence to know that he experienced love.

The sound of his laughter had quickly become one of my most favorite melodies. 

I have no idea why the idea of him experiencing fear was so foreign to me. 

Jordis came riding back down the trail. "There is a hunting shack nearby. One hunter. I can get us there dry, and without any of us having to dismount."

"We need to stop for Jyte's sake but let us ask permission first." Aric said

His request, assisted by a fair amount of gold, was granted. Jyte and Kirsta both sharing the small bed while their clothes dried. Small potions for each of them. Healing ointment on both sides of my face. 

It was our first real opportunity to take stock of our own injuries after the battle. Jordis had a short conversation with the hunter, whose name was Ante. Ante nodded, retrieved a few belongings from the shack, and walked off towards the east. 

"She knows a height that she can use to see almost down to the river east, and almost to Dragon's Bridge north. Nothing will approach unobserved. I told her we were attacked, but not who attacked us. In any case, she is not the least bit interested in knowing. She will keep watch. Once we leave, she will remove any trace of our being here, and then she will count the gold we shall pay her and forget that anyone else was ever here.

"Gold does have its own natural enchantment." Lucia said

"So does a hansom face." said Runa with a smile.

"Do you have one in mind?" Aric asked

"Does it have to be only one?" Runa asked, her smile broadening

"I am in no position to have an opinion in that regard." Aric said with a wince.

"Are you injured?" I asked

"It is not serious." He said as he began to remove his Armor. Gauntlets. Plackart, Tasset, Cuirass, Tunic. 

He began on his own, but in the end, Lucia had to assist him. He had a gash under one arm, where a joint had left him exposed. A lucky strike. A gash on his back where a very forceful blow penetrated his armor. A third on his sword arm, just above his gauntlet. A fourth on his leg, just below the tasset. he applied ointment to the leg wound and bound it. Lucia treated and bandaged the rest. He took a potion afterwards. 

Runa was likewise helping Jordis, who had her own collection of wounds; but my eyes would not move from him. His skin. The markings. A giant dragon took up most of his back. Wolves adorned his shoulders. Symbols I could not name on his chest.

Where before he was chiseled Ebony, now he was chiseled flesh. My face felt on fire. I could not find my breath. 

"Close your eyes" I kept commanding myself, but my eyes would not obey.

His wounds treated, he retrieved his tunic, and the spell that had enraptured me was broken. I found a small group of rocks and sat down; happy to give my unsteady legs a rest. It did not last long.

"Have you other injuries besides you head?" Aric asked me as he approached. He was being kind. He did not need to ask, the blood had seeped through the sleeves of my dress, and through the lower part of my skirt. 

"Nothing serious." I said, mimicking him. "I can treat them myself." Healing ointment. A healing potion. Nothing that required the expenditure of energy. Energy I did not have. I felt weak. And not only because of the battle.

* * *

“It was a battle to remember, no denying that.” Railius said. “A proper battle. In the mine is was skirmishes. Not detracting from it, mind you. It was expertly done. Classic tactics how a small force can defeat a larger force. But this here battle, this was something else.”

“I thought I was going to die.” I said. “And I was not afraid. Not until afterwards when I was shaking so much that I thought I would fall out of my saddle.”

“That’s just your body reacting. That’s not fear. You never showed fear. Not in the mine, not on the road.” He said.

“Would not a sane person feel fear in my place?” I asked him

“Fear is what you feel before a battle when you have time to think about it.” He said. “I’ve seen it more than I can count. Once the battle starts and you get to it, and concentrating on the man in front of you, your mind doesn’t have the capacity for anything else. You didn’t have time enough to think about it beforehand, not on the road, not in the mine.”

“I am still trying to reconcile my mind with what I saw him do.” I said.

“He is a force to reckon with, and his girls was something to behold.” He said.

“I searched for a word to describe it and I always return to ‘artistry’.” I said

“You displayed artistry of your own.” He said, “I have never seen the like.”

“Is it proper for me to feel pride in my ability when the result was so much loss of life?” I asked.

“I can’t answer that for you lass. I took more lives than I can count when I was a solider. It was either kill them or be killed yourself.” He said. “It isn’t like you walked into a village and murdered innocents. These were soldiers that attacked you. Attacked them young girls. I know what I would have done, and how I would have felt about it afterwards. You have to search your heart for your own answer.”

“What would life be like for us if I had taken your advice and we had ridden off to a new life?” I asked him

“Them bandits was already on our trail.” He answered. “And you would never have met that Thane.”

“That would have been a good thing.” I said

“You just keep repeating that to yourself until you believe it.” He answered.

“I am sure I do not take your meaning.” I answered him.

“I am sure you do lass.” He said with a smile.

“Being dead does not mean you know everything. You said that yourself.” I argued.

“Please expand upon what my being dead means, you having so much more experience with being dead than I have.” He said.

“Well, for one it has certainly not made you less argumentative.” I said.

I will never tire of his laughter.

* * *

Jyte was much better. Healing well, clothed, dry, fed. It was not that long ago that I had been in her position, her condition. And that is not where the resemblance ended.

"They thought Jyte and Krista were me and Sara. That is why the Thalmor accused them of being bandits. Someone had seen us. Described us."

"Yes." Aric said as the packing of our belongings continued.

"What will they think now, after inspecting the road?" I asked

"I am not sure. We left very little evidence, and that which we did leave will confuse them." he said

"In what way?" I asked

"Jordis was using Elven arrows." he said. "And some of the magical effects they will find are not common but bear some resemblance to Foresworn and Hagraven magic."

"Some resemblance?" Runa asked

“If they have a highly sensitive Justiciar they may notice the difference, but I do not think so.”

"No dead, except their own. No weapons left behind, except their own. Effects from magic that they may misinterpret." Lucia said. "They will be confused indeed."

Once again, he had employed magic I had never seen, never dreamed. 

"While we are on the topic of magic" Jordis said "The image of you sailing through the air like a bird of prey, glowing wings spread, gracefully cutting down Thalmor is still clear in my mind. It was something to see. Truly a thing of beauty."

Lucia and Runa were looking at me in a way I did not like.

"I agree. Beautiful is just the word I was thinking." Aric said as he looked at me, and my heart rate doubled.

 _If my face continues to feel like this it is going to explode._ I thought.

"What kind of Priestess flies through the air with glowing wings cutting down Thalmor?" Runa asked

"The desperate kind that is fighting for her life, and the lives of her companions." I said, "In addition, I swore to Krista that no one would hurt them." I said

"You were true to your vow." Lucia said, "It seems your gifts are not limited to Restoration." she said and, for reasons of her own, hugged me again.

"Since we are on the topic of beauty" I said "I have never seen horsemanship like that. I am still surprised that some Thalmor did not kill me as I was standing there, admiring the two of you as you turned and rode back through the Thalmor, not a rein held between the two of you."

"We had an excellent teacher." Lucia said

"Vilkas loves watching her ride." Runa said.

"Would you stop?" Lucia yelled at her sister.

Jordis, Jyte and Krista watched the exchange from a short distance away. Jordis said something that made the two sisters laugh.

It was past midday when we took our leave. Jordis had found a route that took us to the main road, and we decided to continue to Markath without stopping.

"I cannot leave the two of you on your own, and the roads north and east will not be safe. It is best if we take you with us to Markath. I will send a courier to notify your family, and you will be my guest in Markath. Have you ever visited Markath?" he asked them both.

"No, we have never been that far west. This hunting trip was the farthest we have ever been from home." Jyte said

"Rorikstead is quite a distance from where we found you." Lucia said to Jyte, who was still sitting in front of her.

"We have had to hunt farther from home every season." Jyte said "But we had not intended to travel so far."

"Rorikstead is on our route back. You will be home soon." Aric said.

Kirsta asked me "Have you been to Markath before?"

"Yes, but a long time ago." I answered.

Our progress was slow. A group of Foresworn looters made the fatal error of attacking us on the main road. Aric and Jordis drew their swords and charged at the first two. Runa and Lucia were riding double and could not take part in the charge. Lucia used her staff to incinerate the third looter as Aric and Jordis were on the return leg of their charge and killed the fourth. 

It took less than a minute. It was evening when we entered Markath City. Aric said something to one of the guards who nodded and passed an order to another.

Jyte and Kirsta were mesmerized by what they saw, and with good reason. Markath was like no other city. Stone towers, waterfalls, golden domes.

And stairs. An abundance of them. Most of them seeming to be between us and Aric's Markath home. Jyte was holding her side when we arrived at the door and entered.

Something was wrong. This was the second housecarl that seemed immune to Aric’s charm. And she was a Nord, not a Wood Elf. Another theory in tatters. She was followed by a woman even taller than Lucia, but just as beautiful. Except:

"Are those feathers?" Kirsta whispered to Runa.

"Yes, but there are fewer than the last time I saw her." Runa whispered back.

This must be Morryn, the Recovering Hagraven.

"Morryn, Rigel, this is Noxaura, Jyte and Kirsta. They are my guests. Rigel, this is Jordis, my housecarl from Solitude. Would you acquaint everyone with the household? I have a quick note to write." Aric said.

"Please follow me." Rigel said. Morryn just stood there as we passed, the girls glancing at her as they passed. From the way she was dressed she was in no way attempting to hide anything. She greeted Lucia and Runa. It seemed that hugging was the common form of greeting in this family. She obviously knew Jordis, so she had been to Solitude. She nodded at me and I nodded back. 

It was an impressive home, but I was most taken by the girl’s reaction. It was like they had been transported to a land of wonders. They obviously had no idea what a Thane's life resembled. Aric reappeared with his note. "Jyte, can you write instructions on how the courier can identify your home?" Aric asked. 

"What courier?" Morryn asked, her voice dark and beautiful.

"The one that will be here in a moment to collect this note." Aric answered.

It did not take long. 

Aric handed him the note and Jyte's description of their home. "The Foresworn are active. Six men should be sufficient." He turned and spoke to Jyte "If he leaves immediately it will be late when he arrives, and he may wake your household. Will your family worry if he starts at first light?" 

"They will not grow concerned for a few days yet." Jyte said.

"You lost everything you had when you were attacked, except what you were wearing. How much will that loss burden your family?" He asked.

"I do not know. We have never returned empty handed before. It will make things more difficult." She said

"We can ease that burden." Aric said. He handed the courier two purses. "This is for you. This is for you to deliver with the note, explaining it is recompense for what the bandits stole. The note will tell the rest.”

"By your order Thane, it will be done."

"At first light" Aric said.

"Yes." the courier said and left.

"Your parents will be informed that you met misfortune and required assistance, and that you will be my guests in Markath until I return you to them personally in three or four days’ time. I mentioned misfortune, but no details. The courier will mention bandits, but no details. It is best to omit any mention of the Thalmor. Bandits threatened you, you ran, abandoning everything. You were injured. We found you and brought you to Markath. You understand I am sure." Aric said.

"We will convince them. Do not worry." Jyte said.

"For now, I believe we all deserve a hot bath, a good meal, and rest. For tomorrow, a tour of the city for you if you wish. I must visit the Jarl and call upon the Temple of Dibella; but I will catch up with you when I am finished. Jyte, the city has an overabundance of stairs. Be patient while your body heals."

I explored the house while the young sisters expressed their disbelief at the magnificence of what they saw, in a manner that reminded me of Sara and Delphine. Someone else would have to oversee hair brushing. The voices turned into laughs and giggles as they took possession of the bath. It was my turn next. My face had healed quickly, but the ointment took some effort to remove from my hair. Runa and Lucia were in less of a hurry, talking privately to Morryn near the alchemist station, which reminded me as a sat and soaked that I should re-enchant rings, and renew my potions. And repair my traveling dress. And think about my future. And get my emotions under control. And stop thinking about him. 

Why is this bath so hot?


	13. High Priestess of Skyrim

**20th of First Seed**

I had forgotten how beautiful Markath was. I had also forgotten how many stairs it possessed. And an early morning visit from a merchant, to deliver several packages and collect my damaged dress, demonstrated that Aric had written more than one note yesterday.

"The girls clothes need washing, and they needed something to wear." Aric said. "Your dress will be returned later today once it has been repaired and cleaned. Someone will collect the girl’s clothes and return them later as well."

His ability at estimating sizes was excellent. It would have to be, having ten children. Eleven children. The dresses were by no means elegant, but neither were they plain. They were also not the breeches, tunics, vests, and odd bits of leather that the girls had been wearing when we met them. There dresses had arrived packaged with bits of sage and other aromatic fragrances, and two girls who had up until now not shown any interest in their appearance were adamant that they be scrubbed and brushed before putting on their new finery.

Aric smiled as he watched them. 'The Girls' were how he referred to them. It was how we all were referring to them, but for him it seemed to trigger that paternal instinct in him that I had seen enough now to recognize, particularly when it came to his daughters. 

Fathers and daughters and their special relationship. Except me and my father. 

It would have been difficult to have had any relationship with my father, since we were almost never together. I have brief images of memory of the two of us, me laughing as he would swing me in his arms, or him carrying me to bed in our small cottage. I cannot remember the exact day he failed to return home. I have a much clearer memory of my mother saying to me "There is a greatness in you, but you will not find it here. The Reverend Mother can guide you to it, but only if you are brave, and do not cry." 

What would my life have been if it had looked like this? 

Why do I love him? Because he is my dead Queen incarnate? Because he is the Father I have lost? Because he is good, and compassionate, and gentle, and kind, and everything I have ever dreamed a man would be?

His body is older than mine, by at least a decade, possible two.

His soul is so much older than that. Does he even know who he was, what he was? What memories does he have of his previous life, previous lives? Did one of those lives see the construction of Markath?

The Thalmor are on a mission in Skyrim, in Tamriel. That is the Mystery he is chasing.

The Mystery I am chasing is him.

* * *

Someone did collect, not just the girl’s clothes, but all the household laundry. I had not noticed in Solitude or Whiterun. But, then again, I had not noticed anyone washing laundry either. Of course, they did not wash their own laundry, not a Thane's household, not in the city at least. There was laundry in abundance drying in the sun when we arrived at his home in Pale.

No one seemed to be in a hurry to be elsewhere. Jordis and Rigel were repairing armor, sharpening weapons, and talking quietly when they could. Trading housecarl stories? Almost certainly, since it was Jordis who shared Aric's bed last night. Some would have to; all other beds being occupied. I wondered how much Rigel knew about their relationship. She gave no indication what she was thinking or feeling, but there was no stiffness, no formality in her demeanor towards Jordis. Shield sisters also have their own special relationship. It was then that I realized how much I missed Sara, my surrogate-little-sister. Just thinking about her, and imagining our reunion made me feel better, and smile, which Aric noticed. He gave me quizzical look and a smile of his own, just as Jyte and Kirsta presented themselves with: "How do we look?" 

"You are both very pretty when you have not recently fallen off a cliff." I said

"You are both beautiful and will have to take a guard to fend off all the attention you will receive touring the City." Aric

They both giggled and Kirsta blushed as Jyte said "No one has ever called me beautiful."

"Then your entire village is blind." Morryn said. "I know beauty when I see it. You are both beautiful girls. You will both be beautiful women. Have a care, or it will cause you trouble." She had dressed in a more modest gown that hid the remaining feathers and accentuated her figure. Her quite excellent figure.

It was a bit too serious a tone, even in a voice that could charm a Daedra.

"Then it is good that you will accompany them on their tour of the City. You can protect them against misfortune." Aric said, the humor plain in his voice.

"I am happy to be of service." Morryn responded merrily.

* * *

A small parade of women touring Markath. Exclamations of wonder. Fingers pointed, necks strained, faces looking upward. Markath is not a city for those with a phobia of heights, or who have difficulty with stairs. If you suffer from neither there is a great deal to be seen. 

And if you can charm the court wizard Calcelmo the Dwemer Museum located in Understone Keep is impressive. Aric had clearly done so because the wizard’s attitude immediately changed when he saw Morryn and Rigel. She introduced the Thane's young guests, who were quickly offered a guided tour by the court wizard himself. The girls marveled at what they were shown. 

"The Thane himself brought me some of these items." Calcelmo said to all of us. "As did these young women" he said looking at Lucia and Runa. Jyte and Kirsta were clearly impressed, but they looked at Lucia and Runa as if they were deities when Runa walked up to the towering Dwemer Centurion and brought Kirsta to the left side and pointed to a long slash in the metal on its leg. 

"I did this." was all Runa said. 

"Yes. Quite a few of the artifacts the Thane and his daughters bring me must be reassembled from parts of different objects. This Centurion on display uses parts from two separate centurions." Calcelmo said.

This was clearly news to Rigel. "You brought down two of these? You and the Thane?"

"More than that." Lucia said

"How many more?"

Lucia and Runa looked at each other, each hoping the other would have a number in mind. "I do not really know." Lucia

"Enough that you lost count?" Jordis asked unbelieving.

"Apparently." Runa said.

"Gods' blood!" Jordis exclaimed. Rigel seemed to share her opinion.

"Perhaps we should continue the tour?" Calcelmo suggested

"Show me what else in here you killed." Kirsta whispered to Runa in a conspiratory tone that Runa returned with pleasure "I will."

The tour concluded, Calcelmo bid us farewell, giving us a parting gift of a book of poetry that he had written himself.

Our timing was perfect as we met Aric returning from his visit with the Jarl, and we all went off to the Temple of Dibella together. 

"Have you visited the temple before?" Aric asked me.

"No. I was already in orders when I visited last and it was not our custom to visit other temples" I said

"You visited the shrine of Azura with me and participated in their ritual." he reminded me.

"My customs have recently changed." was all I said.

"Mother Hamal is the High Priestess of Dibella. She has a unique demeanor, but is devoted to her order, and has a kind heart. And she is my very dear friend."

"How do you know her?" I asked him

"She and I have been friends since we were both Runa's age. Lucia and Runa met her when we rescued the new Sybil of Dibella. A young girl from Karthwasten named Fjorta. We will visit Fjorta's family on our journey to Rorikstead."

"Rescued?"

"From the Foresworn. Do you recall the fort we passed traveling from the hunter’s shack where we joined the main road at the bridge? That was where she was being kept."

"What did they want with her?" I asked, remembering the fort.

"Nothing good." was his answer.

More stairs. Up, and up, and up, finally to a door leading into the temple.

From his description of Mother Hamal, I expected an elderly Priestess with failing wits and erratic behavior. 

I did not expect this stunning middle-aged woman who was possible the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. 

And her unique demeanor involved walking up to Aric, placing her hand on the side of his face and kissing him on the lips for what seemed like forever. 

_Nothing unique there_ I thought. She noticed the two girls. 

"Two new initiates, Aric?" she asked him before noticing me "Or is it three?" she asked. "You are all quite lovely to look at. Step forward child." she said to Jyte. Jyte was about to object, but Hamal took her hands and brought her forward. It was clear that Hamal was not wearing anything under the thin shift that seemed to serve all the Priestess as a robe. She looked at Jyte, caressing her face and neck and head. I was becoming very uncomfortable with her behavior. Jyte was not a little girl, she was a woman, but still young; younger than I was.

I was about to object until: "You have been recently injured." Hamal said to her. "And are not yet completely recovered. And you have had a recent trauma. You are having nightmares."

"Yes, your grace" Jyte said softly.

Hamal turned to look at Kirsta. "You also child".

"Yes, your grace" Kirsta answered.

"The blessing of Dibella can help you both". she said, as she turned to look directly at me "She can help all of you, whatever injury of trauma you carry; whatever your loss, whatever you grieve."

I realized as she spoke to me that I had stopped breathing.

"But that is not the purpose of your visit" She said speaking to Aric.

"No. I wished to visit with you, dear friend. And to see the Sybil and seek her guidance".

Hamal laughed. "A visit from you is always welcome. And the wisdom of the Sybil is well sought. But best to wait until it has had a chance to ripen."

She sent for Fjorta and, as we waited said to all of us "You are all welcome. Come. Drink the waters of Dibella. Receive Dibella's blessing. Receive Dibella's healing love."

Jyte and Kirsta stepped to the pool and drank the water. I had not intended to partake, but one after another everyone stepped to the pool and drank. At last it was only me. 

_What could it hurt?_ I thought, as I stepped up to the pool and drank the water.

What I did next I did without any hesitation, any doubt. I knelt by the water and began to recite the Prayer of Thanksgiving.

" _I give thanks to the Divines for the blessings they have bestowed upon my life_ " I started, when the Priestesses in the temple stopped what they were doing and knelt, facing me and the pool. I continued, reaching the end with the concluding words " _never let me forget to show my gratitude in prayer and acts of kindness._ "

I was about to rise when the nearest Priestess knelt beside me and dipped her hand in the water. She kissed my cheek and anointed my forehead with water and said, 'blessings of Dibella be upon you'. 

Then another Priestess. 

And another. 

Four Priestesses. Then Mother Hamal, who kissed my mouth and drew a pattern on my forehead with the water. Finally, a little girl who must certainly be Fjorta.

Or not quite finally. 

He knelt beside me and dipped hand in the water and then turned towards me and, as I turned to look at him, he anointed my forehead. 

"Blessings of Dibella be upon you." Aric said before he kissed my cheek. 

For a moment there was no air in the room. His face was an inch away from mine. But the moment ended as he sat back on his heels and stood, helping me up. 

We stood there for a moment before Mother Hamal said to me "A blessing from the Champion of Dibella."

I did not understand. "Champion of Dibella?" I asked, looking from one to the other.

"Aric is a Champion of Dibella. It is a rare gift that Dibella grants. Rarer still that it is bestowed within a man."

"Within?" I asked, already knowing her answer. He had told me himself.

"Aric carries a portion of Dibella within him. He is Dibella's Champion. A Champion of Love. Bringing Dibella, bringing Love, wherever he goes." she said, as her eyes bore into mine.

She may as well have read my mind. She knew exactly what I was thinking. I love him. It was only recently that I could use those words to describe what I was feeling for him. 

But all those women. All those Looks. And my love. For Dibella's Champion.

A Champion of Love, who brings love wherever he goes. 

Brings it how? In a spell? In a potion? Through force of will?

What power does that portion of Dibella within him give him over others? 

Is what I feel for him real? Is what any of us feel for him real? 

Sara said it herself. "We all started in grief and pain and ended loving him." Dibella. Potema. Meridia and Azura for all I know. So many Looks from so many women. 

Did any of them have a choice? 

Do I? 

Whose puppet am I?

* * *

"She has the gift of sight." Aric said as we continued our tour of the city.

"Amongst others. She has been a good friend for many years." 

He continued talking, but the conversation was one sided. I could hear his voice, but it was like hearing it through glass. My thoughts, Mother Hamal's words, replaying continuously in my head. 

I do not know what to believe. 

I do not know what to think. 

Dibella's Champion, bringing love wherever he goes. 

Almost three hundred Thalmor would disagree.

No love evident in the gold mine, or on the Dragon's Bridge south road.

"What she said troubles you." It was not a question. It was a statement. 

We had traveled some short distance but were lagging behind the others. 

"Yes. What she said troubles me. It upsets me. It disturbs me. She has the gift of sight. You may not have the Sight, but neither are you blind. How should I react, finding out that my feelings for you may be lies? That they may not be mine? That they may not be real? That I have been manipulated?" 

My voice had risen constantly. Everyone else had stopped. Faces were turning towards us.

"Do you truly believe that what you feel is not real? That you have been manipulated?" He asked me

"I do not know what to believe." I answered.

"This is not the first time we have had this conversation." he reminded me.

"I was already questioning what I was feeling and why. I thought it was the potions you gave me, but it was not the potions. It was you." I said

"You believe that I am manipulating you?" He asked again

"I do not know." I answered again.

"If I am doing so, I seem to be failing." he said. 

I did not know what to say in response, so I said nothing.

"If I truly had the gift to charm others that you think I have there would be fewer dead men and elves. Many, many fewer. I wish I had the gift you believe I have. Skyrim would benefit. An end to the civil war. An end to enmity. But you have seen with your own eyes that my gifts take me down a different path, and that path is marked by a trail of bodies."

The glass was gone, his voice was clear. It was the most somber I had ever seen him.

"I have not manipulated you, not by will, or intent or knowledge. We share a bond. I do not know what it means. I believe we were guided together, for some purpose I do not know, but all I have done is lead you down a path of death, and that cannot possibly be the intended purpose. I have strayed dangerously from whatever course we were intended to travel together. You are in danger because of actions I undertook. These young women and my children are placed in danger for actions I undertook. Mother Hamal is very wise and sees far. What she said was no accident. She had a purpose. There seem to be many purposes at work. It is like a Shaping. It requires time to work, to complete." 

He stopped for a moment. 

"You do not trust me. You have no reason to trust me. You barely know me. I have made bad choices, irresponsible choices, dangerous choices." he said "You are right not to trust me. You are right to question my actions and my motives. I question them daily."

We continued to walk, all of us silent; no one speaking a word. 

* * *

It appeared that everyone had divided into pairs. Jyte and Krista. Jordis and Rigel. Lucia and Aric. Runa and Morryn. Four conversations in quiet tones.

Dinner, more specifically Jyte and Kirsta's reaction to diner, raised the mood; but the mood did not truly improve until Runa asked "Has anyone else read the book that Calcelmo gave us? The one he wrote?" 

"I read some of the poems, before the book was finished." Aric said

"Why?" Jyte asked

"It is a book of love poems." Runa said. "Would you believe that he could write something like this?"

"Love comes in many different packages." said the Champion of Dibella. "Do not judge the package by the wrapping."

Lucia picked up the book and read for a few minutes. "He writes well." Lucia said

"You should give the book to Vilkas." Runa said.

"I will murder you in your sleep!" Lucia said to her.

It began at that point to resemble the family dinners I had come to expect from this family.

* * *

It was mid morning before we assembled at the stables, to load everything that had been purchased yesterday into our cart, also purchased yesterday, say our farewells to Morryn (Rigel was accompanying us, wearing her next to best armor, and would return with the cart once it had delivered its cargo) and begin our journey to Rorikstead, with a short stop in Karthwasten to visit Fjorta's parents and bring them the gifts that Mother Hamal had entrusted to us.

Not alone to the parents of the new Sybil did Mother Hamal bring gifts. 

My gift she delivered in person, her thin shift replaced with something more modest, and covered with a hooded robe against yesterday evening's damp chill, both of which were in abundance as we walked the deserted streets of Markath. 

We stopped finally at the blacksmith's forge, quiet now this late in the evening, except for the sound of the rushing water as it cascaded over the waterfall directly below. 

"This is one of my favorite places in Markath to visit in the evening." she shared. "But only when it is quiet." she said with a smile. It was easy to see why. The warmth of the forge was welcome, and the waterfalls provided a wonderful view. 

"Many who visit our temple are troubled." she said. "Most are less so when they depart, their burdens or infirmities being simple to easy. Some, however, we cannot help; not directly. We can only give them the tools to help themselves. Which tool is needed depends upon the individual.”

I was about to ask her to move more quickly to her point, but when she did it was not what I was expecting.

"Aric was one such. We were both young, and I admit that I had designs on him. How could I not? He was an unfinished sculpture then, half the age he is now. And troubled. I was likewise young and conceited enough to think that I was what he needed. I was beautiful then, a young Priestess of Dibella but already skilled in the physical arts. I was not in love with him yet. He had only recently become aware of his heritage. It would be years before he would embrace his destiny; before his fight with Alduin would begin in earnest; before he would find the path that would define the rest of his life. He had the gift of youth, but not maturity. He had the gift of strength, but not wisdom. 

We learned much from each other in those years. We dreamed of running away. A small home somewhere, small lives filled with no responsibilities besides each other. A beautiful dream. Life intervened. I was not what he needed. I played my part, and I am still conceited enough to believe that my part was important. But there are some gifts that only time can grant. If I were to take you back to that time, you would recognize the seed of the man you know today, but you would not like him nearly as much. Young, strong, brash. Overconfident in his abilities. We both were.

The man you know today has learned patience, humility, honesty, but most importantly he has learned self-reflection. That was the missing tool that he needed. It took a very long time to forge. And it was during that forging that I finally fell in love with him."

I could never have pictured him as she described him, not if I tried until the sun burned out.

He and I had spent yesterday apart, though we were in the same house. He rarely ventured out of his bedroom, spending most of the day sitting at his desk, writing letters; a series of couriers coming in and going out. Or he would just sit, his chin in his hand, looking into the void, his mind far away, or laying on his bed looking up into Oblivion, seeing nothing of his surroundings.

 _He is hurt._ I thought at times, seeing him like that, _And I am the one who has hurt him._ Other times I remembered him kneeling at the grave of the young couple, his tears falling upon the earth. _Not hurt. Grieving._ Hurt. Grief. Pain. I spent the next few minutes counting how many different words there were.

I had likewise not ventured much out of my borrowed bed, only to make potions and recharge my rings. I was still so confused in my mind that if the sun had not risen yesterday, I would not have known which direction was up.

"What you said to me yesterday upset me greatly. It made me doubt everything I had felt recently. I accused him publicly of manipulating me, of charming me somehow so that I would fall in love with him."

"Charm you he did, I have no doubt. But he needed no gift from Dibella or anyone else to accomplish that. I am a Priestess of Dibella. I was a Priestess when he and I first met. There is no love charm or spell, or potion know to men or Gods that would affect me. The charm he used on you is the same charm he used on me. Himself."

"Then I do not understand why you said those words to me. Those words that made me doubt him." I said

"It is not him you doubt." she said. "It is yourself you doubt. Your feelings, not his. Your motivation, not his. You do not doubt him. You love him. You are beginning to worship him. That is a very dangerous path and it will end badly. Yesterday in the temple you stood where Aric stood twenty-two years ago. Your deity yesterday was Aric. His deity twenty-two years ago was himself."

I was beginning to worship him. It was true. I knew it in my heart, though I would never admit it to her. Her portrait of Aric as a young man was not at all flattering. I would not have liked him at all. I could not see any portion of that boy in the man I know. He had worked his own Shaping on himself over many years.

"We share a bond neither of us asked for. We were brought together, I will not say against our will, but certainly without our consent. Something involving us continues to work towards its conclusion and neither of us knows what that conclusion is. Something is manipulating us."

"You state the situation quite plainly. I will not pretend that I do not know of what you speak. My sight reaches many places. But you have not yet asked the question that you have been wanting to ask since you drank the waters. May I, then, ask a question of you?" she asked

I nodded. "What prompted you to say your prayer giving thanks in the temple? It was a beautiful gesture, and we valued it greatly; but we have many Priestesses from other orders visit and take the waters and not do what you did."

"I do not know. I had not planned it. Frankly, I had been hiding the fact that I was a Priestess. Aric knew, as did his daughters and Jordis, but no one else. In that moment, I was a priestess. A Priestess. I was the most natural thing I have done in a long time, reciting that prayer."

"Do you think Potema spoke to you in that moment?" she asked me

It shocked me to hear her say the name. "Aric told you?" I asked

"No. As I said, my sight sees many things, near and far, in hearts and in caves, in palaces and stables."

"No, I do not think it was Potema. She has never spoken to me in that manner. When I was younger, I took it as a rebuke for my lack of faith. Now I do not know."

"But you assume that it is Potema that brought you and Aric together." She said

"He still shares a bond with her. Her rebirth is ended, her remains sanctified and laid to rest, her soul committed to Oblivion. Yet the connection remains. He is my last link to the Wolf Queen I have pledged and dedicated my life to serve. It was he that found me dying in a shack in the middle of nowhere against all odds."

"I believe you are correct that something brought you together. What that something was remains to be seen. May I ask you another question?" Another nod. "Would you describe Aric as kind? Compassionate? Loving?" 

"all of those and more" I said, as my tears started to fall, and my breath faltered

"Potema did not have such a reputation" she replied

"She was a powerful, determined woman in a world of men." I said. "History does not treat such women kindly." I said as I wiped my face.

"You believed her reputation is undeserved?" she asked me.

"It is one of the tenants of our faith." I answered.

"As is charity." she continued

"Yes" I replied

"And kindness?" she persisted

"Yes." I said, not knowing where this conversation was heading.

"And what did your order expect would be the outcome of Potema's return?" she asked

"The Golden Age of Skyrim. The betterment of life for everyone, regardless of race. An end to this war that has affected so many. An end to poverty, hunger, sickness."

"That is a truly admirable goal." she said. "Whether that would have been the outcome will remain a mystery, but in your mind these tenants and this outcome are what you imagine when you think of Potema. This is what you have pledged and dedicated your life to serving."

"I suppose so." I said.

"And now that she is no more, you have transferred your pledge to Aric." she said.

"I have done nothing of the kind." I said angrily. "He has made it abundantly clear that he is not Potema and she is not him. I have pledged nothing to him."

"Except your love." she said

My face became immediately hot. "I have not pledged him my love." I said with clenched teeth.

"You love him. You tell yourself so. Is that not the same thing?" she asked

"I will not presume to define love to the high Priestess of Dibella." I said sarcastically.

"That is wise." she said as she smiled. "Do not worship Aric. Love him certainly, but do not worship him. I love him very much, and I say plainly that neither of you will be happy if you transfer your worship to him. He will tell you himself that he does not deserve it. Neither do you. I apologize for making you angry. Forging a tool is difficult and requires effort. The hour grows late, and you depart in the morning. We should walk back." she said

Forging a tool. What tool was she forging for me? Forging with me? Am I the tool, or the hand that will wield it?

"May I ask a final question?" She asked.

Gods. "Please do." I said

"Can you not still serve that to which you have pledged your life? To kindness, and mercy, and love, and compassion, and charity, and prayer, without attaching a face, or body, or name to it? Does your priesthood rely on the existence of someone else? Your goal is admirable. Can you continue to work towards your goal, absent a deity, either extant or expected?"

"I had not thought of it like that." I said

"Try. See where it leads you. Be a Priestess. Be a High Priestess since you are now the most senior member of your order. The only member of your order. Build a new order. One that continues to serve your higher purpose."

"High Priestess of what order?" I asked.

"High Priestess of Skyrim has a pleasing sound to it." she answered with a smile.


	14. As the Reverend Mother wishes

**23rd of First Seed**

The cart could have been the twin of the cart that Railius and I began our journey with. The cart that now sat, broken and forlorn, not too far from my shack and Railius' grave. 

This cart held two young women and a considerable amount of supplies and baggage. The dog that followed alongside seemed to be an acquaintance of the cart horse and would not leave it. Jyte and Kirsta fell in love with it immediately. 

Jyte's love was divided between the dog and her new bow. It had not left her side since she received it yesterday. Her screams and squeals of delight when Rigel presented it to her could have drawn blood at closer range. It fit her well, and her accuracy with it drew second glances from Rigel and Jordis and Runa.

The trove of treasure in the cart included hairbrushes (of course), a new shovel (for their father), a new broom (for their mother) cloths, pelts, barley, flour, wine (two excellent varieties) oil, rugs and a considerable amount of game and, importantly, medicines and potions. 

"There is no point in taking a half-empty cart. " Aric simply said when Jordis asked if he was possibly being overgenerous.

"Father was adamant that you do not return empty handed." Lucia said to the girls, who had mentioned that the winter had been hard on Rorikstead, and many of their neighbors were still sick. Some of the contents of the small healer’s chest I had made myself only yesterday, but most came from Aric’s home, or the Apothecary in Markath.

The girls insisted on wearing their finery. Aric agreed, saying "An encounter with Thalmor troops is possible. Best if we all look as little like bandits as possible. We will simply be a wealthy family on a journey. A well-protected family." he said, with a nod to Jordis and Rigel, both in shining plate. Jordis and Rigel in front. Lucia and Runa at the rear. Aric and I riding together, Krista driving the cart traveling behind. The dog occasionally leaving the carthorse to investigate something off the road, but always returning.

We had barely spoken since returning to the house after visiting the temple. When we did speak, it was nothing of substance. The beginning of our journey was the same. Banal topics. The road, the weather, the rate of progress. We were distributed so that we could support each other if it came to defense, but not so close that we all became one target. 

We were approaching the section of road where we were attacked by the Foresworn. Jordis had a short conversation with Rigel before she donned her helm and rode out ahead. Rigel donned her own helm and drew her bow, adjusting her quiver so that she could draw more easily from the saddle. Jyte and stopped caressing her new bow and had an arrow at the ready. Runa and Lucia paid more attention to our surroundings but showed no change in posture. 

Aric's demeanor did not change at all. He still seemed to be lost in his thoughts. The bodies were gone, of course. Looters would have taken whatever equipment was of use. The predators would have taken care of the rest. But nothing disturbed us, and we arrived in Karthwasten, deliver our gifts and a note from their daughter, enjoyed an evening's rest and hospitality before returning to the road, and our journey.

* * *

I began to think that we had used up all our words. That my outburst that night in Markath had erased any words that had not yet been spoken between us. That this silence between us was all that remained. We were still both lost in thought; Aric thinking Gods know what while parts of conversations resurfaced in my mind. "Love him but do not worship him" "You are right not to trust me" "It is not him you doubt. You doubt yourself." "Be a High Priestess." What would Reverend Mother Pevel have done? What would Mother Hamal do? 

"There is a greatness in you, but you will not find it here. The Reverend Mother can guide you to it, but only if you are brave, and do not cry." 

"What did you say?" he asked me

"It was one of the last things my mother said to me, as she packed my meager belongings, before Reverend Mother Pevel lifted me into her cart for the journey north. Until yesterday I never doubted that it was Pevel she meant. Now I am not sure." I answered.

"Your mother had the Sight?" He asked me.

"Not that I am aware. She was gifted in Oneiromancy. It was how we survived once my father was gone. One day a Priestess road up to our small cottage, one of only three in a small unnamed village in the Nibenay Valley and asked to have her dreams interpreted. The Priestess was Pevel, and her dreams were of me. That is how I became a Novitiate of The Order of Communities as it was called then."

"You were a Priestess of Cybele." he said

"Yes. Pevel died several years after I joined the order and Catilia became high Priestess. It was then that a change began. Talk of discovered manuscripts and tomes that some interpreted to mean that Potema was an incarnation of Cybele. I was still a child then, too young to form my own opinion. Reverend Mother Catilia was convinced that this interpretation was accurate and broke with the Order of Communities. Many of my order did not follow her."

"But you did."

"I was too young to be given a choice, as were several others."

"Your pledge to Cybele became a pledge to Potema." He said.

"Yes."

"And you now think it may not have been Pevel your mother meant."

"I think it is possible that she meant someone else." I said

"Who then?"

"Mother Hamal."

He was quiet for a short time before saying "She has the true gift of Sight, and she is very wise. She saved me, at a time in my life I very much needed saving. Saved me from myself. I owe her a debt I can never repay."

"She said the two of you dreamed of running away together to a small life in a small cottage."

He laughed. A full laugh, with a broad smile, as he recalled that dream. His laugh was like a potion for my heart.

"What castles we constructed out of thin air. The dreams we had. You would laugh if I described them. We would lay awake at night and build a future purely from starlight." he said.

His words were poetry. His voice music.

"I may not laugh. I have dreams of my own, built on less substance that air and starlight. And I am not much older now than you were then. It may be that our dreams are not so different."

"Dreams are important. As is Purpose. And Hope. And Love. Someone to love. Something to hope for, to dream of. A guiding purpose in life. Essential ingredients for happiness."

"It sounds like a powerful potion." I said.

"I wish I could brew it in gallons and bottle it. I would give it away freely." he said, the pain back in his voice again.

"I am sorry for what I said. Deeply. I have not been myself lately."

"You were justified in saying what you did. I have not earned your trust, not by word or action. And if you have felt out of sorts it is entirely understandable. Your life has turned upside down. You needed time to find your feet, and I have prevented you from doing so. I have failed in my responsibilities. I let my anger cloud my judgement. Otherwise I would never have jeopardized my children on this path. Or you. It is a constant regret to me. A reminder of the folly of my youth, my tendency to charge into things headlong. I was alone then. I had no responsibilities besides myself. Not now. I have put other lives in jeopardy. I cannot begin to describe how mortified I feel."

"I was not justified in blaming you for something that was not your fault. It was not you I doubted. I doubted myself. Hamal helped me see that. She helped me see other things as well. In that she did me a great service. If I had held my tongue for a little while she would have eased my burden, and I would not have hurt you." I said

"It was not your words that hurt me. I was hurt already. Your words gave me the courage to say what I was thinking and feeling, but I have been carrying that hurt since well before we met. Lucia is my eldest. She has seen me battle this the longest. She said to me yesterday for the hundredth time that I take the weight of the world on my shoulders. I told her that it is not the weight of the world I carry, but the weight of my sins. That those two weights are equivalent is evidence of the magnitude of my sins." he said.

Here was work for a High Priestess of Skyrim

"It is not a sin to wish that there be peace. It is not a sin to want happiness for all. It is not a sin to spend half your life rescuing orphans and giving them a home, and love. It is not a sin to give love and comfort to women in need of both, even if you are not Champions of Dibella" I said, prompting a smile. "You do not sin by wanting to do good, or by providing for a family you do not know or grieving for a young couple you do not know, or saving two girls you do not know. None of these are sins, they are quite the reverse. And you are mistaken. You have earned my trust by everything I have mentioned. Forgive my momentary lapse of memory."

"All those deaths." was all he said.

"I know they weigh on you heavily." I said. "War is synonymous with death, and this is a war, even if it is a clandestine one. The sin of war is as old as the world. It is not yours to bear. Not yours alone at least. The Gods judge us by what is in our hearts."

"In the mine, my heart was filled with anger." he said

"As was mine." I answered.

"A shared sin then." he said

"We can do penance together." I said.

"I would like that." he said.

"Then let us pray together. You do not know the prayer, but if you will listen to the words, I will pray for both of us." And I began the Prayer of Penance.

"Blessed Divines, grant us true contrition of soul, so that by day and night we may by penance make satisfaction for our sins..."

When I had finished it seemed to me that the sun had risen a second time this day.

* * *

The journey to Rorikstead was uneventful. We were observed by several small groups, all of whom reached the same conclusion.

Except for a group of wolves, who concluded that friends are too rare to let pass by. The girls had named the dog Joba. The wolves they did not give names, being stunned into silence seeing two wolves trot calmly up to the cart and spent the next hour playing with Joba. They left as we approached Rorikstead, Joba barking his farewell. 

"I have never seen anything like that before." Jyte said to Runa. "I would not have believed it if I had not seen it myself."

"That is a common reaction." Runa said. "But do not be deceived. In my father's absence they are wild animals and will kill you. Never trust any wild animal when our Father is not present." she said. 

Both Jyte and Kirsta looked at Aric then with a look I knew too well. There were no words I could think of that were better than those recently spoken to me. 

"Do not worship him." I said to them. “He is just a man. Love him, certainly, but do not worship him." 

"Yes, your Grace." they both said.

Your Grace. Gods.

* * *

"Honored Thane, Reverend Mother, you honor us with your presence, and for returning our lost lambs to us." 

He was the Alderman in Rorikstead, and someone had obviously overheard a portion of my conversation with Aric as the cart was being unloaded. 

"Mother Hamal shared her wisdom with me, as well as some advice. As it happens, her advice resembled yours." I said

"May I ask what she advised?" He asked me.

"She advised me to be a Priestess and, since I am now the most senior member of my order, to be a High Priestess. To start a new order." I said

"As I said, she is very wise. Reverend Mother Noxaura Jarnesus." he said. "I like the sound of that very much, Reverend Mother."

I laughed at the thought. 

Voices travel in small villages.

In the end, the responsibility for the hairbrush had been entrusted to me when we stopped a short distance from the village so the girl's hair could be brushed to a luster. Their reception did not disappoint. However, their attempts at regal behavior did not last long as their friends descended, and the laughing and giggling started. 

Jyte's bow was passed around to be envied. The shovel and broom less so, but still treasured by their recipients. All the provisions in the cart were appreciated and needed, but it was the healer's chest that brought the Alderman's wife to tears as she kissed my hands. 

"Bless you Reverend Mother. Many are still sick, my mother among them. It has been a difficult winter for the entire village."

"Dry your tears good lady and bring me to your mother. Rigel, bring the chest." 

It was a day for healers after that. They did not exaggerate. There was still much sickness in Rorikstead. 

It was well past dark before Aric and I had attended everyone and could relax in the Inn. 

"There are too many of us for the Inn." Aric said. The Alderman has offered me the manor house. He did so purely out of formality. His wife's mother cannot be moved. I declined. Lucia and Runa will sleep in the smaller rooms in the Inn, the Reverend Mother may sleep in the larger room. Jordis and Rigel will be comfortable on pallets on the Inn floor." Aric said.

"Comfortable may be overstating it." Jordis said.

"Shall not one of us always be on watch? We could certainly sleep under canvas." Rigel said

"We can leave the watch to the town guard, but you are free to modify your sleeping arrangements if you think you can still protect me from that distance." Aric said.

"You are not serious." Rigel said as everyone else hooted.

"Of course not." Aric said.

"Where will you sleep?" Lucia asked. 

"I will find a place. Do not worry." He said.

Several villagers, including Jyte and Krista's parents offered their homes. But he declined. It was time for the Reverend Mother to issue an Edict.

"The Thane is honorable, but under the circumstances he is being overnice. I am not so delicate that I cannot share a bedroom with a man. The Thane and I will share the larger room. This is the wish of the Reverend Mother." I said

Aric's face showed no change. Runa seemed to have developed a facial tick. Lucia suddenly discovered something in her eye and had to turn away.

"As the Reverend Mother wishes." was all Aric said.

An accommodation was reached that met the minimum level of security that Rigel felt necessary. Jordis surely had a different opinion on where she should sleep.

Dinner was festive. The village was well represented, given the level of sickness. Aric insured that the sick be fed and tended, leaving the festivities once to check on some of the sicker patients. He need not have worried. The village knew how to care for its own when provided with the means to do so, and the medicines and food we brought with us certainly gave them the means. He also visited the stables, visiting each of our horses and talking to each of them, even the carthorse who he had only recently acquired.

"The horses are warm and fed and happy and in need of nothing." He said as he returned. 

He was happy as well, it was clear, sitting in this small Inn with his daughters; the villagers stopping by to visit with the Thane. Surly a rare occurrence. Unless the Thane is Heimdall Aric Belrud Aamutähti. 

He is more at ease here than he ever appears to be in the cities, even in his own household. He enjoys talking with the villagers, talking about crops, listening to their concerns, accepting written petitions, and promising to present them to the Jarl. 'The Jarl' of course being Balgruuf even here at this far end of Whiterun, just a short distance from the authority of a different Jarl. A new Jarl, since the Empire ceded Markath to the Stormcloaks, in exchange for Riften. They were happy to still have the Jarl they knew and trusted, and they said so plainly. 

"Jarl Balgruuf stopped here last summer, sat in that chair you sit in now Thane. Said we had some of the best ale he ever drank."

They were proud of their village, their crops, their Jarl. Aric's mood was contagious, and we all became easier. 

Jyte and Kirsta stopped to offer their respects and thanks to Aric (in their finery of course. I gifted them the hairbrush). There was a shortage of chairs, so he stood while they talked. 

He lowered his voice as he said "You are both still young. You have full, prosperous lives ahead of you. Do not be afraid to dream about what you want most from life. Let those dreams be grand and follow them. You have sponsors if you chose to use them. You know how to contact Mother Hamal. Any letter you write to me in Whiterun will find me." They thanked him, and then me. 

"Reverend Mother, thank you for saving us and caring for us." 

"You are quite welcome." and then, because they both looked so pretty in their finery with their brushed hair, their parents standing nearby looking with pride at their daughters, I said "Please kneel here with me." and we all knelt there on the rug that had been placed there specifically so the Reverend Mother's feet would not have to rest on stone. I placed my hands upon each of their head and the room was completely still.

"Divines bless these young women that they may enjoy health, happiness, joy, purpose, abundance and long life." I began

* * *

The evening concluded, the festivities cleared away, the guests departed, and the owners as well. 

Jordis and Rigel moved a table in front of the door so no one could enter without a considerable disturbance, and the security accommodations were completed. 

Runa and Lucia went to bed. Jordis and Rigel made comfortable pallets from an abundance of materials provided by the village. 

Aric, the Champion of Dibella, at whom more women than I could count have given The Look, seemed a little awkward. "Please go to bed, I will sit up a bit more." he said. 

"Unless you wish me to get out of bed and sit up with you, you will go to bed yourself very soon." I said. I sounded calm, but my heart was beating as if it would burst when he finally appeared in the doorway. 

"What are you holding?" I asked him

"Material to make a pallet on the floor. The villagers brought enough material for five pallets." he said as he started to place material on the floor.

"There is no need for that. You are entitled to your half of the bed." I said.

"I do not think it would be appropriate." he said, not looking at me; pretending to arrange his pallet.

I could not believe what I was witnessing.

"Heimdall Aric Belrud Aamutähti, are you nervous?" I asked

"Somewhat." he said.

I could not help it. The glee in my laughter was clear. The entire Inn could not help but hear. "The Champion of Dibella is nervous to share a bed with me?"

"It has been a long journey, and I have not bathed." he said

If they had not heard my laughter before it must surely be ringing across the whole village now. My face hurt from the laughing, an exquisite pain.

"I have not bathed either." I reminded him when I could find enough breath to speak. My laughter had receded, but my smile had not. He was still being sheepish, but now at least he would look directly at me.

"It is different for women." he said. "Women have a natural fragrance. Men just smell bad."

 _My face will crack in half if this smiling continues._ I thought

"How can you possibly be this nervous? Are you this nervous with other women?" I asked

"Other women?" he asked

"Gods! Yes! Other women! Would you please stop arranging that pallet?"

"I apologize." he said, as he ceased his fussing.

"Other women, Champion of Dibella, other women. Gods! All those women who look at you with carnal fascination. You cannot be this nervous with them." I said

"That is different." he said.

"Different how?" I asked.

"I have not simply shared a bed with a woman in quite some time. Not since I was a boy. All the women I have shared a bed with since then did so because they desired something else from me. When sleep came afterwards it came as an intertwining of limbs, a soft pressure of warm, damp skin. Shared heartbeats and breathing. This is different and I do not want you to have a bad opinion of me or think me rude." he said.

I felt my temperature rise as he was speaking, his voice soft as he described two bodies becoming one. It was not only my face that was hot now. It was for a different reason now that I had trouble breathing.

"You are very sweet, but I find it hard to believe that you could do such a poor job of laying on one side of a mattress and falling asleep that it would affect my opinion of you." I said

"With anyone else, my laying down and going to sleep would be considered impolite." he said.

"I am not anyone else." I said

"That is most definitely true." he said.

I did my best impression of Mother Pevel: “You will cease your tugging at that poor material, and you will lay on your side of the mattress and you will go to sleep." I said, the glee returning to my voice. "This is the wish of the Reverend Mother."

He stood up, dropped the bedding he was carrying and smiled, finally making full eye contact with me. "As the Reverend Mother wishes" he said.

It was the next-to-last time I smiled before falling asleep. Whatever emotions crossed my face after that do not count.


	15. I am battered, but not defeated

**24th of First Seed**

"You will not believe who has just entered the Inn and asking for breakfast." Jordis said

Our agreement with the Innkeeper was that they would still open on time, so it was still early when we heard the noise of the table being moved away from the door and bedding being collected. But our room was still dark (except for the night light), the bed was still warm, as was Aric, laying on his side.

It took him a while to fall asleep last night, and he was restless; but eventually his shifting around ceased and his breathing slowed to a quiet rhythm. 

He was not the first man with whom I had shared a bed. I took lovers from time to time. But it had been a considerable time since then. 

But the bed was certainly larger than those I had shared with Sara, and it was only a few times that I woke to find that we had drifted together in our sleep. At one point my head was on his shoulder, his cheek pressed to my forehead. He was sound asleep, finally comfortable. I could have stayed like that forever. But I slowly moved away. He sensed it, and stirred, but settled again.

But the sounds of the Inn coming to life this morning ended our rest, though it seemed like neither of us was in a hurry to leave the warmth of the covers.

"Honored Thane." I said as he looked at me from six inches away, some of yesterday evening's mirth returning to my voice "You survived the overnight battle of which you were so worried."

"I did survive. I am battered, but not defeated." he said, making it sound like an epic achievement.

"Battered? Have I battered you sir? In what way?" I asked, propping up on my elbow, my false indignation growing.

"It is nothing." He said, now sounding like a dying hero.

"Tell me." I said in my most queenly voice as I sat straight up. "I insist."

"Very well. May I ask when last you cut your toenails madam?" he asked.

"Toenails? My toenails sir?" I asked, my laughter starting again.

"Yes madam, your toenails. The scratches on my legs will lead villagers to believe that I shared a bed last night with a saber cat." he said

"What sir? Are you serious, sir?" I said "What an inappropriate thing to say to a High Priestess! You are impudent sir! If ever you truly share a bed with me, sir, I will show you a saber cat!" my feigned anger spoiled by my laughter

"I fear that I may need to call my housecarls to protect me." He said, looking towards the door.

It was while I was pummeling him with my pillow that the knock on the door came and Jordis delivered her news about the breakfast guests.

* * *

"Hail, Companions. I hope I find you both well." Aric said

"Hail Companion, Dragonborn, and Thane." said Vilkas. "We wondered who was being murdered in the room next door. We are both well. Hungry, but well." Vilkas said.

"Runa and Lucia were seated with the two Companions, not having stopped to don armor or dress properly. It appeared from their condition that the two brothers had slept in their armor. On a bed of straw. Abundant straw.

It did not escape their notice that I entered the main room of the Inn through the same door that Aric had, though a few moments later. I recognized Vilkas from Whiterun, but this was my first meeting with his brother Farkas. I was about to greet the two when the door to the Inn opened again.

"Reverend Mother, there are two warriors from Whiterun sleeping in the stable!" Kirsta said.

"You are mistaken, child." I said. "There are two warriors from Whiterun sitting at this table awaiting their breakfast." I replied, “And all of us would benefit from you speaking more quietly this early in the morning, particularly while you are indoors.”

“Yes, your Grace.” She replied.

"Reverend Mother, you remember Vilkas, I am sure. This is his brother Farkas." Lucia said.

“Divines attend you and keep you safe in your journeys, Companions.” I said.

"I am afraid that it is our fault that you had such poor accommodations last night. I trust it was not too much of an inconvenience." Aric said.

"We have slept in much worse places, as you well know brother." Farkas said.

"We can at least make amends and offer you an excellent breakfast." Aric said.

"And excellent company." Vilkas said looking at Lucia.

"You are too kind, sir" Lucia said to Vilkas.

"Lucia has a book of poems you might like." Runa said to Vilkas

"Excuse me please while I murder my sister." Lucia said as she dragged Runa to her room.

"May I ask what brings you the edge of Whiterun, brothers?" Aric asked

"There was an incident on the road south from Dragon's Bridge. Kodlack asked us to inquire." Vilkas said.

“An incident?” Aric asked.

"A company of Thalmor was slaughtered, no trace of who is responsible, no bodies, no weapons, nothing. Kodlack thought that was unusual, possible unnatural." Farkas said

"Unnatural?" I asked

"Yes, your grace. Enemies that attack and then disappear like smoke." Vilkas said

" _Noncor_ something" Farkas said

"Non-corporeal?" I asked.

"That was it." Farkas said.

"Indeed, that would be unusual. And unnatural." I said, glancing at Aric, who returned the glance. Kirsta and Jyte exchanged a similar glance but said nothing.

"What did you conclude?" Aric asked.

"That the reports were correct. No trace of those responsible." Vilkas said.

Breakfast arrived, together with Runa and Lucia. Properly dressed and brushed this time. Krista and Jyte were clearly smitten by the two Companions. Two mature, but young, strong, well developed warriors, though one of those warriors only had eyes for Lucia. It quickly became a community breakfast, and a merry one. I excused myself and went to check on the villagers who Aric and I had treated the day before. All would recover, though some would require more time. All expressed their gratitude. More than once I said "Please keep it for yourself, and your village. My payment will be to visit you during the summer season and see you well."

After that it was "Reverend Mother, would you bless our cow?" and "Reverend Mother, would you bless our crops?" I was becoming quite skilled. Or so I thought.

"Reverend Mother would you marry us?" the young woman asked

"What?" I said

"We would like it very much if you would marry us your Grace." the young man said.

"How old are you?" I asked

"Seventeen." They said together.

"Are you not a bit young to marry?" I asked

"My mother was seventeen when she married." the girl said.

"And we love each other. I never want to marry anyone else." the boy said

"I swear I will never marry anyone else." the girl said.

"What are your parents' opinions of this marriage?" I asked

"They say we are too young! We are not too young!" the girl said, practically stamping her foot.

"I am almost old enough to join the legion." the boy said, stretching his body towards the sky.

"And the temple of Mara in Riften is so far to travel. Our parents will not pay for the trip." the girl said

"But you are a High Priestess of a Holy Order. You could marry us, couldn't you?" the boy asked.

 _I have not the slightest idea._ I thought. But that answer would not do.

"I am sorry children, but we leave very soon, and there is not enough time to make the necessary arrangements for a wedding." I said. "Come now, do not look so downtrodden. All is not lost. I will be back again during the summer season. And if you still wish to be married at that time, I will certainly marry you." I said.

"You handled that very deftly." Aric said after I recounted episode.

"They are both so young. And eager. And it is First Love for both. You should have seen how they looked at each other. But they seemed happy at the prospect of a summer wedding. The young man intends to use the time to fix up the damaged cottage at the edge of the village to be their home." I said.

"Some of us receive that exact look daily when we are in Whiterun." Runa said.

"I will burn you to a crisp where you sit." Lucia said to her sister.

"We can send spies to reconnoiter before returning this summer if you like." Aric said, “The state of the cottage would indicate the state of the engagement."

"I cannot decide whether that is an excellent idea, or whether I should pummel you again." I said

"As we may be sharing a bed again tomorrow night in Falkreath you have ample time to make your decision." he replied, matching my tone of voice and smile.

It was at that point everyone else remembered they had something that needed their attention.

* * *

"You have certainly taken Mother Hamal's advice to heart. Reverend Mother Noxaura was in her element in Rorikstead. The villagers were quite taken with you. I will not be surprised this summer when we return to find a shrine in your likeness." Aric said.

Rigel had insisted that she would be safe on her own returning to Markath, but it was obvious to everyone that she was enjoying herself and did not wish this time to end. Aric's decision was therefore partly to grant her wish but also honest concern. "This section of road is still unsettled. Bandits, Foresworn, and Thalmor are all unusually active. If I had a squad of Guard to send with you it would be different. Best we continue together to Falkreath. I will hire guards, and you can return from there." he said. And so, we continued our journey, our small cart and cart horse awaiting Rigel’s return.

"You are, as always, too kind. They are a remote village of honest villagers. The have expectations of Religious Orders. It would be impolite to disappoint or confuse them. I have experience with villages like this. Including my own." I said "But I will admit that it is the most I have felt myself in some time. The Thane of Whiterun was also in his element I noticed. Talking of crops, and the rains, petitions to the Jarl. Holding court in an Inn. They were quite taken with you as well." I said

"It is my responsibility, but also my privilege as Thane, to inquire into the health of the villages within the Hold. It is one of my most favored duties." he said.

"It was plain to see why they like you as they do. You were completely at ease with them, and they with you. I cannot recall a time when I saw you more at ease." I said.

"I find a warm, natural comfort in such places. They have their own magic." He was quiet for a moment before he spoke again. "I have some small reputation in Skyrim." he began

 _Gods._ I thought. _He is known the length and breadth of Skyrim. With good reason._

"But there are still places where I am not know, at least not recognized; where I can find an Inn, and put off armor and weapons and wear comfortable clothes and sit in the Inn and listen to fragments of conversations, or the local bard, or the sound of the fire. On rare occasions, perhaps, a campsite under the stars. Freya and I, or Lydia and I, in our earlier days. Just the two of us, the stars, the sound of the fire, the horses, the wind. There is a special beauty to a snowy campsite, with a sufficient supply of furs, and a warm fire. All the different beautiful magics that nature provides us." he said.

"What a beautiful picture you paint." I said, "You have the gift of artistry, of poetry." I said.

"Your opinion would change immediately where you to read any poetry I have written." He replied.

"You have written poetry?" I asked

"And prose." he replied. "I am trying to not take your look of astonishment personally, but it is becoming difficult given how long the look persists."

"I apologize, I did not mean it in that way. My astonishment is in the number of gifts you possess." I said

"Now you are being too kind. Best you reserve judgement on my writing, and whether it is a gift" he said.

"Will I have the opportunity to form my own opinion of your writing?" I asked

"Never." he said while he laughed.

"I am disappointed." I said, feigning grief. "Which other of your gifts will I never experience?" I asked

"You will never see me juggle." he said

It was my turn to laugh then, as we continued our way.

The number of our party (the two-legged variety at least) had remained the same, though the members had changed. Jyte and Kirsta had remained in Rorikstead, as had Joba. Vilkas and Farkas kept company with us the first day. 

We made camp near a dragon mound at the point where our roads diverged, the Companions continuing east to Whiterun, our road turning south to Falkreath. It was an impressive camp once it was established. Four tents, eight horses. two large fires. It was the largest camp I have ever stayed in, and the merriest. 

Our camps before this had always been small. Aric and Samuel in one tent, Sara and me in another. Serana never seemed to sleep when we traveled. I was still grieving during those camps and plotting murder; not in any mood to acknowledge the magic that Aric had described: nature's magic. 

This camp was different. Larger. Merrier. Farkas was quiet, rarely speaking. I could not look at him and not feel in some way guilty. I was silent myself, watching the two brothers and two sisters talking and laughing. Even Farkas laughed from time to time. He and Runa shared a comfortable silence later as Vilkas and Lucia walked a short distance under the starlight. They were a hansom couple.

"Tell me about your first adventure with Your father." I said to Lucia after she and Vilkas had returned. “You spoke only of the results when we were in Whiterun, not the particulars.”

It took a moment for Aric and Lucia to stop laughing at the mere thought of the outing. Runa rolled her eyes.

"You would have thought we were going off to the wars." Aric said as Lucia continued to laugh

"How old were you?" I asked her.

"Fourteen. You should have seen me, in my oversized armor. I could barely see with my helm on. I thought I looked very impressive in it." she said.

"You looked like a set of elven armor had swallowed you whole." Farkas said as his brother laughed and nodded.

"Not the same armor you are wearing now, surly." I said

"No, a smaller version of what she is wearing now. It was still too large." Aric said

"You did not laugh when you saw me return." Lucia reminded them.

"No." Vilkas said "Not when I saw all the blood."

"You had seen blood before." Lucia said.

"Not on you. I was sure when I saw you that you had been mortally wounded." he said.

"He faced lost all complexion when he saw you. I thought he would faint." Farkas said. All humor left the brothers as they remembered that moment. Until:

"Then I saw the condition of Your father's face." Vilkas said

"It was not my fault!" Lucia screamed. "I was young, and nervous, and it was my first battle." she said to much laughter, all humor returning.

"Battle may be overstating it." Runa said

"Mind your own business." Lucia told her sister.

"It was more than what I had intended for her first outing." Aric said. "If you had seen how nervous I was taking her out of Whiterun Gate you would have thought it was my first battle I was heading off to."

"Where did you take her?" I asked him.

"About ten feet down the road." Runa said.

"Shut Up!" Lucia commanded.

"The fort to the west of Whiterun. Fort Greymoor. It is constantly changing hands between different bandit groups. It is on the main road, and they prey on travelers. The Jarl regularly orders the bandits cleared from the fort, but others always return."

"We accompanied Jergen a few times ourselves, to clear the fort of bandits." Farkas said. "It was the first battle we fought together as well."

"I had not expected it to be so heavily manned. I was badly mistaken and, by the time I realized my mistake they were upon us. Archers, mages and warriors." Aric said. The look on his face, his unfocused vision had silenced everyone. No more quips from Runa, who had grabbed Lucia's hand in hers.

"I had kept Lucia well behind me, but that also turned into a dangerous mistake. I had crept up to the fort, and was under the arch at the main entrance, behind some rubble when the archers in the fort engaged, pinning me behind the rubble, just as the archers I had not seen on the top of the arch engaged Lucia outside the fort. I could not engage the archers attacking her from my position, and the archers and mages in the fort kept me from retreating, as the warriors advanced on me. I was about to cast a ward to cover my retreat when a series of fireballs passed by just to the right of my head. I thought that one of their mages had maneuvered around behind us, and I turned to see Lucia charging up from behind me, a ward in her left hand, fire in her right. She had taken a serious toll on the bandits. All the archers on top of the arch were now lying in the courtyard. One mage was dead as were some of the warriors and archers inside the fort. Any order they had started out with was gone. They had seriously underestimated that young warrior in oversized armor, and they paid dearly for it. Nearer to the end they tried to overwhelm her with numbers, and she had to resort to her dagger, and close quarter fighting, a ward, a stone skin spell, and her dagger. By then I was finally able to assist her, though anyone observing her would have concluded that she did not need my help."

"It was ebony skin." Lucia said after a moment of silence.

Aric started to laugh in the silence. "I was so relieved afterwards that I made us run halfway back to Whiterun just to get her home quicker." he said.

"It was for the best. It was easier to hide how much I was shaking while we were running." Lucia said through her own laughter.

"The guards at the western watchtower saw us approaching. They can see the fort from the tower, and heard some of the battle surely, and saw the fireballs certainly. They saw Lucia's armor still slick with blood from the bandits that fell to her dagger and gave her a welcome fit for a hero." he said as he looked at his daughters with admiration and damp eyes. "which she was. And is. As are all my daughters."

 _How could I ever think that he needed some special magic or power to make me love him?_ I thought as Father and daughters embraced.

"That was quite an experience for your first adventure." I said

"It is no easy fort to assault." Vilkas said. "We learned that ourselves. I thanked Talos that you returned uninjured."

"I had injuries, but they were minor. I had to wear extra under-padding because the armor was too large, so when the arrows penetrated, they had farther to go to reach me.

"You looked like you had been attacked by squirrels." Runa said, quips having returned to the menu.

"Runa what was your first adventure like?" I asked

"We do not have time for that story." she said.

"It is not a contest." Lucia said to her sister.

"I do not understand." I said, looking from one to the other.

"It was a Dwemer ruin." Runa said simply.

"WHAT!?" I cried looking hard at Aric

"In my defense, Runa is my fourth daughter, my comfort level with first outings had risen considerably, and there were several of us in that party." Aric said. his hands raised in mock protection.

"More than just a simple walk down the road." Runa said dryly as she took a drink.

"Refresh my memory please. How many dragons have you ridden?" Lucia asked her sister.

"WHAT!?" I cried for the second time in as many minutes.

Aric's hand, having only just been lowered, flew back up again. "It is not as dangerous as it sounds." he said. Nothing with ears within a day’s journey could possibly miss the sound of our laughter.

The hour grew late so, with the promise of a thorough recounting of Runa’s first outing and Lucia's dragon ride later, the order of the watch was set. The housecarls and the brothers would each stand two-hour watches. 

"It is not right for the Thane's daughters to stand watch." Vilkas said

"Besides, the two of you would kill anything that attacked us too quickly for the rest of us to join in." Farkas said.

I excused myself, used what accommodations we have arranged for that purpose, and went off to my tent to the sounds of “Good night Reverend Mother” from more than one voice.

"The Divines guard you and keep you safe." I said to Farkas, who had the first watch.

"You appear to be empty handed, sir. Where is the overabundant material for your pallet?" I said from inside my bedroll as Aric appeared at the tent opening, the merriment from earlier in the evening still infecting me.

"Sarcasm this late in the evening is unbecoming in a High Priestess your Grace." he said as he crawled into the tent, closed the opening.

"You consume too much of the tent, sir!" I said, bumping his shoulder with mine.

"Your geometry at fault, madam. I am entirely on my side of the tent." he said as he crawled into his bedroll and bumped my shoulder in return.

"You do know that some of us are actually trying to sleep, do you not?" Lucia said loud enough to be heard in Falkreath.

Aric and I kept our laughing to a reasonable volume.

When I awoke with my head on his shoulder later that night, I made no attempt to move away.


	16. You may yet have your heart’s desire

**25th of First Seed**

While Farkas had the first watch, Vilkas had the last. So, it surprised no one to see Lucia and Vilkas sharing the last few minutes of the watch together. It was a cold breakfast this morning, packing of equipment, a short walk for Lucia and Vilkas, ending with her hand on his arm and a smile on his face and him giving her a flower, and then the Companions continued east as we turned south.

“Reverend Mother Pevel was fond of saying ‘When a person’s actions differ from his word, believe the actions over the words.’ Lucia’s actions do not match her words where Vilkas is involved.” I said to Aric later.

“She is very fond of him.” Aric said. “Not quite as fond as he is of her, but not so much less as she would have everyone think.”

“He is not fond of her; he is in love with her.” I said

“ _Anurakti_.” He said, ending the word as a sigh.

“What does that mean?” I asked him. Will I ever have the courage to ask him about his past?

“It means _Love._ The question: _What is Love_ is possibly the most asked question in human history, spanning theologies and philosophies.” Aric said.

“You and Railius would have been friends.” I said with a sad heart.

“I am sorry I did not know him. Tell me something about him.” He said.

“He was older than you. He was officially my servant since I paid him. He was unofficially my father. He has known me since I was a child. I was prone to asking questions, not simply accepting what I was told as absolute, and as a result Mother Catilia was prone to chastising me. If she did so in private, he would tell me afterwards ‘Don’t you pay her no mind. You are smarter that she is, and she don’t like that.” If she did it in his presence, he would walk behind her where she could not see and make a face at me. It took all my will not to laugh.” I said. “He liked reading philosophy.”

“We should erect a shrine for him where he lies now.” Aric said

“No. He would say it was too much for a simple soldier, which he used to be. He was a sergeant in the Imperial Legion.” I said.

“Too much for a soldier, but not too much for your father, surrogate or otherwise.” He said. “Besides, he can hardly object now.”

“Do not be too sure. He could be stubborn as a mule.” I replied.

“You have time to consider it.” He said. “It is not like he is going anywhere.”

Our journey to Falkreath continued, and I thought about the first journey I ever took with him. For most of that journey I had been plotting his death, my mind taken up with plans and schemes, no time to notice the surroundings, I had almost no memory of Rorikstead from that journey. Wearing Serana’s borrowed clothes, glum and mute, it is no wonder no one in Rorikstead recognized me.

How different this journey is from that one. Two months. I have known him barely two months. I did not know what to make of him then. I still don’t. It was not love that made my heart race then. It is now. Will tonight be the night that we truly share a bed? If so, I must be the one to act. He will not, he is too much the gentleman. But I am too much the coward. It would crush my heart if he declined. Worse if he accepted because he did not know how to decline. He is more than a decade older than I am. He has had so many more lovers than I have. He must know how to say ‘No’ in the politest manner. But if he said ‘Yes’ would I ever know why? Would it become a wedge between us when it should bring us closer? What am I thinking? I heard how he and Lydia spoke to each other, and I saw how he and Elisif looked at each other. Why do I wish for something that I can never have?

“You are lost in your thoughts.” Aric said.

His voice brought me back to reality. “Yes, the past two months have given me much to think about.” I said. And then I made a decision. “Including your advice to me in Solitude. Clearly, I cannot continue as your hose guest forever. Now that I have means I should find a home to live in. After that, I will pray for guidance.”

“You are welcome to stay with us as long as you wish.” He said.

Us. Not me. “You are kind, but I am a grown woman and I should have a home I can call my own.” I said.

“I understand.” He said. “Please allow me to assist you when the time comes. Any city in Tamriel would welcome you. There are several properties in Skyrim I know of that can be purchased and built upon. I know of two wonderful cottages for sale, though they are in the north, and I remember your aversion to cold.”

“My aversion was to what seemed like a year riding the northern roads of Skyrim in Winter. You forget that I have lived in the north for some time.

“Balgruuf is also considering selling his hunting cottage located between Whiterun and Riverwood. You could inquire after that while we are visiting our guest who resides in the Dragon’s Reach dungeons.”

I had forgotten that an interview with the man who ordered and paid for my death awaited us.

“I had forgotten. We can ask him why he did not hire the Assassin’s Guild, which is what you were contemplating against him.”

He was quiet for a moment. “I am glad he did not. I would have killed whomever they sent. A war with the Guild is not something we need now. We are fighting on too many fronts as it is.”

He was quiet again for a while “So, your choices right now seem to be all of Tamriel, a home near Dawnstar, a home near Markath, a home near Whiterun, or property in any hold that you may build on as you wish.” 

“From an abandoned shack in the Rift to so many choices.” I said. 

“If you decide to build, remember to include sufficient space for guests. We do not intend to become strangers.” He replied.

I occupied my mind with several plans for houses that might be purchased, or could be built, all perfect for two people.

* * *

It was during a rest stop that I noticed Lucia still had the flower that Vilkas gave her.

“Today is a Breton holiday, known as Flower Day.” Lucia said.

“Vilkas has become quite a scholar on holidays.” Runa said. “Or anything else that allows him an excuse to give Lucia gifts.”

“He is just being nice.” Lucia said.

“He has never given me anything.” Runa said.

“Your discretion does you credit.” I said to Lucia. “I hope it is only that, and not that you are truly blind to how he feels towards you.”

“And how does he feel towards me?” she asked, her relaxed demeanor vanishing.

“He is completely in love with you, and very close to worshiping you.” I said.

“You reach that conclusion with little evidence.” She said. “You barely know him.”

“I know him well enough to recognize what my eyes plainly see. It happens that I have some recent experience being in love with someone whom I almost worship, so perhaps it is easier for me to see it in others.” I said

They could not possibly misinterpret my words, and by their faces I knew they did not. Runa excused herself.

“He seems a good man. He clearly loves you. He is yours for the asking, if you are brave, and willing, and if you feel as he does. If you feel otherwise you should release him. It is a terrible thing to love someone you cannot have.” I said.

“You have recent experience in that as well?” she asked me.

“I do.” I said.

She was quiet for a moment. “Thank you for your honesty, your grace.” She said

“Noxaura. You know I do not deserve that title, or any other.” I said

“Noxaura.” She said before hugging me and kissing my cheek. She is a head taller than I am and must bend to do both. “You deserve that title and much more.” She said. “Reverend Mother.” Which made me laugh as I was drying my eyes.

* * *

“You are quite free with your advice on relationships.” Runa said as we rode. We had never ridden side by side before. Lucia had asked to speak with her father, she and I had traded places as we continued our journey south.

“I apologize if I offended either of you. I spoke my mind in a moment of weakness. As I said to Your father, I have not been myself recently.” I said

“You do not need to apologize to me. I tell her often to state her feelings plainly. She and Vilkas are a match in that regard. Neither will simply say what they feel.” She replied.

“She can have her heart’s desire if that is what Vilkas is. She does not know how great a gift that is. I suspect no one ever does. We only know how great a curse it is when our heart’s desire is denied to us.” I said.

“I showed the book of poems to Farkas, during his first watch.” Runa said.

I looked at her in surprise.

“It is not only Lucia who loiters about when it is someone else’s watch” she said.

I smiled at the thought.

“You are quite direct. You will never have a career in diplomacy. You are too honest, prone to go immediately to the truth. There is no left or right, none of the orthogonal approach that diplomacy requires.” I said

“The straight line is the quickest route.” Runa said

“What did Farkas think of the book?” I asked

“He read a poem or two, and then asked: ‘Why does he not just say ‘I love you’ to her? He wastes time and words.”

“I see that Farkas is also direct.” I said

“Do you know anything of the book of poetry that Calcelmo gave us?” Runa asked

“No. Only that he is the author.”

“Calcelmo was in love with Faleen, Jarl Igmund’s housecarl. The high Priestess of Mara in Riften gave my father the task of bringing the two together. My father presented a love poem written by Calcelmo to Faleen, which won her heart. The book came later.” She said

“Mara? Not Dibella.” I asked

“Yes, Mara. My father is an agent of Mara.” She said

I was astonished. “Is there any deity that has not awarded your father agency?”

Her brow furrowed. “I will have to consider that.” She said. “Once the Stormcloaks claimed Markath Jarl Igmund was given refuge in Solitude, and Faleen accompanied him. Calcelmo makes the pilgrimage as often as his duties allow.”

“I rejoice in his blessing.” I said.

“You may yet have your heart’s desire.” Runa said

“His heart lies elsewhere.” I said

“You surrender too quickly.” She said

“I saw how they looked at each other.” I said. “I am fully capable of recognizing a curse when I see one.”

“I will not pretend to not know who you mean.” she said “or what you said to him in Markath. It hurt him, whatever he may have said. I am happy that both of you have come to a better understanding of each other’s true nature. After that, it was inevitable that you would love him and, I suspect, he would love you. Do not turn you head in that manner; you will damage your neck.”

“he does not love me. Elisif has his heart.” I said

“His heart is larger than you think, as is his capacity for love.” She said

“I have lost count of the number of women who, by all appearance, love him.” I said

“You would need barely one hand to count the number of women he truly loves. And most of those are his daughters. It is possible, though, he may soon require the use of a second hand.” She replied.

“There seems to be a constriction in my clothing, my head lacks blood flow.” I said, feeling lightheaded.

“Wait for a dryer section of road if you must fall off your horse. It is too muddy here.” Runa said.

“I see that a career as a Healer is also not in your future, not with that bed side manner.” I said

“Reverend Mother, I believe you have the gift of True Sight.” she said.

* * *

We were in sight of the old Falkreath watchtower when Jordis and Rigel stopped. We were keeping a proper interval, and the two were still several horse lengths ahead of Aric and Lucia when Jordis raised her hand in a signal for our column to halt. Rigel stayed where she was as Jordis turned and rode back. Che arrived at Aric just as Runa and I did.

“There are spotters on the old watch tower. They waited too long before concealing themselves. They are not visible now, but they are there. There is also the glint of weapons and armor from the opposite side of the road, in that stand of rocks and trees.” She said.

“Are they fewer than eighty in number?” Runa asked.

“unless there is another group hiding somewhere farther away there cannot be more than a dozen hiding in the rocks and trees. And they would have to be dedicated indeed to attempt to hide more than six in the tower, including the two we observed at the top of the tower.” She said.

“It hardly seems like a challenge. Perhaps you would prefer if Lucia and Rigel and I waited while the three of you dispatched them?” Runa asked Aric.

“Or the three of you can have this group. We fought the last group, so it is your turn.” Jordis said to her.

“Are you sure that you two are not secretly sisters?” I asked

“May I make a suggestion?” Lucia asked.

“Certainly.” Aric said

“Dragon attacks in this region have been rather common.” She said.

I had no idea what she meant.

“I am not calling a dragon for only eighteen men.” Aric said.

My mouth hung open for a moment before I could speak. “You can call a dragon?”

“In a manner of speaking. Some of the dragons are acquaintances and may come to my aid if I call, mostly because they enjoy the fighting.” He said.

“You did not call one on the road.” I said to him

“We were too close to Dragon’s Bridge.” He said

“Signal Rigel to return.” He said to Jordis.

“Rigel, Runa and Lucia will remain here. Jordis, and I will ride back down the road and take the trail leading to the tower. It is on the opposite side of the tower and will hide us from the men hiding across the road.

“They will see you ride back down the road. And the men in the tower will not lose sight of you for a moment.” Lucia said.

“True. That is why you three will remain here until we reach the path, then you may resume your ride down the road, but slowly. Jordis and I will investigate the tower and assault it if necessary. What happens next will depend on what those hidden men do. 

“Your arithmetic is faulty sir. You have miscounted the number of your party.” I said.

“I have not madam. I exceed my comfort level with risk when I risk you.” He said.

“I was at serious risk on the south road. I demonstrated that I am no shrinking flower.” I said.

“I would never suggest you were. We did not have a choice then, we do now.” He said.

“If we have a choice, then I chose to fight and protect my friends. Or am I a simple soldier, obedient to your orders, sir?” I asked

“You are under no one’s orders, your grace, and your predisposition to question authority is well known.” He said with a smile.

“I would knock you off your horse, sir, if I were closer to you, and ten stone heavier.” I said with my own smile evident.

“Flirting before dinner time upsets my stomach. As Lucia knows.” Runa said.

“Please feel free to assault that large group of concealed men single handed.” Lucia replied to her sister.

“I would prefer to have archers trained on the tower and the road while we made our assault.” Aric said. He thought a moment.

“Jordis and Rigel, take up positions on either side of the road. Prevent the tower from firing down on any of us. If the men in the trees charge, you may keep them busy while Lucia and Runa engage them.” He turned to me.

“And what shall we do?” I asked.

“We will begin by acquainting the residents of the tower with the local wildlife.” He said, his smile returning.

* * *

“You should be awarded high marks for creativity.” I said as we left our horses and walked up the path to the ruins of the tower. “I will insist on reading your poetry.”

“let us wait and see how this plan progresses.” He said.

“The tower seems much taller up close. Are you sure it will suffice?” I asked

“It will be more than enough. Do you remember the plan?” he asked.

“Mostly because you repeated it to me for the third only a few moments ago, I will answer ‘Yes’”.” I said.

“Very well.” He said.

Conjuring a familiar was the first spell I learned as a novitiate. As a result, I thought I was prepared for what he described. I was not prepared for a huge bird of prey to appear a begin its flight to the top of the tower. I cast my own spell and a wolf appeared and ran into the tower door. We had agreed to wait a short time for our familiars to have an effect. I cast my bound sword as Aric was rushing up the stairs ahead of me.

They had already retreated up the steps at the sight of the wolf. The sight of Aric gave them incentive to hasten their retreat, but the sound coming from above had the opposite effect, and effect enhanced by the body of one of the spotters from the roof falling down the stairs, knocking the wolf off the steps and ending the conjuring in the process.

Aric had not brought a bow, and the men on the stairs had none. Aric drew his sword. The two men on the stairs had already drawn theirs. I had by bound sword, but Aric was in front of me, between me and the stairs. He cast a spell that I could not see.

“Here is death if you wish it.” He said, his voice sounding like death itself. It made me shudder.

“Or chose life. Drop your weapons. Run. My arm is long and can reach you no matter where you hide. Never forget that.”

The first man did not hesitate. The second took his cue from the first. They left their weapons on the stairs, the looks of fear on their faces as they ran by us and out of the tower stayed burned in my mind for some time.

Aric turned back to me, and I gasped and stepped backwards before I knew what I was doing.

His face was a mask of death. My heart was pounding in my chest, the sound of a drum beating inside my head.

A motion of his hand and the mask was gone. He gave me a moment to recover before continuing up the stairs.

“I am sorry I upset you.” He said later. “I have seen men like those two. Young, misguided, often taken from their families against their will. They may yet be saved. Their hearts are not yet corrupted beyond redemption. It may be that I am mistaken. I hope that I am right. I am weary of robbing mothers of their sons.” 

There were three bodies on the top of the tower, one at the base of the tower next to the road. The bird of prey had moved on to the men who had left their cover to attack the four women on the road. Unlike their Thane and Father, those women gave no quarter. The bird of prey picked up one of the men and carried him very high before the conjuring ended in mid-flight. That man had slightly more time to consider his demise than the rest, but not much more. 

Jordis and Rigel plied their bows with mastery from distance. Runa had opted to forgo magic and rely entirely on her sword, with devastating effect. 

But it was Lucia I could not take my eyes from. She wielded magic as if she was engaged in a dance. Her motions were a spell of their own. Fluid, graceful. And powerful. I knew she was adopted. The first child Aric adopted, and that she must have a special place in his heart, but that they shared no blood relation. Yet I could still see her Father in her. No hesitation, no doubt. Beauty. Mastery. She could be a Queen in any land she desired. And, I thought as I looked at him, he could be a King.

“She is a joy to watch.” He said. His eyesight is unsurpassed. Of course, he saw me watching her.

“She has an artistry to her movements, even when those movements are delivering death.” I said

“I was as nervous as a new bride during our first outing.” He said. “Many of the calming and courage spells I have used on myself were during first adventures. I do not think I understood fear until that day at the Fort. I had one thought repeating in my mind: ‘this is my fault.’ Lydia thought I was wounded when we returned, and I was near collapse with what I had almost done to my daughter. “

He seemed so vulnerable in that moment, like a glass figure that would break if mishandled. I could have put my arms around him and held him forever.

“Yet you still teach them. Train them. Bring them out on their first adventures.” I said. 

“This is a hard world we live in. It kills the weak. It kills the unprepared. It will eventually kill me. All my children know these things. I have sworn that none of them would ever be victims again. They have all chosen their own paths, and I have tried to give them the tools and skills they need to travel that path. To survive and flourish.” He said.

“You love your children very much.” I said

“I love what is natural for me to love.” He said, as he moved close to me, reached out and held my hand in his.

My eyes consumed him. I could look at him for eternity.

“Are you going to stand on that tower for the rest of the day?” we heard someone shout from the road.

* * *

“I could lay here and look up at that sky forever.” Railius said. “Look at all them stars.”

“You _are_ going to lay here and look up at that sky forever.” I reminded him.

“You know what I mean.” He said “Nothing we ever build will be as beautiful that. The Gods give us that free of charge.” He was quiet for a few moments. “Remember to look up at nights. Look around in the daytime. All that beauty to behold, free of charge.”

“Much of what I see now is not beauty.” I said.

“I know.” He said.

“I miss you.” I said to him. “I miss the sound of your voice, your laughter, your wisdom. I miss falling asleep on your shoulder to the motion of our cart.”

“No one ever called me wise but you.” He said.

“Then no one else knew you. You are the wisest person I know.” I told him.

“You have another man to rely on these days. He’s a good man. You could do much worse.” He said.

“His heart belongs to another.” I said.

“You don’t know where his heart lies. You barely know your own heart. Besides, I see how he looks at you.” He said.

“You see much for someone resting in a hole near a shack in the wilderness.” I laughed.

“That’s just where my body lies.” He said. “And my eyesight has recently improved, as has my vantage point.”

I hugged him, as I started to cry.

“You are my good girl. There are none better. Few men deserve you. He might be one.”

I was still crying when I awoke, the room dark but for the night light. The Inn was totally still. I wiped the tears from my face and took a shuddered breath.

“It there anything I can do to help?” Aric asked softly.

“No. It is nothing. I am sorry if I woke you.”

“It is not nothing. Please tell me.” He said.

“I dreamed of Railius.” I said “He visits me in dreams occasionally, still looking after me. He cared for me for two-thirds of my life. I miss him terribly. I was lucky to have him with me.”

He placed his hand on my shoulder, and slowly stroked my arm.

“He was lucky to have you.” he said. “As I am.” 

I rolled onto my side towards him and he was looking back, inches away. We could whisper in the quietest voice and still hear each other clearly. 

“If you continue to look at me in that fashion, sir, and to speak to me in that fashion, I will not be responsible for my actions.” I said.

“It is not only your own actions that should concern you, madam, my actions are also to be considered.” He whispered.

“I dream of your actions, sir. Frequently.” I whispered back.

“You inhabit my dreams as well madam. Frequently. But I do not yet know what is right or appropriate, and I will die before I hurt you.” He replied.

“You could never hurt me.” I said.

“I could hurt you quite badly.” He replied. “But not tonight.”

He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead. I wrapped my arms around him and rested my hear on his shoulder. Our legs found an accommodation, intermingling, my foot massaging his calf.

“I had not noticed you accomplish it, madam, but you appear to have found the time to cut your toenails.” He said

My smile and laughter were muffled by his chest.


	17. The softness of his lips

**27th of First Seed**

“It was not an entirely wasted journey.” Lucia said

“In what respect was this not a wasted journey?” Runa asked. 

Lucia was quiet for moment. “Vilkas gave me a flower.” Lucia said.

I anticipated the quip, and before Runa could strike, I executed my own flanking maneuver “And you had the opportunity to show Farkas Calcelmo’ s book of poems.” I said to Runa

Lucia wasted no time initiating her attack. “What? Do my ears deceive me? You showed Farkas a book of love poems?” She asked with uncontained glee in her voice.

Runa gave me a stare that would make a basilisk envious. “I see your grace is a master of the orthogonal attack as well as the direct assault.” She said. 

“I apologize. I presume too much.” I said

“No, you presume the proper amount. My armor is not so fragile to be pierced by a friendly quip.” She said with a smile.

“Do you believe this to be a wasted journey? Lucia asked.

“Quite the opposite. I find that this journey has healed my spirit more than any spell or potion could have ever healed my body.” I said. “Even a potion of your father’s making.”

Aric smiled. “Then I count this journey a success.” He said as we looked at each other.

Lucia and Runa looked at each other but said nothing. 

* * *

“He was the most condescending egotistical Jarl I have met.” Jordis said. “And I have met several. I could not believe the things he said to you.”

“Worse than what he said to me was his refusal of guards.” Aric said. “We will arrange for them at Whiterun.”

“Honor to you my Thane, but this is not necessary. I am well able to look after myself.” Rigel said.

“I will not risk you on this road in these unsettled times.” He said. “You know enough of events to know the wisdom of my decision.”

“Yes, my Thane.” She said.

“This is no time for ‘Yes, my Thane.’” He said. “Speak your mind in plain terms.”

“Very well. The times have been unsettled since before I was born. They will continue to be so after I am dead. I am no babe that cannot be trusted to travel a road I have traveled many times. But I do wish to be cloistered behind the walls of Markath.” She said.

“I understand, and I appreciate your honesty. But we have stirred a hornet’s nest of immense size, and we do not know yet how many there are, or how angry. They can easily send ten times the number we killed if they are more interested in vengeance than secrecy.” Aric said.

“They cannot field so many in so short a time.” Rigel replied.

“May I ask a question?” I asked.

“You do not require permission to do so.” He said, an edge to his words. “Forgive me. I have not yet recovered my composure after speaking with Jarl Siddgeir. And my mind races with thoughts of what I have unleashed upon Skyrim by disturbing this hornet’s nest. My frustration is entirely with myself. I beg your pardon.” 

“This is not your fault.” I reminded him. “You did not establish clandestine Thalmor outposts in Skyrim or usurp a privately owned gold mine and kill all its occupants.”

“The longer this continues the more I fear the reward will not justify the risk.” He said. “Please, ask your question.”

“My question as a whole is two parts for Rigel, and one part for you.” I said to him.

“Your grace may ask me anything.” Rigel said.

“Rigel, do you wish to return to Markath as soon as possible?”

“No, your grace. I wish to continue to serve and protect my Thane.” She said.

“Are there pressing matters in Markath that require your immediate attention?” I asked

“My sworn duty is to protect my Thane. Nothing else matters.”

“You are also sworn to protect my property.” Aric reminded her.

“Your property was built by the Dwarves out of the living rock and will survive until the sun rises no more. And Morryn is still there. She will deal with any robbers. Their remains will be in the dustbin by the door awaiting your return.”

“Honored Thane, do you wish to send Rigel away?” I asked Aric.

“I wish her to be safe, as I wish for all of you.” He said.

“We do not know what is safe and what is not.” Lucia said. “With very few exceptions we do not know who we can trust. We here, we six, we are a strong group. Very strong. We have demonstrated that. Anyone who opposes us does so at their peril. We are what I trust. But if it becomes necessary, we are still a small enough group that we can disappear into the wilderness. We are well equipped. We know how to survive on only what the Divines provide skilled hunters and foragers. We should remain together. Your grace, what makes you smile so?”

“Forgive me.” I said. “You remind me of your father. You have the wisdom of an Oracle. You have the skill of the warriors from the Epics. You have the bearing of a Monarch. And you are so beautiful. I believe I am beginning to worship a new deity.” I said

There was an awkward silence, until: “If someone does not speak, my sister’s head will explode. Her face is an unhealthy hue.” Runa said.

“Your grace is much too kind.” Was all Lucia said.

“Your grace is not alone in your opinion, and your worship.” Aric said.

“I hope I have not said too much.” I said.

“I may tell Vilkas that he has competition.” Runa said

“I may tell Farkas that you did not survive this journey.” Lucia said to her sister.

“The Divines blessed me with wise women to advise me.” Aric said.

“Speaking of wise women” Lucia said “Is it still your intention to stop at Helgen?

“Yes. Our guest in Whiterun owes us answers, and I wish to be confident that he answers truthfully.” He said.

This was news I had not heard.

“I do not understand.” I said

“Father knows a Truthsayer in Helgen. He will ask her to accompany us to Whiterun to interview our guest.” Lucia said.

“I thought Truthsayers were myth. I have never heard of magic that can compel the truth from someone.” I said.

“It is not magic, at least not in the sense that men know it. Not spells, or scrolls. It is an innate ability. She prefers the term ‘Wise Woman’.” Aric said

This sounds too much like Aric to be a coincidence.

“An innate ability like being Dragonborn?” I asked

“I suppose.” He said. “I had never thought of it that way.”

To us she has always been simply Ninoshenh Tayen.” Lucia said.

“That is an unusual name.” I said

“Her name is Tayen Tiva.” Runa said “It means New Moon Dance. Her mother named her when she was three when saw her dancing during the festival of the new moon. Until then she was just called ‘little girl’. Ninoshenh means ‘Aunt’.”

“She has given all of us spirit names.” Lucia said. “They are the only names she ever uses with us.”

“Really?” I asked. “What name did she give you?” I asked her.

“Tayen named her ‘Orenda’.” Aric said. “It means ‘Magic Power’.”

“She named papa ‘Ahanu’. Runa said. “It means ‘He laughs.’”

“She named Runa ‘Catori’, which means ‘spirit’.” Lucia said.

“She has a gift for names.” I said. “They are all unerringly on target.”

“She has many gifts. We saw her briefly when we last stopped at Helgen.” Aric said.

“Your family friend.” I said.

“The gift of choosing real estate seems to have eluded her, however. Helgen would not be my first choice of homes.” Runa said.

“I thought it an odd location for a Wise Woman as well.” I said

“It is her home for the moment.” Aric said “She does not like cities, preferring a closer attachment to nature. But towns and villages occasionally employ her to perform rituals so that the village may prosper. That is why she is in Helgen.”

* * *

We stopped by a small stand of trees that afforded shade and privacy for an accommodation. The weather had grown warmer and the shade was welcome.

“How much confidence do you have in Tayen’s ability?” I asked Aric. 

“I have complete confidence in her.” He answered

So, you will ask a question, he will answer, and she will say whether what he speaks is truth or no?” I asked

“It will not be only his words she judges.” He said.

“What then?” I asked

“’Truth and purity are a perfect melody’ she said once.” Lucia said. “’As truth becomes falsehood and purity is corrupted false notes become evident. An innocent soul is like a morning mist. The sun rises and its rays penetrate without effort. There is no obstruction. Not so with a guilty soul. A hardness develops, blocking the light.’”

“Many guilty cannot withstand her gaze and break down, cascading through memories of past wrongdoing, admitting their guilt.” Aric said. “But she does not need their admission. She will know.”

I did not know how to respond to that.

“I cannot decide whether that is a gift or a curse.” I said.

“It is partly why she avoids cities and large groups of people. She is very private and would never pry; but sometimes it becomes too much.” Aric said.

“And she truly loves nature and being within it.” Runa said.

“The tongues of men are filled with deceits.” I said. “If you continue to look so astonished, I will take offense. I have been known to read a poem or two.” I said to more than one set of raised eyebrows.

“I have never doubted that you are acquainted with poetry, madam. And certainly, music; because your words are poetry, and your voice music.” Aric replied.

My face must have been bright red as I said, “Now who quotes poetry sir?”

“Blessed Divines, are there no men left who do not recite poetry and look greenly at the sight of a beautiful face?” Runa asked. 

“Like Farkas, you mean?” Lucia asked

“Yes, since you mention his name; like Farkas.” She replied. “He speaks plainly. It takes no time to translate his words to determine whether it was a compliment. There are not enough such men in Whiterun.”

“Enough for the whole city, sister, or enough for you?” Lucia asked with a look of unbridled happiness.

“I shall owe you and answer for that.” Runa said before picking up a branch of suitable length. “Have at you!”

Lucia found a branch to her liking and the wooden battle was engaged. It quickly became obvious, however, that this was an old dance for the sisters. Each was well acquainted with the other, and no advantage was to be had. 

“I would that all battles had this amount of laughter.” Aric said as he observed his daughters in their dance, well-rehearsed steps that he no doubt taught them himself. “And this amount of injury.”

Just then a new level in the mayhem was announced by a call to arms as the two housecarls entered the fray. What started as individual combat became a battle royal, housecarls against sisters. I could barely breath from laughing, and Aric was no better off as he would attempt to speak “Runa, a flanking maneuver from the northeast!” It was not possible that anyone could hear his words, all four women laughing and shouting their own tactics. 

I did not think I could laugh harder until I glanced behind us to see all our horses giving the mock battle their undivided attention. Aric turned to see the reason for my now total collapse and then simply fell to one side as he gasped to recover his own breath. 

We all lay on the grass later, each of us catching our breath. There was not a part of my face or my abdomen that did not hurt from laughing.

“I think I may have pulled a muscle in stomach.” I said, looking up at the sky through the trees, when I was finally able to speak again.

“We have not jousted in some time.” Lucia said. “I miss it.”

“As do I.” Runa said, as she looked at her sister.

“You are such skilled warriors.” I said, “have you never considered joining the Companions?” I asked.

It was clear by the looks on the faces of Aric and his daughters that I had stumbled into something. “I apologize. I meant no disrespect.” I said.

“No disrespect is taken.” Runa said. “You remind us of an incident with the Companions when Lucia and I were younger.”

“An incident? With the Companions?” I asked.

“In a manner of speaking.” Aric replied.

“I have only just recovered from my last bout of laughter. Another such bout will surely be my end.” I said

“Your life is safe.” Lucia said. “It is not a humorous event.”

“It has humorous elements.” Runa said.

“True.” Lucia said.

“It was several years ago, I had cause to visit the Companions and Lucia and Runa were with me. Some of the Companions have known them all their lives, but not all.” Aric said. “The more recent members come from elsewhere, and the most recent member, not counting me, did not know them at all. They were all in the courtyard while I talked to Kodlack. Ria, the newest but one, saw Runa, still a teenager, in her expensive armor, with her expensive sword and thought she would have some fun.” I will let the eyewitnesses describe the events.

“Ria had been training with another Companion.” Lucia said. “She stopped and approached Runa and said ‘That sword is too heavy for a child your size. I doubt you can hold it properly.”

“She did not say it in a nice manner.” Runa said. “So, I responded ‘I hold it in whatever manner I wish. It responds to my arm, and my intent. The combination has never failed me.”

“It took Ria a moment to decipher that answer.” Lucia said. 

“We had been talking with Vilkas and Farkas when she approached me. Other companions were in the courtyard closer to Ria. We were now in two groups of four.” Runa said.

“’Please demonstrate this masterful combination. We are all warriors here.’ She said” Lucia recounted.

“She did not say ‘warriors’ in a nice manner either.” Runa said.

“Ria drew her sword as the other Companions cleared a space.” Lucia said. “Vilkas and Farkas huddled close to us.” 

“‘ _Remember, she is young, and this is practice_ ’ Vilkas said.” 

“‘ _Don’t kill her_ ’ Farkas said.”

“I drew my sword and stepped forward. She took a two handed angled guarded stance. I was about to take my own stance when she smiled at me, almost a sneer.” Runa said

“After that it escalated quickly.” Lucia said. “Runa cast a spell with her left hand and a flock of birds flew at Ria’s face, followed immediately by Runa’s attack. Ria was on the defensive for the remainder of the bout. It ended with Ria on the ground defenseless.”

“She gave me a look that said all. I turned and started walking back to Lucia when I heard her get up and charge me from behind.” Runa said.

“It was a cowardly thing to do.” Lucia said, “My father says members have been dismissed for less.”

“There was no thought in what I did next.” Runa said “It was right after a series of Dwemer ruins. My body and mind were still primed for battle. I cast a flame cloak as I leapt half the distance between us. I would have killed her but for another Companion intervening.”

“That was when it almost became serious.” Lucia said. “The other companions drew to protect Ria. Farkas and Vilkas drew to protect us. I had a spell in each hand and would have brought the sky down upon anyone who threatened Runa.”

“It was four against four.” Runa said. “I was shrouded in flames in the center. Everyone else was keeping their distance, but I could see the look on their faces. ‘ _What have we let into our courtyard?_ ’ they were thinking.”

“Not all of them.” Lucia said. “Farkas was behind you. You did not see his face, but I did. His face shone like the sun. He was so proud of you I thought he would burst.”

“He almost lost his home because of me.” Runa said.

“We two stopped being girls to them that day, even the ones who had known us all our lives.” Lucia said.

“That is the sight that greeted Kodlack and me as we walked out into the courtyard.” Aric said.

“They are all warriors of renown, and they are all certainly brave; but they had no idea in how deadly a school we have been trained. Even Farkas and Vilkas, with whom we had played and later practiced, most of our lives did not know the extent of our training, or our level of skill.” Lucia said.

“We all agreed that it was a misunderstanding. Otherwise Ria, Vilkas and Farkas would have been dismissed.” Aric said.

“It is another thing that binds the four of us.” Runa said. “For most of our lives it was like we were brothers and sisters. These past several years have been different.”

“But the rest of the Companions have never warmed to us.” Lucia said. “Not even to my father, who is one of them.”

“Well, I have not warmed to any of the other Companions, so we are even.” Runa said.

“That they never invited me to join is understandable. They have no mages in their ranks. But that they never invited Runa to join I take as a personal slight.” Lucia said. “Few of them could have stood against her even then. She would be Harbinger eventually if she had joined.”

“It was right that they did not invite me.” Runa said. “I would never have fit in. I am too much like Uthgerd, I reacted out or all proportion that day.”

“You were still quite young, and you regained your composure quickly.” Aric said, “It was many years ago. And they are not the only warriors of renown in Whiterun now. You have earned their respect. Kodlack will tell you that himself.”

“Where are the humorous elements in this story?” I asked.

Runa and Lucia immediately began to laugh again. “You should have seen the look on his face!” Runa said as she pointed to her father, and as Lucia did her best to reproduce her father’s look.

I have definitely pulled a muscle in my stomach.

* * *

“What are you thinking?” I asked him. “You are more quiet than usual.”

We were all surprised to find that the Inn in Helgen was not only rebuilt but open for business. Business that they were very happy to have. Helgen was much farther along in its repair that I had expected. The horses were happy for the comfort of the Stable. We were happy for the comfort of the Inn. A newly rebuilt Inn with new furniture and new rooms and new larger beds.

“I was thinking that it is the people who love us that we remember forever, the people who hurt us fade in our minds to shadows.”

We arrived in Helgen late, and it was later still before we all settled in our beds. Aric had that fragile look that I had come to recognize. I did not know the cause or the cure, but I began to discern a pattern to these episodes. So, his answer was not a complete surprise.

“When Lucia and Runa would remember that incident in the year after it occurred it was always with anger at Ria. Now they remember Vilkas and Farkas drawing against their sworn brothers and sisters, risking the only home they had known since Jergen rescued them, their positions as Companions, out of love for them, with no promise of anything in return. Their relationship had already begun to change by then I suspect, but I believe this was when the four of them realized that their brother-sister relationship had changed into something else.”

“Relationships have a tendency to do that, given time and proximity.” I said. But I could not leave the question unasked any longer. “Please tell me what troubles you.”

“Nothing.” He said as he looked at me, “Really. A slight melancholy.”

“This is not the first that I have observed.” I said. “And your daughters seem to be at their center.”

“All my children are at its center.” He said. He looked at me again and brushed my face with his hand. His eyes sparkled, and I thought for a moment that he would kiss me, and that our relationship would also undergo a significant change. But his hand left my face.

“I was not a very good Father to my children in the early days.” He said. “I was away from them for periods of time that were much too long. It is impossible to be a good parent at such a distance as I was from them. Proximity is critical to those relationships like any other. All my children who came to live in Whiterun after they were adopted are more Lydia’s children than they are mine. And Danica’s. 

There were months that I was away and it was Lydia who raised them, and Danica who visited them each day, each of them taking turns on her knee, talking about what Lydia taught them, or where she took them, or their plans for the next day. Lydia will say she was happy to do it, but really, I imposed on her terribly. Her oath was not to be a surrogate mother to my children. She said once ‘My oath is to protect you and keep you safe. I do that by easing your burden. I know you think of them when you are away. This way, you know they are safe, and looked after, and loved. And that knowledge eases your mind so you can focus on the task at hand.’ We were in Whiterun for so short a time that you did not have the opportunity to know her.”

“I am sorry that I did not have the opportunity to know her better.” I said.

“She is as much a part of my family as any of my daughters.” He said. “Part Mother, part Sister to my first six children. I realized after returning from one adventure that it was Lydia they turned to when they needed comfort, of to share their happiness. They did not know me, and I did not know them. I did not leave again for eight months. Anyone who saw us then could be forgiven for thinking us a family, like any other: A Father and Mother, carrying their children or holding their hands as they navigated the rocks in a stream. My trips after that were much shorter. The interludes at home grew longer until, at some point I cannot identify clearly, it was the trips away that were the interludes, and the time at home that became my life. That was when I truly understood what it means to love my children, and how that love can seep into every crack and nook of my life. I had never understood how much of my thoughts could be consumed by my children. I look at them now, and I think ‘I love you. I may have made a terrible mistake. What is it I am leading you into?’ That is what bothers me. I have a sinking feeling that I am leading my children into great danger.”

He was one of the most powerful individuals I had ever met, or even heard of. The things I saw him accomplish with my own eyes would give me nightmares if I did not know the heart that beats within him. How then could I look at him and think _he is as fragile as an egg._ I did not think my heart could ache so much for another person. _It will shatter into pieces if I do not break this spell._ I thought. _Both our hearts will._

“The world is dangerous. Ignorance of that danger is no protection. There is certainly a danger here. We do not know how great. Until we know more, everyone’s children are in danger.” I said. “You know this already.”

“I do.” He said. “But it is my family at the fore in this battle. This was never the life I sought. Not for myself and not for them. I only wanted a land at peace and the means to raise my family. I land free of dragon attacks and vampire attacks. Why then is this life thrust upon me?”

“Because you care for others, and because you are alive, and brave, and powerful all at the same time.” I answered. “The Gods choose whom they guide and whom they lead astray, and I do not believe you have strayed from the true path. We are all on a journey. Life is a journey. Dare we quibble about how the journey begins, or the path we take if we reach our desired destination?”

“My journey began badly and may yet end so. I do not have the sight to see that far.” He said.

“You said yourself you cannot yet see the end.” I reminded him. “And if we are on the subject of beginnings, I will tell you that I spent the beginning of this journey planning your death. That I would fall in love with you was still too far distant for me to see. Yet here I am. I do not wish to be elsewhere. It would insult the Gods, therefore, if I quibbled about how the journey began.” I said.

“Given your description of it, I believe it would be my place to quibble about it.” He said, his smile finally appearing.

“You lighten my heart with your smile.” I said softly.

“I am afraid I will be the death of thee.” He said in barely a whisper.

“I have it on good authority that I am tougher than I look.” I whispered back.

“You look as delicate as a rose, yet I have seen your metal firsthand.” He said. “You are a beautiful flower, which conceals a deadly thorn.”

“You will forgive me, sir, if I take a moment to decipher that statement before saying ‘thank you’” I replied.

“I will lead you to the quicker path and say, “You are beautiful constantly, and deadly only occasionally.” He said

“Now I shall require a moment to decide which of those declarations I prefer more.” I laughed.

“It is late, and there is no rush for you to decide.” He said as he laced my hand into his. “You may sleep on it and let me know your decision in the morning.” It was then, finally, that I felt the softness of his lips upon mine.

* * *

“So, that happened.” Railius said.

“Do not make more of it than it was.” I said. “It was a kiss.”

“It was more than one.” He said. “I never needed two hands to count to one before.”

“It was one kiss, with intervals to allow for breathing.” I said, my attempt at logic spoiled by my rising voice.

“That was smart, given how much breathing you required.” He said.

“I would have required twenty times that amount if the choice had been mine. If I had been sure. If he had given me a sign.” I said.

“The sign was there, lass, if you failed to notice.” He said.

“You are a wicked man!” I laughed “To speak to your daughter in such a fashion!”

“You’re a grown woman.” He said. “You have seen a sign or two in your lifetime already.”

“I see death has not improved your sense of decorum.” I replied.

“And how do you feel now, lass?” he asked me

“I feel like singing.” I said. 

“If you start singing now you will wake him.” He said

“Then I will sing in my dream. The only one it will disturb will be you.” I said.

“Your singing never disturbed me. Your voice is music.” He said

“You are very sweet. You sound just like him.” I said.

“That is the nicest thing you could have said about him.” He said dryly.

“Must you talk while I am singing?” I laughed.


	18. Dragons and Saber Cats

**28th of First Seed**

“You were singing while you slept.” Aric said, “Did you know?”

We had not yet risen, taking advantage of the extra hour of privacy for comfort, and closeness. I had wrapped my arms around him, my chest pressed against his back, as my hands reached under his shirt to acquaint themselves with his chest. He placed on hand on top of mine and used it to guide my hand in its quest, lingering over old scars or rough patches of skin. He breathed in deeply and as he exhaled it seemed that he expelled all his tension. His body relaxed completely against mine. I am sure he could feel the smile on my face as I found the exposed skin of his shoulder with my lips.

“Really?” I asked, feigning ignorance, my lips still pressed against his skin. “I wonder what that could have been?”

“I believe it was _The Boy at the Fair_.” He said.

“perhaps you dreamt it.” I suggested.

He rolled over towards me and his hands found my back under my shift and my own hands returned the favor.

“Perhaps.” He whispered, as he pressed his lips to mine. His fingernails running over my bare flesh.

“Who is the saber cat now sir?” I asked him as my breath quickened and my skin came alive to his touch.

“you forget madam.” He said as his lips trace the line of my jaw to my neck. “that dragons also have claws.”

* * *

But dragons and saber cats must eventually emerge from their warm nest, especially when four women were awaiting their arrival.

“If you had risen on time you would have had excellent warm bread with butter.” Runa said. “You will have to console yourselves with chicken and potatoes until the next loves arrive.”

“They serve an excellent breakfast.” Rigel said.

“I have found Helgen’s hospitality to be uneven at times.” Aric said. “They have certainly progressed in their rebuilding.” They will expand outside the north wall I am told.”

“This came for you while the two of you were whispering and laughing and being general layabouts.” Lucia said, smiling at me, and handing a folded note to Aric.

He read it as he licked grease from his fingers. “Well” he said looking at me “It appears that the two birds we released have landed here.”

“The only birds to make your recent acquaintance that I am aware of sit on that plate in front of you.” I said.

“The two bandits.” He said.

It took me a moment. “They ran here?” I asked.

“It would seem that we and they chose the same destination.” He said. “They are held in the fort. The officer in charge requests my council.” 

“That can surely wait until after breakfast.” I said just as fresh bread arrived.

He viewed the repast set between us all as he answered. “Yes. I do not believe they are going anywhere.”

* * *

“Have they seen the wise woman?” he asked the Sergeant of the guard.

“No, your grace.” The man answered shyly, 

“You took their statement, you doubted their account, and yet you did not call the truthsayer?” Aric asked him.

“We dared not.” The man said, looking at his boots.

It was no mystery why. At the word ‘truthsayer’ every man in hearing distance adopted the same look.

“Courage man. What propels you to this loss of complexion? She will not steal your soul or your thoughts.” He said to everyone present.

“Everyone has secrets he wishes to keep hidden milord.” The man said. “none of us dare risk a stray thought in her presence.”

“Come now, sir, this is beyond reason. You are an officer of the imperial guard. You have confronted much worse than one woman, and a beautiful woman at that.”

“She is very pleasant on the eye sir, no mistake; but from a safe distance.”

“You will send a man to inform her she is requested by the Thane of Whiterun to interview two men.” He said. “If that man cannot go to such a doom unconfessed, he may confess to the Reverend Mother beforehand.”

“If someone must go, milord, then it must be me.” The sergeant said.

“Well stated sergeant.” Aric replied.

“Shall I take your confession good sergeant?” I asked him

He began to cry. “Reverend Mother I am too ashamed to begin.” He said.

“Come sir” I said. “Dry your eyes and let us find a private place. Do not fret. My father was a sergeant of the imperial guard. You remind me of him, so I will not be shocked by anything you say.”

* * *

“He is an honest solider with an honest soldier’s sins.” I said to Aric quietly afterwards. “You two would understand each other.”

“Would we?” he asked me, is skepticism plain.

“You both wish for quiet lives, though you both walk paths that are not quiet. You both care for your families and are concerned that you fail. And, you may find it interesting to know, he also writes poetry.” I said.

“Your list of talents grows longer than my arm madam.” He said.

“The list would be longer still, sir, if we had stayed abed longer.” I said

His eyes shined at me “My imagination runs rampant madam.”

The sergeant returned in the company of a woman who was unlike any I had ever seen. Tall, with supple skin the color of mahogany. Raven hair, straight, luxurious, flowing down her back, reaching past her waist. Her quite excellent figure on display where it was not covered by furs.

“Ahanu.” She said as she embraced Aric, pressing her cheek against his. She had to look up at him, but not much. “You look well.”  
  


“As do you, Awena.” He said.

“Awena?” I asked him. It was not what I expected.

“Ahanu believes that the giving of spirit names is not solely my providence.” She said.

“It means ‘Sunrise’” he said. “she would wake me and say ‘Sunrise approaches, Ahanu. You will miss it if you indulge your habit of oversleeping.”

“A habit I do not believe you have broken.” She said as she looked at each of us in turn.

 _Gods, the sergeant was correct. She knows._ I thought

“Awena, may I present Reverend Mother Noxaura.”

“Divines guard you and keep you safe, madam.” I said. What title does one use with a Truthsayer?

“May the Great Spirit, whose voice we hear in the winds, and whose breath gives life to all the world, grant you health, and long-life Reverend Mother.” She answered.

“What a beautiful prayer, invoked by such a beautiful Priestess.” I said. “I must spoil it by asking what I may call you?”

Her laugh was a beautiful as the rest of her. “You may call me as the Spirit guides you. The name my mother gave me is Tayen.” She said.

“Sergeant, left us see if these two recent additions to your flock are the birds we set free some days ago.” Aric said to the sergeant.

They were indeed the two men Aric had let go from the ruined tower. A bit worse for wear, even more starved than when we first met them, but just as afraid. 

“Who did they surrender to?” Aric asked the sergeant.

“It were the nigh watch on the main road sir.” The sergeant answered. “They come out of the wood, begging for food, which we gave them.”

“Were they armed?” Aric asked him.

“No sir. Naught but a skinning knife. Nothing to threaten armed men.” the sergeant answered.

“Who beat them?” Aric asked.

“No one sir. They was like that when we found them.” the sergeant replied.

“Do you swear so, sir? Or must I call the entire guard and put them before the wise woman?” Aric asked him.

“I swear it milord.” the sergeant said “We have some hard cases, but everyone here knows the wise woman sees all. Plus, them bruises are days old, begging your pardon milord.”

“Thank you, sergeant. You and your men may go back to your duties.” Aric told him.

I looked at our two captives. The fear was plain on both their faces.

“They are terrified.” I said to him. “May I speak to them first?” I asked.

“Of course.” He said. Then to the prisoners “The Reverend Mother will speak to you.”

“Young sirs, please step closer to the bars and into the light.” I said to them gently.

The one who moved first looked like the first one in the tower to run for his life. The second followed him into the light. Older brother and younger? Relations of some sort? Friends? It seemed the second was accustomed to deferring to the first.

And they had certainly been beaten, but the sergeant was correct, their wounds and bruises were several days old.

“My name is Noxaura. Please tell me your names.” I said.

“Lucien your grace.” said the first

“Adrian your grace.” said the second

Imperials, both.

“Lucien, Adrian, I believe you are both very far from home.” I said

“Yes, your grace.” Lucien said. “We ain’t really sure where we are.”

“Where are you from?” I asked them.

“Chorrol, your grace.” Lucian answered.

“You have certainly traveled far. How did you come to be here?” I asked

“We walked, your grace.” Adrian replied.

I did not repress my smile in time. “I apologize. My question was not clear. How is it you came to be in the company of bandits lying in wait for honest travelers?”

“Nels and his gang, your grace. They come to our village. They take whatever they want. Sometimes supplies, sometimes girls, sometimes boys. This time they took us.”

“They took you and forced you to serve with them? As bandits?” I asked

“Yes, your grace.” Lucian said as Adrian started to cry.

“We didn’t want to.” Adrian said “Neither me nor Lucian ever trained to fight. We’re too young.”

“How old are you?” I asked.

“Sixteen.” Lucian said

“Fifteen.” Adrian said.

“Are you brothers?” I asked. They looked like they were kin.

“He’s my cousin.” Adrian said, nodding to Lucian.

“Who beat you?” I asked

“Nels, your Grace.” Lucian said

“Why.” I asked

“For anything. Not knowing how to hold a sword. Not knowing how to cook. But this last beating was for hanging back and not wanting to fight.” Lucian said

“You told him you did not want to fight?” I asked

“I told him I don’t care how much gold is in it, I wouldn’t do it.”

“I told him I just wanted to go home.” Adrian said.

“Gold?” Aric asked as he stepped forward. The boys stepped back before they knew what they were doing.

“Step forward lads.” Aric said. “I apologize for frightening you earlier. I did it to save your lives. Step forward.”

They stepped forward, Lucian and then Adrian.

“You mentioned Gold. Gold coins, or gold jewelry taken from those you robbed?” Aric asked them.

“Gold sir. Coins sir. Bags of coins sir.” Lucian said

“From that Jarl sir.” Adrian said

“Jarl?” Aric asked, “what Jarl?”

“The Jarl in that big city sir. The one by the tower sir. Where you found us sir.”

“Jarl Siddgeir?” he asked.

“That’s the name sir. Nels brings him loot, he gives Nels gold. Until lately. Nels told the Jarl that he don’t work for the Jarl anymore.” Lucian said.

“On the road that day, was Nels with the men hiding in the trees?” Aric asked.

“Yes sir. Everyone was there sir.” Lucian said.

“Reverend Mother, do you have more questions for them?” Aric asked me.

“Did any of the guards here abuse you?” I asked

“Abuse your grace?” Lucian asked

“Did they beat you?” I asked

“No, your grace. They gave us food.” Lucian said

“Not much food.” Adrian added.

My smile was again on the verge of escaping. 

“You have both been very patient, and very brave. Please be patient a short while longer.” I said before rejoining Aric and Tayen.

“I have a request to make, but perhaps I should wait until Tayen has concluded her interview.” I said.

Tayen smiled. “I concluded that some time ago.” She said.

“You do not wish to question them?” I asked

“I know all there is to know about them that is of any importance.” She said. “They are like a morning mist. It takes little effort to see through them. There is no hardness in them. They are innocents. But they do not sleep well. What they have seen haunts them. They carry more guilt than they deserve.”

“We know now very well where the guilt truly lies.” I said.

“He will answer for it.” Was all Aric said, but I could see his face. It was a different sort of mask. I did not envy Jarl Siddgeir.

“This is work for me now.” I said, “Please leave me with them.”

“As you wish.” Aric said. “we will be right outside if you need us.”

“Thank you.” I said.

“Lucian. Adrian. The Truthsayer has heard your testimony and finds you blameless.” I said. “The guilt that you carry is not yours to bear. It belongs to another. We will kneel together and pray, and then I will hear your confessions, and the Divines will wash away your sins, and you will be as newborn babes. Sinless, guiltless. Therefore, let us pray together…”

* * *

“They are confessed, and the Divines have absolved them of their sins. It seems to have lightened their hearts. Not that they had many sins needing absolution. We all know now where the greater sin lies.” I said.

“I have sent for the Captain, your grace” the sergeant said. “Jarl Balgruuf will have a full report of the situation in Falkreath. There will be a reckoning.”

“My reckoning may not wait that amount of time.” Aric said

“I beg the honored Thane to be patient, and to grant a request.” I said

“Anything. Your grace has but to ask.” He said

“I ask that the boys be moved from that cell immediately. That they be bathed thoroughly in hot water. That their hurt be looked to. That they receive clean clothes. That they be fed. They would also benefit from your small blue healing potion at bedtime. They should do well enough until they can be returned home. Perhaps they could earn their keep here helping with the rebuilding?” It was much to ask, but it was fair, and right.

“By my right as Thane of Whiterun it is so ordered. Sergeant, open the cell and bring them out.” He said

“At once milord.” The sergeant said before he went back into the prison. 

“Do you know, I am not entirely sure I have the authority to grant absolution in the name of the Divines?” I whispered

“Do you know, I am not entirely sure I have the authority to grant their release?” Aric whispered in replied.

“Do you know, I can hear every word you are saying?” Tayen whispered to both of us.

Our laughter greeted the sergeant and the freed boys. Their faces seemed to lighted at the sound.

“You are both free.” Aric told them. “You will be looked after here until we can return you to your families. Given your ages we will find someone who will serve as custodian and be responsible for you.”

“I may be of use in that task.” Tayen said.

I explained the arrangements as we walked to the keep door and then into the sunlight, but I am not sure how much they heard. Tayen was a stunning figure in her scant furs, and these boys were younger than Samuel, with even less experience with women. _This is how deities are born._ I thought. _They will be worshiping her in no time at all._

* * *

“They can be forgiven for their reaction.” Aric said. “She is a striking figure in her own right. That they see her as their liberator adds to the legend that they will no doubt tell their children.”

“It was kind of her to take them in hand.” I said, “We will not recognize them in a month if we return, after a few good meals and maternal care have restored their health. They will be completely under her spell by then.”

“If her daughter were to visit in that time, I fear they will choose to never go home again.” Aric said.

“I will attempt to look surprised that she has a beautiful daughter.” I said with a laugh. “I have never met a woman like her. She is a rare beauty indeed.”

“One of her toes contains more wisdom that I can claim in my entire body. I have spoken about how much I owe to Hamal, but Tayen and Danica played important roles as well. But for those three I would have died long ago, a green sapling that could not gain the wisdom to mature.” He said. “Tayen and Runa are of a kind in some ways. She can also be direct. She said to me once, many years ago: ‘You cannot see past yourself. The Sun does not rise solely to shine upon you. The moon knows nothing of your existence. Life will teach you these lessons. I pray to the Great Spirit that it does not kill you in the process.’”.

“Wisdom indeed.” I said. “We would all benefit from such a teacher in our youth.”

Tayen agreed to meet us in Whiterun before the Day of The Dead festival. 

“I will visit the Shine of the Ancients on that day. The barrow of my own ancestors is too far.” She said. “I will dance the Nanissáanah with the spirits of my mother and father, And with Mato. Then we will welcome all the dead of the world to join us.” She said.

“We will look for you before then.” Aric said.

* * *

Two freshly washed and cleanly clothed boys were listening intently as the blacksmith showed them the forge and the tools he used to ply his trade. A woman who could only be his wife stood nearby looking like they had just discovered treasure.

“They never had children of their own, no matter how much they prayed for them.” The captain said. “Those boys are a blessing to them.”

“The boys are only on loan. They know that, do they not?” Aric asked.

“yes, milord.” He replied.

“Look at her face, Aric.” I said. “Can one face contain so much happiness without cracking?”

“We have an infinite capacity for happiness.” He answered. “The Divines were wise when they insured that.”

“You would lecture a Priestess of the Divines, sir?” I asked him playfully.

“Never madam.” He answered. “But it is necessary to remind myself from time to time.”

“I see the way you look at your children.” I said. “You need no reminding of your capacity for happiness”

“I seem to run more to melancholy lately.” He said.

“Brief interludes only. You always return to your natural state.” I said. Placing my hand on his arm.

“You will excuse me, milord, I have duties to attend.” Said the Captain before departing quickly.

“I have an overabundance of reason for happiness.” He said as he looked at me.

* * *

An early Luncheon and then our journey continued.

“They have made excellent progress.” Lucia said.

“It barely resembles Helgen as I first saw it.” Aric said.

“When was that?” I asked.

“Some time ago.” He said.

“Before the dragon attack or after?” I asked.

He did not speak immediately. He adopted that unfocused look that I knew meant he was deep in thought.

“During.” He said.

It seemed as if our entire group stopped on command.

“What?” Runa asked.

“I was last present during the attack.” Aric said. “As was Ulfric. This is where he and I met.” He said

“WHAT?!” Lucia and Jordis said in unison.

“You and Ulfric Stormcloak were both in Helgen during the attack?” I asked, “For what reason?”

Again, he paused. “We were awaiting execution.”

“WHAT?!” we all said together.

“This is a story for another time.” He said. “Let us continue.”

“You cannot leave this story half told.” Runa said. “Not as you left it.”

“If it were only half told I would tell the rest.” He said. “There is too much yet to tell, and the middle of the road is no place to tell it.”

“Father.” Lucia said.

“I promise a full recounting tonight, once we are bathed and rested and fed. The Jarl’s hunting lodge has an excellent location for stories such as this.

* * *

And so, bathed, rested, and fed, accompanied by the sound of a waterfall beneath our feet, and a porch roof above our heads, Aric delivered the promised remainder of his story.

“I will not be at all surprised if a serious accident befell Legate Rikke.” Jordis said. “Given her unhealthy disposition she is unlikely to survive it.”

“I know you only jest.” Aric said. “Otherwise I would outright forbid you from even thinking of it.”

“You may order my joints, honored Thane, but my thoughts are my own.” She replied.

“In that case, it is your joints that I speak to.” He said. “It was long ago. I have had more than enough time for vengeance if that is what I wanted. I chose otherwise, and no one here has the right to place their judgement over mine in this. Leave her be, all of you.”

Two ‘Yes, father.’ And two ‘Yes, Thane” answered him.

Aric looked at me.

“Do you look at me, sir, to suggest that a High Priestess in Holy Orders would plot and execute revenge?” I asked in my most royal voice.

“I would never do so, your grace, the possibility being unknown throughout history.” He replied in his driest voice.

“I would take offense, sir, if my mood had not been improved by this excellent retreat with its excellent bath.” I said

“I share the Reverend Mother’s sentiment.” Rigel said. “It is an exquisite lodge.”

“I may take your advice and purchase it from the Jarl.” I said to Aric.

“Are you serious?” Lucia asked.

“I may be.” I said. “But my thoughts of late have tended towards home. The home of my youth. It may be that it has grown too foreign for me, or me for it. I do not think it is possible to return to the home of one’s youth.”

“I did, with much success.” Lucia said.

“True.” I replied. “A journey south may be in order, to reconnoiter. As Your father reminds me: ‘there is no rush’.”

“How far south?” Runa asked

“The Nibenay Valley, near Lake Rumare.” I answered, which drew Aric’s attention.

“That far?” Lucia asked

“It is not so far.” I answered. “Not across the sea to the lands of the frozen north.” I said.

Aric looked at me and smiled. “Not quite so far as that, no.”

“Yet still too far to let you travel alone.” Lucia said. “You will need an escort.”

“Truthfully.” Rigel said. “You are too important a person to be allowed to wander about on your own.”

“I have always wanted to visit Cyrodiil.” Runa said.

“Am I to be abandoned in such a cavalier fashion?” Jordis asked.

“Peace, everyone, you disturb the calm.” Aric laughed.

“Such a journey, if undertaken at all, is too distant in the future to see yet.” I said. “However, I give you all my solemn promise that I will not undertake such a journey without my present company, for whom I have developed much affection.”

“as duties permit.” Aric said

“A warrior’s promise then.” Jordis said and stood and extended her hand.

“I am no warrior, lady.” I said.

“You forget, your grace, I saw you on the road.” She reminded me, as her hand stayed outstretched.

“Very well. A warrior’s promise.” I said as I stood and extended my own hand, accepting her clasp, warrior fashion. Soon it was clasping all around.

“I am lost for words, except to say that I am deeply moved. Thank you all.” If I attempted more, I would surely cry.

“Well, since that is settled, I am off to bed.” Lucia said.

* * *

“We will soon have one less mystery to investigate.” Aric said as we lay in bed.

“True.” I answered. “Though I admit that I am not sure I am prepared to hear the reason behind this extended attempt on my life.”

“I understand.” He said. He rolled to his side, so we were facing each other. “But surely it is better to know than to not.”

“Yes.” I said “But up until now it has been just a question in my mind: what did I do that someone felt they were justified taking this action? It took little effort to convince myself that I am blameless. I will have nowhere to hide once the reason is plainly stated. What if it was justified?”

“The answer to that question also requires little effort.” He said as he slowly massaged my shoulder. “You did nothing to warrant it. What could you have done that would rise to that level? Did you hire a band of brigands to prey upon the innocent like the Jarl of Falkreath? Did you trick a woman to undergo a ritual against her will? Did you do as this man we shall soon meet did and hire assassins? You know me well enough now to know that I have more than a passing acquaintance with guilt, and I tell you that you are blameless in this. And I believe I know you well enough to know the heart that beats in that attractive chest. You have a good heart. I will not say a pure heart since purity is not always desirable in a frame as attractive as yours.”

I placed my hand on his face for a moment before removing it, needing both my hands to pull my shift over my head and drop it onto the floor.

“Madam” he said with a smile, his voice soft. “I believe you have misplaced an article of clothing.”

“Nothing is misplaced sir.” I said softly in return as I entwined my body with his and allowed my hands to explore him. “I know where everything is.”


	19. Mother to this pack of ravenous wolves

**29th of First Seed**

“Surely, this house was never so small when we were growing up.” Sophie said as the four sisters embraced.

“It is exactly the same dimensions now as it was then.” Aric said as he kissed his twin daughters in turn. “It is the four of you who have grown.”

* * *

I had not spelt so well in some time, a deep, restorative sleep broken only once in the early morning as we continued our exploration of each other, our hands and lips learning each other’s outlines, and textures, and rhythms; two bodies becoming one, breath quickening, hearts racing in unison. I had thought afterwards, in the warm nest we shared, of making a lighthearted quip relating to the Champion of Dibella, but I was not sure how he would receive it. “How many women have made the same quip with him after experiencing his most excellent talents?” I wondered. In the end, discretion won out, and I held my tongue, let my head relax on his shoulder, and drifted off to sleep again.

It seemed on the sort journey to Whiterun later in the morning that the silence between us had changed. No longer the comfortable silence of friendship, but now the comfortable silence of lovers; each glance accompanied by a smile; a reminder of what we had shared.

“Has there ever been a more beautiful morning?” I asked after we had been on the road for some time. “Have the colors been this bright? Has the air been this sweet?”

“It is certainly an exceptional morning.” Aric said.

“Some of us find the air sweeter than others.” Runa said playfully.

“Father, what is the Spirit Name for ‘Dark Cloud’?” Lucia asked. I believe that Tayen may have erred when naming Runa.

* * *

“I feel as if my heart will burst from joy.” Lydia said, “It has been too long since we have been under one roof. I am fortunate that one cannot die from over smiling.”

“I would be long dead if that affliction proved fatal, good Lady.” I said. “Too often your daughters reduced me to tears of merriment. At one point I did not believe I would survive.”

“The Reverend Mother is made of sterner stuff than that.” Lucia said. “Though I admit we tested her without mercy.”

“I am glad to see you all returned, hale and whole” Lucia said, embracing Jordis warmly before looking at Rigel. “though you have exchanged some of your party members with new faces as well as old.”

“Mother, this is Rigel of clan Orionis, Father’s housecarl from Markath.” Lucia said.

“Honor to you Lady.” Rigel said with a slight bow.

“Be at ease shield-sister.” Lydia said. “I also have the honor to be housecarl to the Thane in Whiterun, as well as adopted Mother to this pack of ravenous wolves. We must send for supplies if we are not to starve.”

“We will need more supplies still when Tayen visits shortly to interview the Jarl’s guest.” Aric said.

“The girls left some time ago to deliver that message.” Lydia said. “Should I ask the nature of your delay in returning, or will my guess be sufficient?”

“Lacking specific details, your guess will be accurate.” Aric said. “We have much to discuss.”

“More than you realize, I will wager.” Sophie said. “We bring news from Windhelm.”

“News?” Aric asked.

“Information is a more appropriate word, perhaps.” Collette said.

“After you departed, we set our spies to watch the Palace.” Sophie said.

“Spies?” I asked

“Spy. Singular. Silda.” Collette said.

“Also known as Silda The Unseen.” Aric said to me.

“She delivered an interesting list of visitors to the Palace of the Kings. Visitors who waited until you were well away from Windhelm.

“The Jarl of Whiterun has a visitor of his own.” Lydia said. “One that does not reside in the dungeon.”

“Who?” Lucia asked.

“Jarl Idgrod Ravencrone.” Lydia said.

“Gods” Runa said, “why would she come here?”

“I asked her.” Aric said. “This is a matter requiring a council of more than just two. Elisif cannot leave Solitude. Idgrod and Balgruf are of a kind. Neither takes a side in the civil war. Both cares only for their people. She is the only Jarl excepting Elisif and Balgruf who knows all.”

“Is it wise to confide in her?” Lydia asked

“I did not confide in her.” Aric said, “Her daughter Idgrod the younger has the gift that Noxaura’s mother possessed.”

“Her daughter is an Oneiromancer?” I asked.

“It appears so. She is still young, and her dreams do not yet come clearly to her, but she discusses them with her mother.” He said. “So, when I began to speak in generalities to the Jarl about these recent activities it took no leap of logic for her to connect the one with the other. There was little point in continuing in my obtuse manner. I asked her to confer with Balgruf. I had not thought she would be here when we returned.”

“Speaking of Morthal,” Lucia said, “Our family may increase by one. Father rescued a newly orphaned girl on the road from Morthal to Dragon’s Bridge.”

“There is much more news from that road than one orphan.” Runa said, “but that can surely wait until Lucia and I have removed our armor.”

* * *

The house was a hive of activity, filled almost to overflowing with laughter, and conversation, the storing of armor and weapons and assorted belongings in a house surely never designed to hold nine adults. A house in which I did not have a place. A house with three women who had claim to Aric’s company during the night, Lucia having ceded the large bedroom to her father for the duration of his stay.

Jordis and Lydia had obviously reached an accommodation. They acted more like sisters than competitors. How would they react to the number of their sorority increasing by one? Do Jarl’s count in that membership? How did Elisif factor?

These thoughts and many more passed through my mind as I borrowed Lydia’s bedroom to change out of my travel garments into some of my more radiant raiment.

“You look quite courtly.” Lydia said. “That is a lovely dress.”

“Thank you.” I said. “I was able to save almost nothing from the wreckage of our cart in the Rift. Enduring the slights and barbs and condescension of the dress makers in Solitude was a small price to pay.”

“I am familiar with the sisters.” Lydia said, “Though you would not think it from my attire.”

“I would never make such an assumption, good Lady.” I said. “And you may recall my borrowed attire when I last visited. I must surely have resembled a poor relation when compared to you and your daughters. You are all so beautiful and blessed with a natural elegance.”

“You flatter me” She said, “I am no Lady. I am a housecarl. I take great pride in it.”

“Truth may be complimentary, Madam, but it is not flattery.” I said, quoting Aric. “Any traveler who may pass you on the road can see for themselves your beauty. It is what we cannot see with our eyes that matters most. That which is important is invisible to the eye.”

“You remind me of Tayen.” Lydia said. “She has such a gift.”

“Now you compliment me.” I said. “I need no gift to see your heart. I see it in your children, in how they treat others, and in how you treat each other. You are the model for what they have become.”

“I fear that you do me more honor than I deserve or can bear.” Lydia said. “I will surely burst if you continue.”

“Then let us discuss another topic.” I said.

“I am about to visit the marketplace to purchase supplies.” Lydia said, “I would welcome your company if you are willing.”

“I would like that.” I said. “I had intended to wander about the City. When I was here last with my father, we both commented on how happy a city is seemed. It is one of my last happy memories of the two of us together.”

“Let us join forces then.” She said

* * *

The afternoon proved as beautiful as the morning. I could almost forget the interview that would take place once Tayen was present. I would never forget what these attempts on my life have cost me.

“I understand that all of your children who have any skill with a sword owe that skill to your instruction.” I said.

“You give me too much credit, I am sure.” She answered. “I gave them all their first lessons in swordsmanship, it is true; even Lucia, who chose a different path. But it was Aric who honed those skills. He would find a tutor for each later, when it became apparent where each of their talents led.”

“I understand he is familiar with many skilled teachers.” I said.

“Yes.” She answered with a grin. “Several of them made his acquaintance from a distance of two sword lengths.”

“He sends his children to be tutored by swordsmen he has faced in battle?” I asked, not fully sure I took her meaning. 

“That they survived their encounter with him says all that is needed for their skill. That he allowed them to survive says all that is needed about their character.” She answered. “It is quite often in life that our firmest friendships begin with conflict.”

“You have the wisdom of a high Priestess.” I said, thinking back to how my relationship with Aric progressed.

“No.” she answered. “I have the wisdom of a Mother. My four daughters who are as we speak eating me out of house and home were not always friends. Quite the reverse. Sophie and Collette were always a pair. It seemed to them that it was they two against the world. It was true, in part when they were alone in Windhelm, surviving as best they could. It took some time once they were adopted before they were convinced that they would never be sent away or abandoned. Before that time Lucia and Runa found it necessary to bond together in mutual defense. When Samuel and Sara arrived, they were so small, arriving so close together that they naturally bonded. They would hide in a cabinet together when their four older sisters would wage war in the house.”

“This must have been difficult.” I said, my mastery of the understatement on full display.

“Yes.” She answered, “it was when Aric was away quite often. All of them were still working through their anger and grief. Most were still angry at their parents for leaving them alone. It did not help that Aric adopted them and brought them home and them immediately left. None were yet ready to accept me as anything other than a caretaker. They were all bundles of pent up pain and anger and energy.”

“I am sorry.” I said, “I did not know it had been so difficult.”

“I was young.” She said “I had never cared for anyone other than myself, and my own Mother, at the end of her life. I had no skill in parenting. So, I used the only skill I knew. I asked Adrianne to make me four wooded swords and four rudimentary sets of hide armor. From that day on, their lives were regimented. An hour of training in the morning, another hour in the evening. An hour of reading, and hour of writing. Chores with Adrianne for an hour, chores with Danica for an hour. When they were old enough to sit in a saddle alone, they began lessons in horsemanship and were assigned chores in the stable. It did not take long for my four saber cats to band together. They became an exhausted sisterhood with a common enemy: me.”

“You must have also been exhausted.” I said, “And it must have grieved you to have four children who had banded against you.”

“I had not yet begun to think of them as my children, and they had not yet begun to think of me as their Mother.” She said. “That took time. I was lucky in that I found unlikely allies to assist me.”

“May I know the names of these allies?” I asked

“You know their names already.” She said, “Vilkas and his twin brother Farkas.”

“You astonish me.” I said, “They are barely older than your four saber cats.”

“It astonished me at the time.” She said. “It was not possible to live in Whiterun without seeing my four daughters training or going about their chores, and the reasons why. It was natural for them all to associate, all being of an age, and the two boys even then were attractive enough that more than just my four girls showed interest. But the boys were also orphans, also adopted. They Father was also often absent. That is why they made a stronger connection with my four, and that is why they confronted them as they finally did.”

She was quiet for a moment before she continued.

“Usually, it is Vilkas who speaks first, but in this case, he took a bit too long to consider what he would say, and Farkas had reached the limit of his patience. ‘What is wrong with you four? You have been given a gift. If you are all so dimwitted that you do not recognize it, climb up to the top of Dragon’s Reach and throw yourself off so this gift can be given to someone with the intellect to recognize it.’ It was the longest statement I can remember Farkas making. Vilkas was only slightly less direct. ‘This is your home and your family if you would only make it so. But it is for you four to accomplish together. All the energy you expend in anger would be better spent building rather than destroying. You have been given this opportunity and you are wasting it. Once it is gone all that you will have left is regret.”

“What you say amazes me.” I said truthfully.

“If anyone else had spoken to them in that fashion they would have rolled their eyes and paid it no mind.” She said. “But they knew the brothers, and what they had endured. They could not so easily dismiss what they heard.”

“It must have been a shock to them.” I said.

“That evening I thought that my hearing was in question.” She said, “the house was so quiet. Each of the girls lost in their thoughts. It took time, but that was our first step to becoming a family.”

“You no longer object when the call you ‘Mother’ I see.” I said

Her smile was instant. “I will not admit that it was fear that made me resist. I had never had so much to lose. I thought it would protect me in some way. It is silly to think about it now, believing that the lose I would feel would somehow be diminished because they called me ‘Lydia’ rather than ‘Mother’. They are all adults now and may call me what they wish, but my heart sings when they call me ‘Mother’.”

“You will make me cry if you continue.” I said.

“Then let us speak of happier things.” She suggested.

We have walked a fair distance through the residential district, seeing Whiterun that was normally reserved for the local denizens. We emerged by the Gildergreen and sat, enjoying the silence of the moment while the priest of Talos was absent.

“You mother was an interpreter of dreams?” Lydia asked me.

“Yes.” I answered. “She was born with the gift; much like the Thane of Morthal’s daughter it seems. It was how she supported the two of us after my father died.”

“Was her experience as difficult as Idgrod the Younger’s?” she asked

“She never spoke of it.” I answered. “I was very young when I left home to become a novitiate of Cybele. By then, she was already very skilled.”

“It must have been difficult for you to leave home so young.” She said.

“it must have been just as difficult for your children to depart for Solitude.” I said.

She never struck me as prone to tears, and she shed none now, but I could see the memory of pain on her face.

“It was the most difficult thing I have ever done in my life, keeping that brave face in place while my family rode away in the cart; waving until they were out of sight.” She said

“I apologize.” I said, placing my hand on her arm, “I did not mean to cause you pain.”

“it is only a memory of pain now” she said, as if she had read my mind. “I walked back into our home to complete silence. I walked through every room. It was as if I was searching for a limb I had misplaced, not remembering where I had left it. For several days I did not move one object in that house. Everything remained just as they had left it.”

“I cannot imagine how that must have felt.”

“My isolation did not last so long, though.” She said. “Aric quickly discovered ‘urgent matters’ that required me to travel to Solitude. Regularly. Occasionally Jarl Balgruf, tiring of the specter of me wandering Whiterun after dark, would conjure ‘messages for the Thane of Whiterun that cannot be trusted to a common courier.’ I became very familiar with the route from Whiterun to Solitude.”

“I should not be so relieved to hear you tell it so, already knowing that this story has a happy ending; but you lift a weight from my heart by saying it.” I said.

Lydia began to laugh. “Jordis was confused at first, thinking me Aric’s wife who had been delayed. She and I had a similar conversation as Rigel, and I had earlier today. Later, when she had begun to share Aric’s bed, she would not look me in the eye during my visits. I was several years older than she, and I found an opportunity to ease her burden. ‘None of us can claim ownership of the Sun, however much we enjoy it’s warmth or light.’ I told her. ‘The Sun belongs to no one, and to everyone. I do not resent the Sun for shining, or anyone on whom it shines.’ It took her a moment to take my meaning, but it eased her mind.” 

“It was very kind of you to do so.” I said, feeling an acute sympathy for Jordis’ situation.

“Aric is a force of nature.” She said. “One cannot own such a force. We can marvel at it. We can love it and share it with others, but we cannot own it.”

“You state it beautifully.” I said.

“I did not always.” she said. “Like some many things in life, it took time.”

“Seeing you and Jordis together today, you reminded me of Sara and Runa where we arrived last; the way you greeted each other, the warmness in your relationship.” I said

“That also developed over time.” She said. “She also had no parenting experience. It was somewhat easier for her, since our family bond was well formed by then, and she became more a sister that a mother to those six. But it was still an adjustment for her.” 

“I fear I have taken up too much of your afternoon.” I said “I apologize. I have enjoyed your company so much I forgot the pack of wolves in your home who have surely eaten all your furniture by now.”

Her laugh brought a smile to my face. “Do not apologize.” She said “I do not often have the opportunity to sit and converse in this manner. It is a rare gift for me.”

“You are too kind.” I said. “If it will not diminish the value of the gift, we should choose another afternoon to sit in this same spot and continue our conversation.”

“I would like that very much.” She said.

We were walking to the marketplace for the requisite supplies when we both saw Lucia and Vilkas walking slowly and closely, talking quietly. The looks on their faces spoke volumes.

* * *

“Silda is confident in what she saw?” Aric asked.

“Yes. She knows Niranye very well.” Sophie said. “Amaund’s visits are rare, but Silda does not easily forget a face. And his bodyguard is a simpleton who will not take the simple precaution of replacing his imperial armor with something less conspicuous in Windhelm.”

There was barely room to move as we all held council after dinner.

“You will understand if I am not familiar with this list of individuals.” I said. “But I recognize a clandestine meeting well enough.”

“Niranye is a high elf living in Windhelm. She is reportedly a shop owner, but likely a Thalmor agent.” Sophie said

“Ulfric has in the past been a Thalmor agent.” Aric said. “He has a close but dormant connection to Elenwen, the Thalmor ambassador.”

“It is no accident that the moment Father left Windhelm she paid Jarl Ulfric a visit.” Collette said.

“It was not that quick.” Sophie said. “It was three days according to Silda’s report.” 

“Amaund Motierre is likewise an agent, though it is less clear for which agency, though he has a connection to the Dark Brotherhood.” Aric said, “His bodyguard Rexus is an imperial who has apparently never learned the art of disguise.”

“Amaund and his idiot guard stayed in Candle-hearth Hall, where Silda could not follow.” Sophie said “She is known to the proprietor Elda Early-Dawn, however, and loitered outside begging until Elda began her walk home. Silda accompanied Elda on her walk and was able to learn from Elda that Amaund and Rexus kept to themselves and barely spoke to each other, let alone anyone else.”

“That surely did not go unnoticed.” Aric said. “Candle-Hearth Hall is not known for its quite atmosphere.”

“It was certainly noticed.” Sophie said. “It was comment on. But that is all.”

“Two agents visit Ulfric after a conversation where he is informed of unusual activity, possibly aimed at Imperial camps.” Aric said. “It would be understandable if he wished to investigate on his own, but not when the agents are these two, and not when it requires three days to summon Amaund.”

“He was reporting to his masters?” Runa asked

“That does not explain Amaund’s presence. “he answered. “Amaund is a Breton, his bodyguard is an Imperial. Niranye is Altmer. Three groups that Ulfric usually does not trust.”

“A cosmopolitan conspiracy.” I said.

Aric looked at me and smiled. “Indeed.” He said, as my heartbeat increased.

 _Do not excite yourself._ I thought _He is not yours tonight._

“It seems we know only slightly more than previously.” Lucia said.

“Will you now finally ask Tayen for assistance?” Lydia asked

“No.” Aric answered. “This is dangerous territory. She is powerful, but whatever we have bitten into is now looking to bite back. They have already attacked two young girls for no other reason than that they resembled Noxaura and Sara. They are spread across Skyrim, possible across Tamriel. They have lost over four-hundred men. They will take any target they find. She is powerful, but she is not prepared for this. None of us are prepared if they choose to bring their full weight to bear. We must stay hidden for now.”

“What about the other Jarls?” Lydia asked.

“Thongvor Silver-Blood and Maven Black-Briar knew nothing.” Aric said. “Thongvor is too focused on foresworn attacks, Maven is too focused on herself. Siddgeir you have already heard of. That is a separate item on my list to discuss with Balgruf. Skald and Korir have not seen Thalmor troops in months.”

“With good reason.” Sophie said. “The Thalmor wish to avoid freezing to death as much as the rest of us.”

“So, our list of allies is Balgruf, Elisif, and Idgrod.” Jordis said.

“Is not Idgrod half mad?” Colette asked.

“No.” Aric said. “She is very wise, but enigmatic. It is for the latter quality that her people distrust her. Do not be deceived by her relaxed nature. She misses nothing.”

“She encountered no Thalmor?” Lydia asked

“None that were still alive.” Aric said. “During the height of Morthal’s vampire incidents they would find dead groups of Thalmor, small groups of two or three, but no larger groups.”

“They were dead? Not nightwalkers?” I asked.

“Dead.” He answered.

“That is odd.” I said.

“Perhaps Thalmor do not taste good?” Runa asked to general laughter.

“They were obviously not prepared properly.” Lucia said to more laughter.

“This is a mystery with no quick solution.” Lydia said. “Any continued inquiry must be handled carefully.”

“I agree.” Aric said. “We have risked much traveling across Skyrim in search of answers. We believed we left no witnesses alive, but someone obviously described Noxaura and Sara to the Thalmor. Both of you will have to take extra precautions.” He said looking at me.

“Do not ask me to cut my hair sir.” I said. “I have grown too fond of what remains after the incident on the road.”

It took some time for the laughter to die down.


	20. The Warrior Priestess

**30th of First Seed**

“If you wish it then of course I will arrange it.” Aric said. “But Lydia would not have offered if it were any inconvenience.”

“You are both very generous, but I would not deprive her of the opportunity to spend time with her daughters.” I said. “And you have much more important considerations than to give me lessons in swordsmanship.” 

It took some time last night for sleep to finally find me as I lay in my borrowed bed in Lydia’s bedroom. It was my own fingers that massaged my shoulder slowly, a shadow of a reminder of the evening before. But my skin had not quite forgotten Aric’s touch, and the memory made me smile as stronger memories still filled my mind.

It was during our morning meal that I made my request.

“I would not have been in such a desperate state in the Rift if I had been a better swordsman.” I said. “Railius was a solider and skilled, but too kind to be an effective teacher. If I was struck it would end the lesson and he would fuss over me for an hour.”

“I would be happy to assist you.” Lydia said. “I will talk to Adrianne this morning about practice armor for you.”

“You are very kind, and I would appreciate the armor very much, but perhaps it is best to find a teacher to whom I am simply another student.” I said.

“In that case, I suggest Amren, but Aric will certainly know someone who will serve.” She said.

“Amren would do well as a teacher for now.” Aric said. “Your technique will improve greatly with his teaching. But he teaches single sword only. If you wish to become proficient in wielding two swords as you did on the road you will eventually need another teacher. Until then Amren will teach you right hand and left separately. You would also benefit from a small potion to help your muscles retain the memory of the training. And, of course, healing potions to help with the bruises you will definitely have after training sessions.”

“I see you intend to fill me to overflowing with your potions once again, sir.” I said. “I will not know my left hand from my right.”

“I will be happy to reacquaint you.” He said, as his left hand found my right.

“I refuse to give in to my urge to wrap my arms around your neck and reacquaint myself with your lips.” I said “Circumstances require discretion. We are packed too close, and too many of us wish your attention. I will not make myself a burden to you or Lydia.”

“You are no burden; you know that well enough.” He said. 

“I do.” I said. “And you know well enough that you have my heart. I know you will not mistake my behavior. Lydia and Jordis have had time to come to terms with sharing you. They do not hang on your neck or look longingly. I must emulate them while we reside together.”

“You must do what is right for you.” He said. “whatever that is. Your happiness is the only thing that matters.”

“I will spare you my description of unbridled happiness, as it is not likely to ever become reality.” I said. “But it is very sweet of you to place my happiness so high. And now, sir, since I feel my resolve will fail me before long, let us each be about our immediate business. For me that involves a visit to the armorer that stands so conveniently near your home. Lydia will see me fitted with practice armor before she lets me out of her sight.”

“in that case madam, my immediate task will be to secure you an instructor, as well as a supply of potions.” He said.

“Give you description of the training, perhaps it would be best to see to the potions first.” I said.

* * *

“How does that feel your Grace?” she asked me.

“I am not qualified to have an opinion.” I answered. “I must rely entirely on your expertise.”

“You two are very close in size.” Adrianne said to Lydia. “This should serve her well.”

“My ignorance is entirely my own fault good Lady.” I said. “I am not used to wearing a tunic and breeches, let alone padding and any sort of armor.” 

“take hold of the sword your grace. Face the post, imagine it is your assailant in the Rift, and send him to Oblivion.” Lydia said.

“You were attacked in the Rift your Grace?” Adrianne asked

“Yes.” I answered. “I would have died if not for the Thane.”

“you wore no armor?” she asked.

“No.” I replied. “It is not the custom of our order to wear armor. We are an order of the Religious, not an order of Warriors.” I said, before realizing. “We were an order of Religious.” I corrected myself.

By her reaction I knew she understood me.

“These are dangerous, unsettled times good Armorer.” I said. “I am resolved to not be a victim again. My skill was lacking. I mean to correct that error.”

“Your Grace has the right of it.” She said. “these are indeed dangerous times. May I speak plainly?” she asked

“Please do.” I answered.

“You can no longer afford to rely on the protection of a priests robes.” She said. “All veneer of civilization has been stripped away. Bandits, brigands, soldiers, assassins; none of them will respect your position as a Priestess. The time for robes is ended. I have armored more Imperial soldiers that I can count. I ask you, allow me the honor of protecting you with armor fit for a high Priestess. It will fit you like a glove, like a second skin. It will become part of you. You will very quickly forget that it is there. If you had been so armored in the Rift you would have met the Thane under very different circumstances.”

It was eloquence. It was also truth. If I had been armored in the Rift, in the mine, on the southern road, I would have fared much better. It seemed that my life had become a warrior’s life. I had admitted as much when I asked for training.

“I am curious what my host and mentor councils I should do.” I said.

“In that case, your Grace, I would council you to never walk out this, or any other city gate, without being armed and armored.”

“Samuel asked me if there was such a thing as a warrior priest. I answered that if he willed it so then the answer was yes.” I said, “It seems that I must chose to be a warrior Priestess.”

“If you will leave it in my hands your grace, I will see to everything.” Adrianne said.

I looked at Lydia.

“You are in good hands, your Grace.” She said.

“Very well.” I said. “It seems that I am entirely in your hands, good Lady.” I said.

“Very good, your Grace.” Adrianne said. “Now, grasp your sword and strike the post.”

* * *

“You father said to me once that he never sought out this life, that he only wanted a land at peace and to raise his family. I thought of those words as your mother and I returned from the armorer.” I said

I still wore the breeches and tunic that Lydia had provided me for the fitting of my practice armor, Lucia’s invitation to join her for a leisurely ride having left me little time to change. We were at the stable while our horses were being saddled.

Lucia seemed about to speak but stopped herself with a small laugh.

“What is it?” I asked

“I was about to offer an opinion on the Divines and their plans for us” she said, “before realizing that I am in no position to lecture a Priestess on divinity.”

“Come now, friend, we have been traveling together too long for that.” I said. “You do not need to mince your words so finely on my behalf. In any case, I have no special insight into what the Divines intend.”

“Then I will say that the Divines lay several paths before us from which we can choose. Some are plainly marked and straight; the destination at the end is clear, even from the start. Other paths are less obvious, and parts are shrouded in mist, or pass through dense wood, and require a guide for us to navigate successfully.”

“I see the gift for poetry runs in your family.” I said.

She smiled. “The Divines chose whom they guide…” she began.

“…and whom they lead astray.” I finished, with a smile to match hers.

“Your path recently has been quite difficult and filled with pain and loss.” She said. “All of us have a choice before us now. We can hide behind city walls, emerging some time hence to a land of someone else’s making and bend ourselves to fit into it, or we can put on our armor, prepare our weapons, and venture forth to assert our claim, our right, to have a say in what the land will resemble when our children walk their own path. I applaud the choice you have made.”

The words had left my lips before I knew they existed. “You will be a Queen of Tamriel if there is any justice in the world.”

Her face blushed as she smiled down at me from her greater height. “You are much too generous, friend.” She said, as she reproduced the warriors clasp we had shared at the Jarl’s hunting lodge.

“It appears we will have company on the path we travel today.” I said as Vilkas approached the stable.

“Honor to you Companion” I said, “The Divines bless us with your company this morning.”

“Reverend Mother.” He said. “Your attire led me astray. I did not recognize you until I was upon you. From a distance you resembled Lucia’s mother.”

“My attire is, indeed, borrowed from Lydia sir.” I answered. “I was informed that one could not be fitted for armor wearing the robes of a Priestess.”

“Armor, your Grace?” he asked.

“Yes. The life of a warrior Priestess has been thrust upon me it seems. There is no point in denying it further.” I said. “I will embrace it, and do my utmost to excel in it, until such time when I can put off the trappings of war and once again embrace the religious life.”

“I beg your Grace not to risk your safety in these dangerous times.” Vilkas said. “I will offer myself, my arm and my sword and my life, as your protection. Allow me and my brethren to face and danger in your place.”

Lucia smiled at the brave companion while he spoke. “It is a very noble offer sir” I said, “But Skyrim is my home, and I will not leave the defense of my home or my person solely in the hands of others, however brave and honorable they are. I must play my part.”

“We are going riding.” Lucia said to him, “if you are free, please join us.”

They smiled at each other as he answered.

“Lady, I am yours.”

* * *

“What can that possibly be?” Vilkas asked.

“Nothing good.” Lucia replied.

Lucia offered to show me the fort where Aric had taken her for her ‘debut’ as she referred to it. We were approaching a watchtower that stood between the fort and Whiterun and were presented with an image that made my heart lurch.

Ten Thalmor soldiers stood by the road. Three Whiterun City guards stood at the entrance to the ruined tower. A Justiciar was speaking with a guard. We were still too far away to hear what was being said.

“You grace, are you armed?” Lucia asked

“As armed as I was on the southern road” almost escaped my lips before I recalled that Vilkas knew nothing of our involvement.

“As armed as the Gods and my training and skill allow.” I said.

“We cannot risk the Reverend Mother’s safety.” Vilkas said to Lucia. “Take her and ride back. I will investigate.”

“By a strange coincidence, I was about to say exactly those words to you.” Lucia said to him in response, a smile forming on her face.

“I will die before I leave the guard to face those people so outnumbered.” Vilkas answered.

‘Those people’ was clearly not meant as a compliment.

“Well, Companion, we cannot have that.” I said before putting my horse to a canter and riding towards the tower.

“Gods.” I heard from two voices behind me.

“I don’t care what you think, you Thalmor bastard.” Could be heard clearly now. “And this ain’t the Summerset Isles. Take your shiny troops and bugger off.”

“You are impudent, sergeant.” the Justiciar said. “The White-gold Concordat give me authority to investigate Talos worship without interference.”

“Well, I ain’t never read it, so you can take that Concordat with you when you BUGGER OFF!” The sergeant replied.

The conversation stopped at our approach, as their attention turned to us.

“Gentlemen,” I began, “What has tempers so raised on this blessed day? Surely, we are all the Gods’ creatures, and as such we should show each other respect.”

Lucia and Vilkas had not been far behind. We were all three now on foot, my companions to my left and right and slightly behind.

As I was riding closer to the tower, I recalled Railius’ words: ‘fear is something you feel before a battle, when you have time to think about it.’ I had more than enough time to acknowledge the truth of it. I had no desire for another battle neither small, nor large. But Vilkas’ words had struck a chord within me, the memory of Jyte and Kirste reborn in my mind. _This is as good a place as any to begin my defense of my home_. I thought.

“Who are you, and what business is it of yours?” the Justiciar asked me.

“My name is Noxaura, I am a High Priestess of the Maetreum of Cybele, and this land in which you stand is my home.” I said. “Since you disturb my home, it is most certainly my business.”

“You do not dress like a High Priestess.” The Justiciar said.

“What is your name, sir?” I asked.

“I am Justiciar Viariss Larethal.” He replied.

“You will forgive my attire, Justiciar Viariss Larethal” I said, “You chose to disturb my home on my riding day.”

The guards at the tower entrance were clearly nervous. The Thalmor soldiers were relaxed, almost bored. It appeared that they did not think they were in any danger. They did not know the very great danger they faced in the tall statuesque figure that wore armor almost identical to theirs.

“Sergeant, Justiciar, would one of you please explain the nature of this disagreement?” I asked.

“There is a fugitive hiding in the tower.” The Justiciar began.

“There is a citizen of Skyrim seeking refuge in the tower.” The sergeant said.

“He is an escaped prisoner. We will not leave until he is again in our custody.” The Justiciar said.

“How do you know he is your escaped prisoner?” I asked, “How close to the tower were you when he escaped and sought refuge here?”

“He escaped us at the bridge north of the fort that stands hard by.” the Justiciar replied.

“And you followed him closely as you pursued him hear?” Lucia asked.

It seemed that only then did the Justiciar notice Lucia.

“You were the armor of an Elf.” He said.

“You are mistaken, sir.” She answered, with a look that did not bode well for the Justiciar, “I wear the armor of several elves, the previous owners having no further use for it.”

“It is a fair question, sir.” I said. “How closely did you track him?”

“We lost sight of him but tracked him hear.” He said, never looking away from Lucia.

“So, it is possible that the man in the tower is not your fugitive.” I said

“It is not possible. This is our fugitive. We will not leave without him.”

“I am the daughter of a Thane of Whiterun.” Lucia said. “I need no one’s council to interpret the Concordat. This is a matter to put before the Jarl. His authority rules here.”

“I do not recognize any authority but my own.” The Justiciar said.

“I did not think you would.” Lucia said, as she extended her arms straight down, dropped to a crouch, and struck the ground with both palms.

The shock of the earthquake dislodged stones from the tower. Everyone was thrown to the ground except Lucia who was still crouched where she was, her palms still pressed against the earth. Energy was swirling from beneath her hands and spreading up her arms. I was not sure what I was witnessing, but I did not have time to ponder further.

I had not brought my rings, or my dagger. I had my cloak but no potions. I cast ebony skin and my bound sword and, as the Justiciar was regaining his feet I removed his head, and the battle began in earnest.

The guard and Thalmor began to exchange arrows. The guards had cover, the Thalmor had none. Vilkas had drawn his greatsword and begun to engage the nearest Thalmor when Lucia began to straighten, unfolding her tall frame and bringing her arms up as she rolled her hands in a fashion I had seen before. The four Thalmor she had targeted began to lift into the air as their bodies began to twist, their faces showing how excruciating their last few moments of life were. I did not watch to the end, as their armor finally twisted and crushed around them, the invisible hand I had first seen on the southern road reaching out once again. Vilkas was taking a toll with his greatsword as I was finding targets for my ice spikes. I was about to raise some of the Thalmor to add to our numbers when I realized that there were no Thalmor left alive.

The silence after battle was deafening. None of us moved from where we were when the battle ended, standing like posts, viewing the carnage. The guards at the tower entrance were the first to move, walking down to the road to view the field of battle closer. Finally, the fugitive in the tower emerged. The shock plain on his face.

“You are wounded sergeant.” I said.

It took him a moment to locate the wound on his shoulder where a Thalmor sword had found its way past his guard and pierced his armor.

“That?” he asked “That’s nothing, lass. I never felt it. I’ll bandage that up in no time.”

I could not help but smile, which he noticed. “Forgive me, sergeant. You remind me of my father. He was a solider, and a sergeant as well, and spoke much like you do.”

“Your father did not yell ‘bugger off’ so frequently, surely.” Lucia said.

“He was never profane in my presence, though there were times that Mother Catilia tried his patience.”

“I meant no disrespect you Grace.” The Sergeant said.

“You do not disrespect, sergeant. Now, let me see your shoulder.”

The carnage was dispersed along the road, but the guards were all clustered around the remains of four crushed, twisted Thalmor. I had seen the two on the southern road and did not wish to refresh my memory.

The guards were not the only ones in that group of men. Vilkas stood there as well, his greatsword still in his hand, the blade resting on his shoulder. He had seen all. He had seen her strike the earth, he had experienced the quake that had thrown all of us to the ground. He had seen the energy swirling from the earth and up her arms. He had watched the ballet of death as she slowly rose, the elegance of her arms and hands as they moved. He looked now at what that dance had wrought. 

‘They had no idea in how deadly a school we have been trained’ she had said. It was clear from Vilkas’ face how true those words were.

Vilkas walked back to where Lucia and I were standing as I tended the sergeant’s shoulder. The guards watched him as he rejoined us, but their vision shifted quickly to the tall, regal, figure in elven armor that had wielded power with such terrible effect. Again, they were not alone in that group.

I had thought I had seen worship on his face before when he looked at her. The look on his face now could not be described with words.

“If you continue to stand and stare, I will begin to think that you received a blow to the head.” She said to him.

“I have been struck dumb beyond any doubt.” He said “but not by any Thalmor. I simply do not know what words are appropriate when addressing a Goddess.”

They smiled at each other as their hands clasped and I found a task that required me to be elsewhere.

“sergeant, please have one of your men retrieve our horses. We need to inform the Jarl immediately what transpired. The fugitive must give testimony. Please do better at keeping hold of him than the Thalmor did.”

“Yes, your Grace.” He replied, as he eased his arm back into his armor.

“And impress upon all of them, guards, and fugitive, that they are not to speak of anything they saw here. Not the slightest detail.”

“That won’t be hard your Grace. None of them want a Thalmor Legion on Whiterun’ s doorstep.” He said.

“eleven dead elves for the sake of one man” I said. “I initiated this. I forced my companions to become involved. If I had turned and ridden in the opposite direction, they would have followed, and this battle could have been avoided. Did I do right?”

“Your Grace” he said, “it is not my place to say.”

“Forgive me sergeant” I said, “I have again confused you with my father.”

“Then if your grace will not be insulted, I will speak as if you were kin to me.” he said.

“You will not offend.” I said.

“If you had ridden away there would four dead guards, me included, and that man there as good as dead.” He said. “We was never going to give him up without a fight. They think the Concordat gives them the right to do as they please. Maybe it does, but I never agreed to it, and I won’t bend the knee to them.”

“What is your name sergeant?” I asked.

“Alens, your Grace. Sergeant Alens.” He said

“Thank you sergeant Alens for standing in my father’s place.” I said.

“Your Grace, I am honored.” He said.

“Please excuse me, I must confer with my companions.”

* * *

“It must be you.” Vilkas said. “You are the fastest rider. There is no one who could keep pace with you, let alone match you. We will only slow your progress.”

“Vilkas and I will be safe until you return.” I said. “I would not rest easy leaving this small guard to explain the carnage on the road. Speed is what is called for now. There is yet a chance that this can be concealed, but we must do so quickly.”

“I am not comfortable with this plan.” Lucia said.

“I know.” Vilkas said. “But we have no choice. Ride hard. Inform the Jarl. Return quickly. And do not forget the carts.”

* * *

“Honored Jarl, if there is fault to be found then it must be mine.” I said. “It was my decision to interfere. It was my actions that brought this situation to your council chamber.”

“The Reverend Mother is too quick to forget that hers was not the first voice to suggest that an intersession was necessary.” Lucia said.

“The Thane’s eldest daughter is correct” Vilkas said, “And I am sure, when asked, that she will also recall that hers was also not the first voice to suggest an intersession was necessary.”

“It is not a contest.” Lucia said to him.

“It never is” he replied, the smile almost splitting his face in half, “When one does not finish first.”

“Peace, I beg you.” Jarl Balgruf said to the pair, “A moments peace so I may consider what has landed on our doorstep.”

* * *

It was an entire company that responded to Lucia’s news, led, at least in part, by the Jarl’s housecarl; that part that was not led by the Thane of Whiterun.

“There must surely be no one left in Whiterun.” I said as I saw the vanguard force: Aric, Lydia, Jordis, Rigel, Lucia, Runa, Sophie, Colette, and Farkas.

“do not be surprised to find a rearguard made up of Companions and warriors that would gladly fight and die for the Thane and his family.” Vilkas said as he watched the column approach.

“Do I see correctly?” I asked. “Are those lances?”

“Yes.” He answered as both of us observed Sophie and Colette in the vanguard. “They are rangers when afoot, and lancers when ahorse. They practice by pulling small pickets that are partially buried in the ground at a full gallop. We should arrange a demonstration. It is a sight to see.”

It was, perhaps, predictable that it would be Lucia, Runa and Farkas that would gallop to the fore and reach us first.

“Did we not agree that you would allow others their fair share?” Farkas asked his brother.

“As I recall it, Brother, you declined the opportunity, and I was forced to set out alone.” Vilkas said.

“I declined the opportunity to stand by and watch the two of you, for the one-thousandth time, make eyes at each other and take the long way around the barn rather than the direct path to what you both clearly desire.” Farkas answered. “You did not inform me that you had made other arrangements.”

“Your brother is blameless in this, Companion.” I said. “This dance was arranged by someone else. I am responsible for this.”

“Never in life, your Grace.” Vilkas said. “We three were of one mind. You simply took your opportunity while Lucia and I were arguing about who would be first.”

“This column could ride to Whiterun and back again in less time.” Runa said. 

“it was not really an argument about priority.” Lucia said, “It was more a discussion about gender roles.”

“It was no such thing.” Vilkas said. “I thought at the time that it was my responsibility to protect you both. Now that I am better informed, I freely admit my error.”

“Your protection was invaluable good Knight.” I said. “I was completely unprepared.”

“The Justiciar whose body lies several feet from his head would disagree your Grace.” Vilkas replied.

“That was your handiwork your Grace?” Sophie asked, with a look on her face that I had seen from another sister on another road.

“I am ashamed to admit that the first blow struck was mine.” I said.

“I recall a blow that preceded yours that threw us all to the ground.” Vilkas said.

“What happened to these four?” Farkas asked as he stood over the Thalmor that Lucia had crushed.

“We will discuss it another time.” Vilkas said, using a hand signal that ended all questions.

Almost all questions.

“Does the tower seem to lean a bit more to the right than is usual?” Runa asked.

* * *

“Was the man in the tower the fugitive that escaped the Thalmor after all?” the Jarl asked.

“Yes.” Irileth said

“Who is he?” Balgruf asked

“Just a man morning his wife. He was taken at the Shrine of Talos west of Fellglow Keep when he was placing a keepsake at the shrine.” She answered.

“We are familiar with that shrine.” Balgruf said as he looked at Aric. “Elisif gave my brother Torygg's War Horn to place at that shrine in memory of her husband.”

That marked the beginning of his relationship with Elisif. A journey that began with pain and grief and ended with Aric wearing her wedding ring on a chain around his neck. It is not what should have passed through my mind when we were discussing a danger much more immediate to Whiterun.

“The Thalmor are familiar with it as well.” Aric said, “They frequently confront worshipers at that shrine.”

“does his account of his escape match the account given by the headless Justiciar?” Balgruf asked, glancing at me for a moment.

“Yes.” Irileth said. “He jumped off the bridge, swam down river, hid among the rocks, and traveled south, passing to the west of the fort before finally reaching the tower.”

“In that case, something is out of place.” Aric said. “Northwatch Keep would normally be their destination for a prisoner such as this. Granted, they had a journey before them, but I have never known Thalmor escorting prisoners to strike off cross country to save time. They prefer to parade prisoners on the main roads to display their dominance.”

“It they traveled west across country from the Shrine that would place them just slightly north of the bridge.” Balgruf said as he consulted his map.

“It is very good navigation for anyone who is not familiar with the terrain.” Irileth said.

“There is more to this than meets the eye.” Balgruf said. “we will add this to our list of topics when we meet in Privy Council with the Jarl of Morthal tomorrow.”

“My Jarl, may I request the presence of the Reverend Mother at the Privy Council?” Aric asked. It felt as if my heart had moved up and lodged in my throat. “She was present and can give personal testimony.”

“I am delighted for any opportunity to spend time with the Reverend Mother.” Balgruf said as he smiled at me. “She may certainly attend if it will not inconvenience her.”

It would inconvenience me greatly. It would inconvenience my digestion if nothing else. I wanted nothing of the affairs of Jarls. I was already too involved in this matter.

“I will be honored to attend, Jarl, and I will pray that the Divines guide us to the truth.” I said.

“Well stated your Grace.” Balgruf said. “It only remains for me to bid you all good night. I will see some of you in the council tomorrow.”

We paused under the Gildergreen to bid goodnight to the twin brothers.

“Brave Companion” I said, “Thank you for your protection today. I do not doubt that I owe you my life.”

“It is very generous of you your Grace” he said, “But I have enough experience to know a warrior Priestess when I see one in combat. You needed no one’s protection.”

“But I did Sir Knight.” I responded. “I am not so brave as you may think. I have not had to be in my cloistered life. Your protection, and the protection of that tall woman who looks at you so lovingly, allowed me to be brave. If not for you two I might not have acted. I regret that I placed you both in danger.”

“We may save our discussion over who was brave and who was in danger for another time, your Grace.” He said. “For my part, I would fight alongside you again even to the gates of Oblivion.”

“You are very kind.” I said, as I glanced at Lucia. “Now, I believe you two are owed some privacy. For myself, I see a hot bath in my future, followed by much needed rest.”

“Excellent advice for us all.” Aric said and he hugged his daughter, exchanged a warrior’s clasp with Vilkas, and led the rest of his family home.

We were surprised upon opening the door to see a figure sitting by the fire with a cup of wine.

“I had begun to be concerned.” Serana said as she rose from her chair, “The house is not usually empty at this time of night.”

We all stood for a moment in the silence before a short laugh escaped Aric’s lips.

“Have I missed something?” Serana asked.


	21. Banahrafn

**1st of Rain’s Hand**

“There is no need for this” Lucia was saying to her twin daughters, “We have sufficient room for everyone.”

“At this rate, Mother” Collette answered, “There will be no room to walk safely without stepping on visitors as they sleep.”

“Please do not leave your family so soon on my account.” I said to the twin rangers. “I have imposed upon you too long. Whiterun has an excellent Inn that will be more than adequate for a simple Priestess of the Order of Communities.”

“I regret that I have not had the opportunity to come to know you as well as my sisters, your Grace. But I know you well enough to recognize that you are no simple Priestess.” Sophie said, glancing at her mirror image as she spoke. But for their armor and the manner in which they kept their hair it would not be possible to tell one from the other. “It was not only the events of yesterday that kept the four of us talking so long into the night. Lucia and Runa shared an account of the road all of you traveled recently. That account alone would have been enough; the addition of a headless Justiciar and several impaled Thalmor soldiers simply placed the final seal upon it.”

“In any case, we have delivered our report and taken our ease in the house we first called home and spent time with this family that we love so much.” Colette said “Our lives in Windhelm are not entirely idle ones, despite aspersions to the contrary. We have tasks left unfinished, that require our attention.”

“I did not say your lives were idle.” Runa said, “I said that I had never seen so many servants for only two people.”

“Eastmarch is just as unsettled as anywhere else in Skyrim.” Sophie said. “For some, it is more so.”

“Ulfric does not lift a finger to assist anyone who is not Nord.” Collette, “unless there is direct profit in it for him.”

“It falls to others to ensure that the other races in Windhelm and Eastmarch are protected and defended.” Sophie said. “A large portion of that burden falls to us.”

“Twin Protectors of Eastmarch.” I said. “It takes no effort to see whose children you are. You have your Mother’s manner.”

“You are too kind.” Lydia said. “For myself, I will always look at them and see the little girls that would make such a mess of the bath.”

“I apologize” I said, “I seem to have something in my eye.”

“We will travel north and visit Samuel and Freya before returning to our life of idle leisure.” Sophie said

“He will be very happy see you both.” Lydia replied. “It will be a holiday from training and bookkeeping.”

“Please give him my regards.” I said, “We shared a horse, and traded friendly banter for some time.”

“You rode double with Samuel?” Collette asked, “and he did not swoon?”

“He was most at risk in the beginning.” Serana said “Closer to the end he had grown accustomed to having a woman pressed so closely.”

“I trust someone has warned Freya of this development, and that increased vigilance is necessary.” Sophie said.

“I noted the looks that passed between them during my brief stay. She cannot possibly fail to notice.” I said.

“I am sure she has not, but she should be informed that the fence that had separated Nora and Samuel is now missing a section.” Collette said.

“She is a grown woman and needs no council when it comes to youthful attraction.” Lydia said.

“Come, sister. The sun climbs the sky and we must pack and be off.” Sophie said.

The sisters went downstairs to pack their belongings. It was only a few moments later that the door to the house opened and a Redguard man entered. 

“Amren, welcome” Lydia said. “Please come in and meet your new student, Reverend Mother Noxaura. Your Grace, this is Amren, formally a Redguard solider, now a sword instructor here in Whiterun and the region nearby.”

“I am honored, your Grace.” Amren said.

“Thank you, sir.” I said. “I would be honored in return if you would both of you please use the name my mother gave me. My name is Noxaura.”

“As you wish Noxaura.” Amren said. “The Thane has spoken to me regarding your training. If it is convenient for you, I would like to begin your training now.”

“I am willing, sir, but I have a pressing appointment today, and I must admit that I have no idea what time of day it will be.” I answered.

“Have no fear.” Lydia said. “The Jarl will hold court and hear petitions until Noon. Your council meeting will not begin before that.”

The words ‘Reverend Mother’ and “Council with the Jarl’ were obviously having an effect my new sword instructor, as he reevaluated the nature of his student.

“In that event, sir, I am available now. I will collect my practice equipment, though I will confess now that I will require assistance with the armor.”

“I will instruct you on that as well, your…Noxaura.” Amren said.

“I will fetch your tunic and breeches.” Lydia said. “I was able to clean off most of the blood.”

It appeared from the look on his face that his reevaluation of his student was not yet complete.

* * *

Amren chose a location behind the Apothecary near the city wall for our training. For the next hour he evaluated my current skills in holding and swinging my practice sword, my body posture, and my footwork. We ended with a mock battle between the two of us.

“We will always end our lessons with such a test.” He said. “There is no point in testing you when you are well rested and fresh. You will be tested at the end of the lesson when you are fatigued, and your arm and hand are tired.”

“My arm and hand are almost useless.” I said. “I am not accustomed to the weight of a sword made my steel. It has been my custom to employ a bound weapon, which has no weight.”

“That explains your lack of forearm strength.” He said. “we shall work on that as well. You may find in battle that a weapon that persists for more than a few minutes has its advantages. If not, the added strength will not hurt. Now, attack me.”

Our mock battle lasted barely one minute. Amren appeared as dry as when we had begun. My sweat had begun to penetrate my leather practice armor.

“That will suffice for now.” Amren said. “I have a clear enough picture in my mind to commit a training schedule to parchment. We will train once a day for the first seven days and twice a day after that if you remain in Whiterun that long. If not, I will give you a copy of what I have written, and you may continue to train with one of your companions.”

“I thank you sir.” I said. “I cannot recall when I was last this exhausted so early in the day.”

“It will become more difficult hence forth. I have until now not counter attacked. Beginning tomorrow that will not be the case.” He said.

“I shall remind the Thane of the potions he promised me.” I said.

It had been barely twelve hours since my last bath, and my borrowed tunic and breeches again need washing.

“It is clear that I shall need several changes of clothing if my training is to extend to two sessions a day.” I said to Lydia as I dried my hair.

“that is easily supplied.” Lydia said. “we are very much of a size. I have more than enough supple leather, and Adrianne has an assistant that does excellent work. It will take no time at all. Extra boots would also be a good idea. I will clean this pair, and place sage in each to refresh them.

“Can I really be so ravenous this soon after breakfast?” I asked devouring bread, butter, and cold mutton.

“Your body will adjust in time.” Lydia replied. “Or you could ask Aric to show you how to draw energy from the Earth, though it is not nearly as enjoyable as what you are consuming now.”

“That was what Lucia did at the watchtower yesterday, was it not?” I asked. “that was where she drew the energy that she needed to…” I did not know how to finish my question.

“Yes.” Lydia answered. “It is not an option for me, but certainly it is for you. Think upon it.”

Sophie and Collette had departed, and it appeared that Rigel was about to.

“The Jarl has provided an escort of six men.” Aric said. “They will accompany Rigel to Rorikstead where she will retrieve the cart. These six will remain in Rorikstead and relieve six others who will accompany Rigel to Markath before returning to Whiterun. It is a minor alteration of the normal changing of the guard.”

“She will be sad to leave you.” I said.

“She will be sad to leave us.” He said. “She has grown fond of all of you. She asked me to remind you of the promised journey south.”

“She may remind me herself.” I said, “I will not allow her to depart without saying farewell.”

My hair was still damp when I found her and her escort at the stable, having a private farewell with Jordis.

“This is not goodbye,” I reminded her, “for we shall surely see one another again soon.”

“I will not insult you and remind you of the warriors promise you made.” she said. “I will be very disappointed if you are not alive to keep it.”

“She will be in the company of the Thane.” Jordis said “What could possible befall her?”

“It is not as if calamity follows the Thane wherever he goes.” Rigel replied.

“I promise to be careful. Until then, Divines bless you and protect you on your journey, all of you.” I said as I look at her escort.

“Sergeant Alens, I trust I see you well, and somewhat healed.” I said

“For that I have your grace to thank.” He said. “After what I saw yesterday, I took you for one of them warrior Priestesses from the old Epics, but one of the lads recognized you from the Temple a while back when you helped his brother. He was the one that told me you was a Healer. Well, I learned that well enough for myself. My shoulder feels better than it has in years.”

“I am very glad to hear it sergeant.” I said, my face feeling flushed. “And yours, it seems, is not the only familiar face from yesterday.”

“No, your grace, two of our squad you did not meet yesterday. The rest of us owe you our lives. We won’t never forget that.” He said.

“We fought together, sergeant.” I said, “I owe as much to you.”

“You are very generous lass, but we know the truth of it.”

“Remember,” I said quietly, for his ears only “nothing about yesterday can be repeated. Not even to the member of your squad who were not there.”

“The lads know well enough what’s at stake.” He said. “It was bandits that attack us. The captain of the guard stood us all in formation yesterday and told us plainly what the situation is. Every man that was there yesterday, during the battle or after, has as much to lose. None of them want those Thalmor bastards burning down Whiterun and slaughtering our families. Begging your pardon miss.”

I looked at him and could not contain it any longer.

“May I hug you, sergeant, as if you were my father?” I asked, as my tears fell, and my voice broke.

“Course you can lass.” He said.

I hugged him until my sobs subsided.

* * *

We arrived together. I wore the finest attire I owned, courtesy of the sisters in Solitude. Aric’s wardrobe was just as fine as what he wore for his visit with Elisif. The rings on each of my hands were my own, the trigger spells recharged. The necklace I wore about my neck was borrowed. 

“It brings out your eyes.” Lucia had said. “You look so pretty.”

Aric wore a dagger only for show. I knew he needed no weapon do defend himself.

“welcome brother.” Balgruf said to him. “Welcome Reverend Mother.”

“Divines bless you, and protect you honored Jarls.” I said to both the Jarls in attendance. “May they provide us the wisdom and insight to unravel this mystery. I am afraid we will need both in abundance.”

“An excellent prayer your Grace.” Balgruf said.

“You did not present the Reverend Mother when we took council on Morthal, Thane. Must I always be second to Balgruf?” Idgrod asked.

“I was not yet Thane of Hjaalmarch Jarl.” Aric answered, “And the journey to Morthal had been long and tiring.”

“I would have been honored to meet you Jarl, though I would have made a poor impression in my disheveled, unwashed state.” I said

“Well, you are neither of those now, Reverend Mother.” She replied. 

“Let us sit.” Balgruf said. “We have much to discuss.”

“This knot is well and truly tangled.” Idgrod said after all the details were reviewed. “Yesterday’s events may yet prove to be unconnected to the rest, but I agree that the behavior of the Thalmor does not fit their usual pattern.”

“None of this fits their usual pattern.” Balgruf said. “They have never employed stealth on this scale. It does not suit their purpose.”

“They had abandoned stealth in Dragon’s Bridge after their losses in the mine.” Aric said. “They were searching the countryside openly, though they were careful to avoid the Stormcloak camp.”

“Their losses on the southern road were certainly not clandestine” Balgruf said, “They were scattered along the road for all to see.”

“My daughter was quite haunted by the battle on that road.” Idgrod said. “It disturbed her sleep for several days.”

“Your daughter dreamed of the battle?” I asked

“Yes.” She replied. “She is a troubled girl, haunted by dreams she cannot control. There is not a mage in Skyrim I have not consulted. No one can help her.”

“Forgive me for speaking plainly Jarl, but she is in no need of help of that sort.” I said, “she is in need of instruction. Your daughter and my mother share the same gift.”

“The Reverend Mother’s mother was an Oneiromancer.” Aric said.

“I beg you all,” I said, “would one of you please refer to me as Noxaura? It is my name, and I will soon forget it else.”

“I am most happy to be on a first name basis with you if you wish Noxaura.” Balgruf said with a smile.

“He is a bachelor” Runa had said as I was dressing. “If you flirt with him, he will give you no peace.”

“I have no intention of flirting with the Jarl.” I said, “And I will have your father for protection.”

“You will need it.” She replied.

“My mother supported us by interpreting dreams.” I explained, “our home had a room with a bed and chair, fragrant herbs, and warm light. Visitors would fall asleep and dream, and my mother would interpret. It is a rare gift, and my mother’s gift was rarer still. When she would fall asleep her own dreams were sometimes of events occurring elsewhere, and occasionally of events yet to occur.”

“Do you recall when her dreams were upset by this battle?” Aric asked

“No, it was some time ago. It was the usual disturbance we have come to expect.” She said. “Except that in this case she cried out ‘banarafin’ each night at about the same hour.”

Aric sat straight up at the sound of that word. “Are you certain that was what she said?” he ask, his gaze intense.

“As near as I can pronounce it.” She said. “It sounded a touch foreign when she said it.”

“ _banahrafn_ ” he said.

“That is it exactly.” She said. “You know it.”

“I do.” He said

“Does it mean something?” I asked

“It means ‘Raven of Death’.” He said.

“Well, that explains all.” Idgrod said. “My daughter described a raven with glowing wings swooping down delivering death to the Thalmor on the road. Why do the two of you look at each other in that fashion?”

“I do not recognize the language.” Balgruf said.

Aric looked at me as he answered.

“Not many would.”

“Did she describe anything else about the battle?” I asked to distract the Jarls.

“A figure on a flaming horse.” She answered. “The hand of the Gods reaching out from wherever the Gods reside, crushing the Thalmor and sweeping them aside. It had a fanciful sound to it. Many of her dreams sound so when she describes them afterwards. The memories fade soon, as most dreams fade. She will not likely recall much detail now.”

“It is a very artistic description, but it distracts us from the point.” Balgruf said. “What are the Thalmor plotting in Skyrim, and why do they require stealth to accomplish it? They defeated all Tamriel once. They do not need subterfuge to repeat that victory.”

“Their defeats mount.” Aric said. “Their combined losses now exceed four hundred men. The loss of so many cannot be concealed. Their retribution certainly will not be. They will not wish to.”

“Then why do we not see legions of Thalmor marching across Skyrim?” Idgrod asked.

“Because it is not only from us that this is being concealed.” I said.

I had everyone’s attention, and I was certain I did not like it.

“I begin to see a path through this labyrinth.” I said, looking at Aric. “You said before that part of this is aimed at Elenwen. The need no secret plot to remove their ambassador, they could simply recall her.”

“Unless they cannot.” Aric said. “Elenwen is the Thalmor’s link to Ulfric, and Ulfric opposes the empire. It is in the interest of the Aldmeri Dominion to keep Skyrim divided. Ulfric would not trust any replacement. The Thalmor would lose their agent. An agent that is also the leader of the Stormcloak rebellion.”

“Ulfric would lose his source of supply in such a case.” Balgruf said. “The Stormcloaks would be weakened, which would strengthen the Empire’s position in Skyrim.”

“The Thalmor wish us to continue to fight amongst ourselves.” Idgrod said. “They wish the balance between the two sides maintained.”

“Clearly some Thalmor are of a different opinion.” I said, “Who was that Thalmor you described from the outpost? The one with the rod and chain of office? The one you remarked on?” I asked.

“Rod and chain of office?” Balgruf asked, his attention as well as Idgrod’s now on Aric. “A member of the Aldmeri Council was at the outpost?”

“Yes.” Aric said. “Corelas, High Counselor of the Aldmeri Dominion. He had written orders in his possession to remove and replace Elenwen, and to establish a secret outpost and transfer all prisoners to it.”

“Remove and replace?” Balgruf asked.

“He was to execute her and take her place as ambassador.” Aric replied.

“What was your remark concerning him?” Idgrod asked.

“That it would have been wiser for him to have memorized his orders and then destroyed them.” Aric said.

“The Thane also discovered that this plot is not contained within the borders of Skyrim.” I said. “It extends to the Summerset Isles as well.”

“Clearly there is a faction in the council that is no longer satisfied with things as they presently stand.” Idgrod said.

“If that is true, it is not control of Skyrim they seek.” Balgruf said, “their goal is control of the Isles. They see a destabilization of Skyrim as a tool to achieve that.”

“Forging a tool takes effort.” I said in the silence that followed.

“Your Grace?” Balgruf asked

“It is something Mother Hamal said to me.” I replied, “Forging a tool takes effort. And time. If they have just begun to forge a tool, would they start in Skyrim?”

“No, we are too small a tool to accomplish this alone.” Balgruf said.

“We are not the final tool.” Aric said. “We play our part, but the true tool is Cyrodiil. It is the Empire itself they aim at. Destabilizing the Empire would be sufficient. Another war with the Empire would distract the Isles and draw large numbers of troops to Cyrodiil and Skyrim. What troops remained in the Isles would be loyal to this council faction. Those are the conditions they seek. Seizing control would be simple under those conditions.”

“Keeping control would be more difficult.” Balgruf said.

“They would have large numbers of troops in Cyrodiil and Skyrim.” Aric said. “It would take some time for the Commanders in the field to be informed. They would have to then disengage and conduct an orderly retreat while being pursued and harassed, all without reinforcement from the Isles. Any forces able to return to the Isles would be weakened and depleted.”

We were all quiet for a moment, each lost in his own thoughts.

“The Emperor must be informed.” Idgrod said.

“The Emperor’s personal guard was assisting the Thalmor in Haafingar.” Aric said. 

“You mentioned that the Penitus Oculatus at the secret outpost attacked you without warning.” I said. “Yet you knew those that were stationed in Dragon’s Bridge. You said those men come from Solitude.” I said.

“That is correct.” Aric said.

“But the men at the outpost attacked you without warning.” I said

“What is it your Grace?” Idgrod asked.

“The men at the outpost did not recognize the Thane or his children.” I said. “They did not recognize them, because they did not come from Solitude. They came directly from Cyrodiil.”

“How many Penitus Oculatus died at the outpost?” Balgruf asked.

“Approximately thirty.” Aric said.

“That should have reverberated across Skyrim.” Idgrod said.

“Even if it had been interpreted as a battle between the Thalmor dead and the Imperial dead.” Balgruf said “Yet we have heard nothing.”

“It seems that the Thalmor are not the only ones to have clandestine troops moving about Skyrim.” I said.

“There appears to be a faction within the Imperial Legion that sees an advantage in this plan and supports it.” Aric said. “They may think a weakened Aldmari Dominion could only benefit the Empire.”

“Even if that threatens the Emperor?” I asked.

“Possibly.” He answered, “if they believe one Emperor is as good as another, of if they believe a new Emperor would suit their purpose better. We are still left with the same problem. We do not know how to deliver a message to the Emperor safely. We do not know how close they are to him. We could succeed in informing him only for him to find that he is isolated.”

“If they are already so close, then their plan is almost complete” Balgruf said, “and we have discovered this too late.”

“Must we not at least try?” I asked.

“We cannot.” Aric said. “We do not yet know enough. It is not only our safety we risk. If these forces believe we are close to uncovering their plan they may choose to assassinate the Emperor before we can inform him. We still lack information; Information that, I fear, does not reside in Skyrim.”

“Where then might it reside?” I asked.

“Cyrodiil.” He answered.

* * *

The afternoon was becoming evening as we broke for refreshments and to stretch our legs. I stood on the balcony at the top of Dragon’s Reach and viewed the surrounding landscape. My legs and arms and almost every other muscle I could name reminded me of my morning lesson, and what I could expect every day if I truly wished to become a more proficient swordsman. Aric did not need Tayen’s gift to interpret what was on my mind.

“If you are diligent, and do to skip lessons, this pain will soon be a distant memory.” He said as he massaged my shoulder from behind.

I leaned back against his chest and let out a sigh that could surely be heard throughout Dragon’s Reach.

“If you continue in that most excellent manner sir I will melt in your arms and your council will be reduced in number.” I said.

“We cannot have that.” Said a voice from behind us.

“Forgive me, Jarl.” I said to Idgrod. “I received my first sword lesson this morning and ever muscle in my body aches. The Thane was easing the pain in my shoulders.”

“If this is a service that the Thane provides for the general population, I will immediate reserve a lesson for the morning.” She said with a smile and a laugh.

“You need only ask, Jarl.” Aric replied with a smile of his own.

“Is it the custom in your order for Priestesses to train with the sword?” she asked me.

“It is quite the opposite Jarl.” I answered. “Sadly, my life of late has seen too much violence. I bear many scars as evidence that if I am to survive longer, I must defend myself more proficiently.”

“You showed great insight in the council your Grace, and your opinion on longevity shows great wisdom.” Idgrod said to me.

“You are too generous honored Jarl.” I answered. “I am still too young to claim much in the way of insight or wisdom. You have a reputation for an abundance of both; a reputation that is well deserved.”

“You have found a beautifully worded way of reminding me of my age your Grace.” She said.

“It was not my intent Jarl.” I said.

“I did not think it was your Grace.” She said

“Has the Thane been entertaining you with a retelling of how he captured a dragon in this very room only to let him go and ride off on him to what we all thought was his certain demise?” Balgruf asked.

“He has not.” Idgrod said, looking at Aric. “I had always thought that simply a fanciful tale.”

“It is a quite genuine tale.” Balgruf said. “I was present for the entirety of it.”

“It is perhaps a story for another occasion.” Aric said.

“We are all here now.” Idgrod said “Taking our refreshment and breathing the clean evening air. It is the perfect time for such a story.”

“Please tell us.” I said to him. “You have kept me in suspense long enough.”

“His name is _Od-Ah-Viing_ ” Aric began, “Which means Snow-Hunter-Wing. I called his name to summon him. His eagerness to meet me in battle helped set the trap. I required his aid to reach Alduin, who had retreated to Sovngarde to regain his strength. Skuldafn, the entrance Alduin used is only accessible by those with wings. Odahviing agreed to be my transportation in exchange for his freedom.”

“You traveled to Sovngarde?” I asked. 

“Sovngarde? Truly?” Idgrod asked. 

“Yes. It is where I finally defeated Alduin, with help from three heroes of old.” He said.

“You traveled to the land of the dead, the realm of fallen heroes, and fought beside them to defeat Alduin, the First of all Dragons.” I said.

“That is a concise summation.” He said as he smile at me.

We three certainly stood there in stunned amazement, but I took no note. My vision was consumed by him, this man who was so much more than man. The man I loved.

“Will there ever be a time when you will recount a moment from your life that is totally mundane?” I asked him, not able to take my eyes from his.

“I can recite a list of foods I do not like, if that would suffice.” He said, his eyes and his smile swelling my heart in my chest.

“That is the most amazing story I believe I have ever heard.” Idgrod said.

“That story makes me glow with pride that I have such a hero for a sword brother.” Balgruf said. “The effect does not diminish with the retelling.”

“You are all very gracious, but we must return to the topic before the hour becomes too late.” Aric said.

“I believe we have a fair map drawn.” Balgruf said. “It is only left now to determine how we will act.”

“May I ask a question?” I asked

“Certainly.” Balgruf said.

“Ulfric was a Thalmor agent.” I said. “His contact was Elenwen. Aric visits and speaks vaguely of clandestine activity. Ulfric’s first action upon hearing this news is to call two other agents: a Thalmor agent and an agent of unknown agency.”

“I follow you closely, your Grace.” Balgruf said. “What is your question?”

“If Ulfric was aware of the activity, what purpose the visit from the agents? One does not call agents to discover what is already known.”

“True.” Balgruf said, “though there are other uses for agents. Let us assume Ulfric did not know. Why then these two agents?”

“There are only three entities in Skyrim that could mount the activity I described to Ulfric in vague terms: The Empire, the Thalmor, and the Stormcloaks. Ulfric needs no agents to report on Stormcloak activity. His connection with Elenwen is dormant, it must now pass through Niranye. Amaund must be Ulfric’s connection to the Empire.”

“So, it appears that Jarl Ulfric was doing much as we are now.” Idgrod said, “he was taking council and seeking information.”

“He did not know.” I said.

“It appears he did not.” Aric said, “though nothing is certain with Ulfric.”

“Did Elenwen know?” I asked “Was she aware of the plot on her life? If not, do we gain an advantage by informing her?”

“Possibly.” Aric said. “I see no path to preventing this plot from succeeding that passes through Cyrodiil or Skyrim. If the Aldmeri Council is informed of the faction in their ranks, and what they plan, informed before large numbers of Thalmor soldiers leave the Isles, it is possible that they may end this plot themselves.”

“Let us, for the moment, stand your question on its head: do we lose an advantage by informing Elenwen?” Idgrod asked.

“I cannot see how we would.” Balgruf said, “If she can be convinced that the plot is genuine.”

“None of the Thalmor officers or officials we encountered memorized and then destroyed their orders.” Aric said. “I have all their written orders, complete with official seals, as well as a rod and chain that she will surely recognize. If she does not believe the evidence, then the next attempt on her life will succeed.” 

“Then it is only left to deliver the evidence to her.” Balgruf said. 

“That does not sound the least bit difficult.” Idgrod said, her voice thick with sarcasm.

* * *

“So,” Railius said, “has anything of importance occurred recently? Anything at all?”

“Please stop smiling at me in that fashion Father, it is unbecoming.” I answered him.

“I’m happy for you lass.” He said, “both of you.”

“It was one night, Father.” I said. “There may not be another. With Serana’s return, the number of women who covet his time has increased. It would be unseemly in the extreme for the four of us to draw lots or chart the days of the calendar to determine who has the honor of sharing his bed that night. And I will not risk hurting Lydia.”

“She knows well enough that he doesn’t belong to anyone.” Railius said. “she said so herself.”

“They are husband and wife in all but name.” I said. “She is Mother to his children. Out of all the women he has known in the physical sense she is the only one who can make that claim.”

“But he didn’t marry her.” He said.

“He has married none of them.” I said, “He wears Elisif’s wedding ring around his neck, but that is different.”

“Some men are not the marrying kind.” Railius said.

“I admit that I dreamed about a home, a family, children of our own. A simpler life.” I said. “But, in my defense, I knew I was dreaming.”

“You are dreaming now lass.” Railius said. “But it is still real.”

“Until I wake up, and you are still gone.” I said.

“I am not really gone, lass. Not while you remember me.” He said.

“Then you will never be gone, for I will remember you until my life ends.” I said.

“He knows the way to Sovngarde well enough. You two could visit me.” He said.

“Divines, I had never thought of that.” I said. “Would it be possible do you think.?”

“Let me ask around.” He said. “Someone here must know.”


	22. Forward is not always the best direction

4th of Rain’s Hand

“Head upright. Rear leg slightly more to one side. Remember, your back and hips are a single unit, your core should be tight.” Amren said. “It is a great deal to remember.” I said.

“It will become second nature in time.” Amren replied. “Now, passing step and cut. Again. And again.”

Our secret battle with the Thalmor was, for the moment, being fought by couriers. Aric had dispatched several messages; their destinations being treated as closely guarded secrets. The Jarl of Morthal and her escort had returned home, but not before requesting that I visit and speak to her daughter.

My days began to resemble those of Aric’s daughters in their youth. Sword training, a bath, an hour of study, a walk about Whiterun, an hour assisting in the temple, an hour building arm strength while Adrianne instructed me in the most basic of armorer techniques.

“Trust his judgement” Adrianne said. “He has trained more swordsmen than even he can count.”

“You improve daily.” Amren said. “It is a pleasure to observe such progress.”

“I thank you, but credit must largely go to the potions that Aric provides me.” I answered.

“My potion only helps your muscles retain a memory of what they have learned.” Aric said as he and Jordis approached.

“Have you both come to observe my poor attempts to learn what each of you mastered before I was born?” I asked.

“Surely I do not look quite as old as that your Grace.” Jordis said.

“Forgive me, sister, I spoke in haste.” I answered.

“No,” Aric said, “we have come to participate in your lesson. My last few days have seen too much inactivity. It will do me good to move.”

“Do you both not wish to put on practice armor rather than the linen shirts you wear?” I asked.

The smile growing on Jordis’ face alerted me that I had misspoke again.

“We have not worn armor in practice for some years now.” She answered. 

“We were about to begin one-on-one drills, honored Thane.” Amren said. “It is good you brought your own opponent.”

We began our drills, the four of us stepping and striking according to the cadence that Amren called out; Aric and Jordis following the simple steps I was attempting to master, until we reached the end of the lesson, and the mock battle.

Amren had been true to his word and took the opportunity to strike back when it was presented.

“Forward is not always the best direction.” He said. “Passing step backwards, triangle step to the side. These are also options. You will learn to determine which is most appropriate for the moment.”

“I understand.” I said, rubbing the side of my head. Our mock battles had grown longer, but not much.

“That is enough. We must give the Thane his turn.”

What followed then between Aric and Jordis went on for some time and drew a fair number of spectators. It covered a great deal of ground, emerging at one point into the market square. No one could miss the smiles and laughs the opponents launched at each other.

“Brother, you disrupt commerce in my city.” Balgruuf said as he emerged from the crowd once the battle had concluded.

“Forgive me Jarl,” Aric said, “we lost all sense of location.”

“The men who delivered Bajald Eraldsen into our custody have returned. They await our pleasure, and their reward. If you will instruct me, I will inform Proventus of your decision.”

“If you will indulge us for a short time, we will meet these opportunists in person.” Aric said, “We would not wish their first impression of us to be based upon our current state.”

“The three of you bearing weapons and soaked with sweat would certainly make an impression.” Balgruuf said. 

“We will be as quick as possible.” Aric said.

Washed, though not completely dried, and dressed Aric and I met the men who presented us with the gift that currently resided in the dungeon beneath Dragon’s Reach.

We could almost have skipped our baths. They left much to be desired by way of appearance, though in fairness to them they had awaited our return in an open-air camp under a rocky outcropping north of Whiterun.

“Reverend Mother, honored Thane, these are the men who delivered Bajald Eraldsen, together with your charge and token, personally to me, not wishing to entrust their expected good fortune to the city guard.” Proventus said.

“Gentlemen,” Aric said, stretching the definition of that word to the point of breaking, “I apologize for your long wait. Your expedited delivery took us by surprise.”

The looks on their faces said all that was required.

“You delivered Ser Eraldsen quicker than we had expected.” I said.

“He was going to run Milord,” the taller of the two said to Aric. “If we had waited, he would have fled.”

“You have both read the charge?” Aric asked

“We heard it read, Milord.” The spokesman replied. “We know what’s in it.”

“You know that your employer hired assassins to kill an innocent woman? That their attempt on her life caused the death of her father?”

“Our former employer, Milord.” was the reply. “We knew nothing about it. We ain’t cutthroats. We ain’t saints, and old Eraldsen weren’t one neither, but we never took money for nothing like this here. These he hired special, and a scary lot they were.”

“Do any of the men he hired _‘special’_ remain?” Aric asked. 

“No Milord.” He answered, “the first ones left and never came back. Some of the last ones came back tied over their horses. There’s none left.”

“Give me the charge and the token.” Aric said.

“What about or reward?” the spokesman asked.

“Your reward will be four-hundred gold to share as you see fit between you.” Aric said to two suddenly very happy faces. “You have the word of the Thane of Whiterun. Give me the charge and the token, and tell me where to deliver your gold, and I will personally place it in your hands later today.”

“Did you believe them?” Lydia asked Aric.

“Their reaction when they saw Noxaura was no counterfeit.” Aric replied. “They did not recognize her.”

“And while I would not wish to associate with, they do not rise to the level of cold malevolence Railius and I saw in the first group, or the two that almost completed their mission later near my shack.” I said

“Neither do they resemble the brutes that comprised the last group.” Aric said. “I believe that they are not part of the group of hired assassins. But I also believe their admission that they are not saints. I will deliver their gold to them. I will take an associate that, the Divines willing, might help these two see that they should find employment that does not imperil their lives or their souls.”

“You will take Noxaura with you?” Lydia asked, the surprise clear on her face.

“No, not Noxaura.” Aric said, looking at Serana.

“Please tell me we do not leave before nightfall.” Serana said with a smile.

“I am not sure what I feel.” I said to Danica. “They seemed like any two men you might meet on a dock. Not assassins, not ruffians, not men who would plan and execute the death of someone they had never met.”

We sat under the Gildergreen, in the place that had become our usual location to talk and take our ease after treating the sick and injured.

“You have endured more trauma than most at your age.” She said, “It is understandable that you need more time to sort your feelings. Do not feel the need to rush. In this instance, at least, time is your ally.”

“Have you ever met Mother Hamal?” I asked with a smile.

“Mother Hamal and I nearly came to blows in our youth over the affections of a young warrior.” Danica said with a laugh. “Since we are on the topic of time, it took a fair amount of it for her and me to come to a place where we could love each other as sisters and not each see the other as a competitor.”

“You are blessed then.” I said.

“You will be so blessed as well.” She said, “be patient.”

“Is it so clear that everyone can see it?” I asked.

“Not everyone.” She said, as she grasped my hand, “only those of us who know how to look.”

“Good afternoon, Danica.” A warrior in scaled armor said to Danica. 

“Hail Companion.” Danica said with a smile.

“I have not had the pleasure of meeting your new Priestess.” The Companion said.

“She is on loan from the Divines.” Danica said “She assists me out of an overabundance of caring and goodwill. Noxaura, this is Ria, a member of the Companions, and our neighbor. Ria this is Noxaura, a Priestess of Cybele.”

My reaction to her name did not go unnoticed. 

“Do we know each other?” Ria asked me.

“No, Companion, though I know some of your brethren, the Thane of Whiterun being among that group.”

“If you know Aric, then it takes little effort to guess how my name became familiar to you.” Ria said.

“He has mentioned several names, Companion, of those members of your esteemed group that I had not had the honor of meeting.”

“You are very generous, Lady.” She answered. “The sins of my youth are many and various. I have learned to live with them, and I trust that I have learned from them.”

“A perspective we should all emulate, Companion.” I answered.

“Would you perhaps be the Reverend Mother that my twin brethren speak of when referring to their recent travels with our brother Companion and Thane?” she asked

“I had the pleasure of traveling with the twin Companions whom we joined in Rorikstead.” I said with a laugh, “It was on our account and the size of our party that they were forced to sleep in the stable in Rorikstead.”

“Never has such a small hamlet had so many visitors at once.” Ria said.

“We were returning two lost lambs.” I said, “And the village was afflicted by much sickness. The Thane delivered much need provisions and supplies, and a medicine chest that was much depleted when we departed.”

“You and Aric treated all their sick?” Danica asked.

“We did. They will all do well.” I said. “we left them the means to ensure that all would recover, though we promised to visit during the summer season. I also promised to marry a young couple if they are still as enamored then as they are now.”

“How wonderful!” Danica said. “Young love is so invigorating.” 

“They are certainly young.” I said. “They have each only seen seventeen winters. Can they really be so in love at that age? I was already in orders, and I cannot remember what most captured my heart when I was as old as they are now.”

“I was their age when I first met the Jarl’s daughters” Ria said, “and I can still recall the fire that burned in my heart. It was a warrior’s fire, and it did not always serve me well. Perhaps a lover’s fire will be kinder to these two.”

“My experience with such a fire is that it can burn with pleasure and pain in equal proportions.” I said.

“Patience, sister.” Danica said. “Patience.”

“You have been lost in thought all evening.” Lydia said to me. “Surely you are not worried for their safety.”

“No, it is not that.” I answered “My mind continues to cast back to how I could have possibly offended someone to the degree that they would seek my life. His name is not familiar to me. To my knowledge we have never met. Do you know anything of him?”

“He is a merchant. He owns a small shipping and import company. He operates in Skyrim through Solitude and Dawnstar, not trusting Ulfric enough to dock his vessels in Windhelm.” Lydia said.

“Why would a merchant hire assassins to kill me?” I asked 

“Is something amiss?” Lucia asked

“No.” Lydia said. “At least, nothing that was not already amiss earlier in the day.”

“Bajald Eraldsen.” I said. “he consumes too much of my thoughts.”

“It would be strange if it were otherwise.” Lucia said. “All those that sought my life did so on the battlefield, and while I did not always understand why, I at least had the satisfaction of sending them into Oblivion when they would have preferred the reverse. Never has anyone sent assassins to attack me.”

“It becomes more difficult each day that passes to resist the urge to walk into the dungeon and ask him plainly for his reasons.” I said.

“Then do not resist.” Lydia said. “You have every right to ask and are owed an answer. You need not wait for Tayen.”

“I would stand up this moment and present myself at the dungeon entrance and ask to speak with him, but I fear it is my impatience with this incessant waiting that drives me rather than reasoned consideration.” I said. 

“It is never good to simply sit and dwell in one’s misfortune.” Lucia said. 

“You two should walk a bit.” Lydia said. “It will help Noxaura calm her nerves. Take her to the Bannered Mare. A Bard from High Rock performs in Whiterun for several days. I am informed that he is very talented. And very attractive.” 

“Come then, Noxaura.” Lucia said with a grin. “It cannot hurt to listen and look.” 

“It is a game we play.” Jarl Balgruuf said, as we sat in a small private room in the rear of The Bannered Mare, “I pretend that my disguise is impenetrable, and they pretend to not recognize me.”

“Is it wise for you to be here without a guard?” I asked

“I am still able to defend myself if needed.” He replied, “In extremis, Uthgerd is never far away.”

“Uthgerd is that imposing Nord woman sitting in that corner, wearing plate armor and a grim expression?” I asked.

“Yes, she is worth a company of city troops.” He replied.

“Noxaura and I heard of the guest bard whose visage is as beautiful as his voice.” Lucia said, “and we wanted to see for ourselves.”

“He has a passable voice, but his face is nothing of note.” Balgruuf said.

“His face is most definitely of note.” Lucia whispered to me, “as is the rest of him.”

“I envy his complexion.” I whispered back truthfully.

“Your complexion is just as good.” Lucia replied, “And it has improved of late.”

“It is your father’s potions that I have to thank.” I said in as off handed a manner as I could manage.

The look on her face and her smile implied she thought otherwise.

“May I bring something for the two ladies?” the Redguard barmaid asked

“Cyrodilic brandy is just the thing to lift my friend’s spirits.” Lucia said.

“What oppresses your spirits, lady?” Balgruuf asked as the barmaid left.

“The guest in your dungeon.” I replied. “This waiting to hear his reasons is like a slow death to me.”

“You may speak to him whenever you wish, but he is a snake and will surely attempt to slither from your grasp. Even after his former employees directed us to where he buried the assassins you returned to him; he still maintains his innocence.”

“Will he ever admit the truth then?” I asked.

“He may, once he is informed that he has lost everything, and you have gained it. Part of it, at least.” Balgruuf said.

“I do not understand.” I said

“The Jarls of Solitude and Dawnstar were both informed of his actions against your person and how those actions caused the death of your father and imperiled the Thane and his family.” Balgruuf said. He paused as our drinks were delivered and continued once we were alone. 

“Elisif, Skald and I have all issued identical edicts. Bajald Eraldsen’s property in our three holds is seized. A certain portion is reserved as appanage to each of the three holds. The remainder by right belongs to you and the Thane as compensation, though the Thane has already stipulated that he wishes his portion to be set at nothing.”

“Courage, sister.” Lucia said as she grasped my hand, and all the blood left my face. “Drink your brandy and allow yourself a moment for your mind to adjust.”

“It is no small amount, to be sure.” Balgruuf said. “It is not all he owns, but it is all we can access, and it is still considerable. Your reaction is understandable.”

“Breath.” Lucia said as I drank from my cup and allowed the fire spread through my chest.

“All of his possessions, summed up and multiplied by one-hundred, are still not worth one hair on Railius’ head.” I said. “There is no amount I would not give to see him smile once more and hear him call me his _‘good girl’_.”

“Eraldsen’s own head is in jeopardy now.” Balgruuf said as Lucia stood and closed the door to our room so my tears could fall in private. “I am sorry that I cannot do something to ease your grief.”

“You are very kind, Jarl.” I said. “It seems I have brought you nothing but difficulty lately.”

“Difficulty does not visit Whiterun when it visits in the likeness of your Grace.” Balgruuf said. “Now, dry your eyes, good lady, and tell me of your father.”


	23. You are just a usurper

**7th of Rain’s Hand**

“Do not forget, we begin afternoon lessons today.” Amren said after our mock battle concluded our morning training session.

“I do remember” I replied. “It is fortunate that my extra breeches and tunics are delivered. I would dislike wearing damp clothing, even if freshly washed.”

“Proper, well-fitting attire is important, as you have already discovered.” He said, reminding me of my early misery when soft flesh repeatedly met hard leather. “When will Adrianne finish your full armor?”

“She estimated it would require two weeks.” I replied. “I visit ever three days for her to check the fit. She has a week left to meet her estimate.”

“What material does she use?” he asked.

“She requested a quantity of dragon hide from the Thane. She has chain and scale made from ebony, and some plate, though very little. And leather, of course, provided by Lydia.” I said.

I would take it as a great favor if you would allow me to see it once it is completed.” Amren said.

“You will have an opportunity, certainly.” I said. “Adrianne would never forgive me if I did not wear it for at least one lesson.”

“Does she also intend to make you a sword?” he asked.

“Aric promises me a sword.” I said. “He has an excellent collection. And it is a topic that can distract them for quite some time. ‘Try this one, Nox. How does it feel?’ they would ask repeatedly, while having disagreements whether the blade is too long or too short, one edge or two, guard type, pommel type. The discussion is not yet to the point where I am allowed an opinion.”

“You are fortunate to have the assistance of so many experts.” Amren said. “Many swordsmen are simply given whatever is at hand, regardless of length, type, or balance.”

“I am sure I will appreciate it in time. They converge on a final selection.” I said. “There are six swords lying on the table in the dining room. Aric and his advisors will select two of them, make what adjustments are necessary, and present me two legendary blades fit perfectly for my hand and arm.”

“I would also be grateful to see those as well.” Amren said, “However, given the rate at which you improve, perhaps it is best to omit those from our lessons.”

“You are too kind, master instructor” I said, “You will certainly never be in danger from me.”

“I must let you continue on to the rest of your day.” He said. “Until this afternoon.”

* * *

“Do not let him neglect the dagger” Serana said later, “it is equally as important.”

“He has listed it in his schedule of training.” I said. “It is far enough in the future that I doubt I will still be in Whiterun, but it is included with short sword training.”

“That is wise.” Lydia said. “There are subtle differences, and you do not know when you may need to fight with whatever is at hand.”

“I believe I will always choose magic as my primary weapon” I said, “but I requested training, and I am pleased that my instructor is so thorough.” 

“I see that you once again have full use of your dining room table.” I said to Lydia.

“Your final swords are selected.” Lydia said. “The single-handed dragon steel katana, and the elven curved sword. Aric and you must find time for him to make final measurements for each. Each are slightly shorter versions of their adult brethren and fit your arm and stature well. It will take a week to complete the adjustments. By then you will also have your armor.”

“He cannot waste a weeks’ time modifying swords for me.” I said, “It is too much to ask. He has many other matters of much greater importance.”

“He enjoys it.” Serana said. “And he hates waiting as much as you do. It will distract him until his messages bear fruit.”

“Surely the Thalmor cannot be idle this whole time.” I said.

“They have had serious losses, with no indication as to the source.” Lydia said. “News travels more slowly when stealth is necessary. It may not travel at all if there is no one left to bring it. All they will have is silence, dead troops, and no idea how to proceed. They may begin to distrust their clandestine Imperial allies, which can only benefit us.”

“There are enough eyes watching Skyrim now, looking for Thalmor troop movements.” Serana said. “There are not so many places they can land troops in strength. We have sufficient means to watch them all, as well as some that are not as well known.”

The door opened, and Runa came in.

“Tayen is here.” She said.

* * *

_“Blessed Mother, I wish to worship only thee._

_Guide me that I may walk in thy light and holiness to a deeper intimacy with thee._

_Make known to me the path of life._

_Fill me with joy in thy presence and allow me to bring joy into the lives of others._

_Allow me to dwell in thy temple until my life ends, when I may finally gaze upon thy beauty._

_Most Blessed and Divine Mother hear my voice when I call.”_

“That is a beautiful prayer.” Tayen said. 

“It is the ‘Prayer of Faith’” I said. “It has always been a comfort to me in my times of need.”

“I will be at your side.” Aric said. “You will never be alone with him.”

“We will be by your side.” Serana said. “I will not let you near this man otherwise.”

“Surely I am enough protection against one man who resides in a prison cell.” Aric said

“You may be adequate protection.” She replied. “But have I not also earned my place in this inquisition? But for me, you would not know the source of this evil.”

“I will rest easier in my mind if Serana is there to support me.” I said, “I thank you, sister.”

“Well,” Serana said, looking at Aric with triumph written clearly on her face, “that is settled.”

* * *

“He is a viper, Ahanu. His mind already builds a web of deceit. His heart is like flint.” Tayen said quietly as Bajald Eraldsen walked slowly to the bars that separated us.

“I order this inquisition to be opened, exercising my authority as Jarl of Whiterun, acting under proxy for the Jarl’s of Solitude and Morthal. Bajald Eraldsen, you are accused of ordering the murder of an innocent woman and of hiring assassins to carry out that murder. You are accused in the death of an innocent man. You are accused in the attempt on the life of the Thane of Whiterun, Haafingar, and Hjaalmarch and a member of his family.” Thane, you may begin.

Bajald Eraldsen clearly had not enjoyed his stay in the Dragon’s Reach dungeon. And Tayen’s description of him was accurate. His eyes darted back and forth to each of us. His look was not fearful, though. He was even yet calculating his chances of escape. What did not appear on his face was any recognition when he looked at me as I stood in my finery and my cloak.

“Do you recognize me, Ser?” Aric asked.

“We have never met, and I do not know you.” He answered.

“I was one of the travelers your assassins attacked.” Aric said. “I was the one who returned their remains to you, those that still retained sufficient remains to return. Remains, I am made to understand, that were buried a short distance from your residence just to the east of where you now stand.”

“You are mistaken. I hired no one.” He said.

“We have testimony from the two men who delivered you here.” Aric said. “We have testimony from one of the assassins. How do you think we knew where to send the remaining two?” Aric asked as Bajald Eraldsen’s face reacted to that news.

“This is no misguided child” Tayen said to Serana and me as we three kept to the read. “His heart is corrupted. I might force the truth from him, but I fear the force my attempt would require would burn the mind from him.”

“Fear is a strong motivator.” Serana said as she stepped forward.

“Honored Jarl, you know me well enough that my nature does not shock you.” Serana said to Balgruf.

“I know you to be a friend of my brother, and as such a friend to Whiterun.” Balgruf said.

“I ask your indulgence then.” Serana said as she stepped to the bars. “Ser Eraldsen, you do not seem interested in how we came to convince one of your assassins to confess to us.” She began to walk slowly to the nearest wall and extinguish the torch that was positioned there. Three torches remained, as she continued her slow walk. “Are you not at least curious?”

“As I said, I hired no one.” He replied.

“It was I that convinced him.” She said as another torch went out. Two left. “I admit that I was out of practice, and that is why only two of your employees were returned to you.” A single torch remained.

“I give you my word” she said, “As one of the last Daughters of Coldharbor, you will tell us every detail of your reasons why you attempted the life of my friend and sister.”

Bajald Eraldsen and Serana were now separated by a short distance, on opposite sides of the bars.

“Two of your assassins died quite badly.” She said. “I am told by members of our party that day that the screams and noises they made caused nightmares for some time. The assassin who confessed was one such. His first moments in death as he told all were much calmer that his last moments in life.”

“You speak of Necromancy!” he answered.

“Yes, sir, I do. So, you see you do not have to be alive to answer our questions.” She said, “However, the Thane has gone to a great deal of effort to bring a truthsayer to hear your interrogation, and it would be a pity if she traveled all this way and not be employed.”

The final torch suddenly went out. In the pitch darkness there was a sound like wings and rushing wind, followed by sounds of a scuffle. When all the torches flared again to life, Serana was inside the cell, her left hand holding Bajald Eraldsen’s neck where she had pinned him to the cell wall, his feet several inches from the floor.

“Shall I show you how two of your assassins died?” she asked as her eyes glowed and her lips parted and began to slowly approach his neck. “Let us demonstrate for the Jarl and this company the screams those assassins made as they slowly bled their lives away.”

One can calmly hear accounts of men gibbering with fear, the attending loss of control of bodily functions, hand clutching, feet kicking. Watching it occur a few feet away is entirely another affair. 

I was shaking from head to toe as Serana’s slightly opened mouth poised inches away from Bajald Eraldsen’s neck, as the screaming began.

“Decide now, once and for all, under what conditions you will answer our questions.” Aric said calmly.

* * *

“I had never met them before.” Eraldsen said. “They were described to me, and I was told where to look for them and when. That information was given to the men I hired.

The smell in the dungeon had not been pleasant when we arrived. It was much worse when Eraldsen chose to answer our questions while still in the land of the living.

“Do you recall the description of the woman, Sir?” I asked as I stepped forward.

He paused for a moment while he looked at me. “It was you.” He said.

“Yes, sir, it was me. And the man described to you was my father.” The shaking had not quite left me, which Balgruf did not fail to notice.

“A chair for the Reverend Mother.” Balgruf said. “She is still unsettled.”

Eraldsen looked up at those words. “Reverend Mother.” He said. “Catilia is Reverend Mother. You are just a usurper.”

“You know Catilia?” I asked him. “In what capacity?”

“Yes, I know her, and you are not her. You would put yourself in her place. You would usurp her right to host Potema. She always suspected you. She was high Priestess, it should have been her that Potema chose, not you.”

I would have collapsed if not for Aric, who was at my side as promised.

“I have you.” I heard him say through the dim fog that shrouded my mind. “I will never let you go.”

“Explain yourself sir” Balgruf said,

“Catilia was the rightful host for the Wolf Queen once she was reborn. Catilia was High Priestess. But she became aware that Potema chose another as host. This sad shell was to become Potema. Catilia would not allow that.”

“You are mistaken sir” I said, “Potema would be reborn in her previous form. She needed no host.”

“You demonstrate how unworthy you are.” He said. “You know nothing of the mysteries, Catilia herself told me as much.”

“That is why I was never allowed to learn the final mysteries.” I said to Aric.

“It appears that Catilia confided much to you.” Aric said. “How came you two to be so close?”

“She promised me priority in the new realm once Potema was again Queen of Solitude. Now the rebirth of Potema is at hand, Catilia will become Potema, her promise to me will be fulfilled.”

“When did you last speak to Catilia?” Aric asked, “And how is it a merchant knows where to hire assassins?”

“It was the Jarl of Falkreath who had the contacts I required. He made the introductions for a fee.” Eraldsen said. “I was not to contact Catilia again before the Wolf Queen’s return. Her return would herald my elevated estate. It will be then that I will join her in Solitude.”

“That is a reunion that you will surely miss.” Balgruf said.

“You dare not harm me.” He said, his gaze lingering on Serana “Potema herself would lay waste to Whiterun or any other city or hold that conspired against me.”

“Catilia is dead.” I said, “Potema’s rebirth is ended. Her remains are sanctified, her soul is at peace in Oblivion.”

“No.” he said. “No, a promise was made. I was promised a place.”

“A place you shall have.” Balgruf said as he walked out of the dungeon and returned with the headsman and four guards.

“Bajald Eraldsen you are found guilty of murder and of conspiracy to commit murder.” Balgruf said before turning to the headsman. “By my authority as Jarl of Whiterun, I order the death of this man.”

“Yes Milord.” The headsman said.

“You cannot do this.” The condemned man said. “I am a wealthy man.”

“You were a wealthy man.” Balgruf said, “and I assure you I have the authority to do this.”

“Take the death offered to you by the Jarl” Serana said, “It is much quicker than the one I offered you.”

* * *

“That was a thoroughly retched business.” Balgruf said as we sat in his private chamber. “It is good to have it settled, though I fear that you are still quite upset.”

The shaking came and went in waves. My life had been completely shattered by what I heard, my mind’s eye racing across each small piece, having no map to put them back together. When I spoke, I did not recognize my own voice.

“Who am I?” I asked, “What am I? For what purpose have I been given life? What is my destiny, and does it even belong to me? Was I only ever meant to be a shell for Potema?”

“I confess that these are matters that are beyond me.” Balgruf said. “But as to the question of who you are, I can answer with all truthfulness that you are the Reverend Mother Noxaura to whom I was recently introduced, the woman of whom the Thane and I spoke those few months ago when I first became familiar with your ordeal. I heard nothing today that causes me to change my opinion.”

“You have known that long, who I was.” I said.

“My brother is a good judge of men.” Balgruf said before smiling at Aric, “and of women. I knew your history, certainly. It was only recently that I came to know you as a person. And I do not flatter myself overmuch by saying that I am also a good judge of men, and of women.”

“It is natural after such a shock to doubt yourself.” Tayen said. “I will tell you that I see no evil in you and no hardness that may conceal it. You are as many women in Ahanu’s life. It is a common trait you all share; a glowing soul, filled with kindness, and strength and courage.”

“I do not feel the least bit strong or courageous now.” I said. “I fear that this shaking will never end.”

“It is your body’s reaction to a great shock.” Aric said. “It is entirely natural. But if you will allow me, I will help you.”

I nodded my consent. He placed a hand on my face, and another on my waist as he cast a calming spell that wrapped us both in a warm shroud, and my heart rate began to slow as my shaking subsided. His face was inches from mine, his gaze held mine. It was not a conscious thought that brought my lips to his, as relief flooded my body, all my previous tension pouring out in one passionate kiss.

“I believe your spell is too overgenerous in its effect, Ahanu.” Tayen said.

“Her shaking has subsided.” Serana said, “mostly.”

“Ladies allow me to show you the excellent view from the upper balcony of Dragon’s Reach. These two have already seen it, and it holds little interest to them.” Balgruf said before looking at Tayen in a manner with which I was already well acquainted. “Madam, I do not believe I have had the pleasure of making your acquaintance.”


	24. Divine heritage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A Blank page is not a writer's friend. This chapter is certainly not the first time I have discovered this. I had no idea how to start. But I happened to be listening to a song on You Tube while staring at my computer, and I thought "This is beautiful." The song was Widow's Lament by Daniel Ran. And then I knew how I would start Chapter 24. For those of you who are interested in the song that the bard from High Rock plays for Aric and Noxaura, it can be found here:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6J-7hcDa8Y

9th of Rain’s Hand

“This is beautiful” I said, “What is it called?”

“Widow’s Lament” Aric said, “it is his own composition. I admit that it made me weep the first time I heard him play it.”

“I have never known a man like you.” I said. Never in history were truer words spoken.

“I am just a man.” He replied “I have the same emotions that the Gods provide us all. They are gifts, as our senses are. Do we not then, when our senses lead us to joy, and our joy leads us to tears, honor the Divines that gave us all these gifts?”

“You speak masterfully.” I said. 

“He will depart Whiterun tomorrow.” Aric said. “I am glad we could arrange this private audience.”

It was, perhaps, too large a space for his talents and his Lute to be on full display, but we sat close enough that even the softest notes echoed in my heart, and my own tears were never far away.

* * *

Tayen departed Whiterun yesterday. Bajald Eraldsen departed life the day before. My mind had recovered from its initial shock, though not in time for my first afternoon lesson with Amren. Lydia sent a note to his home telling him simply that I was ‘indisposed’. ‘If the implication eludes him his wife will explain.’ Lydia said.

* * *

I was spared the anguish if explanations upon returning to Aric’s house after the inquisition was concluded. Aric brought me downstairs and helped me into bed before being ushered away by Lydia and Lucia. Information was passed in some manner that I did not notice as I lay curled up in my bed. The remainder of that terrible day was one of quiet, and tender care, and soft reassuring words from my care takers. Danica visited briefly; Gods only know what she was told. Others whose voices I did not recognize, but some voices that I knew also could be heard. Vilkas asking Lucia “What can I do?” and her reply. “Nothing. Those responsible are dead or soon will be. She needs love and support now.” Balgruf saying to someone “Anything you may require. Do not hesitate to ask.” Runa asking, “What about Siddgeir?” and Aric’s blunt reply “I am for Siddgeir.”

“What must they all think?” I asked myself. What version of the truth did they know? Would I find Whiterun a different city the next time I stepped outside?

The answer came yesterday when I appeared for my morning lesson, to be greeted by concern for my health, relief at my recovery, and a somewhat modified routine to accommodate my convalescence. Danica showed no hesitation and only asked if I was well, but hugged me as a mother would, and kissed my forehead, and said “Never forget those that love you and would do anything for your happiness.”

“Adrianne requests another fitting when you are available” Aric said, “and I am ready to make the final adjustments on your swords if you have time in your very busy schedule for another set of measurements.”

“Who is Mato?” I asked Aric as we walked back from Adrianne’s fitting. “Tayen mentioned his name.”

“Mato was her husband.” Aric said. “He was a great hunter. He was killed by a bear several years ago. She morns him still. She dances the Nanissáanah, the Ghost Dance, on the Day of the Dead, with his spirit and the spirits of her parents.” 

“That is very sad.” I said. 

“Yes.” Aric said “They were a match that I believed the Gods had preordained would be together forever. Lucia and Vilkas remind me of them.”

“Do you say, then, that you believe that Lucia and Vilkas are also preordained to be together forever?” I asked him

“I have believed that for many years.” He said. 

“They do seem well matched.” I said.

“He spoke to me about what he observed at the watch tower.” Aric said. “He asked me if it was possible that Lucia had divine heritage.”

I was about to laugh, but his expression held something close to concern.

“Does she?” I asked, “Is it even possible? Can men share heritage with the Divines?”

“Would you think of her differently if it were true?” he asked? “Would you treat her differently?”

“Gods” I said, “It is true, then.”

“It is true” he said, “but not of her.”

I did not swoon, but one moment were walking, and the next he was holding me in his arms and Amren was addressing us.

“We too hastily resumed our lessons after her recent illness.” Amren was saying, “It is my fault that she has taken poorly again.”

“It is not your fault Amren” Aric replied. “It is a brief spell only. She will recover soon enough.”

“I apologize gentlemen.” I said unsteadily, “It is hunger only. I will be well again once I eat something.”

“You have had too many shocks in too short a time.” Aric said later, “I should have held my tongue.”

“I suspected for some time.” I said. “Not the details certainly, but the general fact. But it is one thing to suspect, and another to have those suspicions confirmed.”

“I fear now what I will see in your eyes when you look at me. That when I reach for you that you will pull away.” He said.

“There is no force of Men or Gods that can tear me from your side.” I said. “You have my heart. I gave it freely, always suspecting what you confirm. It is not your heritage I doubt, but my own, as well as my destiny.”

“Then let us appoint a time when we can be alone, and we can discuss all.” Aric said. “I know a place we shall not be disturbed.”

* * *

“You play masterfully Sir.” I said to the visiting bard. “Please, tell me your name again.”

“Deniel Rane, Milady.” He replied with a smile that could melt a Medusa’s heart. “You are very kind. Thank you.”

“You must be careful, sir or the ladies of Skyrim will never allow you to return to High Rock.” I said.

“You are much too kind, Milady.” He answered. “The men of High Rock would certainly treat you so. Have you ever visited High Rock?”

“I have not had the pleasure sir.” I answered. 

“And you, honored Thane?” he asked Aric

“I was born in High Rock, sir.” He answered. “It is the land of my youth, the Western Highlands.”

“We are countrymen then, sir.” The bard answered.

“I was younger than you are now when I saw it last.” Aric said

“You must return then sir,” Deniel replied, “and retrace the paths of your youth.”

“One day, perhaps, when the world is more settled.” Aric said.

The bard departed; his private concert concluded. Aric and I sat on the balcony at the top of Dragon’s Reach enjoying the afternoon light as it painted the landscape.

“It seems odd” I said, “that all it required for me to learn something of your past was a visit from a traveling bard.”

“I do not often speak of my past.” He said. “It is not that I avoid it, but that I seem to have lost the skill. There is too much that must be omitted.”

“Such as your heritage.” I said.

“Yes.” He said. “Such as my heritage.”

“Will you finally tell me something of it, or will you let my imagination run rampant?”

“How much do you know of Saint Alessia?” he asked

“I know nothing of her.” I said. “My education is sorely lacking in many areas.”

“In the first era there was a Nedic woman named Alessia who prayed to the Divines for aid in throwing off the Elves that had enslaved her people. Kyne heard her prayers and sent her son Morihaus to aid her. Akatosh also intercede and gave Alessia the Amulet of Kings and blessed her with the blood of dragons. Kyne also sent Alessia visions to aid her in the fight against her slave masters. She also gave Alessia the Thuum.”

“Morihaus and Alessia became lovers and had a daughter. Their bloodline continued into the third era when a descendant of theirs bore a daughter sired by a powerful mage name Belrud who was descended from the Atmorans and who the legends say was inhabited by Magnus at the time he sired his daughter. “

“Magnus?” I asked

“Also known as the God of Magic.” Aric said. “And so, their issue multiplied and spread, like leaves on the wind, until one leaf finally came to rest in the Western Highlands of High Rock. That leaf was my mother, also named Alessia, who met and married my Father Heimdall.”

It took my mind a moment to encompass what I had just heard.

“You are descended from two Gods.” I said.

“It would appear so.” He answered. “It is how I come to be Dragon Born, it is how I come to possess the Thuum. The gift of Sight that Kyne gave the original Alessia persists in my mother. It is how I speak a language that has not been heard outside Atmora since Ysgramor crossed the Sea of Ghosts, landed on the northern tip of Skyrim and built Saarthal.”

It was too much to take in. My mind would not settle on one item. My voice seemed to act on its own.

“Kynareth herself.” I said.

“Please look at me.” He said.

I realized that I had been staring into the distance as my mind fought to contain what I had just heard.

Our eyes met. He rarely showed the level of concern he showed me now. He was completely open. A wrong word or action would wound him deeply, past any healing.

His eyes were the same eyes I loved. His face was the same face I loved. His frame, that had brought me so much pleasure, was the same frame that I loved. 

I place my hand on the side of his face and let my fingers trace the line of his jaw, traveling from one side to the other; watching my fingers where the touched his flesh, until finally I transferred my gaze to his beautiful eyes which I kissed, one after the other, until his lips called out for their turn.

“Did you think I would run from you, sir, after your history recital was concluded?” I asked.

“I have not yet told all.” He said.

“What else, then?” I asked.

“It was not only to High Rock that the winds of history sent leaves.” He said.

“Where else?” I asked.

“Nibenay.” He said.

“Nibenay.” I said, my heart beating faster and my breath keeping pace, “my birthplace.”

“Nibenay became a haven for the Nedic people, many settled there, and multiplied. It is to this day still considered the most traditionally Nedic area of Tamriel.” He said, “The Nibenese people are thought to be the closest thing to purebred Nedes”

“What are you saying?” I asked

“That I am not the only one who may trace my linage back to Kyne.” He said.

“No,” I said, “it is too much. How can this be? How can we both share heritage with Alessia, with the first of her name, and with the son of Kyne? This is beyond all reason.”

“Is it?” he asked “You mother also had visions. She called them dreams, but she could see things that had not yet come to pass. Pevel had dreams as well, dreams that led her to your mother, and to you. It was no short journey she took from Bruma to find you. It was not happenstance.”

“Pevel was a Priestess of Cybele.” I said, “Would Kynareth not chose a Priestess of her own?”

“Kyne is worshiped under many names in many cultures.” He said, “We cannot say by what name any Goddess may be known. Kyne is known as the Mother of Men.”

“Cybele is known as the Mother Goddess.” I said. Gods, could this be true?

“This is madness.” I said, “the likelihood that two children of Kyne, across an entire continent and all the ages, would find each other is…” It took a moment to finally resolve the truth in my mind “…infinitesimal.”

“I have been mistaken about every important aspect of this.” Aric said. “It was not Potema that brought us together. It was Kynareth.”

“But you said yourself that each of us bore a shadow of Potema.” I said.

“Yes, and I have yet one more piece of this puzzle to share before I move to conjecture.”

“The Thalmor’s secret plans are child’s play by comparison.” I said.

“We are in agreement on that point.” He said. 

“Your puzzle piece?” I asked

“I have never shared any detail of what occurred in the cave that day.” He said.

“I thank you for that.” I said. “I have no interest in hearing the last moments of my friend’s lives described. Not even Catilia’s end, even after all she did.”

“It may interest you to know, at the very least, that it was not I, or anyone who accompanied me that day that killed Catilia.” He said. “Assuming that it was Catilia performing the ritual.”

“I do not understand.” I said, “It was most certainly Catilia performing the ritual. No one else would have dared or been allowed.”

“It was Potema who killed Catilia.” He said. “we had not yet reached the platform where they were conducting the ritual.

Any parts of my previous life that had not already crumbled into dust disintegrated in that moment.

“Gods.” Was all I could manage to say.

“You will recall that I mentioned that it was not just a summoning, but also a binding that Catilia was attempting, and that both failed. It was always foolishness to attempt to bind Potema, but it was the only way Catilia could have acted as host. Potema had chosen you as host. She made that choice quite some time ago, long enough ago for Catilia to form her plan before putting all the pieces in place to remove you as an rival. That means that Potema was already present in some form in that cave, present enough to select you, and to plant a seed of herself within you, and present enough to inform Catilia of her choice. And once the summoning was advanced, present enough to kill Catilia and the others performing the ritual once Catilia’s deception was revealed. Present enough to select me and plant a seed in me as the only remaining choice for host; the only remaining choice for host with a bloodline tracing back to one of the Divines. That is why you were chosen, your divine heritage.”

I refused to let the shaking take hold of me this time. It took several minutes and several recitations of the Prayer of Faith.

“Catilia sent me away on a pointless mission as part of her plan to end my life, and inadvertently saved me from whatever walking death awaited me as Potema’s puppet.” I said.

“It appears so.” He said. “I am no expert on Divine Intervention. It is possible that all of what transpired was some type of divine Shaping. But Kynareth would not have chosen a path for your salvation that involved so much death, certainly not the death of your father. What is certain is that Potema’s plans crumbled due to your absence. She sensed my divine heritage and thought she could simply substitute me for you. But she either did not recognize my dual heritage or underestimated it. That proved to be her undoing. She was very powerful. We barely survived the catacombs. She was within a hair’s breadth of succeeding. But she failed. The Wolf Queen is ended. Her plans for you are ended. You are safe from her.”

“What of the seeds she planted?” I asked. “Seeds we each bear?”

“As to those, we may have to consult.” Aric replied. “But we can both rest in the assurance that Tayen saw nothing of alarm in either of us. She has known you only a short time, but she has known me for half of my life. She knows me as I was before Potema intruded, and she has seen into me afterward. Nothing of any importance would escape her gaze. We are both of us safe from Potema’s clutches. And, speaking plainly, Hamal would never have let you leave Markath alive if you had not passed her test.”

She had been testing me. I had been in danger and never realized it. I took an odd comfort in the thought that she would have killed me if she had sensed a threat within me.

“Everything that has happened to me these last few months, everything I have seen, everything I have heard, everything you describe, it leads me to one obvious conclusion: I should not be allowed outdoors without supervision.”

It was the first laughter we had shared in some time.


	25. Bless your daughter Noxaura

11th of Rain’s Hand

“I do apologize most sincerely” I said, “It was the weather foremost in my mind, and it is the only cloak I possess. I did not consider what could occur.”

“It is only a practice sword.” Amren said. “It is of little value and I have many. Let us walk to my home and I will retrieve another.”

Clouds, rain, and distant thunder were the order of the day. But sword practice must not give way to poor weather, and I arrived on time for my lesson, wearing my cloak as protection against the elements. It was during our strike and parry drills that my parry failed me and Amren struck my cloak where it covered my shoulder, shattering his practice sword.

“Did you never think to wear a robe of such material rather than armor?” Amren asked me as we walked.

“I did.” I answered. “But neither the Thane nor anyone in his household chooses that option. When I asked him, he said ‘The added mass from the armor will absorb some of the force of any blow that lands. The material from which the cloak is made will not.’ But he has promised to enchant my armor as well.”

“You are home early.” I woman said as we entered Amren’s home.

“I must retrieve another practice sword, and also a cloak for my student that does not destroy weapons.” Amren said. “Noxaura, this is my wife Saffir. Saffir, this is my student the Reverend Mother Noxaura.”

“It is my pleasure lady.” I said. “What a beautiful little girl. Is this your daughter?”

“This is my granddaughter, your Grace; my own daughter Braith occasionally assists her husband Lars on his family’s farm, allowing me time to read to my little sweet.” She replied.

“What do you read to her?” I asked.

“Almost anything.” She replied as she smiled and spoke to her granddaughter, “She is not picky.”

“My wife is a great lover of books.” Amren said as he returned with a cloak and another practice sword.

“In that, we are of one mind, good Lady.” I replied. “I avail myself of the excellent library that the Thane maintains in his home. All his homes have excellent libraries. What is her name?”

“Her name is Niha.” Saffir said. “It was Amren’s mother’s name.”

“Thank you for allowing me to visit your home.” I said. “I hope when next we meet it will not involve quite so much dripping on your spotless floor.”

“If you will part with your own cloak for a short time, we will deviate from our usual training for the remainder of this morning’s lesson.” Amren said. “You may retrieve your cloak at the end of our lesson.”

The remainder of our lesson, which ran over our usual time somewhat, was spent in a running battle. We took advantage of the lack of traffic resulting from the weather, using every available foot of roadway, street, footpath and step; a prolonged mock battle that ranged much of the length of Whiterun, and required me to employ every skill that Amren and I had practiced.

“You are so much improved that I would almost not believe it if I had not been present for every step of the journey.” Amren said. “And, before you deflect my praise with a recommendation of the Thane’s potions, I will tell you that you are not the first student of mine to use them, and I know that they are no substitute for skill and intellect.”

“You will make me blush, master instructor.” I said. “I will hold my praise of the Thane’s potions, but I will do no such thing regarding how highly I value your skill as a teacher.”

“You are too kind, your Grace.” He said. “Come, we will retrieve your cloak.”

“As to that, may I ask a favor?” I asked him.

It was not until after I had existed my bath and dressed that I heard from upstairs that my favor had been granted.

“I have returned your cloak, your Grace.” Saffir said as Lydia and Lucia cooed over Niha, who was currently nested in Lucia’s arms, inspecting Lucia’s hair.

“Thank you, Lady.” I answered. “I was even more waterlogged at the conclusion of my lesson than when I borrowed this cloak, which I will exchange for the one you brought. May I give you this small bundle of pastries in payment?”

“You are too generous, your Grace.” She said.

“Please call me Noxaura, Lady.” I said. 

“If you will call me Saffir.” She replied.

“How are Braith and Lars?” Lucia asked her.

“They are well.” She answered. “They fight as much as ever they did. Their last bought of fighting led to this small bundle of arms and legs, so Niha may have a brother of sister next winter.”

“How wonderful, Saffir.” Lydia said. “I am so happy for you.”

“Please send the two of them our regards.” Lucia said. ‘Whiterun should always be filled with children running in the streets, laughing and playing.”

“Braith would agree.” She said, “though she would remind you that it is also the duty of others to provide some of those children as well.”

We all laughed in unison, but Lucia had a look that did not go unnoticed by Lydia or me.

* * *

“Come, we will walk to the Skyforge and let it take us under its wing.” Danica said, “Eorlund will not mind. He may moan, and complain, but he secretly likes the company.”

“Erorn and I watched you and Amren as you chased each other across Whiterun.” the giant blacksmith said.

“You have improved a great deal.” said a younger version of the blacksmith. “has she not Father?”

“Indeed.” He said, “Does the Thane intend to make you a sword?”

“He has two selected that he will modify to fit my hand and my arm.” I said. “A dragon-steel katana and a curved elven single edged sword.”

“Tell the Thane and Companion that the Skyforge is at his disposal.” The elder giant said.

“He does not recognize me as the poor Priestess who visited his forge with her father months ago.” I said. “I barely recognize myself. Nothing of that life that I claimed as my own survived that journey. But, then again, nothing of that life was real, except for Railius.”

“You retain more than you know.” Danica said, “you are the same woman as you were then. Everything about you that is important is unchanged. Life may appear unfamiliar to you now, but that is only because your perspective has shifted. Allow yourself time to grow accustomed. You will begin to recognize familiar landmarks.”

“You continue to amaze me with your wisdom and insight.” I said to her. “I am fortunate to know you.”

“Each of us lives a life we do not fully understand.” She said, “I am no different in that respect. And while fortune may play a part, the Divines also help us by placing kindred spirits in our paths for us to discover. Some brothers and sisters are born to us, others we discover along our life’s path. You and I are such sisters.”

“will you truly make me cry in front of these giant blacksmiths?” I asked her, as I wiped my eyes on my sleeve. 

“The Divines have blessed you with much more than just me” she said, “it is something to remember when clouds gather.”

“Your friendship is beyond value to me, particularly now, when my mind is in such turmoil that I must resort to potions if I am to sleep at night.”

“I am sorry sister; I had thought that you were somewhat recovered from that awful experience in the dungeon.” She said.

“It is not only that” I said, “Every day seems to bring new revelations. I feel like a piece of metal, struck repeatedly between the anvil and the hammer.”

“May I be of assistance to you?” she asked.

“You know that there are few whose advise I value as much as yours.” I said. “Railius and I talked once about fighting battles and fear, how one feels fear before battle, given time for imagination and contemplation, but that during a battle there is no time or capacity for anything except the opponent in front of you.”

“I have not been in battle.” Danica said, “though I have too often seen the results.”

“These repeated hammer blows, falling daily, have me fearful of the dawn.” I said, “I fear what new revelations the day will bring. What new part of my previous life will be shattered, or exposed as false, between sunrise and sunset. It is as if I fear a battle that is almost upon me. It is a constant anxiety.”

“You have had far too much trauma in far too short a time.” Danica said, “most go through life never having to endure even a portion of what you have survived.”

Worst yet is that he can see the fear in my eyes when he is about to speak to me. He can see clearly that I fear what he is about to say, that I fear it is another revelation about my life. We have barely spoken since his last lightening bolt left me almost senseless. My fear is responsible for this distance between us. I swore that neither Man nor Gods could take me from his side, yet I accomplished that task on my own. He opened himself to me and I have hurt him. I feel thoroughly retched.”

“You will not always feel so.” She said, “Your fear will slowly fade. You will become more yourself. The distance between you will disappear. Give yourself time. And rely on those who love you. Allow them to demonstrate their love, and demonstrate yours in return, by allowing them to help you.”

“You are so wise and kind.” I said, “the very model of a Priestess. I should put off my religious robes and wear sack cloth. It is not right that I should also be called Priestess, it diminishes the title you so rightly deserve.”

“Come now, friend, do not surrender to despair. It is understandable that you feel low. But do not place me on a pedestal that I do not deserve. I have all the usual vices in addition to those that I have manufactured for myself. But for the decade-and-a-half longer that I have lived we are much of a kind; and have more in common than you may realize.”

“In what way, friend?” I asked.

“You are not the first to be struck by a revelation courtesy of our attractive Thane.” She answered.

“I apologize” I began to say before my senses began to dim.

“Erorn!” I heard her call as if she were receding from me, “Help me!”

* * *

“Shhhh, do not stir. You are safe.”

I was lying on one of the beds in the temple. Danica sat on the edge of the bed.

“Forgive me” I said, “I seem to be prone to fainting lately.”

“It is my fault.” She said, “I did not realize how delicate a state you were in. I meant only to show solidarity, and I only added to your anxiety.”

“How much do you know?” I asked.

“I know a great deal about a great many things, but I believe you have a particular subject in mind.” She said.

“How much do you know about me?” I asked plainly.

That seemed to catch her off guard.

“I assumed your subject was Aric.” She said.

“On that subject I assumed that you knew all.” I said.

“On the subject of Aric, I know much.” She said. “If the subject is you, I know somewhat less. Does my knowledge concern you?”

“If it is to cost me a friendship that I hold most dear, the answer is yes.” I said.

She smiled slightly as she smoothed my hair. “Aric spoke to me when you first came to Whiterun in his company those few months ago. He spoke to the Jarl as well. Secrets and half-truths do not serve friends well in these cases, and the Jarl and I both call Aric friend, among other things. We know how you came to be in his company. We know what you have endured, and what you have lost. We know what binds the two of you to one another.”

“You knew when first we met to what order I belonged?” I asked. “And you still greeted me as a sister Priestess.?” 

“Aric spoke highly of you at that time.” She said, “And your first act upon meeting me was to offer your assistance and treat sick and wounded that you did not know and to whom you bore no obligation. Your efforts in Rorikstead only confirmed what I knew from the hour we met. That I would call you friend and sister, and love you as both, that I did not foresee, but it is not surprising, knowing you as I do now.

“Forgive me, I am not usually so prone to tears.” I said, “I began to cry when Railius died, and I have not stopped since then.”

“Your life has been severely unsettled.” She said “It is entirely understandable. What you most need is rest and care and love, though you always seem in better spirits after your sessions with Amren.”

I gave a short laugh. “Do not underestimate the affect that striking someone with a sword can have on one’s mood.”

“That explains why you smile so often during your lessons.” She said.

“Do I smile?” I asked

“A good deal.” She said with a laugh of her own.

“It is during my lessons that I feel least like a victim.” I said.

“That is also understandable.” She replied.

“Do you believe what Aric says to be true?”

“In what respect?” she asked.

“That we are both of us descended from the son of Kyne.” I said.

I knew it was a mistake immediately from the expression on her face. She had not known.

“You said you knew what bound us together.” I almost whispered.

She was as still as a statue. “I was referring to Potema. He said you each bore her mark.”

“He has mentioned nothing to you since then?” I asked.

“No.” she said.

“But you already knew his heritage.” I said.

“yes.” She answered. “He believes you are both descended from Morihaus.” She said.

“Yes.” I replied.

“That is the revelation that has struck you so deeply.” She answered.

“Yes. He believes it was Kynareth that guided us together, not Potema. He believes that Cybele and Kyne are one. He believes that it was not happenstance that Potema chose me and then, after I was no longer available, chose him. She was seeking a host with divine heritage.”

“Blessed Mother.” She said. “Divine Kynareth bless this temple built in thy name and dedicated to thee. Bless your daughter Noxaura, this child of your blood, who heals the sick and injured in the temple of her Divine Mother. Bless all those who her hand has touched.” 

I sat up and hugged her and placed my head on her shoulder as she prayed.

* * *

“The College is fortunate to have such an Archmage” I said to Runa. “His spells have an elegance I have never seen until now.”

“Do you refer to the spell or the writing?” Runa asked.

“Both.” I laughed. “His writing is excellent.”

“He does not share these tomes.” She said. “These are reserved for our family.”

“I did not mean to trespass” I said as I closed the book I was reading. “I beg your pardon.”

“Open the book again.” She said, “and be at ease. For good or ill you are past the point of denying that you are a member of this family.”

“I do not know how to respond to such an honor.” I said truthfully.

“Then may I suggest as a start that you begin to rebuild some of your former composure. You have endured much and are due a reasonable time for recovery. There is strength in you, we have all seen it. We only wish to see it again, sister.”

“We do not spend enough time together, sister.” I said. “We should correct that as well.”

“I understand your new armor will be completed tomorrow.” Runa said. “I would be honored if you allowed me to be the first to mar it’s pristine appearance.”

“So long as it is only my armor you mar.” I said. “Aric said he would add his enchantments as well.”

“He departed this morning, before anyone had risen.” She said. “Only Serana accompanied him. Jordis and Mother keep their own council. It is in the nature of housecarls to band together against all comers, but they are closed lipped even amongst us, except that if anyone asks, business matters keep Father sequestered in his study, amidst a mass of paper.”

Adrianne confirmed during my daily session at the forge that my armor would indeed be ready the next day.

The afternoon lesson resembled the mornings, ranging through the streets and alleyways, across all types of footing and terrain. It was only in the bath later that I was aware of the absence of pain. I could not recall clearly when my muscles had ceased their complaining. I could also not recall clearly when my dresses had become loose in places. And I would need an ointment for my hands if they were not to ultimately resemble Adrianne’s.

Afternoon became evening, which became night, and Aric and Serana still did not return. The house was uncommonly quiet. No one asked when to expect their return. 


	26. The Sword Dancer

**12th of Rain’s Hand**

“No one in Whiterun would dare alter these dresses” Lydia said, “Lest the bare the wrath of the sisters of Solitude. A ribbon will serve to gather it around your waist. But perhaps it would be best to lay them aside for the time. Breeches and tunic will do well enough in Whiterun and can be covered with a simple robe.”

“I will ask Danica if she will lend me one.” I answered.

The warmth of the sun had returned this morning, but Aric and Serana had not. The topic was avoided, and the household routine continued as it had for the past weeks. Our morning training relocated to outside the city walls so we could continue our wandering lesson, and to visit the stable.

“Her grace will require a horse and saddle for training.” Amren said to Jervar, the stable master. “once her armor is delivered, she will train how to sit properly with its increased weight and maintain her seat while cantering and galloping.”

“Shorter stirrups will be in order, then.” Jervar said. “Can you saddle a horse, your Grace, and have you ever mounted a horse while wearing armor?” he asked.

“No sir, I must admit to total ignorance of both.” I said.

“Well, for the mounting we must wait, but if you return at the conclusion of your lesson, we can begin your education of horse and saddle.” He replied.

* * *

Our sword training had seemed to reach its conclusion, but this morning there was an addition. That addition stood nearby and took the form of a dark elf.

“Your left hand and arm have progressed quite well.” Arman said, “But we have until now only trained one at a time. This is Jenassa, who has agreed to assist us for a short time today. She is a master at fighting with two swords. She will be your partner so that I may observe you.”

“Thank you, good Lady, for your assistance.” I said, “Amren knows this, but I feel I should mention that I have not yet attempted two swords at once, excepting bound swords.”

“I understand.” Jenassa said, “You have certainly already discovered that a weapon with weight requires much more control and strength. Amren has told me that you have made much progress with both. But for our first attempt, let us keep to what you familiar with. Your bound swords will persist long enough for Amren to observe your form. Beginning with our second lesson we will use actual swords.”

I had not used my rings or cast a bound weapon spell since the battle at the watch tower. Before my life changed so abruptly, I had rarely needed to resort to any weapon. My mind and body had spent the past two weeks adjusting to a physical weapon. When I triggered my rings and took my guard the lack of weight was evident, but I was not prepared for how my arms seemed to fly on their own, the quickness of my strikes and parries as much a surprise to me as to Jenassa. The quickness seemed to flow through my entire body, my feet flying through the steps that they had learned. Jenassa was a master, and she was certainly holding back her true strength and speed. I felt a joy that brought a laugh from my mouth as the two of us performed our dance together. 

I stepped back as I felt my spells about to end. My swords faded, faint blue beads of energy flickering before going out marking the very end.

“Thank you, Sera.” I said. “That was quite exhilarating.”

Jenassa’s expression was wary. She had not yet sheathed her swords. It was only then that I noticed she had been using edged steel instead of practice swords.

“Where did you train?” she asked, her weapons still drawn, and her eyes boring into me.

“Aside from lessons from my father, this excellent instructor who approaches us is responsible or all my training.” I said as Amren joined us.

“Your father was a sword dancer?” Jenassa asked.

My laughter was more than enough of an answer “No, my farther was a former sergeant in the Imperial Legion. You will forgive me if I admit that I do not know what a sword dancer is.”

“Lady” Jenassa said, “I believe that you are a sword dancer.”

“You certainly benefit from the lack of sword weight.” Amren said, “both in your arm and in your balance and footwork. I see clearly where your training will eventually take you once your strength compensates.”

“You are both much too generous.” I said, “though I admit I felt the benefit of the lack of sword weight, and the need to compensate.”

“Lady” Jenassa said, “at this rate you will be a living weapon.”

“No, good warrior, I will be a Priestess who is less in need of someone else’s protection.” I said, “that is all I desire.”

* * *

“I was not aware that so much knowledge of horses was required in order to saddle one properly.” I said to Danica later, “I feel quite remiss now, thinking of the number of times in our journeys that someone else accomplished that task for me.”

“In your defense, you have dedicated your life to the study of other skills.” Danica said, “I have known more than one skilled warrior and rider that would starve were it not for the assistance of a cook.”

I was anxious how I would be received after the events of the previous day, but my concerns were not necessary. Danica’s greeting today was unchanged for the most part. Her smile as she grasped my hands was warmer, but it seemed that our friendship had survived intact. She was quite happy to lend me a robe.

“The changes in your figure have not gone unnoticed.” She said. “Some concern was expressed for your health. Some offers of meals, cooked, and brought to you here or at your home. You would think from their concern that you live in poverty.”

“Their concern would vanish if they witnessed my ravenous nature after my lessons.” I said.

“Other aspects of your appearance also do not go unnoticed.” She said. “More than one member of the city guard has presented himself with a vague malady and asks for you by name.”

“They flatter me.” I said, “I am the dimmest of stars in the morning sky and you are the sun itself on the brightest of days.”

“Now who is the flatterer” she began, just as the temple door opened and wounded guards began to appear, assisted by their brethren.

“What has happened?” Danica asked a man who was helping a wounded guard.

“The Thalmor have misplaced some of their men.” He began as my heart began to sink. “They asked at the watch tower and we told them about the bandit attack that day at the watch tower, and how bandits liked to use the fort to ambush travelers. They went and stuck their noses in there and got bit as their reward.”

“How came your brethren to be wounded?” I asked

“The sergeant told them they was too few of them to risk the fort. It was just them six and a wizard. We had twelve men at the tower since the attack, so he sent half of us with them, but them Thalmor bastards said they didn’t need us and went off on their own. We went after them but kept back. That’s why we was late reaching the fort. “

“we could have told them not to just march into that fort.” Another man said, “it’s a death trap. But they don’t listen to no one.”

“And there was a whole lot of bandits.” The first man said.

“What was the toll?” I asked

“These three that need tending, the rest of us can wait.”

“What of the Thalmor?” Danica asked.

“They bore the brunt of the fighting.” The first man said. “Half their men are dead; the other half are poorly.”

“And the bandits?” I asked.

“Getting reacquainted with their ancestors.” The second man said.

“Has the Jarl been informed?” I asked.

“He’s being told now.” He said, as Lucia entered the temple.

“We heard the report.” She said.

“Must we not try to help the wounded Thalmor in the fort?” I asked her and Danica. “I have no special love for the Thalmor, but they are children of the Divines as we are. Should we not help out of common decency?”

Danica smiled. “Once again, sister, you display your true colors.” She said.

“I will not risk anyone on that road with less than a company to guard them.” Lucia said.

“The Captain is in Dragon’s Reach right now asking for twenty men, plus the six to replace us.” The first man said, “They will be on the road in no time.”

“You will inform that Captain that he will not leave without me.” I said. "We will treat these men, and if Lucia will collect a chest of supplies, I will be ready to depart immediately after.”

“I will collect the supplies, and we can deliver them together.” Lucia said. “Otherwise, I will tie you hand and foot if necessary, to stop you from going.”

“Your armor will make them suspicious.” I said.

“Then I will not wear it.” She said.

* * *

It was past midday when we approached the fort. Jordis and the captain would not allow Lucia and I to approach. Runa wore leather armor and accompanied the first party to enter the fort before allowing us to enter, to be met by three wounded Thalmor soldiers and one wounded mage.

“Good and brave soldiers, we are here to tend your wounds and give you all aid you may require.” I said. “My name is Noxaura, and this is Lucia. Which of you is most in need?”

“Whom do you worship?” the mage asked.

“I am a Priestess of the Maetreum of Cybele, sera. Do not fear corruption from us. We are all creatures of the Divines.”

“I only wish to know which Divine to thank for your appearance.” She said

“May I know your name, honored Thalmor?” I asked as I unpacked the chest.

“I am Salerne Silinal.” She said, pain clearly written on her face. “And I am no Thalmor. None of us here present are.”

“I humbly beg your pardon, sera.” I said, “I meant no disrespect, I though it simply another name for your race.”

“Most Altmer on the Isles are not members of that sect.” she said with a gasp as I started to move her robes to inspect her injuries. “That may not be the case in Skyrim.”

“It is a conversation for another time, brave mage. Runa inform all the men in your company that they are to wait outside of the fort and allow no one to observe. This is women’s work.”

* * *

It was late afternoon when we finally returned to Whiterun with our four wounded Altmer patients. 

“Instruct your men not to refer to them as Thalmor, Captain,” I said as the wounded were helped into the cart. “They use it as a pejorative, and as of this moment they are under my care, and I will not have that. If it is necessary for them to hear that request from the lips of the Jarl, I can most certainly arrange that.”

“What should they then be called?” he asked

“Wounded soldiers, Captain; for that is what they are. If your men cannot find the least amount of decency, then they may refer to them as Altmer.”

“Yes, Milady.” He said.

“Two of them are very young.” Runa said as we rode back, “younger than Sara. They look to be twins.”

“I have never heard of Altmer twins.” I said. “Do you know their names?”

“The one with the bandaged head is Lilimia, and her copy is Lilisara.” Lucia said.

“They sound like twins.” Jordis said.

“What shall we do with them?” Lucia asked.

“They will stay at the temple until they are well enough to think of other accommodations.” I said. “The wounded guardsmen will do well enough in their own homes and barracks, and we will ensure that they receive proper care wherever they may be.”

“Some in the city won’t like it.” Runa said.

“Some in the city will have to live with it for the time being.” I answered.

Runa smiled. “As the Reverend Mother wishes.” She said.

“Gods” I said, “Runa, ride ahead and convince that priest of Talos that his presence is urgently needed elsewhere.” I said.

“Where?” she asked.

“Anywhere.” I answered.

* * *

“Sera, I am ashamed to admit that I do not know the proper rites to perform for departed Altmer.” I said to Salerne Silinal after all the Altmer wounded were settled in the temple. “We will not leave your fallen comrades where they lay. A cart is returning to collect them. If you will tell us what is right to do, I will see it done.”

“That is very generous, Priestess. May we discuss this later?”

“Of course.” I said, “Now is a time for rest.”

“May I speak with you a moment, sister?” Danica asked.

“What you did is beyond generous.” She said. “It was not just noble or selfless. In my mind there can be no further room for doubt. Aric is correct. You are a direct descendant of the Blessed Mother.”

“It was common decency, sister, truly,” I said.

“Common decency is not so common in these times.” She said. “Your modesty does you credit, but nothing in this life will ever cause me to doubt you.” She said.

“I do not cry, sister, truly; it is just tiredness, and the tasks I have yet ahead of me before the sun sets.” I said as I wiped my eyes.

“Go home and rest.” She said. “Sister.”

Lucia and I walked slowly. “We have depleted your fathers stores of medicinals.” I said, “And I do not have the skill to replace them exactly.”

“His recipes are at home.” She answered, “And between us we should be able to produce passable copies.”

“Gods. My final fitting is this afternoon.” I said. “My armor is ready.”

“That can wait until we have bathed, eaten and rested.” Lucia said. “And I am sure Adrianne and Amren will understand if you chose to take the remainder of the day to rest.”

“It would weigh on my conscious if I did not keep to my schedule.” I said, before stopping. “Where is the armor from the wounded Thal… from the wounded Altmer soldiers?”

“Still in the cart that brought them?” she answered.

“Excuse me” I said, as I turned towards the guard house, “I have a request to make.”

* * *

“This will certainly keep you occupied.” Adrianne said, “It will serve well for your daily lessons in smithing. But unless your wounded patients are prepared to wait a week or two, it is best if I assist you.”

“Thank you for your generosity, but I do not wish to impose on your more that I currently do.” I said.

“Now that your armor is finished, I have time to spare.” She answered, “And it will take me considerably less time that it will you.”

“You do not object to assisting Altmer?” I asked.

“Should I object?” she asked me

“They are soldiers of the Aldmeri Dominion.” I answered. “Their reputation in Skyrim is not good.”

“It is the Thalmor’s reputation that is not good. Not in Skyrim, nor anywhere else in Tamriel.” She answered.

“I have only recently learned that the words ‘Altmer’ and ‘Thalmor’ are not equivalent.” I said.

“They are in no way equivalent.” She answered. “The Thalmor are a fanatic sect. They believe in their supremacy, and their right, truly their duty, to subjugate all other races, including those Altmer who do not bend to their will.”

“A day does not pass that I am not reminded of my ignorance.” I said. “Forgive me, friend. I am ashamed.”

“It is a common mistake, friend.” She answered, “I do not know you very well, but I know enough to see that you do not act out of malice or wish harm on anyone simply because of the race they were born into.”

“That is a trait I believe we share.” I answered.

* * *

Our smithing ran twice the length that was usual, and I had just enough time to change and present myself for my afternoon lesson, with a promise to Adrianne that I would return for my armor afterward.

“Forgive me, Amren, it has been quite a long day, and it will continue well into the evening.” I said.

“So I have been informed. I am happy that you still attend.” Amren said, “Many students would beg off, pleading fatigue. But it is even more important to practice when you are fatigued. Battles are almost never fought when you are rested.”

So began our normal lesson, ending with the addition of two sword practice, this time with the added weight of practice swords.

“Foresworn berserkers are masters of the dual hand spinning attack. Only those with extraordinary speed are able to use such an attack successfully.” He said.

“I shall be happy with a passable proficiency in self-defense.” I said.

“You have that already, honored pupil.” He said. “It is another matter I speak of now.”

“Another matter?”

“You do well with either hand, though it is natural that your dominant hand is much better than your off hand.” He began, “but your practice this morning with Jenassa demonstrates your true ability with the twin sword attack. Given time, you will be strong enough to match with steel what you showed with magic. But if you were to use shorter swords, balanced correctly, I believe you would match that level of ability now.”

“Do you truly believe so?” I asked, not believing it myself.

“I do.” He said, “and I would like to test my theory tomorrow morning. I will modify two broken practice swords to serve as your weapons. They should do well for the test.”

“You are the Master, sir, and I am your student. I am in your hands.”

“Tomorrow morning, then.” He said as we parted.

* * *

Afternoon was turning into evening, and my promise to return to Adrianne was postponed until the morning. She had made good progress with the armor repairs but promised that there would be sufficient work to occupy me for two more days. A short respite to bath and dress preceded my return to the temple.

“They are all doing well.” Danica said. “Thanks to your intervention and care.”

“Thanks to Aric’s medicinals.” I replied, “Which Lucia and I will spend the evening replenishing.”

“Do not exclude me from your cabal, I beg you.” She said, “I wish to do my part, and Jenessen will attend our recovering patients. And it has been some time since I have had the pleasure of sitting with other women, mixing potions and ointments and chatting about whatever comes to mind.”

“In that case, sister, let us walk together and the chatting can begin early.”


	27. How many lives like this have I ended

**13th of Rain's Hand**

It was the most beautiful armor I had ever seen. Leather and dragon hide tunic and breeches, leather, dragon hide and ebony scale gauntlets, an ebony mail shirt with half sleeves, ebony scale and plate pauldrons, ebony scale tasses, ebony plate cuisses and greaves.

"My friend, I am in awe." I said truthfully. "It is the finest thing I have ever worn, or ever will. This is a masterpiece and fit for a king. Can it truly be for me?"

"It is custom made specifically to your shape, with some minor adjustment to account for recent changes in your figure." Adrianne said with a smile, "so, in answer to your question, friend, yes, it is truly for you."

"You continue to demonstrate why your time is so consumed with custom orders." Lydia said, "It is an exquisite set of armor."

"How does it feel?" Lucia asked.

"Its weight is not too burdensome." I said, "but it is certainly heavier than practice armor."

"You will soon forget that it is there." Adrianne said. "Though you will definitely notice when it is absent."

"Remember your promise to me." Runa said, "I am given the honor of marring this shining masterpiece before anyone else."

"In that case, sister, you must accompany me to my morning lesson, which begins shortly."

* * *

"It is a remarkable set of armor." Amren said. "Equally as important, it fits you like a glove."

"I have promised Runa the honor is being the first to disfigure it." I said.

"Unless she intends to strike you with all her might using that excellent glass sword, I do not believe she will mark it at all." Amren said. "But first, here are two shorter practice swords. How do they balance when you hold them?"

"Can they be so light, and still be so long?" I asked

"They are each a hand's length shorter than what you practice with." He said. "You identify the benefit immediately. You will identify the deficit when you face off against your opponent with the longer sword." He handed a practice sword to Runa. "Yesterday you fought an opponent who also wielded two weapons. Today you face an opponent who wields only one. Jenassa could only parry, Runa can also block. But parrying is faster and allows you to close the gap with your opponent, reducing their ability to swing fully. But recall your opponent in the rift and avoid a shoulder strike that can robe you of your balance."

"Come, sister" Runa said, "The sun rises, and we each have busy days."

"As you wish, sister." I said, and the battle commenced.

It was as Amren said. My arms felt little of the weight of the shortened blades and they flew in a flurried attack, my feet following suit as I kept the gap closed to prevent Runa from using her much greater strength and longer sword to counterattack. I continued to press her backwards, using triangular steps to force her to turn, and preventing her from setting her feet. But the added weight of the armor began to finally take its toll on my legs, and I barely avoided a bash from her shoulder and sword hilt when I failed to retreat quickly enough. With the wider gap she was able to make full use of her arms and sword, and it was my turn to be on the defensive, parrying and dodging. Amren had drummed into my head "do not be led by your opponent." I retreated to slightly higher ground, forcing Runa to attack from the incline. She still had the longer blade, and the greater strength, but I had the advantage of speed. I closed the gap before she could react, ducked my head, and struck her chest and side with my shoulder and then, as she attempted to regain her balance, resumed my flurried attack with my somewhat refreshed legs.

"HALT!" Amren said finally, ending our battle.

"A moment. Good instructor. For me to. Regain. My breath." I said, my breath coming in uneven gulps. "And also, to regain some feeling in my arms. They are still numb from Runa's assault, as are my legs. Sister, you could at least pretend to be out of breath or, in some other way, affected by the strain of our duel."

"As I was on the defensive for most of our session, it is understandable that I am not as out of breath as you are." She answered, "or as moist. You attack like a whirlwind. If you had not faltered, I would have been forced to retreat as you did to more favorable ground."

"My legs are not yet used to the added weight." I said, "for which I almost paid dearly."

"Your legs will compensate eventually," Amren said, "but we will add some strengthening to your training. Aside from that you did well. I believe that your true proficiency lies in two swords. I do not diminish your ability with one sword, and there will certainly be times when it's full length will be an advantage and having your left hand free to cast spells will allow you to use those weapons that many do not possess. In that sense I believe Jenassa was correct: you are a Sword Dancer."

"Jenassa called you a Sword Dancer?" Runa asked me, her expression changing.

"Yes, though I must admit that it is an expression that I do not know." I said. Her expression was still odd. "Sister, what is wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong." She replied. "It is only that the more I learn of you, the more of an enigma you become."

"There is no great mystery to me, friend, I simply do not wish to die an early death." I said.

"On that point I believe we can all agree." Amren said.

* * *

"How are our patients?" I asked Danica as I arrived.

"They are doing quite well." She answered. "And how are you?"

"My legs have yet to recover from the morning lesson. It did not help that my time at the stables included practice mounting and dismounting while wearing full armor." I said.

"The next hour or two will then give your legs a much-needed rest." She said.

"You improve so quickly." I said to Lilimia after I had changed the bandage on her head. "It is a gift to the young from the Divines. Lilisara, if you will lay so that your head is off the edge of your cot, I will wash your hair."

"I cannot allow a Priestess of your stature to perform so menial a task, Reverend Mother." She said.

"How do you know that I am a Reverend Mother?" I asked

"One of the guards was speaking to his wounded kinsman, and mentioned you, your Grace." Lilisara said.

"Well, the task is not so beneath my station as you may think." I said, "I have performed much more onerous tasks recently. And besides, you and your sister remind me of my own adopted sister, who is about your age, and who I miss terribly. I would consider it a kindness if you would allow me."

"In that case I would be honored." She said.

"I must admit in advance that I have no skill with braiding." I said.

"I can accomplish that task, your Grace." Lilimia said.

"Tomorrow you will both be healed enough to have proper baths." I said, "I will arrange for clothing for all of you. I forbid any of you from wearing armor for seven days. Potions and ointments and spells only assist your body to repair itself. It must be given sufficient time to do so."

"Will Salerne allow us to be idle so long?" Lilisara asked her sister.

"Is Salerne Silinal your commander?" I asked.

"No." Lilimia said, "Our commander died in the attack."

"I am very sorry." I said. "Did any of you who survived lose kinsmen in the attack?"

"No." Lilimia said.

"The other member of your party that survived does not speak. I do not even know his name." I said, "I thought it might be from grief."

"His name is Ganra, and he barely speaks to us." She said.

"I observed you with the twins." Salerne Silinal said as I checked on her. "You treat them as if they were your own kinsmen."

"They remind me of my adopted sister Sara." I said, "I miss her terribly. We would brush each other's hair. She seemed to always be armed with a hairbrush."

"I am sorry for your loss." She said.

"She is not gone, she is in Solitude, caring for a poor orphan we rescued after a bandit attack killed her parents." I said.

"You have a very noble and compassionate nature, that appears to run in your family line." She said.

"You are too generous, honored mage." I said, "but I thank you for saying so. It is a tenant of our faith to do none harm, to speak none harm, and to think none harm. I am ashamed that I do not always succeed."

"The ideal version of our selves is not to be attained, since attainment is not possible." She said, "It is the striving that matters."

"You speak masterfully, Sera." I said, "I promise to pay you due attribution when I repeat your excellent wisdom."

"You may attribute that saying to my mother." She said.

"Come now, I am armed with the mighty hairbrush, the basins of water and towels sit nearby. You will soon have clean hair, though given its length it may require a second set of hands." I said.

* * *

"He has a beautiful voice" Danica said, as we sat under the Gildergreen. "It is a shame it is not often heard."

"The twins say that he rarely speaks to anyone." I said.

"He has the appearance to match the voice." Danica said. "I wonder that they give him a moment's peace."

"I will arrange for clothing for them for tomorrow." I said. "Salerne is almost as tall as Lucia, and the twins will do well in Sara's dresses."

"What of their own clothing and armor?" she asked.

"Adrianne and I are repairing the armor." I said "Their clothing will be wash, repaired and returned. How is it that I have lived so long yet never knew that Thalmor and Altmer did not mean the same thing? It was Adrianne who explained the matter to me. It still shames me."

"You are too hard on yourself, friend." She said, "You were a member of the great majority before you and Adrianne spoke, now you are a member of the small minority. It is no different than thinking that all Nords are Stormcloaks. Look at me; I am a Nord, yet I am no Stormcloak."

"Your Graces" a guard sergeant said as he approached us, "There is a Thalmor force at the gate. They inquire after the party that was attacked at the fort."

"Divines." Danica said.

"Sergeant, inform the Jarl. I will speak to the Altmer at the gate. But do not create a panic. We must an armed confrontation." I said.

"I will accompany you." Danica said.

"No, sister, I will not risk you. Please stay with your patients." I answered. "That these Altmer asked rather than barging into the city is encouraging."

"I pray that you are correct." Danica said.

"I will be praying the same thing the entire journey to the gate." I said.

* * *

"Divines bless you and keep you safe good sirs." I said to one Altmer officer and Forty soldiers.

 _Gods_ I thought, _they are not short of men._

"My name is Noxaura, a Priestess of the Maetreum of Cybele. How may I assist you?"

"I am Fasion Adus" said the tall elf in ornately gilded armor, "I understand that you are keeping soldiers of the Aldmeri Dominion within the city."

"You are correct, sir, four of your soldiers are having their injuries tended in the temple of Kynareth, which is our house of healing here in Whiterun. Sadly, we have three of your fallen brethren in the House of the Dead. It is where we honor our departed before they receive their last rites. We are not familiar with what is appropriate for Altmer rites and were waiting for the wounded mage to become well enough to instruct us."

My speech seemed to take him by surprise.

"You came to the aid of our soldiers." He said.

"Six of our guard assisted them when they were attacked by bandits at the nearby fort." I said, "A force of men from the city and two Healers, myself included, returned to the fort as quickly as possible. We gave your soldiers what aid we could before transporting them and their brave fallen comrades to the city. It is not our custom to leave fallen soldiers in the field except in extreme circumstances."

"How many of your guard were wounded while aiding my soldiers?" he asked.

"All six were wounded, sir, three seriously." I said. "They are all being treated, though we moved them to their barracks to make room for your soldiers."

He did not seem to know what to say next.

"I will be happy to bring you to your soldiers, sir; both the living and the departed, but it is too small a space to accommodate all of you." I said.

"My men will remain here." He said, "You may proceed."

We were met by Irileth and six guard as we were returning to the temple.

"Divines bless you, Irileth, may I present Fasion Adus who is here to visit his wounded and fallen soldiers, and whose title I am ashamed to admit I do not know." I said.

"I am Regional Commander of all forces of the Aldmeri Dominion not under direct command of the High Justiciar." He replied.

"You honor us with your presence sir" Irileth said, "Jarl Balgruuf is occupied with official business, but will greet you himself if time permits."

"We are walking to the temple, Irileth, if you wish to accompany us." I said.

Fasion Adus could not have been comfortable walking through Whiterun without so much as an escort, but he showed no concern, his face remained calm, and did not react even as we approached the temple and the Shrine of Talos came into view.

"I apologize sir." I said, "But it is, after all, a Nord city, and such a shrine is to be expected."

"I am no Thalmor to fly into a passion at such a sight, good Priestess." He said, "You men may stand easy."

Danica greeted the commander as he entered.

"Do not stir." He said to the four Altmer who made to rise upon seeing him. "your wounds take precedence over protocol." Then he turned to address Irileth.

"I would like to speak to any of the guard that aided my soldiers that are well enough to do so."

"I will arrange it at once." She said before leaving.

He stopped by each cot and spoke to each wounded solider. Each recited their name and rank. He asked each how their wounds fared, about their homes and families. He took note of the elaborate braids that the sisters had provided Salerne.

"I can attest firsthand how tedious it is to lay on a cot and wait to heal, sir." I said. "And it is the benefit of a community of women that we can pass the time with such things." I said.

"You were wounded, Priestess?" he asked.

"I was seriously wounded, and my father was killed, in a bandit attack, sir." I said. "I would have died, but for the intervention of the Divines, who sent me a savior."

"These bandits are a plague upon the land." He said as the door opened, and three guardsmen entered.

"Sir these are three of the men who were present at the fort." Irileth said.

"I thank you, brave men, for assisting my soldiers in their time of need." He said to the three. "I thank you for the lives of these four that survived."

"I wish we had been closer, Milord, when the fighting started" one man said, "More of your men would be here if we had been."

"It is not your fault warrior" Salerne said, "The fault rest with us. You gave us your warning about the fort, but we ignored it."

"That weren't on you, Lady" said another man. "You didn't know that fort. We've been fighting bandits in that fort for as long as I can remember. We ask the Empire to garrison the fort so them bastards can't use it, but they won't, and we don't have the men."

"It was us that should have stopped you from getting yourselves killed." The first man said. "We should have stopped you, or we should have stayed right with you. We shouldn't have lagged behind."

"Again, brave warriors, the blame does not lie with you." Salerne said. "Our Captain made it plain that he wanted none of your help. That you accompanied us at all is impressive and says much for your sense of duty. We four are alive because of you and your wounded comrades."

"We should raze that fort to the ground." The second man said.

"I am at a loss for words." The commander said. "What you did, solider and Priestess alike, is not heard of in my experience in Skyrim. We are not accustomed to anyone's aid. We do not expect it, and we do not rely on it."

"We are true brethren, then." Said Balgruuf, who had entered without anyone noticing. "We are a city that has not aligned with either side in this very un-civil war. We are treated as suspect by Imperial and Stormcloak alike. As you have heard, we cannot rely on aid from either side, and we expect none. But for some allies in other holds who are like minded, we are alone. But we do not fear this. We defend our home, we live our lives, we are generous to those in need, and do not harm those who do not wish to harm us. We treat others as we wish to be treated ourselves. In this way, surely, we please the Divines."

"You will excuse me, Jarl, while I find you a Priests robes that will fit you adequately." I said with a smile.

"I thank you, Reverend Mother" he said, "But my current employment is already more than I can manage."

"Commander Fasion Adus, this is Jarl Balgruuf the Greater, Jarl of Whiterun." Irileth said.

The Commander and the Jarl spoke for a short time before Balgruuf escorted him to the Hall of the Dead.

"We did not know what was right." I said to Salerne, though all could hear. "we cleaned them as we would our own and composed them. A simple spell was used that will keep them preserved until they receive what rites you prescribe. They will appear simply to be asleep." The thought of my last moments with Railius had their usual result, and as the tears flowed down my face a sob escaped my lips.

"Please forgive me." I said to a room that was completely quiet. "I was thinking of my father."

"He would be proud of you." Danica said. "He is proud of you."

"He is never far from me." I said, "He will always be with me, as long as I remember him; and I will remember him until my days end."

"Would you have room in your family for two more adopted sisters?" Lilimia asked.

"We would be honored to call you sister." Lilisara said.

"The honor would be mine." I said. "It is our custom to embrace those we love, if it does not offend you."

By their reaction, no offense was taken.

* * *

"You have been in a melancholy since the commander departed." Balgruuf said as our small party borrowed the small room in the Bannered Mare. "What troubles you?"

The small Breton community in Whiterun was holding their Day of the Dead celebration, and the Jarl had donned his disguise and invited us to join him to enjoy the festivities.

"The four elves recovering in the temple." I said. "two of them remind me of Sara. The silent one has a voice and appearance that could rival the bard from High Rock. The tall mage could be my sister who is present with us. They are all young, with full lives before them. Families of their own to dream of. I cringe to think what their fate would have been if we had met in the mine, or on the southern road. They were not there. But others were. How many of the dead would resemble these four, of whom I have grown so attached? How many lives like this have I ended, or helped to end? Can a sin of that magnitude ever be forgiven? I would give my life to protect the lives of these four. Should I not have died rather than take the lives I have taken?"

"That is a question worthy of someone much wiser than I, your Grace." Balgruuf said. "In war, in a battle, there is no right or wrong, there is only live or die. Not all wars are just. Not all deaths are just. Any life cut short is a tragedy. A peaceful death at the end of a long life, well lived, while sad, can also be celebrated.

We can sit and discuss these things in the relative peace of our borrowed room. In a struggle where the choice is your death or the death of your opponent, there is no room for philosophy. When men are amassed, and steel is drawn, the man or woman who steps between the two armies and asks for reason is generally the first to die. There are times when all the choices are bad choices."

"You attempted to reason with the Justiciar at the watch tower." Lucia said. "You did not simply rush in and attack. You are not a violent person. That battle was not your choice. The battle at Dragon's Bridge was not your choice. The battle in the mine was not your choice. In everything, you have acted only to defend your friends, or to defend those in need."

"The sergeant at the tower gave his report." Balgruuf said, "He said they would all have died if you had not intervened. Is it possible that some of the Thalmor soldiers were much like these four? Yes. That is also true for your other battles. Not every solider in a battle participates willingly. Many wish to be anywhere but where they are in that instant. Most do not wish harm on anyone. Too many are too young and retain too much humanity.

Every battlefield in history is littered with the bodies of such young soldiers. That will continue to be true long after we three are dust. Do not take the sins of the world upon yourself, your Grace. They do not belong to you, and your shoulders will not bear the burden."

"It has been so long since I was able to sleep without a potion." I said, "I fear tonight will be no different."

"It would require both of your hands, and possibly one of your feet, to count the number of soldiers who are scattered throughout the taverns of Whiterun, drinking so that they may sleep without nightmares." Balgruuf said. "It is little consolation, I know, but you are not alone. And always remember those that love you and would assist you if it is in their power."

"You are both very kind to indulge in my self-pity." I said. "I strive to be made of sterner stuff than I am presently. But I fight too many battles, and too many of them are in my own mind. It was not so long ago that Aric and I had a very similar conversation. In that instance, it was I comforting him, trying to convince him of exactly the same points. I did not fully understand why he could not see the truth of my argument. My understanding is somewhat better now."

"Hold tightly to your humanity, friend." Balgruuf said, "There is much hardness in the world already. We would miss your compassion, and you _'common decency'_ were it to vanish. Continue to be the Noxaura that we know presently."

"Your words echo those that my father spoke to me." I said. "I thank you Jarl, for your kindness."

"Let us lift our cups and drink a toast to Reverend Mother Noxaura, whose compassionate action shows us what a world at peace may resemble." Balgruuf said.

"To Reverend Mother Noxaura." Lucia said.


	28. I feared I had driven you away

**14th of Rain’s Hand**

“What time did they return?” I asked

“Only Father returned, either very late or very early. “Runa said.

“But she had only just rejoined us.” I said.

“She keeps to her own schedule.” She answered. “Though I sometimes feel that domestic settings such as this make her uneasy.”

“Her description of her family differs somewhat from how I would describe yours.” I said.

“I have something for you.” Runa said, producing a rectangular wooden case.

“I thank you, sister, but for what occasion?” I asked, “My birthday is two months hence.”

“These came into my mind after our practice session.” Runa said. “Father will not complete the modifications to your swords for several more days. We cannot have you unarmed during that time, and you clearly demonstrated that these will not be wasted on you, as they would be on me.”

I opened the case to reveal two beautiful matched short swords.

“Gods.” I said as I looked at them.

“They were part of what we took from the Temple of Miraak.” Runa said, “I thought them too exquisite to leave behind, even though they do not suit me.”

“Sister, I cannot accept these.” I said, “they are too valuable.”

“They are mine to dispose of as I wish.” She said, “And they are no good to anyone sitting at the bottom of a chest. You make light of your progress, and your skill; but I have faced an opponent or two, and I tell you these blades will suit you as well as that shiny armor I have yet to mark. You will rust the dragon steel, sister, if you cannot control your tears.”

“Forgive me, dear sister. My heart overflows.” I said.

“The hilts are dragon bone and scale.” Runa said, “And they are enchanted, which is why they show no decay. Father believes they are hundreds of years old.”

“You amaze me.” I said.

“Speak to Adrianne when you next see her.” Runa said, “she can fashion scabbards to match both the swords and your armor.”

“It is a simple matter.” Adrianne said. “I have scabbards that would do well now, but it will take me no great time to make them match your armor.”

“Thank you.” I said, before heading off form my lesson.

* * *

“The two of you have become close companions.” Jervar said, “She knows you even from a distance.”

“She is very sweet.” I said, “and has been very patient as I learn how she should be treated.”

My morning lesson with Amren was concluded, my time at the stables just beginning, when Jenssen approached with two unexpected guests.

“Two of them wounded elves.” Jervar said.

“Two brave wounded soldiers, good stable master, and both my sworn sisters.” I said, my impression of Mother Pevel almost perfect in tone. “You will, therefore, be respectful, or silent.”

“Yes, your Grace.” He said. “I meant no offense.”

“I am sure you did not.” I answered.

“Reverend Mother” Jenssen said, “Danica said they were healthy enough to walk, and their first request was to see horses. We did not expect to find you here.”

“Sisters,” I said, “My heart swells to see you so much better. Lilimia, with your bandage removed I will no longer be able to tell you from Lilisara.”

“Reverend Mother, we did not recognize you as we approached.” Lilisara said. 

“Please call me Noxaura,” I said with a smile, “it is what sisters do.”

“Sister, you wear the armor of a warrior.” Lilimia said.

“Sadly, yes.” I said. “I learned a hard truth, a lesson that nearly cost me my life. The land is in an upheaval, and the robes of a Priestess are no protection. If I am not to be cloistered behind city walls, I must learn to protect myself. I train, therefore, with sword and armor and horse; and look forward to the day when I can put off this garb and resume the robes that I have worm since I was eight years old.”

“They expressed an affection for horses, your grace, and the stables were not too far.” Jenessen said.

“Is this your horse?” Lilimia asked.

“Yes, this is my patient companion.” I said. “Her name is Loga.”

The sound of her name drew smiles from the sisters.

“It is an unusual name to be sure.” I said. “It is the name that the Thane gave to her.”

“Do you know what it means?” Lilisara asked.

“I thought it only a name, with no special meaning.” I said.

“It means ‘Blaze’.” Lilisara said.

“It is what we call the white stripe she bears in the middle of her face, your Grace.” Jervar said.

“I had no idea.” I said.

“Is the Thane a High Elf?” Lilimia asked.

“No, why do you ask?” I asked.

“The name he chose for your horse is in the language that our Grandfather speaks.” Lilimia answered.

It was then that Loga decided to scratch her face and head against my back, and the scene devolved to laughter.

The twins visited the other horses until my lesson in the saddle concluded. Our party of four walked back slowly, talking about horses, and armor. We were about to pass Adrianne’s shop and forge, when Lilisara noticed the armor on which she was working.

“That looks to be elven armor.” She said.

“That armor belongs to one of you.” I said. “I took the liberty of asking Adrianne to repair the damage it incurred during your battle. I apologize for not asking you in advance.”

“You are all too generous.” Lilimia said. “I have never known a city in Skyrim such as this.

“We have not found Skyrim a hospitable land.” Lilisara said.

“Neither have I of late.” I said. “It is a land in turmoil. That turmoil has cost me my father and all the family of my youth. The family I have found recently has adopted me as one of their own. I would have died if not for them. So, you see, there is good in Skyrim. The Thane of whom I spoke said once to me that it is those that love us, that show us love, that we remember forever. Those that cause us pain eventually fade to nothing.”

“That is beautiful.” Lilimia said.

“I would like to meet the Thane before we depart.” Lilisara said.

“Be forewarned,” I said, “He will look upon you and see his daughters and will dote on you mercilessly.”

Young women have a laughter all their own.

* * *

“You have returned sir.” I said to him as I dried my hair, “Though the number of your party is reduced by one.”

“You are correct madam.” He replied, “but do not think I misplaced her. She chose to depart on her own. She will bear a message, and then visit her Mother.”

“I have missed you.” I said, dropping our playful artifice. “I feared I had driven you away.”

“Never fear that.” He said, “My absence had a different purpose.”

“I know I should not worry, that you can look after yourself.” I said, “But I began to believe that my recent behavior had hurt you and that you chose to be elsewhere. Then, when you did not return, I began to think that something had occurred.”

“We had a distance to travel, and it was important that we were not recognized.” He said. “Serana suggested that our return journeys should be separate, in the event an alert was issued for a man and woman traveling together. It hastened her departure by only a day or two, and it was a prudent precaution to take.”

“Why would an alert be issued?” I asked.

“Siddgeir is dead.” He said.

I was silent for a moment as I took in his news.

“Dead.” was all I could find to say, as I sat down in the nearest chair.

“He was killed by a member of the Dark Brotherhood.” He said. “The Black Sacrament was conducted. The Night Mother heard the request. An assassin was dispatched. That the assassin was also the person performing the sacrament is an odd coincidence, but then the world is filled with such coincidences in these times. Everything was properly handled. The Brotherhood received their thousand gold. No one has cause to complain, excepting Siddgeir, who no longer has the means to do so.”

Siddgeir played a tertiary part in the attempt on my life. He was certainly guilty of much more heinous conduct. 

“I am ashamed at my reaction to this news. I violate my oath, and the tenants of my faith by rejoicing in his death. I ask the Divines for forgiveness.” I said.

“Siddgeir is asking the same Divines for forgiveness, which will not be forthcoming.” He said.

“I must fly to the temple or I will be late.” I said. “We also have news to share, but perhaps Lucia will tell it before I can. And I have two patients who informed me my horse is named ‘Blaze’. I appear to be the only person in Skyrim whose education did not include languages.”

“They knew the name?” he asked.

“It is the language their Grandfather speaks.” I said. “They also expressed an interest in meeting you.”

“I am intrigued.” He said.

Lydia appeared with a bundle of clothing.

“You cannot carry so much on your own.” She said, “I will accompany you.”

“I will be your beast of burden, madam.” Aric said, “It will provide an excuse to meet these intriguing guests.”

“I will warm you in advance, you cannot adopt these two, no matter how much you may wish to.” I said, “they are not orphans.”

* * *

“Aric, Thane of Whiterun, this is Lilisara and her sister Lilimia.” I said.

“Það er mér heiður að kynnast ykkur báðum.” Aric said to the twins.

“Við erum sömuleiðis, Thane.” Lilimia answered with a giant smile.

It took no more than a few seconds, yet we had the attention of everyone in the temple, particularly the two elves who were not part of the conversation.

“You must now, in all fairness sir, switch to a language that can be understood by all.” I said. “Sara’s dresses are for Lilimia and Lilisara; Lucia’s robe is for Salerne. Ganra, you must be patient a moment longer. There is no member of the Thane’s household so tall and slender as you who matches your gender. The Jarl has promised you clean clothing, which I am sure will be here presently.”

“Thank you, your Grace.” He said in his beautiful voice, his thanks quickly repeated by him comrades.

“You must certainly not let him out of doors.” Aric whispered, “The female population of Whiterun will pester him to within an inch of his life.”

“He and Salerne are due their exercise.” Danica whispered in reply, “We may have to provide him a guard.”

“I had thought to invite them to visit your home.” I said to Aric, “to use the bath, at the very least. But I was not sure. We would have to hide any armor and weapons they might recognize, would we not?”

“Not necessarily.” He replied. “Lucia’s remark to the Justiciar contained more defiance than truth. I made her armor and Runa’s armor myself, with modifications of my own design. You would see the difference immediately if you made a direct comparison.”

“They are guests of Whiterun at my insistence. They are under my care, and Danica’s care, at my insistence.” I said, “They are finally well enough to move about, and I am sure they would appreciate a change of scenery, even if for only a short time.”

“They will be well enough to travel in two days, though they cannot wear armor for several days more.” Danica said. “They are to make their way to the encampment the Commander has established. Balgruf knows the location.”

“They cannot proceed on foot to an Elven encampment alone, just the four of them, not even if they were in peak condition.” I said. “They are too few, they would be easy prey.”

“You are absolutely right.” Aric said. “They will need an escort. I will consult with Balgruf. Rest assured, they will be returned to their commander rested, healed, and healthy.”

“Please, all of you, be my guests during your stay. I can at least offer you a proper bath. The Reverend Mother will attest to its qualities. Ganra, I go at once to confer with the Jarl. I will not leave him without attaining suitable attire for you. Reverend Mother, may I have a moment of your time outside?”

“What has become of the Priest of Talos?” he asked once we were outside the temple.

* * *

“These are Kló crystals” Lydia said, “With the common variety, you drop a palm full into the bath and cast a simple spell and they collect the dirt and detritus from the water into a hard lump such as this which can be removed and discarded, leaving pristine water, and a fragrance of oil of lavender.”

“The common variety?” I asked, “Is there another variety of such a rare thing?”

“There is if you are not a mage, and your children and their Father display an aversion to assisting in cleaning the bath.” She said with a smile. “Aric placed a modified enchantment on this container of crystals. They will work their magic immediately upon entering the water.”

“I have copied so many spells from your Library I must beg another notebook from you.” I said.

“Those we have in abundance.” She said. “And Belethor knows to maintain a supply.”

“May I assist in any way to prepare for tonight’s guests?” I asked.

“All is in hand but thank you for your offer.” She answered.

“In that case, I must leave you for Adrianne and the final repair to our guest’s armor. I must bring my gift from Runa, so we may test fit the scabbards.”

“They will do very well.” Adrianne said.

“They are a perfect match.” I said truthfully, “Did you really have these in storage?”

“Yes, I made them for an elven archer many years ago.” She said, “I promised them to him on a certain day, and he did not appear, not on that day or any other. It cannot be less than ten years I have kept these.”

“They look exactly like the sword hilts.” I said.

“That is because they are also dragon bone.” She said. “The belts are dragon hide adorned with scale. The buckles, rings, lockets and chapes are ebony. Amren will show you how to adjust them and wear them properly.”

“Are they truly meant to be worn on my back?” I asked.

“If you intend to also wear a long sword then yes, the shorter blades must be worn thus.” She answered, “Drawing a longsword from the hip is fastest. Drawing one from the back is very difficult, and sheathing it is still more so. Trust me in this, and trust Amren also. He will advise you likewise.”

“I had never thought to own anything of value in my cloistered life.” I said. “You have made me armor fit for a king, and Runa has supplied swords to match.”

“Do not forget Aric’s swords, which will no doubt also be of regal quality.” She said with a smile.

“My friends would not recognize me.” I said “I barely recognize myself. I was a Priestess of no rank, the head of my order excluded me from any advancement. Everything that I could call my own fit into a small chest in my small cell. Now I have armor and weapons worthy of the Emperor. I have dresses fit for a Queen. I am, by Aric’s reckoning, a woman of means. I would trade it all one-hundred times over for the return of my Father.”

“He died defending you.” She said. “Would he have wished for any other end?”

“He would have wished for us both safe and warm, in a house with a fireplace and a garden. No, that was not his wish, it was mine.” I said, before laughing, “His wish would certainly have involved Danica.”

“Ho ho!” she laughed in return, “That is a tale you must certainly finish.”

“We will pick an evening and sit and drink and talk about our lives and dreams.” I said, “I know a private room in the Bannered Mare that will do very well, if it is not occupied when we arrive.”

* * *

“You will not injure me, do not worry.” Janessa said.

“I am more concerned that you will injure me.” I said.

“You are as well armored as any prince of Tamriel.” She replied, “And you will never face an opponent who is armed with practice swords. You must become accustomed to facing deadly weapons. Trust me when I say that you do not want your first such experience to be a fight to the death.”

“Janessa is correct.” Amren said. “Today is the day you begin to train with true weapons. You will attack with them and you will defend against them. You will train with practice swords for six days. Every seventh day you will train with real swords. I will tell you this plainly: all warriors who train to survive the battlefield are wounded in training. Such wounds are badges that all warriors carry. You may add them to the scars you already carry. It is a lesson as important as any you have learned so far: learning to receive a wound without panicking or loss of composure. Like any other skill, it requires practice.”

“I was wounded repeatedly in the Rift, yet still defeated my opponent.” I said.

“I know.” He said. “It was that fact that convinced me you could be trained. Many who wait until they are your age cannot be trained. They have seen too much and can imagine still more, and so instinctively cringe from sharpened steel. You were wounded many times and continued to fight, and defend yourself, and ultimately defeat two very large hired killers. That was no mean feat.”

“On that note, your Grace” Jenassa said, “Defend yourself.”

* * *

“Your katana will be ready before they must leave. It required the least alteration.” The other blade must wait, but I dare say you will do well enough without it. I understand you show a high proficiency with these” Aric said as he sharpened my short blades.

“You are all much too kind.” I said, “The best that can be said is that I did not display total incompetence. I am surprised that there is almost no sign of the trauma they have just undergone. Jenassa did not hold back as she did in our first practice session.”

“It may interest you to know that Jenassa did not hold back during your first session.” Aric said, “Neither did Runa. The quickness of your attack surprised both, and each was on the defensive from the start. And, while they recovered and were able to attack in turn eventually, they both have high praise for your skill. Skill that will continue to improve as you continue to train. It will soon be time to hire a specialized trainer if you continue at this pace.”

“You give me too much credit sir but thank you.” I said. “But do not forget that I am a Priestess first and foremost, and I have trained as a Necromancer far longer than I have trained as a swordsman.”

“I have myself witnessed your ability with sword and spell.” He said. “Were I to combine what I have seen with what I have heard you would be the very model for the Title that Jenassa already grants you.”

“I like the title of Priestess best. You know this.” I said.

“I know.” He said, “It is a title that fits your excellent form as well as your new armor fits it.”

“My form wishes most right now to wear you.” I said. “I miss falling asleep next to you. I miss waking up next to you.”

“I miss your breath on my neck. I miss your skin pressed against mine. I miss how you end each kiss.” He said, “Our life on the road, traveling across Skyrim, seems now like a time apart. A time when only we existed. When the outside world could not intrude.”

“I recall one instance when the outside world intruded, on monstrous wings and with a roar that drove my sense from me.” I said.

“Yes, but it made the quiet that followed sweeter.” He said.

“We rejoin the road in two days.” I said, “will it be the same?”

He laughed, as he took my hand in his, “At the very least, it will be warmer.”

* * *

“He has had, by my count, no less than four offers of lodging so he may convalesce.” Danica said.

“’Convalesce’?” Runa asked, “Is that what we are calling it now?”

“Mila Valentina seemed to lose the power of speech.” Danica replied. “She was not the only one.”

“He is quite attractive.” Runa answered, “And the Jarl’s clothes certainly help. Would you say that he and I are the same age?”

“Caution, sister.” I said, “Lest you exchange one man that speaks directly for another that speaks not at all.”

“Given his effect on women it is no wonder he holds his tongue.” Danica said. “If he had actually spoken to Mila she would have fainted.”

“The twins seem immune.” Jordis said.

“They are very protective of him.” Danica said. “They acted as his shield wall as we walked here from the temple.”

“You note how freely he speaks with Father.” Runa said. “Perhaps you are correct, and his vow of silence is reserved for women.”

“He looks at Lucia as if he is reconsidering the terms of his vow.” I said.

“everyone looks at Lucia that way.” Runa said, “For a fair portion of my life I did not know there was any other way she could be looked at.”

“You receive your share of glances, dear.” Danica said. “Erorn is likely to injure himself at the forge if you pass within eye-shot.”

Runa smiled. “Erorn is quite something to look at himself.” She said, “His arms look as if his strong embrace would crush the life from me.”

“What an odd expression coming from one who smiles the way you do.” I said.

“Do not pretend that you do not enjoy the embrace of a pair of strong arms and have not enjoyed it recently.” Runa said.

“what is the nature of such levity?” Aric asked at Runa, Jordis and Danica’s laughter, as my face turned bright red.

“We were discussing the inability of builders to construct sufficiently thick walls.” Jordis said.

* * *

“They are all so young.” Lydia said. “Did we really allow our own children to roam unattended at such a young age?”

“Not without one of us being present.” Aric said as he sat next to her in front of the hearth with a mug of wine. “They were not well lead to ignore the warning they were so plainly given. They should never have ventured into the fort, not with soldiers that young. Their Captain would have much to answer for had he survived.”

“You and Lucia survived your first encounter.” I reminded him. “The twin companions and their Father did likewise.”

“Yes, but many did not.” He answered. “These four are alive because of the intervention of the Whiterun City guard. And because Noxaura through force of will brought them aid when they were in desperate need of it.” He raised his cup, “A toast to the Warrior Priestess.” He said.

“You give me too much praise, sir.” I said.

“No, sister” Lydia said, as she raised her own mug, “It is the correct proportion of praise.”

“They enjoyed their release from the confined of the temple.” I said, “Even Ganra became animated.”

“It is as Lydia suspected.” Aric said, “He has not yet mastered the art of politely declining unwanted advances. His current stratum is to avoid potential skirmishes by remaining silent and avoiding eye contact.”

“It is an odd sort of curse, is it not?” I asked.

“It is.” Aric said with a half-smile.

I had forgotten to whom I was speaking. Of course, he was aware of such a curse. That he had reached an accommodation with it was a result of his age, and his temperament.

“I am sure he will persevere.” I said, “Others have survived such a sentence, and have even prospered.”

His smile grew large, as his eyes brightened. “That is true. With sufficient time, and an occasional nudge to keep him on the true path, he will embrace his gifts and accept his destiny.”

“Did the twins not look so pretty, in their borrowed dresses with their hair braided so?” Lydia asked.

“Salerne as well.” Aric said. “She and Lucia are almost of a height and spent most of the evening in conversation together.”

“Balgruf refers to Aric as ‘my brother from a different Mother.” Lydia said. “Is there a version for sisters I wonder? If so, I predict it will very soon describe those two.”

“They will be on the road together for some days.” Aric said, “we all will. Your prediction may well have become reality when our shared road ends.”

“You will all go then?” Lydia asked.

“They are still in my care.” I said. “I will not leave them until they are recovered fully and able to bear armor and defend themselves.”

“I promised to see them returned safe and sound.” Aric said. “For that an escort will be necessary. Lucia will accompany us, but Runa and Jordis have a separate task to complete.”

“Will you have sufficient numbers?” Lydia asked.

“I may request aid.” Aric said, “We are already seven in number. We do not wish to form too long a column, lest we invite attack. I have arranged a wagon to transport our guests, and to carry the tents and supplies. That will limit our speed and increase the chances for a bandit attack.”

“Is our destination a closely guarded secret that you still do not share it with members of your party?” I asked playfully.

“Forgive me.” He said. “The commander intends to make camp just north of Loreius Farm, on the western side of the road. He has a letter of introduction from Balgruf to present to Vantus to facilitate the purchase of supplies.”

“They could travel only a bit farther and camp at Heljarchen Hall.” Lydia said.

“I might have suggested it if they had consulted in advance, but the terrain there does not suit as well for so many men.” Aric said. “We will deliver our guests, leave the wagon and excess baggage at our cottage, and continue on to Morthal so that Noxaura may visit the Jarl’s daughter before carefully making our way to the coast where a Corsair vessel will collect us and deposit us at a dock southwest of the Solitude lighthouse. This will allow us to avoid Dragon’s Bridge and shorted our journey to Solitude.”

“How were you able to arrange such a meeting?” I asked, “You could not have known in advance how we would proceed.”

“I had always planned to return to Solitude in this manner.” Aric said, “Serana was to deliver the request to the Captain Volf, Captain of the Dainty Sload, along with a quantity of gold, and a set of dates on which he is to look into a small bay north of Morthal at dawn. The first date is the 19th, and then every day at dawn for seven days. He will receive an equal amount of gold once he has collected us and brought us to our destination.”

“Can you trust him to do what you have requested?” I asked.

“Serana will convince him that it is in his best interest to do so.” He said.

“In that case,” Lydia said, “he will not fail you.”

“What of the wagon driver?” I asked

“The wagon will return to Whiterun with corundum and gold from the mine.” Aric said, “as well as produce from the farm. It is not so far from our normal schedule to draw attention.”

“You appear to have everything arranged.” Lydia said.

“There is yet one more item to complete.” Aric said.

“What is that?” she asked him.

“Noxaura’s Katana.” He replied.


	29. We are a family like any other

**16th of Rain’s Hand**

“Lucia asked me to speak with you.” Aric said as we rode side by side, heading north, the outline of Dragon’s Reach growing more distant. “I am sorry that I did not have an opportunity earlier.”

“You were very busy up until the moment of our departure.” I replied, “and much of that time was completing my sword and enchanting my armor. You seemed to barely have time to eat and rest.”

“There will be sufficient time to rest on this journey.” He said, “and our departure was always conditional on the final additions to your armor and sword.”

“What is to be the topic of our conversation?” I asked

“Lucia recounted your discussion in the Bannered Mare when last you visited.” He said. “That is our topic, if it is not too painful to discuss.”

“Balgruf’s word eased some of the pain.” I replied, “what remains is still tinged with guilt and regret. It will be some time before I cease to superimpose the faces of these young elves upon the bodies of those that I struck down in the mine, or on the increasing number of roads in Skyrim that are littered with the wreckage of my actions.”

“I have also thought of fallen foes and at times felt regret.” He said. “You know this. We save those we can, when we can. Like our stray birds that now roost in Helgen.”

“And yet, my mind goes back to those I have taken from this world.” I said.

“It is a melancholy with which I am more than familiar. Do not let it become too close a friend.” He said. “It has no sense of proportion. It takes all and returns nothing.”

* * *

Our departure had, indeed, been delayed as Aric completed the enchantments on my armor and sword. My sword. It is too small a word for this masterpiece of artwork, made by a different artist than its shorter cousins, but both artists were masters.

“You will no longer require my presence to notice the affinity certain animals have for us when we travel.” He said. “What the Divines have afforded me by their grace I have mimicked as best I could in your armor. Wear it or have it close by. But never completely rely on it.”

“That is the reason for such odd behavior.” I said, “and you say that you received this gift from the Divines?”

“As I received all my natural gifts. It is no spell. It lives within me, as all my gifts live.” He said.

“I always knew…” I started to say before stopping. I could not stop looking at him.

“Always knew?” he asked.

“That you were blessed by the Divines.” I said.

“You are also blessed, if it escaped your notice.” He said, as he looked back at me, and drove my thoughts to tonight, and our shared tent.

“And when you wield this sword you no longer need fear any Justiciar’s attempt to paralyze you, or cause fear, or panic.” He said. “The swords Runa gave you have an enchantment when we discovered them, else I would have added a similar enchantment.”

“What enchantment do they possess?” I asked.

“Miraak was a master at controlling others.” Aric said. “Some opponents, upon being struck by your shorter blades, may turn and attack their former comrades.”

“You and Runa spoil me.” I said. “How can one person be the recipient of so much?”

“You give much love and care to the world, divine heart.” He said, “The world owes you as much care and love in return. These things that are meant to ensure your safety are but a small down payment.”

* * *

We were a fair-sized column. The Jarl had loaned Aric four guard. They would continue to his house and return to Whiterun with the wagon load of ingots and supplies from the farm. And Vilkas, who after hearing only the rumor that Aric and Lucia were to escort the elves back to their brethren and were seeking aid, pleaded his case in such terms that his aid was immediately accepted. 

“Gods, say yes and put him out of his misery.” Runa said to Aric and Lucia. “Whiterun will be unbearable otherwise.”

Runa, Jordis, and Jenassa had their own mission. 

“You can take me with you, or I can follow you” Farkas said to Runa, “but I will not be cast aside once again while my less attractive brother gathers all the glory.”

“You do realize that you are identical twins, do you not?” Runa asked.

“I am more identical than he is.” Farkas said with a wry grin.

“Well, now that is settled, I have armor to enchant.” Was all Aric said.

Lucia’s armor garnered a great deal of attention. Much comparison was made as Lucia and Vilkas loaded the standard issue armor of the three elves into the wagon, with different pieces held up to compare to what Lucia was wearing. Loading was delayed for a short time as Aric described to elf and man alike how he came to make the modifications and improvements that made Lucia’s armor unique.

“She is tall, and spell and staff are all she will ever wield.” Aric explained to them. “Protection from arrows and magic are most critical for her. Very few opponents live long enough to approach within weapons distance.”

Four elven faces reevaluated the tall figure in armor.

“I thought you were simply a gifted healer.” Salerne said.

“I learned healing from my Father.” Lucia said, “He is the true healer. But I learned what I could. It was useful in my youth when my aim had not yet developed fully.”

“Ganra has not taken his eyes from her since she has appeared.” I whispered to Aric.

“And there stands a group of women who do not take their eyes from Ganra, as they mourn his leaving.” Aric whispered back.

* * *

The wagon was finally loaded, it’s four passengers sharing space with tents and supplies. Ganra held the collection of farewell gifts he received from his admirers, together with freshly baked sweets, in two separate baskets. His three comrades traded glances and smiles but said nothing.

“You won’t remember me, your Grace, but I met you on your first visit to Whiterun.” One of the guards said while Aric was saying his farewells to Lydia.

“Did we meet, sir?” I asked, “I am sorry that I do not remember. I was still in mourning, and my thoughts were filled with sorrow.”

“We met on the road, sera, when you first arrived.” He said. “We didn’t know you was in mourning. Please accept my sympathies, as late as they are.”

On the road. “Of course.” I said, “You greeted the three of us: The Thane, Sara and me. You mentioned his capture of the dragon.”

“You have me dead to rights, your Grace.” He said. “Did he finally tell you the story?”

“He did.” I answered. “It is almost too fantastical to believe, except the Jarl attests to its accuracy.”

“It’s the stuff of legends, no mistake.” He answered.

“The Thane himself is the stuff of legends.” I replied.

“He is that.” The man said. “We always rest easier while we have him in Whiterun, though his daughters are almost as much of a comfort.”

“Apples and trees, sir.” I said.

“You Grace?” he asked.

“Do you not say _the apple does not fall far from the tree_ in Whiterun?” I asked.

“Yes, your Grace, we do.” He said. “We say _chip off the original block_ as well.”

* * *

We had left the farms behind as we continued north and approached a house on the right.

“That is the house where Bajald Eraldsen buried the two brigands we returned to him, and where his former employees too him up before he could flee.” Aric said. “The graves are a short distance east of the small warehouse that sits near the main house.”

“What will become of it?” I asked.

“It is forfeit, as are all his other possessions in the hold. It will be sold, and the proceeds will become yours, minus portions for the three holds that have seized his property.” Aric answered. “His primary residence was near Solitude, a short distance from the docks. He had another smaller residence near Dawnstar with similar access to his shipping interests. It will be a considerable sum, once it is all liquidated.”

“Whoever purchases this property best employ Tayen to cleanse it of evil.” I said. “I would not set foot on that property, or any other he owned, for all the gold in Tamriel.”

“You will soon have time to buy or build a residence of your own.” Aric said. “You need never look upon an item that was so much as touched by that poor example of a man.”

* * *

It was not too long afterwards that our four recovering elves witnessed the first group of wolves display their customary indifference to Aric’s company. These three wolves simply walked almost to the edge of the road and watched us pass. 

“What sort of wolves inhabit this part of Skyrim?” Salerne asked Lucia who rode with Vilkas immediately in front of the wagon.

“They are common wolves.” Lucia said, glancing at Vilkas and returning the smile he gave to her.

“They do not act like any other wolves we have ever encountered in Skyrim.” Lilisara said. “And we have encountered many.”

“My brother Companion, whom you know as the Thane, has a certain way with many animals in Skyrim.” Vilkas said. “They enjoy each other’s company.”

“Except for spiders!” I shouted at him from Aric’s side at the head of the column.

“And the feeling is mutual!” Aric added to the conversation.

“They are wild animals outside his presence.” Lucia said, echoing a reminder shared on another road with another group of young women. “Never trust any animal outside my Fathers presence.”

The look all four elves gave Aric also echoed the look from the other road.

* * *

Our column halted around midday. The sky was clear and held the promise of a dry journey. The slight coolness was welcome for those wearing armor. The elves wore cloaks over their borrowed, now gifted, attire. We shared a mid-day meal, and Ganra shared his basket of sweets. Lilimia and Lilisara were rapidly forming an attachment to Vilkas, as they sat together and talked. Lucia and Salerne had begun a competition off the side of the road, each casting shining magic projectiles at a dead tree stump as Ganra watched. Aric was finishing his conversation with the guards.

“How do you fare on our journey” I asked as I sat on the blanket beside the twins. “The wagon is not too bumpy?”

“We do very well.” Lilisara said, “It is a luxury for us, to ride rather than march.”

“Armor and marching are still a few days in your future.” I said. “I will speak to your commander once you are returned to your brethren. You may resume your normal duties the day after tomorrow.”

Aric had stopped by Lucia and Salerne and was speaking to both. He walked slightly father off the road and found several rocks and used a spell to cast one rock into the air. Lucia watched the arc of its flight and again cast her spell that sent a shining projectile towards the rock. Aric repeated the process with Salerne. He spoke to them a short time more before handing a rock to Lucia who cast it into the air as Aric had. Aric cast his projectile, which intercepted the rock as it reached the top of its arc.

“It is a game of aim and timing.” He said as he sat with us, watching the two mages continue the game on their own. “Hand and mind and eye. They have instructions not to tire Salerne. It does not require much energy, but best to be cautious.”

“Lucia could teach Salerne to draw energy from the earth.” I said.

“She can do that?” Lilimia asked, both twins looking from me to Lucia and back.

“That, and much more.” Vilkas said to two amazed faces. “She is a goddess in the flesh.”

“It is a figure of speech, sisters.” I said to break the spell that was quickly forming. “She is a woman as we are.”

By the look on their faces, they did not appear the least bit convinced.

* * *

It was only an hour later we heard a familiar and terrible sound.

“Off to the right.” Lucia said.

It was, indeed, off to the right; some distance from the road, flying a wide circular path.

“There is a dragon mound beneath him.” Aric said, as four elves and four guards gave the dragon their undivided attention. “That is what it circles.”

“That is our old friend.” Lucia said. “I can sense him.” She said before she closed her eyes and smiled, “and he can sense me.”

“I do not understand.” I said, looking from father to daughter.

“It is the dragon that Lucia has ridden.” Aric said, “They formed a bond at that time, and are aware of each other when nearby.”

“You have ridden a dragon?” Salerne asked, her face mirroring the expression of the other three elves.

“Father has also ridden this dragon.” Lucia said. “It is Odahviing.”

“This is the dragon you captured and then rode to the entrance of Sovngarde?” I asked

“Merciful Gods.” Lilimia said, overcome by awe, “You are mortals in appearance only.”

“I have always wanted to see a dragon.” Vilkas said. “He is magnificent.”

“Would you see him closer?” Lucia asked.

“Would it be possible?” Vilkas asked.

The column had stopped upon seeing the dragon. Lucia dismounted, and held her hand up to Vilkas. “Come with me.” She said.

The two walked off together towards the circling dragon. They stopped finally and then Lucia’s voice could be heard on the wind.

“ _Od-Ah-Viing_ ”

The dragon began its approach towards the two figures who stood like statues and waited.

“What will happen if he attacks?” I asked

“He will not attack.” Aric said. “He is as in love with her as it is possible for a dragon to be in love with a woman.”

“You continue to find new ways to amaze and astound me.” I said. “I believe you do it intentionally.”

He smiled at me. “As I said, I do not wish you to tire of me.”

“The possibility does not exist.” I said.

The dragon had landed, and Lucia walked to him, they appeared to speak for a moment before she approached and placed her hand on its head. It reminded me of Sara’s visit with the mammoths. The dragon clearly enjoyed the greeting. 

Lucia turned and motioned to Vilkas, who slowly walked up to join the tall goddess. The three spoke briefly.

“Gods” I said, “Is this really happening?”

Lucia placed a foot on the dragon’s shoulder and climbed up onto it’s back, she reached down and instructed Vilkas where to step, and the two were soon seated upon the dragon’s back, their legs dangling right behind its wings. Lucia sat behind Vilkas and wrapped her arms around the Companion as the Dragon lifted his wings, bent his legs, and propelled himself into the air.

“Gods!” more than one voice in the column said in unison.

“She is beautiful, is she not?” Ganra asked.

“They refer to it as a male dragon.” Lilisara corrected him.

 _It was not the dragon he was referring to_. I thought.

They gained altitude quickly, before settling at one height. Their adventure did not last long, but Odahviing was able to cover a large distance, traversing back and forth both sides of the road. They eventually landed, their memorable trip ending where it had begun, A short conversation, a deep bow from the Companion to the dragon, and the two figures walked slowly back to the column as the third took flight again.

“Well, brother, you are a dragon rider now.” Aric said to Vilkas.

“What does a man do when his dreams become reality?” Vilkas asked. 

“You marry her, sir.” I said before I knew what I was doing.

“I do very humbly beg your pardon.” I said to more than one red face. “From both of you. I do not know what came over me. Why do you smile at me in such a manner, Sir?” I asked Aric.

“Because you plucked the words from my mind, madam, a practice I believe we agreed you would forgo in the presence of others.”

“Sisters, you have lost much complexion, and you do not speak.” I said to the twins and Salerne. “Have we frightened you?”

“No, your Grace.” Lilisara said. “We only begin to understand what family we have adopted into our own.”

“you are too generous, sister.” Lucia said. “We are a family like any other.”

 _Hardly_. I thought.

“Father may we speak to you and Noxaura?” Lucia asked.

 _Gods_ , I thought, _are they about to announce a wedding?_

“Something is wrong.” She said. “The commander and his men are not in their announced location, and there are many dead men at Halted Stream Camp.”

“You saw as much?” Aric asked.

“We flew above both.” Lucia replied. “Many of the dead wear Pentices Oculatus armor.”

“This again.” Aric said.

“There is no sign of the Commander or his men?” I asked.

“Not near the farm or the road.” Vilkas said.

“I begin to have a bad feeling about this.” I said.

“I also.” Aric said. “Sergeant!” he called as he walked back to the wagon.

“Milord?” the sergeant asked when he approached.

Aric turned to the elves “You commander is not in his predetermined location. We do not know where he is, but his location was not visible to Lucia from the air. Sergeant take the remainder of the column and proceed to Heljarchen Hall. Inform my steward what has occurred. Remain there until I return. You are to place yourself under the command of my steward.”

“Yes, milord.” He said.

“Do not look so misused sergeant, she is a former officer in the Imperial Legion, and the two of you will soon be fast friends.”

“be guests in my home until this matter is investigated.” Aric said to the elves. “We will make you comfortable, and we will join you soon. Right now, we must leave the road and head cross country to investigate another mystery that may be related.”

“We can assist, sir.” Salerne said. “We have recovered sufficiently.”

“You may assist me most by easing my mind as to your safety.” Aric replied. “Be patient a short time longer.”

Lucia mounted her horse and removed her staff from behind her saddle. “We will meet again soon.” She said to her new worshipers as she put on her helm and looked at the twins and smiled. “Until then, do not let my brother Samuel fall too much in love with you. He will pine once you are gone, and I find it rather annoying.”

* * *

“Surly there must be a spell to allow for better hearing while wearing such a bucket on one’s head.” I said as I adjusted my helm for the twentieth time in as many minutes.

“Allow me, your Grace.” Vilkas said as he took my helm, adjusted the internal straps, and returned it to me.

“That fits much better, sir.” I said, “thank you. It no longer shifts about.”

“As to hearing, your grace, once a battle begins, you will find it is more than loud enough, even with your helm in place.” He said.

“Has my life truly become such that I can speak of battles with nuance?” I asked. “It was only a short time ago when I could not speak of them at all, not with personal knowledge.”

“It is the privilege of those who survive the battle, your Grace, to talk so.” Vilkas said, “It builds fellowship between warriors, and distracts from the horrors that are harder to discuss.”

“It would please me, sir, to share fellowship with you, though I am no warrior.” I said.

“Again, you forget your Grace, I saw you at the watchtower. And I have heard firsthand accounts of other battles you have fought.” Vilkas replied. “Your preference is to be a Priestess and a Healer. This is widely known within the Thane’s extended family, and admirable. But no one you meet this day will mistake the woman they see armed and armored as you are now. Exchange in your mind now the image you hold of yourself. You must be The Warrior Priestess when we step into the camp that we approach. It is how your opponents will see you.”

“I thank you for your well-timed advice, brave sir.” I said, “I will endeavor to employ it.”

“Rely on your training, sword sister, your arms and legs will do what is needed.”

* * *

“They have not been dead for long. Their blood is still wet upon the ground in places. Do you recognize any of them?” I asked Aric, as we stood amidst the dead Imperial soldiers.

“No, though some of them are so maimed that it is not possible to say with certainty.” he said.

“Is that significant?” Vilkas asked.

“The Legion garrisons it soldiers in Solitude.” Lucia said. “Father is familiar with many of the men and most of the officers.”

“These are not the first group of Pentices Oculatus we have encountered that did not originate in Solitude.” Aric said

“There are at least twenty dead scattered throughout this camp.” I said, as I sheathed my sword. “The Pentices Oculatus have now lost fifty men at least. Have they ever sent so many of the Emperors personal guard to Skyrim when the Emperor remained in Cyrodiil?

“Brother, I begin to believe that you have omitted details about our mission.” Vilkas said to Aric.

“No, brother.” Aric replied. “Our mission was as plain as it was stated. What has occurred here is another matter. One that we have been investigating for many weeks.”

“There are factions in both the Empire and the Dominion that favor a change of dynasty.” Lucia said. “They see allies of convenience in each other. Each faction has sent clandestine troops to Skyrim.”

“These dead are part of the Imperial faction. There are similar groups of dead Thalmor around Skyrim, sent by the Aldmeri Dominion faction.”

“Some of your recent battles begin to come into focus, your Grace.” Vilkas said to me.

“It was never our intention to deceive you, brave Companion.” I said, “We simply wish to keep our involvement secret.”

“Because we are involved up to our necks, brother.” Aric said. “What you hear now must not ever be repeated. To do so would endanger my entire family.”

“Our families are one, brother, and no word or action of mine will ever place it in danger.” Vilkas answered.

“This Thalmor faction has lost over four-hundred men.” Aric said. “It has given them pause while they evaluate whether they can safely continue with their plan. Runa, Farkas, Jordis and Jenassa are searching west of us, where I believe the Thalmor faction are based. I believe that base was their destination when their prisoner escaped and sought refuge in the watchtower. Runa and her group are to observe and report to us at Heljarchen Hall. Failing that, we will reconnect in Morthal. They are free to harry small groups of Thalmor if it is safe to do so, but they are not to endanger themselves.”

“Four hundred men.” Vilkas said, the look of astonishment clear on his face. He looked at Lucia.

“I was not present, except at the very end of the battle in which my sister earned her title, and at the watchtower. These victories belong to my Father, Sara, Samuel, and the Reverend Mother.” Lucia said.

“I also was not present at all battles. And do not forget Serana, sister.” I said.

“What title did you earn, your grace?” Vilkas asked.

“We are both in ignorance on that point.” I answered, as I looked at Lucia.

“What was it that the Idgrod the Younger called you when she dreamed of the battle on the Southern Road?”

“That was you?” Vilkas asked me.

“I was there also, as was Jordis.” Aric said. “Lucia and Runa timed their entrance perfectly near the end.”

“It was very nearly my end.” I said. “I would have died on that road but for them.”

“Barely any Thalmor were still alive when we arrived.” Lucia said.

“The three of you killed…how many Thalmor”?

“Approximately eighty.” Aric said.

“Blessed Talos.” Vilkas said. “It appeared to us that the Divines themselves had visited destruction on the Thalmor that day.” He looked at Lucia. “I should have recognized what I saw at the watchtower, but I was too enchanted then. All my mind retained was the vison of you, standing like a goddess delivering retribution. I did not remember the Thalmor that were similarly crushed outside Dragon’s Bridge.”

“That was my doing.” Aric said, “I was responsible for the two on that road that day.”

Vilkas was silent for a moment, as he attempted to take in all he had heard.

“What title did the Reverend Mother win on that day?” he asked Lucia.

“My Father must repeat it if it is to be spoken properly.” Lucia answered.

“Idgrod the Younger referred to her as _Banahrafn_.” Aric said.

“What sort of title is that?” Vilkas asked.

“It means _Raven of Death_.” Aric replied.

Vilkas’ expression said all that was needed. I had no desire to become a legend, especially when that legend involved death. Too many people have recently looked at me that way, as if they have discovered a wolf dressed as a lamb.

“I am ashamed.” I said. “You will tell me that I should not feel so, but my feelings have a will of their own. The most sacred vow I have ever taken was to do no one harm, and I have repeatedly broken that vow. Now Blessed Mother Cybele sends me these four young elves to care for as a reminder of the lives I have taken. It will haunt me for all my days.”

“I know it grieves you still sister.” Lucia said. “You feel so because you have a kind heart.”

“A kind heart is no substitute for a clear conscious.” I said.

“I have not had a clear conscious in many years, your Grace.” Vilkas said. “I have stood over too many dead opponents. Any man that takes up arms and opposes me faces death. There are times afterwards that I regret the choice he made. If he is fortunate and lives long enough to change his mind and choose life, I will rejoice in his rebirth, and pray that Talos guide him to the true path. But it is his part, ultimately to choose the path he walks.”

“You and your conscious will come to an understanding.” Aric said. “But I believe we will both benefit from the aid of the Sisters of Dibella once this issue is settled.”

“We are still presented with this mystery.” Lucia said. “who killed all these men.”

“let us search in the mine nearby.” Aric said.

This was an iron mine, and much smaller. It took little time to search. Five bandits appeared to have been killed outside, and their bodies dragged into the mine. The bodies of seven bandits were scattered throughout the rest of the mine.

“it would appear that the Imperials killed the bandits, and then were killed in turn by another force, that did not leave any dead of their own.” Lucia said.

“Vilkas, can you track the group that killed these men?” Aric asked.

“I saw what could be their track as we entered.” Vilkas said. “It was not a small group.”

“They headed almost due north, into the hills.” Vilkas said as we followed their track.

“Gods.” Lucia said, “That will place them on our doorstep if they continue in that direction.”

“We must overtake them.” Aric said. “The house is not sufficiently guarded.”


	30. With Astrid's compliments

We continued north until we came to a grotto where a giant was shepherding his mammoths.

“They turned west to avoid the giant.” Vilkas said as he continued to follow the tracks of the group that had attacked the camp, tracks that began to follow a dell higher into the hills, where the trees became thicker. 

“This is why you did not see them from your lofty vantage point.” Aric said.

The afternoon was becoming evening when the lowering sun began to reflect from many points in the forest off gilded armor.

“Now we know why they are not at our prearranged location.” Lucia said as Aric dismounted. “And who killed the men in the camp.”

“They are well concealed.” Vilkas said as he dismounted. “If the sun had not been so low, we would have not known how they were dispersed.”

Aric left his horse and continued to walk towards the elves who were now forming into groups.

Lucia dismounted and began to guide her horse and Aric’s in her Father’s footsteps. Vilkas followed as I dismounted and led Loga to follow. No faces were familiar at first, not until I saw three faces I knew, two of which were quite unexpected.

“Father, this is Fasion Adus. He is in command of this force of men.” Samuel said.

“He is commander of much more than that.” Aric said. “Commander, my name is Aric, I am Thane of Whiterun. You have already met my son Samuel, and my housecarl Nora.”

“Thane.” The commander said with a nod of his head. It took the commander a moment, aided by my removing my helm, before he recognized me. “Reverend Mother. Your appearance has changed since last we met.”

“It is a sad sign of the times in which we live, Commander, that I must dress so when I leave the safety of city walls.” I said.

“These times are certainly turbulent.” The Commander replied, “we have very recent evidence of that.”

“What occurred here sir, to deviate you from our prearranged meeting.” Aric asked,

“A group of men dressed as Imperials intercepted us, we passed the camp below.” Fasion Adus recounted. “One Imperial who appeared to be in command spoke as if he had been expecting us, though at some later date, and from a different direction. I thought for a moment that these were the men returning my wounded soldiers. I realized my mistake sooner than he did. It was his reaction, and that of his men, that caused me to inquire further. They began to retreat quickly to the camp, and when we pursued, we came under fire.”

“Have you wounded Commander?” I asked

He smiled “Yes, your Grace, but they are attended. I thank you, however, for your concern.”

“you have not yet met my sister, sir.” I said, indicating Lucia, “she was present at the fort and we treated your wounded together. We are prepared to assist your wounded in any way.”

There was no one present who could fail to notice the tall figure encased in armor much like their own. The Commander certainly had not failed to notice. He seemed equal parts wary and entranced.

“I am glad to finally have the opportunity to thank you, Sera, for the aid you provided.” the commander said.

“You are very kind, sir” Lucia replied, “I was honored that the Divines placed me where I was most needed that day.”

“It seems the Divines are in the habit of positioning you and your sister where you are most needed.” He replied before turning to Samuel and Nora “and these two warriors as well.”

“It was the question next in my mind.” Aric said to Samuel. “How come you both to be so far from home?”

“It is our watch.” Samuel said. “And our turn to patrol south and west. We were in the hills above and heard the battle below. In the time it took us to arrive the fighting had ended. I believed initially that the battle was the result of the factions turning upon each other. It was Nora who recognized that these were not Thalmor soldiers.”

“Factions, young sir?” the Commander asked.

“If the Pentices Oculatus commander had been as discerning as Nora this battle would not have occurred.” Aric said. “He could not tell one group of Altmer from another. He was expecting a body of Thalmor soldiers, approaching from the west, at a later date. He can, perhaps, be forgiven his mistake, not being well acquainted with Skyrim, or its residents.”

“You seem in no way surprised, Sir, that soldiers of the Aldmeri Dominion have been attacked by soldiers of the Empire. And you speak of factions and groups of Thalmor arriving from the west.” Fasion Aldus said.

“We have much to discuss sir.” Aric said, “And I am not sure yet how much I can share. It is not only my safety, and that of my family I consider. Past a certain point, this knowledge will endanger you and your men. And that danger does not alone originate in the Empire. You will be at most risk from Dominion forces.”

His reaction, and the reaction of everyone who was close enough to hear all, was evidence enough that these were not faction soldiers.

“Sir, you are amongst friends, if ever Altmer have friends in Skyrim.” I said, “The Thane and his family simply wish for a land at peace, where all are respected and allowed to live and prosper, and any recent actions he may have taken are only to bring that dream into reality. Consider this when you and the Thane sit in council.”

“You will sit in that council as well, Reverend Mother.” Aric said as a half smirk began to form on his face. “If you will stoop so low to council two soldiers after your lofty position counseling two Jarls.”

“You have counseled two Jarls, your Grace?” the commander asked.

“A smirk does not become a face as attractive as yours, Sir.” I said to Aric with a smile.

“A smile very much becomes a face as attractive as yours, madam.” Aric replied.

“Is this an appropriate place and time for flirting, brother?” Vilkas asked.

“You have never set terms for place and time for flirting before.” Lucia said to Vilkas.

“That is different.” Vilkas said.

“How so?” Lucia asked.

“Because with you I cannot control myself.” He replied.

“It does not sound so different to me.” Nora said.

“On a related topic, how is it Freya allowed the two of you to go walking alone without a chaperone?” Lucia asked her brother who did not miss the opportunity to blush.

 _They had both best learn to hide their emotions_. I thought. _They look as guilty as thieves caught in the act._

“This is the oddest conversation I have ever had after a battle.” the commander said. “If it does not wander too far from the current topic, may I ask the whereabouts of my wounded soldiers?”

“We will take you too them, sir, if you will form your men for marching.” Aric said. “Samuel and Nora will lead the way.”

* * *

We were required to travel east to Fort Dunstad before regaining the road and continuing to Aric’s home in the Pale. The horses stayed rearmost on the column to preserve the boots of the marching soldiers.

We stopped short of the turn off the main road.

“We pass close to a giant and his mammoths as we turn off the road.” Aric said. “My family will be your shield wall between you men and the Giant. We are old friends, and as long as we are close by and your men do nothing rash there will be no trouble.”

“You are friends with a Giant and his Mammoths?” The Commander asked, his nearby soldiers clearly sharing his skepticism.

“I have known him over half my life.” Lucia said, “Samuel is his neighbor.”

“Even yet he can be unpredictable.” Aric said, “On occasion, for reasons of his own, he takes offense with our chickens. He chased one around our grain mill some months ago.”

“It would have been comical if it had not been so terrifying.” Nora said. “I am sworn to protect the Thanes household. I thought that day would be my last.”

“He eventually tired of the chase and returned to protecting his flock.” Samuel said.

“Do we refer to a group of mammoths as a _flock_?” I asked.

“It is as good a name as any other.” Samuel said.

“Perhaps a _pride_ would also be appropriate.” Aric said.

“I believed that our conversation in the hills before our departure would be the oddest I would hear today.” Fasion Adus said. “Clearly, I was mistaken.”

“You will grow accustomed to it given time.” Vilkas said.

“How much time?” Fasion Adus asked.

* * *

The wagon had arrived before us and was next to the stable. The boy from the farm was currying the cart horse. The Whiterun guards as well as the guards employed to protect the farm and mine were talking with Freya and gesturing to different points around the family compound. Their conversation ended as the force of men came into view, and their relief was plain for all to see when Aric and his family also came into view.

“How many homes do you own in Whiterun, Thane?” Fasion Adus asked Aric.

“This house is technically in the Pale, Commander.” Aric said, “where I also hold a Thaneship.”

“Honor to you Thane.” Freya said as she approached. “You have located your lost company.”

“Yes.” Aric said. “we have much to discuss. But first, where are our four recovering guests?”

“They are in the house.” Freya said. “The farmer’s wife is looking after them. You must rescue them if they are not to be fed and coddled to the point of apoplexy.”

“Let us situate the bulk of our guests while we still have light to do so.” Aric said. “Reverend Mother, if you and Lucia will see to the rescue of your four patients, the commander, Freya and I will discuss the setting of the camp.”

“We will leave you to it then.” I said as the farmer and his son collected our horses. I began walking to the house but turned before reaching the door. “Please sirs, when you set your camp remember the story of the Giant and the chicken.”

“You Grace is almost certainly a mind reader.” Fasion Adus said.

* * *

“Ragna, do you cook for the entire company of elves?” Lucia asked the farmer’s wife.

“These poor bairns are wasting away, miss.” She answered. “Ham pie, barley soup, and venison is just what they need.”

“Yes, goodwife, but in such quantities?” Lucia asked.

“It will certainly not go to waste.” I said, eyeing the feast greedily. “Samuel and Nora will be hungry as well.”

“I clearly see you eyeing the table, sister.” Lucia said, “Sit with our patients. I will be but a moment. Vilkas has wandered off.”

* * *

It was a long table. Samuel entered but stopped when he saw the twin elves. It was a brief pause only, as his back straightened and his shoulders went back, and his chest went forward. He was still armored as I was. He stored his greatsword in a weapons rack as the twins and he traded glances. Salerne and I traded smiles while Ganra kept his eyes on his plate.

“I have not had an opportunity yet to compliment you on your armor, Milady.” Samuel said. “It is excellent craftsmanship.”

“Adrianne would be pleased to hear you compliment her work, young Sir.” I replied. “I have missed your company on the road.”

“I have missed yours as well.” He said, his gaze not wavering from the twins, who returned the favor two-fold. “But now, I believe that introductions are in order.” 

I introduced our guests to their young host. Samuel and the twins talked about the journey, and their injuries.

“I will wager whatever you like that he has already forgotten my name.” Salerne whispered to me.

“They are all so young.” I whispered back. “Can we really allow them to roam about with weapons?”

None of the three youngsters paid the least attention to our laughter.

* * *

Eventually the table filled. Conversation were many and varied. Vilkas sat next to Ganra and Nora and from the bits and pieces that were audible it was clear they were discussing Vilkas’ recent dragon ride. Lucia and Salerne had renewed their friendly conversation from the dinner in Whiterun. Whatever Samuel Lilisara and Lilimia were discussing was generating an excess of laughter. Aric and the Commander talked quietly. The atmosphere was almost festive. The commander would leave at intervals to check on his men.

“He takes great care with his men.” I said. “He is nothing like the Thalmor commanders we have experienced.”

“Yes. It took a fair amount of effort to convince him to dine with us tonight rather than to eat with his company.” Aric said. “And he would hear nothing on the subject of sleeping indoors. He will sleep in his camp.”

“Must we send the children back to him tonight?” I asked.

“The children?” he asked with a smile that grew by the second.

“You know of whom I speak.” I said. “And in answer to the question that hides behind that smile, yes, that is how I think of them.”

“You would be both sister and mother to them in that case.” He said.

“I have recently seen excellent models of women who are both sister and mother.” I said. “And for that I have you to thank.”

He looked at me in that way that drove all reason from my mind. I was fortunate that the Commander chose that moment to return.

“Commander, if you are agreeable, I believe it is time we held council.”

* * *

“you place me in a very difficult position, sir.” Fasion Aldus said once Aric recounted as much as was possible without revealing our involvement. 

“A position we share, Commander.” Aric said. “Skyrim itself is in a difficult position. Tamriel and the Summerset Isles will soon join us in our discomfort if a solution is not found soon. A solution that must come from the Isles.”

“There have been factions active since the First Dominion.” Fasion Aldus said. “They will continue to be present until the Sun shines no longer. The Empire is no different. What do they see to convince them that now is the time to act?”

“The factions see each other as allies of like mind.” Aric said. “Both favor a change of dynasty. But the faction in the Aldmeri Dominion grow concerned at the resurgence seen in Hammerfell, and they grow concerned that the civil war in Skyrim will end with an armistice.”

“you must see, Commander, that five armies fighting across Skyrim is untenable.” I said. “The people barely survived when the number was only three. You have seen the result personally. Imperial soldiers attacked Dominion soldiers. It does not matter to which faction they belonged. Your government must respond. And when Imperial soldiers are killed by Dominion soldiers, whatever faction, the Empire must respond. Skyrim will be a battlefield. Many innocent will die, solider and citizen alike.”

“And when all the soldiers from Cyrodiil and the Summerset Isles that are not aligned with these factions are abroad, fighting in Skyrim, and Hammerfell, and elsewhere, it will be too late. Dynasties will fall.” Aric said.

“I must have time to consider sir.” He answered, “I am a solider, not a politician.”

“Surely if the entire Council were made aware of this venture they would object and put an end to it.” I said.

There was a knock on the door, which opened.

“There is a visitor riding a cart approaching the house.” Samuel said, “The guard are anxious.”

“At this hour?” I asked

“I will come at once.” Aric said.

* * *

"With Astrid's compliments" was all he said as he handed Aric a sealed bundle of papers and dragged the bound captive from the cart that held him and dropped him unceremoniously onto the ground.

"Thank you Initiate." Aric said, as he opened the bundle. Cart and driver turned and retreated the way they had come.

Fasion Aldus and I had not waited for an invitation to follow Aric outside. We both stared at the bound and gagged man lying on the path near the house. Lucia and Vilkas stood near Aric, who handed the bundle to Lucia and walked into the house.

“What does it say?” I asked

_Brother, reports indicate that your contract in the southwest was successful. This is welcome news._

_We received word that a small clandestine force intended to usurp our prerogatives in Skyrim and investigated._

_We discovered several individuals. Three proved uncooperative._

_This piece of detritus is eager to tell all he knows in return for keeping all his current body parts, and his life, intact._

_What he says will be of interest to you since you and the target mentioned have a close relationship._

_Enclosed you will find instructions he had in his possession when he was taken as well as a map which you will recognize. He is yours to do with as you wish._

_Hail Sithis._

“Who is Sithis?” I asked.

“These are the instructions he was carrying.” Lucia said as she handed the document to the Altmer commander.

_We have suffered serious losses._

_High Councilor Corelas is dead._

_Elenwen remains Ambassador in Skyrim._

_Forces are seriously depleted._

_It will require time to reposition what forces remain in Skyrim while new forces can be delivered._

_Initiate prearranged plans and move against the secondary target._

_Her loss will cause sufficient unrest until new forces arrive._

_It is imperative that the conditions of her death be reviewed and strictly followed._

_There can be no evidence of any kind._

“Divines.” Fasion said. “Corelas dead.”

“Who is Corelas?” Lucia asked.

“A member of the Aldmeri Dominion High Council.” He answered. “His father is First Counselor Lovenar Joral. His brother Corelan is High Justiciar.”

“Did you know him well?” I asked

“I did not know him at all.” Fasion replied. “His brother I have met several times, since we both hold commands in Skyrim. For what purpose was Corelas in Skyrim?”

“What does the map show?” Vilkas asked.

“The Blue Palace.” Lucia said.

Aric emerged from the house again.

“A message has been sent to Solitude.” He said. 

“A message?” I asked “How?”

“The orb on the Enchanter’s station.” Aric said. “It is connected to similar orbs in all my homes.”

 _Why do I continue to be surprised by anything he says?_ I thought.

“You can send messages across such a distance so quickly?” I asked

“Yes. If Sara is in the house, she will receive it. The Palace will be warned. I must be away to Solitude very soon, but first we will question this man who does not know how lucky he is to have survived Astrid’s questions.”

“Leave him to me, brother.” Vilkas said. “He will tell me everything.”

“If you tear him limb from limb, he will not be in any condition to answer any questions.” Lucia said.

Aric stopped for a moment and looked first at Vilkas and then at Lucia.

“Yes,” she said, “he told me.”

Aric looked at Vilkas and simply raised his eyebrows.

“It came up in conversation.” Vilkas said.

“What could you have possibly been conversing about for that to have come up?” Aric asked.

“I have completely lost the thread of this conversation.” Fasion said.

“I have likewise, good commander.” I said.

“In any case, there is no need.” Lucia said. “The note says he is more than willing to talk.”

We looked at the man lying on the ground who, from his expression, was ready to explode with words once his gag was removed.


	31. A beacon of light in the darkness

“This level of fanaticism is beyond all reason.” Fasion said. “It is not just Talos worship they mean to eradicate. They aim at anyone who does not pass their test of purity. They intended to assassinate the Aldmeri Ambassador to Skyrim, and when they could not accomplish that they direct their attack at the Thane of Solitude.”

“Elisif is not only the Thane of Solitude.” Aric said. “She is the rightful Queen of Skyrim. Her death would add fuel to the civil war. The land would ignite.

“As they intend it should.” I said. “Their motivation is plain. It is clearly stated. We were aware that the factions were working together. I should not, therefore, have been so surprised that this group of assassins was equally comprised of elves and men.”

“We can assume that the remaining group will be as equally divided.” Fasion said.

“we were fortunate that this one retch had enough intelligence to choose life.” Aric said. “Neither faction would have allowed these assassins to live had they succeeded. It is the first rule of assassination: kill the assassins.”

“Will this assassin be allowed to live?” I asked.

“He has plotted the death of a Jarl, of the rightful Queen of Skyrim, of a woman I love dearly.” Aric said, “I keep him alive now in the event that he may have more information, and because I believe it would upset you if I were to walk out to the stables now and cut his throat, which is what my anger guides me to do.”

“That is the beast that resides in us all, noble Thane.” I said. “It is a beast that, once unchained, is difficult to recapture. I know your heart. You would regret your hasty action eventually. The guilt would hurt you, and the watching would hurt me. I beg you: leave his fate to the Jarl of Solitude as you left another’s fate to the Jarl of Whiterun.”

“You know well enough that I do not hesitate to excise poison from the land when I believe it will save lives.” Aric said.

“I am so aware.” I said. “But you never act in haste or simply out of anger.”

“I was as angry when I acted in the South as I am now.” Aric said. “In both instances someone I love was placed in grave danger.”

 _He loves me_. I should have been concentrating on the matter at hand, on the lives hanging in the balance, but all my mind would focus on was that the man I love says he loves me in return. It required all my strength and willpower to keep the smile growing in my heart from reaching my face.

“Yet you deliberated before you acted in the South.” I said, my mind still racing from what I had heard. “Consider now before you act. He is captured. His accomplices are dead. He is no threat in his current state. Do not rashly take a life that you cannot return.”

Aric was quiet for a moment before he took a deep breath and slowly released it. “As the Reverend Mother wishes.” He said.

“You are a beacon of light in this darkness, Reverend Mother.” Fasion Aldus said. “You are a gift from the Divines to the world of men.”

“Your words hold more truth than you can know, Commander.” Aric said.

“You are both too kind, but the question remains what is to be done regarding this second group, and their attack upon Jarl Elisif.” I said. “They will act in three days once the first attempt has clearly not succeeded.”

“The Jarl’s safety must be guaranteed.” Aric said. “I must reach Solitude as soon as possible.”

“Will they not just continue to send more assassins?” Fasion asked.

“Do you have a suggestion Commander?” Aric asked.

“We must tear out this toxic plant by the roots.” The Commander replied. “Only then will this poisonous fruit cease to multiply.”

“If I knew where this plant resided I would gladly do so.” Aric said.

There was a knock on the door, which opened as Lucia entered. 

“The orb is signaling.” She said.

The orb was indeed signaling. A swirling indigo glow emanated from it, moving, and swirling like smoke, accompanied by a humming vibration that could be felt, and made the hairs on my arms stand on end.

Aric held his hand a few inches over the orb, closed his eyes and cast a spell I did not know. The glow became constant as the smoke dissipated. The humming ceased only a short time before the glow. The entire process took less than a minute.

“Elisif is safe.” Aric said. “My message was delivered. Sara raced to the Palace and informed the Jarl’s steward. The palace is now sealed. Fifty men guard it, and the Jarl, from within. They have provisions to last for two months. She will have very little privacy. She will never be alone. But she will be safe.”

“This is a fascinating device.” Fasion said. “I have heard tell of scrying devices but have never before seen one.”

“I never knew such a thing was possible.” I said.

“It is a simple matter.” Aric said. “One summons a minor Elemental Daedra and binds it to the orbs that are to be linked together. Each orb contains a small piece of aetherium crystal. The resonance of the crystals facilitates the communication with the Daedra. This particular Daedra that is bound to these orbs, and which carries messages between them, is a Cold-Flame Atronach.”

“If you consider this to be simple, sir, I am not sure I wish to see what you consider complicated.” I said.

* * *

“This act was one born of desperation.” Aric said. “They feel their grip is slipping. They require time, and men, to reacquire it. They must be prevented. The Commander is correct: this cancerous growth must be eradicated root and branch.”

“If there is a root in Skyrim it must certainly be Corelan.” Fasion.

“The High Justiciar?” I asked

“It can be no coincidence that it was his brother sent to Skyrim.” Fasion said. “They are both fanatics, but Corelas would not willing journey outside the Summerset Isles unless the reward was great. He loves his comforts too well.” He hesitated for a moment, “loved his comforts.”

“Then Corelan must be convinced that his grand plans are crumbled past any mending.” I said, “that he must save what he can of his forces and return to the Isles. At this rate of attrition, he will cease to be a power anywhere. Surely, he can see that. He cannot be so unreasonable to bleed his forces to extinction and yield the Summerset Isles to his opposition.”

“It would be the opposite of what we believe this faction intended.” Aric said. “They meant for their forces alone to remain in the Isles while other forces were sent to fight in Skyrim and Cyrodiil. Then they could take power unopposed. Now they must draw their forces from the Isles to strengthen their position. Now the stealth they require works against them. Too large a withdrawal of soldiers from the Isles will not go unnoticed. Questions would be asked, and answers would be difficult to provide. Their involvement in Skyrim was never meant to be known. They cannot admit to their losses. Their plan would be exposed, and it would fail.”

“The council does not like unilateral action” Fasion said, “whatever the motivation. An action aimed at usurping power will bring swift retribution. These plotters place their lives in jeopardy should their plans be exposed.”

“Unless they succeed.” I said.

“I regret that you have become involved in this, sir.” Aric said to Fasion. “I have been a very poor host to burden you with this. Skyrim is not your home, and this is not your burden to bear. It is for those of us who, either by birth or by choice, make this our home and raise our families here to find a solution if we are not to find ourselves hosting a proxy war in which we want no part.”

“I would aid you in preventing that war if it were in my power.” Fasion replied. “But I cannot oppose Corelan openly through force of arms, and any report of his activity I send to the Council will be many days in transit.”

“If you are willing to write such a report, sir, you may include these documents we recently obtained as evidence.” Aric said, handing the bundle of papers to the High Elf Commander. “Other documents also are available, though I can make no statements regarding how they came into my possession, other than to say that as Thane of several Holds in Skyrim I have access to intelligence that is not available to others. That is how I can tell you that Corelan has already lost close to five-hundred men in this venture.”

“Five-hundred.” The elf said, his stunned expression indicating the magnitude of the loss.

“I take it that such a loss would be a cause for concern in the Council.” Aric said.

“It is twice the number of men that Corelan should have under his command.” Fasion said, his expression yet unchanged. “He would never be able to explain how he came to have so many men in Skyrim, let alone how he came to lose so many.”

“His characterization of his losses as _serious_ is accurate then.” I said

“It is very serious, your Grace.” Fasion replied. “He now races to move more men from the Isles to Skyrim. He depletes his reserves. If this continues his forces remaining in the Isles will be too few to execute his plan.”

“Yet as his forces bleed their lives away in Skyrim innocent lives are also lost.” I said. “I am beside myself with grief to think of the young lives already cut short. Lives that much resemble the four young wounded that sit downstairs, two of whom I now call sister by bond of love. We must break this cycle if we can sir, it is an affront to the Divines.”

“I see why the Jarls of Skyrim seek your council, your Grace.” Fasion said. “You have adopted all of Skyrim as your temple, and everyone who resides here as your flock.”

“She is referred to as High Priestess of Skyrim.” Aric said, “It is a title she well deserves.”

“You make me blush, gentlemen.” I said truthfully. “I am a simple Priestess, like any other.”

“You are unlike any other Priestess I have met, Madam.” Fasion said, “And though I do not know you well, I know already that you are far from simple.”

“The Reverend Mother is correct.” Aric said, “this cycle must be broken. If you would write your report, and see it delivered as quickly as possible, we will do what we can to convince the High Justiciar that the interests of his person and his family would best be served if he were to withdraw his forces and return to the Summerset Isles. Without their comrades to assist them the Imperial faction would collapse.”

“Could we then finally inform the Emperor of the traitors in his midst?” I asked. “The risk of assassination would certainly be eliminated by then.”

“You believe the Emperor is in such danger?” Fasion asked.

“Yes.” Aric said “It is why we have not attempted to deliver a message to him. We do not know through whose hands it would pass.”

“I can assist in that as well.” Fasion said. “A person I trust acts as Proconsul for the Dominion to the Emperor in Cyrodiil. I can write two reports in only twice the time it will take to write one.”

“In that case, sir, please take my chair, and make use of my desk. I must collect some papers for you to include with your report.” Aric said.

* * *

“ _Það er ekki skynsamlegt val um staðsetningu_.” I heard him say as I approached the alcove that held his Alchemist workbench. “ _Geturðu ekki greint eftir fjölda bræðrafélaganna þinna_?”

“I believe the stress is affecting you.” I said, “you begin to talk to yourself.”

The smile on my face let him know how seriously my words were meant.

“My friend behind the workbench has not chosen well.” He said indicating a cellar spider that sat quietly in it’s web, awaiting prey. “The remains of many of his brethren litter the floor beneath him, yet he is undeterred. I was merely sharing my opinion of his choice.”

“In a language that has not been spoken in Skyrim in hundreds of years.” I said.

“Since he lacks ears to hear with, one language is as good as another.” Aric said.

“Is this a trait specific to your nearby colleague, or something shared by all spiders?” I asked.

“No spiders have ears, not in my experience at least.” He said, “though they can sense vibrations.”

“They were spared insult, then, from my very uncivil language when they appeared roadside in their much larger form during our journeys.” I said.

“Yes,” he said with a smile, “though your reaction never failed to lift our spirits.”

“There is a word for _deriving pleasure from the misfortune of others_ , but it escapes me at the moment.” I replied

He stopped what he was doing and put his arms around me. “I have some time ago found that I take much more pleasure in the pleasure that I bring to you.” He said.

I placed my arms around him in return and kissed his exquisite lips. “Then we are of one mind, sir.” I said. “Though I fear we shall not have a moments peace to call our own for some time.”

“I clearly had not informed the Divines of my wishes for this journey.” Aric said, “I had thought we would deliver our charges and then revisit our interlude of before, when it was just us, and the road, and our campfire and tents in the evening. We were owed that much, I thought; a brief respite before the task that I find more daunting by the hour.”

“Never reveal your plans to the Divines.” I said softly, my face inches from his. “They will scoff, and scheme, and your plans will come to naught.”

“I will take your advice when next I plan a quiet moment for the two of us.” Aric said before kissing me in return. “The plans I share with them will be counterfeit.”

“Then the Divines will visit their poor weather or other inconveniences upon the innocent.” I said. “We must bear our own burdens. It is how the Divines attempt to teach us patience.”

“You are very wise for one so young.” Aric said as he kissed me again and began to massage my back.

“The wisdom is courtesy Mother Pevel.” I said as I began to melt under his touch. “And if you continue in that manner someone will find us in a highly compromising position.”

“If you will allow me but a moment, I will retrieve a tent from our wagon, and we will steal away to where no one will find us.” He said. “We will shed our clothes and hide under furs and be complete layabouts until hunger forces our return.”

“Not _complete_ layabouts, surly?” I asked him as I nibbled his lower lip.

“It is a term we can discuss once our tent is erected.” He replied as his hands pulled me in closer.

* * *

“You are very generous, but there are not enough beds for everyone, and we are certainly recovered enough to sleep in our own tents.”

It was growing late, and Salerne was correct; there were not enough beds to accommodate everyone.

“Remember that you are still under my care until tomorrow.” I said to all of them. “You will not stand watch tonight or perform any task more strenuous than going to bed.” 

“We understand.” She said. 

* * *

“What of the assassin in your stables?” Fasion asked Aric as he collected the evidence he would include with his reports.

“The wagon will return under guard to Whiterun with one additional item.” Aric said. “He will be the guest of Jarl Balgruf until he can be delivered to Solitude, and face justice from Elisif, the woman he would have killed.”

“It is a journey of two weeks for the quickest Swan ship to reach Alinor.” Fasion said. “My report to my friend the Proconsul will arrive first, but only by a few days. I will send sufficient force to ensure each courier arrives safely.”

“We have an advantage in our possession of this miscreant.” Aric said. “Astrid will ensure that his recently deceased colleagues will not be found in any form that can be recognized. I will inform Balgruf that this man is to speak to no one, to see no one. Three days before they send their next assassination attempt. Let us assume three days more for them to realize their attempts have failed. We have six days head start. We must use it wisely.”

“What will you do?” Fasion asked Aric.

“I do not yet know.” Aric replied. 

“You have an excellent mind for strategy, and excellent council.” Fasion replied. “I have full confidence both of you will land upon a solution soon.”

“It is past time you both retired.” I said to them both. “Tomorrow will wait for no one, and it will be no shorter than today.”

“The Reverend Mother is correct.” Fasion said. “I will check on my camp once more and then take her advice.”

“Until tomorrow sir.” I said.

* * *

“Is the water warm enough?” Aric asked softly in my ear.

We chose to delay our bedtime for a short interlude in the bathhouse, allowing the warmth of the water, and of each other, to melt away the tensions of the day. It seemed that every deep, slow breath I took expelled a bit more anxiety and allowed my body to form a bit closer to Aric’s as we lay together, my left hand entwined with his right, his thumb lightly tracing the lines on my palm.

“Do not stir.” I said, my cheek upon his chest and shoulder, my voice reflecting from the water. “I would not have you move a muscle lest you break this spell you have woven.”

“It is you who have cast this spell, madam.” He replied, “you have bewitched me. Our day was barely concluded and all I could think of was running off to the bathhouse with you.”

“I applaud your decision sir.” I said, my lips massaging his skin as I smiled. “It was certainly quicker than pitching a tent.”

“I am sure the guards were talking about us.” He said, “I saw them conversing after we passed.”

“Allow them some pleasure during their watch.” I said. “Standing watch must be dreadfully dull.”

“Any guard that wishes an exciting watch will eventually regret that wish.” Aric said.

“I could lay here for eternity” I said, “but I shudder to think what my skin would resemble.”

“We have yet a bit longer before you must worry about that.” Aric said as his eyes ensnared mine, “And I have some idea how that time could best be spent.”

“You have my undivided attention, sir.” I said as I smiled and eyed his lower lip as a saber cat would eye a fawn. “Pray tell in detail what you have in mind.”

* * *

“We have barely had a moment’s peace and quiet to talk.” Railius said as he sat and threw twigs into the Blue Moons forge near my adopted shack.

“You are aware that the twigs do not burn in the enchanted flame, are you not?” I asked him. “I remind you regularly.”

“Yes, lass.” He replied. “It’s just something to keep my hands busy.”

“You crafted wonderful carvings on our journeys.” I said. “I remember how surprised I was that those soldier’s hands could create something so fine.”

“It is the life of a solider” Railius said, “long days or long nights of idleness. You need something to keep you occupied and take your mind off the battle to come.”

“I wondered you never attempted to teach me.” I said.

“I though you had the hands of a Priestess.” He answered, “not suited for weapons, not even something as small as that. I see now how wrong I was. Forgive an old man’s errors.”

“There is nothing to forgive, Father.” I said. “If I need comfort at night I can draw forth a memory of sitting by our small fire in front of our small tent and watch you carve a hare from a piece of wood, or etch a sailing ship onto a horker tusk. All my memories of you are treasures.”

“You have a more tangible form of comfort now, lass.” He said with a smile, as twigs continued to fly into the enchanted blue flame. “Kyne herself brought the two of you together. If there was ever a match made by the Divines, it is you two.”

“I admit I dream of a life together, he and I. A life very similar to the dream Hamal shared.” I replied. “I continue to dream of it, even though I know it is only a dream. He is not the sole property of any one woman. He belongs to the entire world.”

“He still loves you.” Railius replied, “remember that.”

“I will never forget his words. They are engraved upon my heart.” I answered. “I can barely contain my joy when I think of them.”

“Your reputation grows as well, lass.” He said. “Jarls, Thanes, Companions, High Elf Commanders, they have all begun to think of you as a force, a Defender of Skyrim. You are a true High Priestess now.”

“Of what order, though?” I asked. “It would require a dispensation from the Mother Superior for me to rejoin the Order of Communities. What would convince her to grant it?”

“You don’t need the Communities.” Railius replied. “Start an order of your own. Call it whatever you like. You have enough of a reputation in Skyrim, and enough friends, and enough gold, which never hurts. Or, if you prefer, be a Priestess of Kynareth. You have a right to assert a claim. What matters most is not the name of the Order, but the heart of the Order, and the heart of the Order will be you.”

“In that case” I said as I hugged him, “I will dedicate my new order to you.”

He hugged me back and laughed before saying “Thank you lass but pick a more attractive image to carve above the temple door.”


	32. the Power of the Earthbones

**Chapter 32**

**17th of Rain’s Hand**

“I Return my patients to your care, Commander.” I said to Fasion Aldus. “I will not instruct you to take care of them, for I know you take care of all your soldiers.”

“They are alive and well because of you, your Grace.” The Commander replied. “I will never forget that.”

“We are in your debt.” Salerne said. “Thank you for the care you have shown us.”

“I am already missing you.” I said as I hugged the twins. “You will be in my thoughts.”

“As you will be in ours.” Lilimia said. 

“We are sisters now.” Lilisara said. “It would not be proper if we were to lose touch.”

“The Jarl of Whiterun will ensure that any letter addressed to me reaches me.” I said. “And your Commander has promised me a summer reunion.”

“As far as such a promise can bind any of us in these uncertain times, we will meet in the summer season when, it is my hope, the land is more at peace.” Fasion replied.

“Do not forget your Grace’s promise to marry a young couple in the summer season in Rorikstead.” Lucia said.

“I do not forget, sister.” I replied. “Should their young love persist so long.”

“We love weddings!” Lilimia said. “They are so festive and full of hope.”

“If you find that your path takes you through Rorikstead, you may judge the prospects of a summer wedding yourselves.” Lucia said.

“The groom-to-be has promised to repair a damaged cottage at the edge of the village for him and his future bride.” I explained. “We will track their wedding plans by the state of repair.”

“What are the names of the young couple?” Salerne asked.

It took me a moment of thinking.

“I have no idea.” I admitted.

“So much laughter will wake our neighbors.” Aric said as he and Samuel approached.

The final farewells were concluded. Samuel gave each of the twins a small keepsake. Nora barely pried her eyes from Ganra who, unlike his usual self, talked to her and thanked her for her hospitality. Lucia and Salerne smiled and laughed and hugged. More sisters through bond of love. 

_Will Samuel and Nora revert to their former relationship after this intrusion of strangers?_ I wondered. Do they draw to each other only because there are no other options? In the absence of an abandoned cottage there was no way to predict.

Aric and Lucia escorted the column of elves past the Giant and his mammoths. There was a noticeable breakdown in discipline when one of the mammoths calmly walked up to Lucia for the requisite scratching, it’s purring in delight clearly heard even from the house.

“The twins did not waste any time yesterday evening recounting the details of our dragon ride.” Vilkas said by my side. “All sound and motion in the camp ceased when Lucia stepped out of the house this morning. They looked at her like a deity had landed in their midst.”

“They treated you the same, surely.” I said.

He laughed before he answered. “No. She looks the part. I do not. Though the Commander did ask me if the story was true. He shook me by the hand when I confirmed what he had heard.”

“You are very brave.” I said. “Or you are very much in love, which is almost the same.”

“You say it plainly on the road, your Grace.” Vilkas replied. “She is everything I dream of.”

“Then cherish her, sir, and marry her.” I answered. “None of us know the number of days we are given to inhabit this world. Do not waste any of them.”

“Would you perform two weddings this summer your Grace?” he asked.

“I would perform three weddings if you could convince another couple of our acquaintance to acknowledge their feelings.” I said, “and for these two weddings I at least already know the names of the participants.”

“That should be some sort of advantage I would think.” He replied.

The Whiterun guards turned at the sound of our laughter.

“They are away finally; with what little semblance of order they could claim after Lucia’s demonstration.” Aric said. “First the dragon ride, and now this. With the mammoth purring and the giant smiling at her I am surprised the entire company did not stop and worship her on the spot.”

“It was a sight to behold, even from this safe distance.” I said. 

“You make too much of a trifle.” Lucia said. “I have known him and his pets since this house was built. And the number of dragon riders grows daily.” She said looking at Vilkas and smiling. “It will soon be quite commonplace.”

“I was just expressing that same point to the Reverend Mother.” Vilkas said.

“For your statement to be accurate, sir, you would have to considerably expand the definition of every word in that sentence.” I replied.

“Let us not quibble over semantics, your Grace, since you may do me a great service in the near future.” Vilkas replied.

“A service?” Aric asked. “What nature of service?” he asked, his gaze moving from Vilkas to me and back again.

“It is a topic for another time.” Vilkas replied. “More pressing matters await your attention brother.”

“Such as how best to use our six-day grace period.” Lucia said, still eying Vilkas in a suspicious manner.

“I have turned my mind to little else these past hours, and I cannot see a path that does not begin with the whereabouts of the High Justiciar and his remaining forces.” Aric said. 

“Is it a good sign or a bad one that the second force you sent to determine their whereabouts has not yet appeared?” I asked.

“That is another question I cannot yet answer.” Aric replied. “They may simply have failed to locate the Thalmor’s location. They may be tracking a force on the move. They may have been forced to go to ground. They may be fleeing a hostile force. There are too many possibilities. I am confident that they can manage for themselves, whatever the circumstances. But it would serve us best if they were to appear soon with certain knowledge where we can find this pest of a Justiciar and his cohort.”

“And having done so, what would we in turn do?” Vilkas asked.

“It is a fair question.” Aric replied as Samuel approached.

“The orb is signaling.” Samuel said.

“Is it always so active?” I asked as we began to walk back to the house.

“I cannot remember it ever being active before yesterday.” Samuel said.

“Would it not be simpler to simply wear one around your neck?” I joked.

The look on more than one face caused me to reconsider.

“I beg your pardon if my comment was not appropriate.” I said.

“It was more prescient that inappropriate.” Lucia said. “It is theoretically possible to achieve the same result by binding a minor Daedra to a soul gem that is infused with a portion of aetherial crystal and link the gem to the web of orbs.”

“Has this ever been done?” I asked.

“No.” Aric said. “Aetherial crystals are rare, the infusing is difficult, and the soul gems are prone to shatter. And until now I have never found it necessary or desirable to be in constant communication with anyone.” He looked at me and smiled. “It would ruin the peace of the evening camp.”

“It’s use also does not go unnoticed.” Lucia said.

We arrived at the Enchanters work bench where Aric retrieved the waiting message.

“Sophie, Collette and their force of irregulars encountered a group of Thalmor north of Kynesgrove heading west along the main road.” Aric said. “They became suspicious when the Thalmor did not stop to question them, as is their custom when the encounter a mixture of races traveling together.”

“Is it possible that they were not Thalmor but simply Altmer soldiers?” I asked.

“I understand your concern” Aric replied, “but Sophie and Collette have as much experience in these matters as anyone in Skyrim. They can distinguish Thalmor robes from those of a simple Mage. In any case, they decided to press the issue, and invoked the name of Talos, which removed all doubt.”

“How many Thalmor?” Lucia asked.

“Eighteen” Aric said.

“What casualties to their band of irregulars?” She asked.

“Two dead and two wounded.” Aric replied.

“What were the causalities to the Thalmor?” I asked

“Eighteen dead.” Aric said.

“Gods.” I replied.

“They are gathering whatever forces remain in Skyrim.” Aric said. “These were traveling west from Windhelm. It at least points us in the general direction.”

“They must have had a secrete base in Eastmarch we had not yet detected.” Lucia said.

“When did this encounter occur?” Vilkas asked.

“Early yesterday.” Aric said. 

“How long will the High Justiciar wait for these men before he becomes concerned?” I asked.

“I do not know.” Aric said. “The longer he waits, the better for us. We must find him. He must be convinced, either through argument, or bloody constraint, that his time in Skyrim is at an end.”

“I am reminded of the words of Jarl Balgruf regarding the fate of anyone who stands between two armies when steel has been drawn.” I said.

“What was his opinion of their fate?” Vilkas asked

“It was not good.” Lucia said.

“It is like a summoning.” Lucia said. “You are no stranger to summoning; the feeling between the casting and the summoned creature forming, the sense that something draws near, and nearer still, until it appears. You draw it to you and bend it to your will. It is the same with drawing power from the earth, but the drawing is more active. It requires more effort and will. You draw power, and then use it to draw more, a cycle that builds, larger and larger amounts drawn with each cycle; until the final massive draught of power that you then use to cast your spell. Once you are proficient it takes very little time to draw a large amount of power.”

I was stunned by what she described, what I saw her perform with my own eyes. Surly I was not capable of such a thing, on any scale.

“How do I begin?” I asked

“Place your hand upon the earth.” Lucia said. “Recite the spell. Feel your own power begin to draw power from the earth, as if you were using your arms strength to draw a bucket from a well. Your power leaves, other power returns, in larger quantity. Release. Draw. Release. Draw. Count. Release: one. Draw: one, two. Feel the pulsation of power leaving and returning. Match the rhythm. Feel it grow. Try now.”

I knelt and placed my hand on the ground, Aric’s home below us as we stood in the hills above. 

“Focus your mind.” Lucia said. “Take a breath. As you exhale it, cast the spell, and send your power. Feel it begin. “Breath in and draw the power to you. We will begin with two cycles.”

“What will I do with the power I have drawn?” I asked.

“Whatever you wish.” She said with a smile. “Do not burn the house down.”

I began to control my breathing. I inhaled, and as I began to exhale, I cast the spell.

“ _virtaa maasta_ ” I said as I released magical energy into the earth.

It began as a pulsation beneath my palm that began to consume my arm. I imagined a drawing up, recalling my endless trips to the well near my now abandoned shack. I breathed in, and in so doing it felt like I breathed in energy from the earth. I exhaled again and sent a small amount of that borrowed energy back, only to breathe again and draw an even larger amount of energy, which began to flow past my wrist and up my arm.

“Now stand and cast.” Lucia said.

I could not move for a moment. I was entranced by the energy moving up my arm, the feeling of power that began to course through me. I exhaled and inhaled again, as my entire arm was consumed by energy.

“Noxaura!” I heard. “Cast!”

I stood as my mind regained control and cast the spell I knew best.

Lucia stepped back as the bound sword blazed into life, far brighter than any I have ever summoned; the energy swirling around the blade was intense, almost painful to look at. Bursts of light appeared and flew away in a random pattern.

“Gods!” I said.

“Do not move.” Lucia said. “Allow it to dissipate.”

It was almost too beautiful. It left an afterimage on my eyes as I moved it in a pattern I had practiced repeatedly in recent weeks. I let out a laugh as I turned to look at Lucia.

She had stepped back several paces and had cast a ward with her left hand.

My laughter ended in an instant. Her look was concerned. Wary. I thought she would be pleased with my success. She did not look pleased.

“Forgive me sister.” I said. “I did not mean to alarm you.”

“It is my fault.” Lucia said. “I was unprepared. My first attempt was nothing like yours. I have never seen a first attempt like yours.”

“I did not stop at the agreed upon point.” I said, “I took an additional breath. Forgive me. The fault was mine.”

“An additional ten breaths would not have drawn so much power on my first attempt.” Lucia said. “It is not your fault. There is no fault to be found unless it is my fault for underestimating you.”

The sword persisted. 

“How long will it last?” I asked

“I am not sure.” She replied. “Let us wait a bit longer.”

“It is a very old technique.” Aric said. “It is practiced to this day by those who still worship Hircine and other Old Gods of the Reach.”

“The Old Gods?” I asked, not in the least bit surprised that he taught Lucia old magic. “Truly?”

“Yes.” He replied, “Worship of the Old Gods is still common among Bretons, as well as those who can trace their heritage back to the Nedes.”

“The Nedes.” I said. “That ancient race from which you were sired.” 

“That ancient race from which we were both sired.” He answered, “It would explain your affinity for the technique.” Aric said.

“Affinity is one word to describe it.” Lucia said. “It took me many attempts before I was able to draw upon any noticeable power. Runa showed no proficiency at all and did not pursue it further. Noxaura mastered it in a single attempt.”

“It appears that we have identified one of your innate gifts.” Aric said. “The ability to call upon the power of the Earthbones.”

“I have never heard of such a thing.” I said.

“It is an ability, which some call a gift from the Earth Mother, to draw power from the earth. It is referred to _as Calling Upon the Power of the Earthbones_. Such ability is commonly found among the Druids of Galen, and the Ward-Sisters.”

“I am not familiar with either.” I said. “Is there no part of my education that is not lacking?”

“You may know the Ward-Sisters by another name.” Aric said. “They are also known as Beldaman Wyresses.”

He was speaking of things that were thought to have been lost in the Second Era.

“You amaze me with your knowledge sir.” I said. “You are a tome of information.”

He smiled before he answered. “Your studies were directed elsewhere during your cloister.”

“To be able to draw upon such power…” I began, the sentence dying unfinished. “These Druids and Ward-Sisters much have been worshiped in their own right. They could have conquered continents.”

“They were, and remain still, predominantly Shaman and Healers.” Aric said. “They are attuned to nature and venerate the ancient forest. Those who reside in High Rock away from the cities commune with the Forest God of the Bretons, Jephre the Storyteller.”

“In High Rock.” I said, “away from the cities. Such as the Western Highlands?” I was referring to the home of his youth, as he was well aware.

“Yes.” He said. “My father was a Druid of Galen. My mother was a Ward-Sister.”

His mother, who could trace her lineage back to Morihaus, the son of Kyne, and Magnus, the God of magic. Both his parents possessed the gift from the Earth Mother, the ability to tap the unlimited power of the earth. The power of the Old Gods. I had known he possessed old magic for almost as long as I had known him. No, I had not known. I had suspected. I had convinced myself. But to know, finally, beyond doubt. It should not have affected me as it did. I was unprepared. 

His arms were around me before the shaking exceeded my control, his lips pressed softly to my forehead.

“There is nothing to fear.” He said. “You are safe. The world is unchanged from a moment ago. We three are no different than when we departed Whiterun. Your view of the landscape is less obstructed, that is all. You are overcome by the panorama. Allow yourself a moment to adjust.”

“You have had much to take in recently, sister.” Lucia said. “More than anyone I know. I could never had endured what you have survived. You are one of the strongest women I know.”

“Forgive me, sister, if I do not share your opinion of myself. My life recently has been defined by far too much shaking and crying to ever allow such an opinion to form in my mind.”

“They are not signs of weakness.” Lucia said, “they are signs of a functioning brain.”

The laugh escaped my mouth almost when it formed. “My brain has done far too much functioning of late.”

“My reaction to learning my heritage was much worse.” Aric said. “Hamal’s description to you has not begun to scratch the surface of that obelisk. If she told you that I was brash, headstrong, reckless, conceited, self-indulgent, she barely makes a start to describing the Godhood to which I had begun to elevate myself. You know that it was her, and others that saved me from myself. I can see for myself that you require no such saving. Lucia is right, you are one of the strongest individuals I have ever known.”

I wrapped my arms around him and rested my head on his chest, as the shaking began to subside.

The sound of the door opening downstairs and people entering signaled that my infirmity must come to an end. Aric’s arms relaxed as he stepped back.

“You are both very kind to endure these spells of mine without complaint.” I said. “Thank you.”

Steps on the stairs preceded Vilkas’ appearance.

“The assassin in your stable complains of his accommodations. Are you certain that he requires both his arms and his legs to be intact when he is transported to Whiterun?


	33. The Soul of the dragon

**Chapter 33**

“He will be away for a few days only.” Aric said to Freya. “We will ride west into the hills to Labyrinthian and then turn north to rejoin the main road to Morthal.”

“I understand.” Freya said.

“Our guest in the stables will have fewer roommates.” Samuel said as he climbed into his saddle. 

“It will be a blessing for his former roommates.” Freya said with a smile.

“I do not think it likely at this point that Runa and her party will arrive here.” Aric said, “but if I am mistaken, she will know where we have gone.”

“If they arrive soon after you depart, they can follow your trail and overtake you if they chose.” Freya said.

“It is good that the Whiterun guard are here to escort the wagon and the prisoner.” Aric said. “Keep the guard from the farm and the mine close. I do not anticipate trouble reaching here, but I did not anticipate having forty guests sleeping in our yard.”

“We will manage.” Freya said. “Do not be concerned.”

It was midday when we began to ride west into the hills above Aric’s house, passing the spot where Lucia had taught me to draw upon the poser of the Earthbones. The exact spot where I had placed my hand was clearly visible from horseback, the ground having a glasslike appearance. 

“If I understand our route correctly” I said, a few hours after our departure. “we will turn north onto the same path that Railius and I took from Morthal to Whiterun.”

“It is a common shortcut, though it is also a favorite place for bandits.” Aric said.

I recalled the attack that we survived. Even in his later years Railius had eyesight that would be the envy of any bird of prey. Sharp eyes and steady hands, even though his hair had turned grey. 

“Grey hair never did a solider any harm.” He said once. “Hands and eyes are more important.”

“You no longer need assistance into your saddle.” Aric said. “You have adapted quickly to the life of a warrior.”

“Not quite so quickly.” I said. “A bit more padding in either my armor or my saddle would be useful.”

Aric smiled and laughed.

We continued west across open country when a dot appeared in the sky to the northwest, and we heard a sound that I was growing all too familiar with.

"That is Skyborn Altar." Samuel said. "Nothing good originates from Skyborn Altar."

"Into the tree line." Aric said. "He may not have seen us yet."

We galloped to the nearby tree line and dismounted.

"What can we do?" Vilkas asked

"Pray it has not seen us." Lucia said.

"Could this not be your friend." I asked.

"No." she said simply.

The dragon continued to approach.

"Gods." Samuel said, as the distance between us and the dragon continued to decrease, "it is an Elder dragon."

"Is that bad?" Vilkas asked

"It is not good." Lucia said.

"How can you tell?" I asked.

"They are the only dragons with that pattern of color on their wings" Samuel said. "You can see it best when his wings are below his body when the sun is at this angle."

Aric unfastened his warhammer from his saddle.

"The four of you must stay together." Aric said to us "Do exactly what Lucia instructs, no matter what occurs." He looked at me and smiled, “This will be difficult. It will be more difficult if I must worry about the dragon and you as well. Brother," he said to Vilkas, "In this battle you must remain a spectator. As you love my daughter you must swear it."

The look on Vilkas' face showed the conflict, but he finally answered.

"I swear it, Brother." Vilkas said before clasping his arm. "Long life to you Companion."

"And to you as well Companion." Aric said.

There was no mistaking now that the dragon had seen us. His approach and descent was directly towards us.

Aric simply walked out to meet it.

"Please do not go." I whispered. But he had already moved into the open. My voice almost failed me when I said, "I love you."

"Keep a tight grip on your reins." Lucia said, who had her father's horse as well. "Face your horses away from the battle. We will have little time for escape if the battle goes ill. Mark the terrain. Mark the course you will ride."

The dragon's path and Aric's finally met. The dragon was still some distance above Aric as it released the massive breath of frost that it had been holding, enveloping Aric in the bitter mixture of snow and ice and air.

"NO!" I screamed, as two hand reached for my arms.

But Aric had simply knelt and covered himself with his cloak when the dragon had attacked. 

The dragons path continued past Aric as it began to turn to approach for another attach.

It was then that Aric stood and cast a spell with his left hand that brought a blinding lightning bolt down upon the dragon from above.

The bolt struck the dragon squarely on the left wing. The dragon immediately began to fall as its path turned sharply, spiraling downward.

"It will crush him!" I pleaded. "Let me go!"

"Stay!" Lucia said. "He knows what he is doing!"

The dragon landed with a sound like thunder.

Aric spoke words I could not hear, and then it seemed as if he was a blur. One moment he was distant from the dragon bringing up his warhammer and the next he was upon him, his powerful swing coming forward and striking the side of the dragon's head.

"Talos' Blood!" Vilkas said.

The dragon reared its head back and lunged forward to strike. But Aric was no longer where he had stood. He had shifted at the last instant and landed another powerful blow onto the dragon's front leg.

The roar of the dragon was deafening even at this distance. It was hurt and angry. Its massive tail began to whip forward, and I remembered Aric's story of the dragon encounter with Sara.

But the dragon's tail failed to strike. Aric was back at the dragon’s head, casting a spell that brought liquid fire down upon the dragon. 

The dragon bellowed its pain to the sky as Aric began to land a series of hammer blows, using his full strength. His hammer was taking a grave toll, when the dragon began to gather its wings, in preparation to take flight.

Aric held his hammer in his right hand, pointed his left palm straight down and cast a spell that thrust him off the ground, propelling himself high into the air.

"Gods!" I said.

His momentum carried him up and as he began to fall, he swung his enchanted war hammer up and brought it down with all his might. The dragon had just begun to lift off the ground when the blow fell upon his head with a thunderous crack.

The dragon was dead before it hit the ground, serving now only to cushion Aric's fall.

I tried to free myself from Lucia and Samuel.

"Stay but a moment longer." Lucia said.

"Let me go to him!" I cried

"In a moment." Lucia said. "Stay."

I continued my attempt to break free. But something was not right. It seemed that the dragon began to glow.

"Talos! What is happening?" Vilkas.

"Something consumes it from within." I said. 

It seemed to burn from within, until all that remained were bones and scales. Until:

"Gods." I said, "what sorcery is this?"

It was a glowing stream of energy, moving from the dragons remains towards Aric.

"It will consume him!" I said. "Help him!"

"He does not require help." Samuel said.

"HUSBAND!" I screamed.

But when the glowing reached Aric, he seemed simply to absorb it, to breath it in like air. He glowed with it for a moment.

Then he inhaled a deep breath and looked up as his mouth opened and a sound like all the thunderclaps in the world combined rent the heavens.

Then it seemed like Aric's legs failed him, as he sat down hard, his head hanging down, his chin upon his chest.

The hands released me, and I began to run.

"No. No. No. No. No no no no.” I said as I reached him. “Beloved. Beloved, look at me. Look at me. Merciful Divines spare him. Do not take him from me." My voice sounded like it belonged to someone else. My chest felt as if a giant was standing upon it.

"You will not leave me, sir." I said, as I knelt beside him. "I have lost too much. I will not lose you as well."

"Not. Today. At least." Aric replied, his breath returning in gasps.

It was at that point that I felt it was safe enough to burst into tears, as I kissed every inch of his face.

* * *

“It grows worse.” Lucia said.

“It seems that there is a limit to the number of dragon souls a man can absorb.” Aric said.

“Is that what we witnessed?” I asked. “Is that what passed from the dragon to you? You consumed the soul of the dragon?”

“It is not by will or by choice.” Aric replied. “It is part of being Dragonborn. A gift from Akatosh.”

_Merciful Divines_ , I thought, _Kynareth, Magnus, Akatosh, the Old Gods of the Reach. How many Gods had a hand in creating this man that I love?_

“Does it always affect you so?” Vilkas asked.

“Only recently.” Aric said. “Each additional soul is like too much wine poured in a cup. Some must be poured out. It leaves me somewhat drained afterwards.”

“That sound afterwards, the sound of the heavens themselves cracking open.” Vilkas said, “That was you pouring out the excess?”

“Yes.” Aric said. “It has become necessary these last few souls.”

“But it becomes worse.” I said. “Lucia says it grows worse.”

“The sickness afterwards becomes slightly longer with each new soul.” Aric said.

“Then you must cease the practice.” I said.

“I would gladly do so, my love, but it is not entirely within my control.” Aric replied.

“Are you well enough to ride?” Samuel asked.

“I have recovered.” Aric replied. “There is no cause for concern.”

“Your color has not yet returned.” I said.

“I can ride a horse, I assure you.” He said, as he took my hand. “Do not be concerned.”

* * *

We had been riding a short time after the dragon attack when Lucia road up next to me.

“You were quite upset during the attack.” She said. “I have seen you in battle before now, and you were always so confidant. Competent. This was different.”

“I was always a participant before.” I answered. “It is something different when you must stand by and watch the man you love die.”

“Sara was much of the same mind.” Lucia said. “She brought the wrath of the Gods down upon that dragon.”

“I would have sent this one to Oblivion to join it.” I said. “I do not know how you can calmly stand and watch your Father battle a dragon alone.”

“I have learned the skill over time.” Lucia said. “We have all had to learn it, as you will have to if you are to continue in his company.”

“Was it difficult for you at first?” I asked.

“I do not possess the word to describe how difficult it was.” Lucia answered.

“I would also have difficulty finding the correct words.” I said.

“Your choice of words during the battle was interesting.” She said.

“I have no recollection of saying anything during the battle.” I said in all honesty. “I have no recollection of breathing during the battle, let alone speaking.”

“You recall nothing of what you said?” Lucia asked.

“Nothing.” I answered. “I apologize if my language was hurtful, or in any way inappropriate. I was in extreme distress. Did I say something I should not have?”

“Not at all.” She answered with a smile.

* * *

“Railius and I were accosted by bandits here.” I said as we rode north, retracing in reverse the path that Railius and I took those months ago. I had begun to think of that time as another life. Before the loss of the man I considered to be my father. Before the shack. Before my life was turned upside down and inside out. 

“Do you know, I never felt fear when I was with him? Not even during the bandit attack. He had a calmness that was contagious. Every situation was matter of fact to him. _These are the facts; this is the solution_. He was always right, up until the end.”

“I have lost count of the number of times I have thought, or said, I wish I had known him.” Aric said. “I would have loved him, if for no other reason than for producing such an excellent daughter, such an excellent woman.”

“I have used up all my tears on you, beloved, or your words would yield a new flow.” I said. “I thought I had lost you.”

“Clearly, I do not have the same affect upon you that your father had.” Aric said with a smile. “Your confidence in Railius was absolute.”

“Railius was never reckless enough to face a dragon in single combat.” I replied with my own laugh.

“Will you indulge me in a desire of mine?” he asked me a short time later.

“Have I not already provided the answer to that question, given sufficient privacy?” I asked, my smile changing form slightly.

“Would you allow me to erect a monument for your father?” he asked, “To mark his final resting place?”

“You know his mind on the subject.” I said, surprised by his request. “It this a matter close to your heart?”

“As close to my heart as you are.” He answered.

“In that case, sir, how can I deny you your heart’s desire?” I replied.

* * *

The hour was growing late when we arrived in Morthal. 

“The number of my visits to this small hamlet grows long.” I said. “I will give serious consideration to personally financing a bath house if the number grows any larger. I am, after all, a woman of means and can afford it. Surly a bath house cannot be such a large expense?” I asked.

“I am Thane of Hjaalmarch.” Aric said. “and I will not hear of you bearing the entire expense of such an establishment.”

“Must Samuel now learn how to manage a bath house as well?” I asked with a laugh.

Our first destination after the stables was the Jarl’s hall.

“Well Thane, Reverend Mother, you arrive at last.” Idgrod said with her customary wit. “We had begun to think you had forgotten us.”

“Never, Jarl.” Aric said. “Developments in both Whiterun and my home in the Pale detained us for some time. We seek your council regarding some of those developments.”

“Would that you had been here earlier today when my daughter had one of her fits.” The Jarl said, “the Reverend Mother’s council would have been indispensable.”

“Your daughter had a fit, Jarl?” I asked.

“It is not the first such.” The Jarl replied. “But for the fact that she was awake at the time, they much resemble her sleeping fits.”

“You daughter had a waking dream?” I asked.

“You could refer to it that way, I suppose.” She replied. “She and Joric had just left Falion’s home when she simply stopped and became distressed.”

“What distressed her?” Aric asked. “Did it involve Falion?”

“No.” she replied. “Joric said nothing out of the ordinary occurred during their visit. She simply stopped walking and became quite agitated, speaking as if something terrible was occurring before screaming _husband_. Any vision of a husband that yield such results is a vision, and a husband, to be avoided.”

“May I see your daughter, Jarl?” I asked. “Is she well enough for visitors?”

“She is recovered.” Idgrod said. “She has sufficient practice now that she recovers quickly. You will find her in her room at the top of the stairs.”

She was kneeling at a shrine of Kynareth when I approached the door to her room. The room was somewhat larger than my cell in Wolfskull cave, and better furnished; but she was obviously not one for frilly decoration. It was not quite spartan, having a very nice rug, and an equally nice comforter; both of which I thought I recognized.

“I trust I do not disturb your devotions.” I said quietly.

She had been looking at the shrine but turned at the sound of my voice.

Her eyes grew quite large, and her hand flew to her mouth.

“It is you.” She said after a moment. “I know you. I have seen you before.”

“It is possible.” I answered. “I have stayed in Morthal before. Once with my father, and once with Thane Aric. May I come in?”

“You were there, in my vision.” She said. “You were there when the dragon attacked.”

_Gods_ , I thought, _she has the Gift_. How much did she see?

“That was what you saw?” I asked. “Earlier today, when you stopped and had a vision, you saw the dragon attack Aric?”

“It attacked all of you, until lightening and fire rained down upon it, and the God of Magic struck it dead.” she said.

The God of Magic. Aric. The descendant of Magnus.

“Your mother said you cried _husband_.” I said. “Is the God of Magic to become your husband?”

“I did not cry _husband_.” Idgrod the Younger said. “you did.”

“Dreams and visions can be hard to interpret, and also to remember clearly.” I said. “You and my mother share the same gift, so I have some knowledge of this. Believe me that you will not always be so burdened. When you are but a little older it will resolve itself into a tamer version and become a true gift.”

“Your mother suffered as I do?” she asked.

“My mother did not suffer at all.” I answered. “She was skilled at dreaming and interpreting dreams. Many sought out her talent and council. It was how we survived. You only lack maturity, and some direction and instruction.”

“Can you instruct me?” she asked. “Can you help me tame this gift?”

“I am sorry, young Idgrod, I cannot.” I said. “This is not a gift I possess.”

“But other gifts you do possess.” She said. “You dress in the armor of a warrior. Yet you did not always do so.”

“How do you know?” I asked, my concern growing.

“I saw you.” She answered. “You were there on a road. You wore a dress. There was a flaming horse. And the God of Magic.”

Her mother said she would remember little of the vision of the south road. Clearly, she remembered something.

“Do all your visions involve the God of Magic?” I asked.

“Not all.” She replied. “But of late many do. I cannot explain it, or why he invades my dreams so.”

_If she were to walk downstairs now and see Aric, she will certainly faint._ I thought.

“There is very little I can offer you in way of assistance,” I said, “Other than to say that there is nothing wrong with you. You are as the Divines made you, and they have given you a great gift. It is a gift that is only given to the strong, to those who can use it for the good of all. You are blessed by the Divines.”

“What is your name?” she asked.

“My name is Noxaura.” I replied.

“I do not feel strong Noxaura.” She answered. “I have not felt strong in quite some time. You are a warrior, so it may be difficult for you to understand.”

“I understand it perfectly.” I said, “I am very well acquainted with the view from the edge of that cliff.”

* * *

“They will need a larger Inn if you continue to bring such numbers to Morthal, sir.” I said to Aric as we sat for a late meal before retiring. “Your number will increase by four if your broad-shouldered daughter and her party arrive.”

“Or the two of you must expand your plans and build a larger Inn and equip it with a Bathhouse.” Lucia suggested.

“At this rate of building Idgrod the Younger will inherit a much larger village when she is Thane.” Vilkas said.

“Is it true she had some sort of fit earlier?” Samuel asked.

“That cannot be a smile you wear can it, young sir?” I asked him. “Someone who does not know you better will think you mock her.”

“It was not my intention, your Grace” Samuel replied. “Has the young lady recovered?”

_Young lady_. Samuel and Idgrod were the same age. “She is quite recovered.” I said.

“Is she prone to fits?” Vilkas asked.

“She had a vision of the dragon attack.” I said plainly.

“Truly?” Vilkas asked.

“Yes.” Aric replied. “She gave an interesting account. Her mother says her visions are often quite fantastic when she describes them afterwards.”

“Did she share any particular details about the battle?” Lucia asked, as she looked at me.

_I did not cry_ _husband_. Idgrod the Younger had said. _You did_.

_Your choice of words during the battle was interesting_. Lucia had said after the battle.

I felt the blood rush to my face, as I looked back at Lucia. 

“gods” I whispered, finding the table top the most convenient point to focus my eyesight.

“You were in distress.” Lucia said softly. “It was your heart speaking. It was entirely natural. There is no reason to be embarrassed.”

“I would take it as a great personal favor if we were to change the subject to the weather.” I said.

“I have clearly missed something important.” Aric said.

“It is a subject for sisters to discuss.” Lucia said, before looking at Vilkas and Samuel in turn “and no others.”

Samuel and Vilkas looked at each other for a moment, passing messages in some nonverbal form.

“I do not take your meaning, madam.” Vilkas said, “neither Samuel nor I have the slightest idea of what you speak.”

“Well” Aric said, “I have received my marching orders. I am to mind my own business and go off to bed. We have council with Jarl Idgrod at a reasonable hour tomorrow morning. Do not feel the need to stir too early.”

“I will be only a few moments.” I said to Aric.

“As will I” Lucia said to Vilkas.

Vilkas gave her look that would have lit up a much larger Inn.

“We have traveled together before.” She said. “and have shared a tent more than once. This is no different.”

“I was in no way, shape, or form, complaining madam.” Vilkas said with a smile.

“I wonder if there is a tub or basin to heat water.” Aric said. “I would benefit from some form of bath.”

“We will search together, brother.” Vilkas said. “you have arrived only slightly before me at the same destination.”

* * *

“I will not deny that it is a dream that I occasionally allow myself to build.” I said to the tall mage seated across the table from me. “A home, a family of our own. A life in a world at peace. It is a fantasy, I recognize it as such, but a comfortable one that keeps me company at night when I cannot have the genuine article. Still, that does not excuse my behavior.”

“You must stop acting as if you have done something wrong.” Lucia replied. “The dream you wish most, your hearts dearest desire, distilled down to one word, poured out in a moment of extremis. There is no beating heart on earth that will fault you. I certainly do not fault you. I am happy for you.”

“Happy that I love a man I can never have, not as you have Vilkas, or will have soon?” I asked. 

“Happy that you feel such a love for my father that it manifests in such a way.” She answered. “As for me and Vilkas, we are both wary of ruining something very precious by attempting to improve it.”

“I will tell you a secret then, sister.” I said, “Vilkas asked if I would perform two weddings this summer.”

“Did he?” she asked in a most unconvincing manner.

“He has told you already.” I said.

“We have reached an understanding.” Lucia said with a smile.

“Sister” I said, “I am happy for you. Both of you. I wish you joy.”

The door to the Inn opened as Idgrod the Younger entered.

“Your Grace” Idgrod said, “I am fortunate to find you are not all retired to your beds.”

“I was talking with my sister, sera.” I replied, “Have you met the Daughter of the new Thane of Hjaalmarch?”

“We have never been properly introduced.” Lucia said as she stood. “My name is Lucia, sera.”

“Please, madam, your Grace, sera is not appropriate for me. My name is Idgrod, a name I share with my mother.”

“You share more than that.” I said, “You will one day be Jarl in her place. Sera.”

“Divines willing that will be decades hence.” Idgrod replied as Samuel came out of his room.

“This small sliver of wax and string may no longer be referred to as a candle.” He said before stopping when he saw Idgrod.

The two young adults looked at each other and seemed to simultaneously lose the power of speech. Idgrod was first to recover.

“Good evening to sir.” She said, “I trust my late visit did not disturb your sleep. I was sent to deliver a message from my mother.”

“I return your evening wishes, madam, and assure you that your visit is most welcome, at whatever time it occurs.” Samuel replied

Lucia was waging war with the muscles in her face to maintain her composure.

“Idgrod the Younger, daughter to the Jarl of Morthal and Hjaalmarch, may I introduce Samuel, Son to the newly minted Thane of Hjaalmarch, as well as a list of holds that grows too long to recall from memory.”

“Milady, I am honored to make your acquaintance.” Samuel said after a feeble attempt to restore his hair to some semblance of order.

“Please call me Idgrod, good Sir Knight.” Idgrod replied. “It is the only title I wear with any comfort at my age.”

“Gods, did he just bow?” Lucia whispered.

“You did not imagine it.” I whispered back.

“Samuel is fortunate that Runa is not here.” Lucia said, “he would never hear the end of it.”

The two smitten youths seemed to have forgotten anyone else was present.

“You mentioned a message, future Jarl.” I said. “Were you to recite it, or is it written down?” I asked as Lucia hid behind me and smothered her laughter with her hand.

“Forgive me your grace” Idgrod said as she produced a folded piece of parchment.

“Please allow me” Samuel said, as Lucia’s laughter had proceed to a shaking that vibrated against my back.

“Thank you, sir.” Idgrod said.

“I apologize.” Lucia said as she reemerged with a prominently red face. “I have inhaled some of this excellent wine.”

“If you will give me but a moment, Milady, I will deliver this to my Father and escort you home.” Samuel said.

“I thank you sir, but I need no escort to return to the only home I have ever known.” Idgrod said.

“I would not sleep a wink Milady if I did not see you safely to the door of your home. Please.” Samuel said.

“You are too kind sir.” Idgrod said. “Of course, I will accept your generous offer.”

Judging by the amount of time it took Samuel to deliver the message, he must have simply opened the bedroom door and flung the message in his father’s general direction.

“After you Milady.” Samuel said as the two left.

A fair amount of time was require before either Lucia or I could speak.

* * *

_“Thalmor force crossed bridge west of Morthal before leaving main road and turning south._

_Proceeding southeast by path and trail._

_Estimate size of force at 25 - 35 soldiers, 4 Justiciars or Mages.”_

Aric was laying on his side as he read the late-night message as I massaged his shoulder that had not escaped unscathed from the dragon attack. The bruise was developing nicely, but he swore it required nothing beyond my touch.

“They are avoiding the main roads.” Aric said. “They still attempt to avoid detection.”

“The bridge west of Morthal.” I said.

“They were forced onto the bridge if they did not wish to swim across the river.” Aric said. “They are coming from the direction of Dragon’s Bridge.”

“They have withdrawn their forces from Dragon’s Bridge?” I asked.

“Most, if not all.” Aric replied. “This force is estimated between thirty and forty in size.”

“Traveling southeast.” I said.

“If they are not careful, they will venture too close to Eldersblood Peak and a dragon will reduce their numbers further.” Aric said.

“Does the location you predicted for their assembly point lie in that direction?” I asked.

“Estimating where they would have turned towards the southeast, Silent Moons Camp is, more or less, directly southeast.” Aric replied. “On a path that intercepts an infamous dragon lair.”

“I am not certain what I should pray for.” I said, “that they should be spared the terror of a dragon attack or that they should not.”

“This message arrived late.” Aric said. “Idgrod has observers watching for Thalmor activity.”

“Is it stealth or urgency that they travel at night?” I asked, “It is certainly not prudence.”

“It is a fair question.” Aric said. 

“Will I ever again hear of a party of elven soldiers and not think of those four who I now love so dearly?” I asked.

“I wish everyone had as kind a heart as you.” Aric said. “What a different world we would live in.”

“Your heart is bursting with kindness.” I said. “I have seen the result firsthand.”

“How came Samuel by this message?” Aric asked. “He delivered it in such a manner that I thought I should investigate whether the Inn was on fire.”

“Idgrod the Younger delivered it.” I said as I finished rubbing his shoulder and lay next to him. “She had meant to give it to me, but your Son moved almost as fast as you did during the dragon attack to intercept it and bring it to you. He was in a hurry to escort her through the dangerous streets of Morthal back to the safety of her home.”

“At that time of night, the most dangerous thing on the streets of Morthal would have been Samuel.” Aric said.

“You should have seen them.” I said to Aric as we nestled into our bed. “It was like one of the old stories. They could not take their eyes off each other.”

“It is a wonderful age to fall in love, and first loves are always special.” Aric said. “I worry that he may still be more in love with falling in love, than with the object of his love.”

“I remember it well.” I said. “I was fortunate that I never had the freedom to act. Mother Catilia kept close watch on all of us, but I always felt she singled me. Fewer liberties, more duties, more scorn, less praise.”

“I keep Samuel busy in part to distract him, but also because he truly has an excellent intellect. He is indecisive on his future, but I see the future Cleric in him. He will see it eventually. He will choose a Priesthood.”

“He has virtually the entire Pantheon to choose from, given your heritage.” I said. “But would he consider a new order?”

“A new order?” Aric asked. 

“I have decided to take your, and Hamal’s, advice.” I said. “I will start a new Order in Skyrim. I will found it upon the tenants from the Order of the Communities as well as those of Kynareth.” 

“I cannot find the words to express the joy and pride I feel.” Aric said. “This is excellent news for Skyrim.”

“I must write to the Mother Superior in Bruma, asking for dispensation and reinstatement.” I said. “I hope that she will allow it. It would give me the right to keep a shrine of Cybele in the Temple. And Danica must assist me with the rites of Kynareth.”

“Hamal would welcome you with open arms.” Aric said. “May your new order also include Dibella?”

“I would be honored.” I said. “Dibella has been on my mind this evening. The younger Idgrod would benefit from a visit to Markath, and the Temple of Dibella. Her visions trouble her still. Hamal could help her greatly. Others would also benefit from Dibella’s healing love, were it only a bit closer. That is why I will build a Temple in Whiterun.”

The way he was looking at me was rapidly erasing all thoughts but one from my mind. “You are a treasure to Skyrim.” He said. “And to me. You will have ample assistance building your temple. You will not want for funds.”

I looked back at that beautiful face. That face that I had kissed over and over as the tears poured down my own face.

“I thought I had lost you today.” I said. “It was like losing Railius again, the grief I felt. It consumed me.”

“You were not so disturbed during our first dragon encounter.” He said.

“I did not love you yet.” I said, wiping my eyes as a laugh escaped my lips. “And I was still plotting to murder you.”

He took me in his arms, his look still wiping my mind of all thoughts save for him and kissed me in that way that he knows lights the fire within me.

“Well then, it seems that your opinion of me has somewhat improved since then.” He said.

“Somewhat.” I replied, as I rolled on top of him.


End file.
